.........

AVS'IUDY OF THE
PROBLEMS INVOLVED IN
THE RADIO ADAPTATION ‘
AND PRODUCTION OF
":SH'IZR‘IEEN GREA‘I SHORT STORIES

$355“;

This is to certify that the

thesis entitled

"A Study of the Problens Involved in
the Radio Adaptation and Production
of Thirteen Greet Short Stories."

"I presented by

Ihry Jeanettorlnrtin

has been accepted towards fulfilment
of the requirements for

‘0‘. degree in Sash Q
Dramatic-

   
 

Major professor

Date Septe-ber 1, 1945

 

 

 

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A STUDY OF THE PROBLEMS INVOLVED IN THE RADIO
ADAPTATION AND PRODUCTION OF THIRTEEN GREAT SHORT STORIES

by
MARY JEANETTE‘EAEEIN

A THESIS
Submitted to the Graduate School of Michigan
State College of Agriculture and Applied
Science in partial fulfilment of the
requirements for the degree of

MASTER OF ARTS
Department of Speech and Dramatice

1945

“Hit";

3-,».

PREFACE

I wish to acknowledge the kind help given by
Mr. Paul D. Bagwell and by Mr. J. A. Callaway, both in
the organization and execution of this thesis.

I also wish to express my gratitude to Mr. Walter
John.McGraw for his suggestions in the compilation of
the scripts and production notes and his aid in the
production of the scripts. To Miss Betty Jayne
Littlefield, also, I extend my thanks for her work as
assistant director. And, finally, I should like the
students, who worked so faithfully as actors, sound
men and engineers, to know that I deeply appreciate

their efforts.

175885

TABLE OF CONTENTS

_ Pages
PART I - Introduction - The method used in
the compilation of this thesis and
problems of radio writing and
production 1-26
PART II - The scripts and notes on the
adaptation and production of each
script 27-248
Division of the scripts adapted 27
Stock Opening and closing 28
The Cask of Amontillado and Notes 29-45.
The Confession and Notes 44-58
Pickwick Papers (a part) and Notes 59-75
Fight at the Mill and Notes 76-94
Child Spy and Notes - A 95-110
Open Window and Notes Ill-125
My Remarkable Uncle and Notes 126-141
Fog Horn and Notes 142-158
Haircut and Notes 159-175
Jane and Notes 176-195
\ Night Club and Notes 196-211
My Name is Aram (a part) and Notes 212-229
Uncle Fred Flits By and Notes 230-248

BIBLIOGRAPHY

PART I
INTRODUCTION

THE METHOD
USED IN THE COMPILATION OF THIS THESIS

AND
PROBLEMS OF RADIO WRITING AND PRODUCTION

1

Radio, though a comparatively new medium, is rapidly
deveIOping and improving along both educational and
entertainment lines. Its rapid growth has been as amazing
as the miracle of radio itself. As radio has been expanded
and refined mechanically, so have the services which the
mediun.offers. .Music, news and variety shows have attained
a high degree of perfection. However, except in a few
isolated instances, radio drama has not kept pace with the
rising standards of the medium.

A Radio drama is different from.any other kinds of
dramatic literature, due to the variations between this
medium.and other dramatic media. Thus, we should see emerg-
ing a radio ggggg, a type of literature which has a true
artistic value, in addition to an amusementvalue. Certain-
ly, there have been strides made. Norman Corwin, for
instance, has created a kind of literature which is at once
distinctively his own and radio's. He has been much
imitated and has thus helped immeasurably to improve the
literature of radio. Too,“shows such as the Cavalcade 9;
America, Columbia Workshop and Lg; Radio Thegtre, though
far from.well~written, for the most part, have taken a
step in the right direction: Yet, there is still much to
be desired when one surveys the field of radio writing.

V Although these shows (particularly the Corwin shows)
have developed a worth while radio literature, many daytime
-serials bring little of value to the listener. Yet, day-

2

time serials reach.more people than do such productions
as those Just mentioned. Thus, it seems eminently suitable
that if the standards of radio literature are to be really
elevated, the foundation should be laid in these daytime
programs.“

hence,"my desire in writing this thesis was to bring
to the average person, listening to daytime dramas, or
soap Operas, as they are often termed, a better type of
radio writing than is now being presented.“ Much good
literature has not been available to the radio audience
because it is too seldom.translated from another medium to
radio and produced in place of the present kind of drama.
I hOped that by effecting the transfer, I might present a
kind of radio script that would encourage listening to
more valuable literature and, at the same time, stimulate
the reading Of good literature.

“ My aim has been to write a series Of fifteen minute
scripts to be used in place of a daytime serial: I have
attempted in this series to overcome the faults inherent in
many of the so-called soap Operas playing today. I am not
condemning all soap Operas, but I do believe that many of
them treat their subject-matter with such a degree of over-
sentimentality as to render the story ridiculous. The
heroines and heros are constantly in the throes of some

tragedy so exaggerated that one finds it difficult to

respect the protagonists. In an attempt to eliminate this

3
defect, I chose to adapt stories of accepted literary value.
Thus, I made certain that the subject-matter was basically
well treated in the original. Then, I tried to transfer
the spirit of the original to the adaptation for radio.

