Camp 1st Mich Engrs Louisvill Ky.
				June 21st 1865
O My dear the almost awful newes has come
at last O if I could have come home and
Seen my dear little one once before he died
and heard his little prattle when I came away
from home I Felt in my heart that
god would Spare my little ones to me
untill My Return and I had great faith
in Gods promise that I felt in my heart
that I Should See my family all once more
and enjoy their pleasant and happy Society
but it is all dashed to the ground and
My hopes are all Blasted. no not all thank
God for dear Arden is left to me yet
if God Spares his life untill I can get
home I Shall come home as Soon as
I can get a furlough I have Made
an application for, one, perhaps it will
never get around but I hope it will
William got a letter from Cynthia just

now and I opened it and read it and
She does not Seem to have any great love
for you. but I will not tell what She 
wrote but it was no good words about
you. I am comeing home as Soon as
I can get my pay. and that will be
Soon. O My little boy why could I not
be permitted to See him once more before
he left to go to his Maker poor little
fellow he wanted to See his pa before
he went away O My God why was this
thing Sent upon Me, it Seems as if I
could not even enjoy mySelf at home
again, but I Must resign Myself to
My fate let it be good or bad but
hundreds of times have I went to god
with my prayers and asked him to
hold his practicing hand over My wife
and little ones at home and asked him
to permit me to once more See them all
on this Side of eternity and I thought
that he promised for I pleged My
Self to Serve him the rest of my days

and bring my children up in the fear
and admonition of the Lord but O God
these hopes are all blasted, it Seemed
to me while on the long and tedious
March from Raleigh N.C. to Washingt[on]
that that I was comeing home and the
thoughts of those happy momen[ts] that
I would Spend in the bosom of my
family Made Me urge Myself to the
utmost and I would be as new when
Might would overtake us it seemed as
if I wanted to go on but it was no
use for Mustering out is delayed
and My little ones are going to
God with out my being able to See
them after all, O. Arden I Know you
are lonesome without little owen to play
with and O My God Spare you to me
untill I come home for you are all
My hope now My home would be desolut[e]
without you Good bye God Bless you
is my prayer
		Simeon A Howe