#78


		Goldsboro N. Carolina
		       April 5th 1865
Dear wife I received your good long letter only
two days ago and one yesterday that was
written two weeks before I am well as
ever and was glad your last letter was so
cheerful when I get a good and cheerful letter
from home it seems to give me new strength
to go along but when I get a downhearted one
then I feel as if I wanted to go right home
and cheer you up  I dont know as I had better (?)
your down hearted letter at all but will allude to
it a little you say when I came away from home
I seemed so cold in leave taking it seems as if
I sought the first opportunity to get rid of you
well I know you dont think so only when
you have got the blues or sick So I dont lay
anything up against the best woman in my
estimation God ever permitted to live. God only 
knows my feelings on that awful morning
that I left home to help fight the battles of
my Country Money did not hire me to go into
the army but I felt it my duty and I could not
stay at home. God made me as I am and I cant
help it. I thank God that I have a wife that
has made me what I am we cannot tell each


		79
				
others feelings nor each others thoughts, but thank
God we can tell each other of our feelings. I know
that I never was tired of you and I know that
you know it too only you was sick when you
wrote that letter so we will take a good kiss in
imagination and let it all pass I am glad it is
so pleasant there my time is about half out but
the last half will be served at home I think
for this summer will certainly wind up the war.
We are preparing for a long Campaign Sherman
has issued an order for every man to be prepared
for sixty days without writing a letter to his friends
so you must not get discouraged if you should
not hear from me again for two months but I
will write as often as I can. you must write as
often as you can and direct your letters to
Simeon A Howe. Co "M" 1st Mich Engrs. Washington, D.C.
and it then it will follow me where ever I go.
We are not allowed to take any writing materials along with
                                     and
us but I am going to try ^ smuggle a little paper through
with me and some envelopes too, tell Arden that I will
write to him some when I get time but I am in too
much of a hurry at present. I dont think I shall 
try to find a place that our means would touch
for I know my wifes love for the first home she
could call her own and she shall have the privilige

					79
			April 5th, 1865


of living liveing on it as long as she lives for all
any act of mine. I know I can get a living on
it for my wife and children and that is all I
want in this world and I mean to be prepared
to go when the Lord sees fit to call me hence
I do not have any bible to read and I if I
had I could not be allowed to carry it but
the thought that I have got a wife and
little ones at home that are under the pro-
tection of God keeps my mind Stayed on
the Lord I can pray to him not once nor
twice a day but all the time for his mercies
to rest on my wife and little ones and that
he will permit me to once more behold them
this side the grave and I believe God has heard
that prayer and I believe he will Grant the
blessing when anything comes up that is
wrong for me to do I stop and think what
if my wife and little ones would suffer from
my sin by Gods withholding Some of his
blessings from them for a punishment
for my sin and that puts me on the right
path again and I ask God to forgive me.
Well I must close my letter for want of room
and say good bye once more my love
May God forever Bless you and care for

79



you in my absence. from your ever true
and ever faithful husband
		Simeon A Howe

Kiss both the children for me and tell
them Pa will come home as soon as he can
			S.A.H.