Another fault of much radio writing is a result of
what I consider to be the misconception that the radio
audience is too stupid to remember what has happened from
day-to-day. This misconception sometimes leads to ten
minutes of recapitulation and four and a half minutes of
further develOpment of the story. .A current daytime serial
indulged in this sort of plot-padding, as it might be
called, for three weeks, during which thus the heroine stood
with her hand on the door knob of the doctor's office and
thought back over her life-history. Although I believe
that, even in a serial, the reestablishment of characters
and plot could be accomplished more concisely and effectively,
this necessity was eradicated in my series by making each
story complete in one episode.

Also, by making the episodes complete unto themselves,
the "what is going to happen tomorrow" technique, which is
often used undesirably, was avoided.

“ ‘While I was careful to choose stories of literary
‘worth, equal care was exercised that the stories contain a \
‘universal appeal.‘ Thus, I hOped to ensure audience interest.
free, I attempted to make the series entertaining enough to

euicourage people to tune in for each broadcast, regardless

of the fact that there is no suspense carry-over frmm
program to program. H

However, the elimination of these defects, prevalent
in much present day radio writing, was incidental to my
primary purpose which was: as I have pointed out, to bring
to radio good literature of a kind which is all too seldom
presented through this medium, namely great short stories:
It has been my arm to show that if a story has literary
value, it has radio value and could become a part of a
kind of radio literature of high quality.

Having determined the purpose of the thesis and chosen,
the stories for adaptation, the next step was the actual
writing of the scripts. Writing radio drama requires the
same knowledge of the basic elements of drama as does writ-
ing for stage or screen. Yet, it goes without saying, that
there are certain techniques peculiar to radio writing. It
must be constantly borne in mind that the radio writer is
actually appealing directly to only one sense - that of hear-
ing. It is often said that, in radio, you write for a blind
audience. In a sense, this is true. Certainly no radio
listener today can actually see the lift of a character's
eye-brow or the shrug of his shoulder. But, the writer,
director and actor combine their efforts to ensure the
listener's seeing it in his mind's eye. The writer provides

dialogue that will fit the gesture, the director, perhaps,
suggests the voice inflection of the reading that will

5
indicate the gesture and the actor puts into his voice the
tone that implies the gesture. He probably even executes
it as he reads 'on.mike”. At home, the listener sees the
gesture in a mental image. Or, it mmy'be that the listener
sees a similar gesture, instead, one which is even more
familiar to him.but carries the same meaning. At any rate,
he visualizes. _He does not Just blindly hear.

Nevertheless, the fact that the auditory sense is the
only one to which direct appeal is made in radio has certain
effects upon radio drama. .Mental pictures must be built up
in the listener. Action must be talked about as it is being
done. Descriptions of people or places must be inserted
into dialogue or into narration. Characterization is
necessarily created prhmarily by the voice and dialogue,
though occasionally characters may, in the course of con-
versation, describe another character.

All of these things, which present little difficulty to
a writer for stage or screen, are problems for the radio
writer, because they must be portrayed in dialogue which
actually sounds like conversation. A great danger is that
dialogue describing action, appearance or character will
sound forced. Of course, a good radio writer soon learns
to bring these things in naturally and easily and bit by
‘bit, rather than in one or two speeches. Or, if the radio
writer deems it necessary to get the exposition out of the

sway quickly, in order to get to the action and struggle, he

will do it in a conversational way to avoid unnatural,
forced story-telling.

There are, Of course, certain mechanical tools of
radio which may be used by the writer to aid him in this
process of visualization. There are sound effects, for
instance, which aid in the creation of atmosphere and the
visualization Of the action of the play and the movements
of the actors. If a writer understands skillfull use Of
these effects, his problem.will be much easier. Other aids
to visualization are the fades in and out, which indicate
the action and location and perspective of the characters.
These obviate the necessity of the writer having his
character say, "Here I come", or "Now I am going." Fades
are also valuable in indicating movement. Having a
character say, "Just a minute I'll get you one," and fade
out and then fade back in, saying, "Here it is," is ample
evidence to the listener that he has walked across the room.
These fades also help the writer to make transitions in time.
For example, the writer can have his character fade out as
he says, "I remember when I was a little boy-—-", and then
have the little boy fade in, talking, and the listener has
made the transition without being told, "Now I'm going to
tell you about a scene in my childhood."

Another device which lightens the writer's burden is
Inusic, with which he can command atmosphere and mood and by

‘which he can indicate passage of time or change of locale.

With all of these aids, however, the writer still must
make his dialogue indicative of action, appearance and
character. i

Furthermore, the necessity for constantly providing
means of visualization for the listening public is not the
only problem.radio imposes upon a writer. Simplicity is
also encumbent upon the radio scribe. The radio listener
wants to imagine himself as the character in the story to
which he is listening. If the character chances to be a
villain, he wants the villain to be like someone whom he,
himself, might conceivably encounter. He also wants the I
character to say things he or his associates might say, or,
at least, think, and in the same sort of language in which
they might say it or think it. If the speeches are stilted,
the entire story loses all probability for the average
listener. Furthermore, in a radio show there is seldom.time
to deal in lengthy explanations of the character's tempera-
ment. The listener must understand and know the character
without too much explanation. Thus, the need for simplicity
of character portrayal is evident.

Again, simplicity is a prerequisite of the good radio
plot. In the first place, the plot should consist of the
kind of situations in which the listener and his friends
could possibly be involved. The dilemna presented should
levoke emotions common.to most and understandable to all.

S-econdly, the writer must beware of the fact, in construct-

ing his plot, that he is usually appealing to only one
person, or, at the most, a group of three or four. Mass
psychology will not work as it does in the theatre. That is
why, for instance, war stories are narrowed to the exploits
of a single hero, rather than to the daring deeds of a

whole squadron. Here, once more, simplification enables

the listener to satisfy his desire to imagine himself as the
character. Thirdly, the number of characters in a radio play
must be limited. It is difficult for the listener to keep
in mind.more than six leading characters. The use of'more,
in leading roles, usually results in confusion of identity,
though more may be brought in for bit parts. No matter how
many or few are used, it is up to the writer to give the
leads distinctive characteristics; so that the listener will
have a different and clear concept of each.

The problems of visualization and simplification are
not the only ones imposed upon the writer by radio. Another
very vital demand is that the pace of the play be rapid.

The listener has not gone outside of his home and presented
himself to be entertained. When the radio drama cmmes on
he is, probably, engaged in some occupation about the house
and is often interested almost against his will. His
attention must be gained at the outset and held throughout.
If the drama does not move he may shut it off and return to
whatever he was doing. Stimulation is required to hold

attention because the audience can become bored with a radio

9
play even more quickly than with a stage play, where there
are costumes and scenery and personalities to be seen to
compensate for dull writing. Consequently, action must be
swift. Above all, there gp§§_be action. There is need for
,ggipg, not Just talking. True, there may be talk about
actions, but, if it is well-done, that kind of talk presents
a picture of action to the listener's mind. However, even
that kind of talk must be broken up with direct action,
music and sound effects so that the movement is still rapid
and interesting. Pace is, at all times, a matter of utmost
importance in any drama and particularly so in radio drama.

Another problem.involved in radio writing is the matter
of good taste. Since radio goes into the home, the subject
of the play, the types of characters, the language they use
and the situations in which they find themselves must be
acceptable to all ages and to all classes and creeds. This,
a writer for radio is obliged to consider at every turn.

Out of the fact that radio is so much a part of the home,
in which there can be no differentiation of audience, has
grown the censorship of radio. Radio writing demands
impeccable taste.

Another difficulty, under which the radio writer works,
is the limitation.of playing time. Dramatic shows may run
any place from.ten minutes to an hour, but there is only one
full hour dramatic show on the air and the majority of such

jprograms run frmm fifteen minutes to a halfehour. Consequent-

lO
ly, plot, atmosphere and characterization must be com-
pressed. Tableaux are presented in place of detailed
pictures. Further, seconds are vital in radio and a writer
dare not over-run his alloted space on the air. Thus, there
is imposed a purely mechanical compression.

Added to all Of these exigencies is the fact that the
radio writer usually has only one chance to make good. A
radio script is only presented once and there are not months
of rehearsal in back of it. The script has to be right the
first time. It is rare that a writer has the Opportunity
I have had to hear his work done and then revise it.
Ordinarily, such revision would be to no avail because the
script would never be done again.

Despite all Of these demands which the radio writer
must satisfy in his script, radio writing has certain advan-
tages. Every medium.has its restrictions and many of those
just listed are universal in any kind of writing. However,
radio has two great assets which make it a flexible medium
and permit the writer a good deal of leeway. One is the
rapidity and ease with which a scene may be changed. The
listener's mind can change a scene much more quickly than
he could be shown a change. An automobile motor sound effect
and some music can transport the listener from.city to city
in thirty seconds, with no attendant sense of incongruity.

A listener can be transplanted from.manhood to boyhood by

a flash-back and feel perfectly natural. Another instance

11
in which the radio writer has freedom.is the matter of
format. There is no limitation to the number of scenes
in which a drama may be performed. The play may consist of
a number of short, fast scenes, or two long ones, or an
admixture. Which combination of scenes the writer chooses
depends upon the playing time he has for his show, the
kind of drama he is portraying and the plot and the mood
of the drama. At any rate, in these two instances the
absence of rules and the presence of the listener's visual
imagination.make the radio writer's task an easier one.

I have shown some of the problems to be met in radio‘
writing of any kind and some of the advantages. Now, what
are the problems of adaptation of a story?

In a story, background exposition is a matter of
simple telling. Description may set the scene and the mood.
The situation may be easily described in the first paragraph.
In radio, the announcer may, at the beginning, be able to
describe the scene in which we first find the characters.
He may, too, be able to explain the situation but, usually,
this technique is both obvious and dull. ,A narrator may be
incorporated to carry this type of description throughout
the play, but,except in cases where the spirit of the story
demands it, that often seems the weak and easy way of adapt-
,ing. In most cases, the background exposition has to be

included in the dialogue.

12
Usually, most of the description of the scene is also
inserted in the dialogue, though sound effects and fades
help here. The mood can be set by sound effects, music and
voice inflection. As I have already pointed out, the
descriptions and exposition are incorporated in the dialogue
in a subtle and natural way. They should be brought in
gradually and in a conversational manner. It is seldom
possible to set the scene or describe the situation in one
or two speeches. Little bits Of description may be brought
out in a series of speeches between two or more people. It
is not good technique for one person to say, "Ah, what a
lovely day it is. See the tiny green leaves on the trees
and the babbling brook and the sweet little birds, etc."
That is not a natural speech. On the other hand, it might
be done like this:
1st Person: Umm--what a nice day it is.
2nd Person: Yes. The leaves are such a pretty sort of
green this time of year.
lst Person: Let's sit down here. I like to listen to the
brook, don't you?
2nd Person: All right, think it's warm enough to go wading?
Oh--say--look at those birds----over there.
lst Person: Oh, yes. They gag pretty!
In a story, of course, this could all be said in a few
descriptive phrases and, furthermore, the reactions of the

Characters to these phenomena could be described. Not so,

13
in radio. Take into consideration, too, that if the ”2nd
Person" had said, ”Yes-uthe tiny leaves are like little pale
green fairy feathers”, the listener would have felt uneasy
because of the stilted language, whereas in a story, it
might have been considered highly desirable. It is true,
of course, that many lines of a rather literary nature, if
read naturally, will carry. But, as a general rule, the
more colloquial the words, the better. In conversation,
the most cultured peOple use contractions and slang that
they would never write. So, whereas in print a,"Yep",
might seem incongruous, say, in the mouth of a playwright,
in radio it heightens the illusion that the character is‘
really talking. All that I have just said concerning the
differences between the handling of description in a radio
play and a story holds for the handling of background
exposition in both.

So much for background exposition and description.
Now, for characterization. The author of a short story has
the whole story in which to build character, with the
Opportunity of describing revealing physical characteristics
and actions in exposition and the character's mental
reactions by simple phrases and adjectives. Naturally, in
radio, these must again be transposed into dialogue, which
should be disguised so that it does not sound like exposition
ear description. Furthermore, this must be done quickly, as

a radio script contains action, not description, as its

14
primary device. A complicated or subtle reaction or
psychosis in a character may be carefully explained in a
story, whereas, in radio, since there is no chance to
explain things in detail, the character and his thoughts
and actions must be easy to understand. Furthermore, in
a story, much can be accomplished with the words, ”he thought
to himself," but, in a radio play, it would be quite dull
to have a person talking to himself too often or for too
long a period. It is true that a stream-of—consciousness
technique can sometimes be used very effectively, but not
if it is overdone.

Now, for the differences in plot develOpment. Allow
me to repeat that in radio, the important thing is the
gains, The plot needs rapid development, which does not
admit of long descriptive or expository or characterization
passages. Such passages, though they enhance a story, only
detract from.a radio play. Stories are not limited in
subject matter by the question of universal acceptability,
nor by the obligation for simplicity, as are radio dramas.
It is true, too, that radio audiences seem.to prefer plots
which develop ideas, whereas, a story may be completely with-
out moralization of any kind or may be completely frivolous.
Thus, the varied audience which is radio's is, in a sense,
a.limitation to radio literature. Also, the fact that the
radio listener must often be interested in spite of him,

self,'whereas when someone picks up.a story to read he is

15
presenting himself to be entertained, demands of the radio
writer that he provide a rapidly moving drama.

Those are the differences between writing the short
story, as written for reading, and the radio script, as
written for listening. As to the writing in this particular
series, the problems of each individual adaptation have
been taken up in the notes accompanying each script, but I
should like to explain briefly my methods in compiling
this thesis.

It is interesting to note that, although stories have
been told throughout the history of man, the short story,
as a literary form, dates,'really, from Edgar Allen.Poe.
Certainly, there are brief tales, in prose and verse, and
anecdotes which have been handed down, but, it was Poe who
said the short story,ga§ a form and defined it for posterity.
Hence, I began my series with him. Showing the origin of
the short story in America, France and England, I first
presented the story by Edgar Allen Poe whose principle
device was suspense. Then, I went on to Guy de Maupassant,
who did for France, according to some critics, what Poe did
for America. IHe was a great master of the art of story
telling. Though his works were less violent than Poe's,
he lacked Poe's sympathy and warmth. Still, he greatly
influenced succeeding authors in all countries. A work of

his seemed a logical choice for my next adaptation.

 

16

Continuing my presentation Of the precursors Of the
modern short story in the three countries, I chose a work
of Dickens for the next adaptatiOn. Though he wrote novels,
his Pickwick Papers are really a compilation of short
stories, which greatly influenced his successors.

After showing, through these three men, the origins Of
the modern short story, I then traced the development of
this literary form, in the three countries, by choosing two
representative authors from each country. my first choice

was two French authors, Zola and Daudet, who reflected the

influence of the originators, yet added their own character
istics (in Zola sociological study; in Daudet emotional
tenderness) to the form. Further, both Of these men wrote
about the same things as were being written of in England
and America at that time. Thus, they were typical Of their
times, as well as their country.

The next two scripts are adaptations of H. H. Monro,
or Saki, and Leacock, English writers. Saki is, of course,
one of our better known short story writers, while Leacock
is more famous for his essays. However, the type of humor
with which Leacock's essays are endowed has exerted an
influence on all forms Of the humorous writing Of our day and
it seemed worthwhile to include one Of his works. Both of
these writers, by their distinctive styles, initiated formats
which have since been widely used. They are both comparative-

ly recent writers. Leacock is, of course, still living

17
today, yet he, like Saki, has a spirit about his writing
which was more of the last century than of present day.
They are, in a sense, midway between the authors previously
presented and the moderns and, it seemed, to me, that their
contributions to the growth of the story should not be over-
looked.

For the American development, I chose two authors who
are of the same period as Leacock and Saki. These are
Gertrude Atherton and Ring Lardner, whose types and handling
of plots marked another trend in this kind of literature.

Having shown the deveIOpments in the three countries,
I turned to the modern short story. It so happens that,
included in this section, are two British and two American
authors, but it is not intentional. I simply chose stories
representative of those we most often read today. Taking
first the classic type of short story now'pOpular, I chose
Somerset Maugham as the best example. I next dealt with
the kind of stories frequently published in ”slick
magazines". JMy choice for this category was a story by
Katherine Brush, because she is one of the best known and
the most accomplished of writers for this kind of publica-
tion. Finally, I adapted two works by two men who write a
sort of literary short story, Saroyan and Wodehouse.
Wodehouse could be called a "slick magazine” writer.
Certainly his stories have frequently appeared in such

publications. However, his work is most assuredly not

16
typical of that kind of writing and could not be included
in the "slick magazine" category for this reason. Both he
and Saroyan have originated kinds of stories that have a
value of their own as special types. They are, I should say,
short stories of a unique kind and, as such, have had, and
'will have, their influence.

It is to be hoped that the matter of the writing of
this thesis has now been adequately explained here and in
the notes accompanying the scripts. But, after the first
writing was completed, there was still more to be done. The
scripts were produced as a studio project (net actually
broadcast), in order that I might hear my writing as it
would really sound on the air and make corrections accord-
ingly. The production problems of each script are also a
part of the accompanying notes. however, I should like to
discuss the general production problems to be met in any
drama broadcast and the manner in which they were met in
the production of this thesis.

The first step in getting a production on the air is
always the preparation for the broadcast. In the first
place, in.many cases, copywrights have to be cleared. If
my scripts had gone on the air, I should have had to clear
the copywrights. I should have been required to write to
the authors of the stories adapted for permission to broad-
cast my adaptation. If the show were to be used commercial-

‘ly, there would no doubt be a royalty fee on many of the

19
scripts. However, the works of many of the earlier writers
have become public domain and could be used without con-
sulting anyone.

Again, a show actually aired would have required clear-
ance of the music cOpywrights, too. In the ease of a live
orchestra, the director would have to see to it that the
orchestra played only music and arrangements for which
permission had been granted through ASCAP or BMI or direct—
ly from the composer. If records were used the same thing
would be true. However, I had no such problems, since the.
scripts were not actually broadcast, but were done over a‘
public address systems

After the clearance of rights has been accomplished,
the director's next step is to arrange for the music. In
a series a theme is usually chosen which will be played each
time to introduce the program and, so, identify it. In my
case, I chose as theme a fanfare passage from.Tchaikowsky's
VIth Symphgnz. Once that was done, introductory music
needed no further attention. But there was always the task
of choosing the music for bridges. Bridges are used to
indicate a change of time or place. They must be carefully
chosen to convey the mood of the preceding and the succeed-
ing scene. For instance, if the preceding scene is one in
which fear is expressed and the succeeding is to bring out
a terrifying experience, the bridge might begin softly and
'sadly and build to a crashing crescendo. With a live

 

20
orchestra, such a thing would not be difficult to achieve,
since they could improvise. However, to try to find a
spot on a record, which contains the desired change of
mood and is still only about twenty seconds long, is very
often an impossibility. In such a case, it will serve if
two records with two different effects are cross faded. If
this is done, care should be taken that the recorded or-
chestras are matched and the passages are not too dissimilar,
as they must blend together. Because of these difficulties,
many directors do not use this method. However, I found
that, while it took longer to find proper bridges of this'
type, they were more effective. Naturally, many times, the
bridge is required to portray only one mood and then the
only problem is to choose music that really produces the
desired effect.

Music used as background to enhance an emotional scene
requires the same kind of careful choice that does a bridge
and, in such a case, the passage must be very carefully
timed so that the fade out at the end of the scene sounds
natural.

When using records, it is necessary to be consistent
as to size and types of orchestras. Using a symphony
orchestra for one bridge and a string trio or organ for
anotheerould sound very unprofessional.

A good music selector is of vital importance to any

good production. If the music is to be live, all the

81
director has to do is to explain to the musicians the type
of things he wants, let them.work it out themselves and
then listen to the results to see if they are satisfactory.
If records are being used, the desirable thing is to have
an assistant who chooses the music and then submits it for
the director's approval and then explains to the engineer
hOW'lt should be executed as to spotting and fading. In
the case of the production of this thesis, the person who
chose music also engineered it. For a Job like that, it is
best to have a music student who is familiar with various
compositions and knows where to begin to look for certain ‘
effects. It is important that the person who does the
engineering be particularly adapted to this sort of work.

I had try-outs for this, Just as I did for acting, because
there is a sort of sixth sense used in the choosing and
engineering of recorded bridges. In.my particular instance,
because students are limited as to time, it usually occurred
that my assistant director and I had to pick the music and
sometimes to play it, though, when we could get her, we had
a very competent music engineer.

After the music has been chosen and approved, it is a
good idea, particularly if working with amateurs, to have
a rehearsal with the music engineer alone. .A spot rehearsal
with cast is preferable to rehearsing alone with the music
engineer, but it is not always possible.

 

. . — . ’rqw"

22

These things are also true of the sound rehearsal.

The director should work with the sound man before the
actual rehearsal to see if the sounds being used produce
the correct effect. In an amateur situation, where the
sound man is comparatively inexperienced and the available
effects extremely limited, this often requires a lot of
experimentation. For the Poe show, it was necessary to try,
for example, several different chains rattling in various
places in the studio, to produce the particular sound wanted.
This pro-rehearsal of sound decides the things which are
going to be used and, as much as possible, without voices,
how far from the micrOphone they will be used.

Having already pretty well set the music and sound,
leaves a director’more time to work with line interpretations
at the actual rehearsal of the entire cast. The more time
for line interpretation and direction when working with a
comparatively inexperienced cast, the better.

Next, the director decides what studio set-up he will
need (the number of’microphones, types of micrOphones, etc.)
and.communicates that information to the engineer. In my
case, I simply set the studio up myself before the rehearsal.

Once all of these things are arranged, the director
then plans his rehearsal time as economically as possible,
though he must, of course, be sure the time allotted is

adequate.- In professional radio, economy of time is necessary

‘because time costs money. In a college set~up, the less

23
time spent, the more apt you are to get a cast, because
students are busy peOple, too. However, there must be
imbued in students of radio a knowledge of how'important
it is to attend rehearsals and to have adequate rehearsals.
Never stint on rehearsal time but do plan it carefully.

Many directors cast first and then plan the rehearsal
time. Either way is acceptable, depending upon the
situation. If the rehearsal time is planned first, then the
next step is casting. In casting, a director may know whom
he wants for each part and simply cast them, if they're
available. However, the chances are, he will have several
people in mind and be in doubt as to which one will best
suit the part. In that case, whether it's a professional
or amateur production, voice tests are made. In an education-
al set-up, voice-tests are given.more often than in pro-
fessional radio because the idea is to give opportunity to
as many people as possible. Still, the most important
thing is to get a person whose voice fits the character,
who can act,‘who can take direction, who knows microphone
technique and who is available for all rehearsals. If
possible, do not cast people who require a great deal of
work in interpretation because rehearsal time seldom.allows,
in amateur radio, and never in professional, for line by
line direction. If use is made of someone who has never
done any radio before, cast him.in a minor role. The bulk
of the cast should be familiar with fades and where to stand

24
or too much time will be used in explaining mechanics and
not enough on rehearsal._ In addition, inexperienced peOple
tend to forget such mechanics under the stress of actual
production. It must be remembered that a radio actor should
be able to create a convincing character quickly.

In amateur productions, such as those in college, cast-
ing requires particular care to avoid the dangers already
mentioned and to be sure that the voice is correct. It is
sometimes difficult, for instance, to find a boy who can
sound like an old.man.

The importance of listening for balances cannot be
overestimated. No two voices should be too similar. This
is to avoid confusion of identity by the listener and, also,
to enable the actors to build distinctive characterizations.

The problem.of casting doubles is always a hard one
because, especially in amateur circles, there are few people
who have at their command several different voices. However,
it is desirable to keep the cast down to as few as possible
and avert rehearsal confusion. Doubles should always be
in bit parts and, where you do not have very good doubles,
space the roles doubled as far apart as possible. This is
also done in professional radio where the doubles are usually
more capable.

As to the actual rehearsals, I found it best to have
an actors' read-through the day before the production was

to be recorded. At that time, after I had described each

25
character and how I wanted it played, we read the script
straight through once without stopping. A very rough timing
may be obtained here but it will be far from.accurate on a
first read-through because of the actors' unfamiliarity with
the script. Then I made further suggestions, after which
we read through again, stopping for interpretations and
corrections wherever needed. The next day, we had a read-
through on mike, without sound effects or'music, during
which.more suggestions were made, and a read-through with
music and sound, again, stOpping for instructions as to act-
ing, sound and music. Then, we had a dress rehearsal,
which was as near like the actual production was to be as
possible. Then, more direction and a few minutes to rest
and revise, and, in some cases, a bit more practice on a
certain scene or of a certain musical bridge or sound
effect. After that, the show was recorded. Naturally,
during the second and third read-through on mike, the
producer was timing the show and cuts, or needed changes,
were made after each read-through.

If I succeeded in getting the show off on time, if the
actors had remembered to look up from their scripts to
receive cues and directions and had not rattled their scripts,
no music or sound cues had been late and no one had lost
their place in the script, I felt a good Job had been done.
As to the acting, I had, of course, already ensured that

being as good as possible in casting and in rehearsal.

26

Those are the problems to be faced in any radio
dramatic production and those are the problems I, in
particular, met in the production of my thesis scripts. I
believe I learned a great deal from this portion of the
thesis, though the primary reason for the production.was in
order that I might smooth off the rough edges of my writing
and not that I might learn more production. However, no
matter how often one has directed individual scripts, there
is a great deal of experience to be gained from.having to
produce one each week.

After hearing my scripts produced, I made changes,
both in rehearsal and after the production was finished,
wherever they were needed. In some instances, I rewrote
whole scenes. But I have explained the changes made in
the notes with each script.

Naturally, the advantage to my script-writing was
tremendous. As I have said, few writers have a chance to
correct the errors in writing that have gone out over the
air. In this case, I was given an Opportunity that comes
to few radio writers and the benefits were well worth the

concomitant difficulties.

PART II

THE SCRIPTS
AND
NOTES ON THE ADAPTATION AND PRODUCTION

OF EACH SCRIPT

27

DIVISION OF THE SCRIPTS ADAPTED

ORIGINS OF THE SHORT STORY

 

Poe, E. A. The Cask of Amontillado

 

de Maupassant, Guy The Confession
Dickens, Charles The Pickwick Papers (a part)

DEVELOPMENT OF THE SHORT STORY

 

(FRENCH)
Zola, E. The Fight at the mill
Daudet, A. The Child Spy
(BRITISH)

Saki The Open Window

 

Leacock, S. My_Remarkable Uncle

 

(AMERICMJ)
Atherton, G. Fog Horn
Lardner, R. Haircut

THE MODERN SHORT STORY

 

(CLASSIC TYPE)
Maugham, S. ‘lggg
(SLICK momma rues)

Brush, Katherine Night Club

 

(LITERARY"TYPE)

Saroyan, W. My'Name is Aram (a part)

 

Wodehouse, P. G. Uncle Fred Flits By

 

MUSIC:

28
STOCK OPENING

TO BE USED AT THE BEGINNING
OF EACH SCRIPT

Portraits in Prose

THEME UP AND UNDER

The first men sat around their savage campfires
and told stories. Through the ages, man has
recorded his own history in narrative. Nothing so
well reflects the thoughts and ideals of a given
period of man's existence as the tales of that
period. Hence, we bring you a series of radio
adaptations of some of the worlds greatest short~

stories. Today, we present a radio adaptation of

STOCK CLOSING
TO BE USED AT THE END
OF EACH SCRIPT

Ybu have Just heard an adaptation by.M. J. Martin
or ................. by --------------- 0
Those in todays cast were:

THEME UP AND OUT

ANN:

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29
THE CASK OF AMONTILLADO
By Edgar Allen.Poe
Adapted by M. J. Martin
Stock Opening --- Edgar Allen.Poe's --- The.
Cask of Amontillado----
UP AND OUT
OMINOUS come
I hated him. I hated Fortunato with a poisonous
hatred that ate into my brain and heart, as acid
eats stone. I had borne a thousand injuries, but
when he cast his greedy eyes upon my wife -----
I decided to kill him. (PAUSE) Ah -- but I was
not a fool. I must punish once and for all, with
no danger to myself. A wrong is not avenged when
there are unpleasant consequences to the avenger.
No, no it must be a careful deed. Ah, but not a
quick one. ‘What good.if Fortunato does not have
time to realize in his suffering that he is being
punished? It must be clever and my every thought
was of how it could be done. Oh, don't misunder-
stand me--Fortunato never guessed my thoughts. I
kept my hatred well sheathed whenever I met with
him, I was pleasant. We were the best of friends.
(HADES OUT)

Hail, Fortunato. I didn't expect to find you here.

(Well met, Sir. What? Not expect to find me where

there's wine? Ah, Montesor, the duke has the best

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50
cellars in the kingdom. He asks my advice.
Of course, you are skillful in the Italian vin-
tages--- a true connoisseur -- there are few like
you. The duke is wise in asking your counsel.
True, true. I pride myself on that.
There's none to compare with you, my friend --
unless it could be Luchesi.
Nonsense, dear fellow, Luchesi is an ass. Oh,
but come, the duke has some Amontillado, genuine
too, you must taste it. It's the Nectar of the
Gods. I know. The duke himself was unsure, but
I had only to sniff it and I knew (FADES OUT)
(FADE ON) I knew then what my revenge would be.
Fortunato's weakness was wine. I was not unlike
him in this. The wine cellars of the Montesor's

were not to be scorned. Down in the catacombs

were vintages as aged as the bones of my ances-

tors that lay there. But --- to my story. I
waited until the height of the Carnival week
(FADE OUT)

Gambelli, help me with my dress --- hurry.

Ah, Milord, you wear the costume of a common
laborer. It is not gay enough --- your regular
dress would be more in keeping with the Carnvial
than this.

Never mind that -- just help me finish dressing.

GAME :
MONT :

MONT :

FORT :

31
Ah, there -- anyway it suits my mood. Now call
the servants together and tell them I shall be
gone until dawn but I want no one to leave this
house. I won't be bothered with a houseful of
drunken serving men tomorrow --- send them all to
bed --- go yourself. The Carnival is not for
servants. Mind now, I mean what I say.
Yes, milord, it shall be as you say. (FADE OUT)
(FILTER FADE IN LAUGHING) I knew that would
ensure their immediate disappearance, one and
all, as soon as my back was turned. (FADE IN
CROWD NOISES OF GAYETY) And I had plans... My
heart was gay, as gay as the drunken revelers
that Jostled against me as I walked the streets.
I hadn't far to go.. I saw him standing in a
crowd, laughing drunkenly at the antics of some
dancer. He was dressed as a court fool in a
tight-fitting, party striped dress. As he laughed
he threw back his head and the bells on his fools
cap Jingled. The costume suited him well. ..I
went up to him (FADE OUT)
My dear Fortunado, you are luckily met. How
remarkably well you are looking today: But I
have received a cask of what passes for Anion-
tillado and I have my doubts.
(DRUNK) Oh, Montesor, I scarcely recognized you

MONT:

FORT:
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umwr:
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humor:

32
in those dark clothes. Hello, geod old fellowb
-- glad to see --- Did you say Amontillado? A
cask? Impossible! And in the middle of the

Garnivali

I have my doubts...and I was silly enough to pay
the full Amontillado price without consulting
you in the matter. Ybu were not to be found and
I was fearful of losing a bargain.

Amontillado:

I have my doubts.

Amontilladc:

.And I must satisfy them.

Amontillado!

As you are engaged, I am on my way to Luchesi.
If anyone has a critical turn, it is he. He will
tell me ---

Luchesi cannot tell Amontillado from.Sherry.

And yet some fools will have it that his‘taste
is a match for your own.

Come, let us go.

Where?

BELLS JINGLE

(COUGHS) To your vaults.

My friend, no, I will not impose upon your good
nature. I perceive you have an engagement.

Luchesi.----

FORT:
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MUSIC:

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your:

33
I have no engagement, come... (COUGHS)
BELLS JINGLE
My friend, no. It is not the engagement, but
the severe cold with.which I perceive you are
afflicted. The vaults are insufferably damp.
They are encrusted with niter.
Let us go, nevertheless.' The cold is really
nothing. Amontillado: Ybu have been imposed
upon. And as for Luchesi, he cannot distinguish
Sherry from Amontillado. Come, come, give me
your arm and let's be off «Ah, that's right,
put on your mask again and let's hurry. If it
is Amontilladc--- (FADE)
RATHER.RAPID AND LOUD, BUT SINISTER-—- UP AND
OUT
OPEN AND CLOSE DOOR
(FADE ON) I might have known those blasted
attendants of mine would leave the instant I
shut the door behind me. Well, no matter.
Here, we'll take these torches and go down.
COUGHS REPEATEDLY.
BELLS JINGLE
This way, good friend, right through here.
I've always thought your apartments most spacious,
Montesor.

(NOT LISTENING) Ah, and now through here.

r—n—ai ,.—— J‘

SOUND
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FORT :
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SOUND
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34
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
Ah, here is a suite I've never seen before. Is
this where you entertain your ladies, my friend?
Um, --- Just a few steps more.
This is much too dismal for ladies, eh, Montesor?
So---here we are. Let's go down (SOUND OF.
HEAVIER DOOR OPENING AND CLOSING) (ON FILTER)
He came innocently down to his death, chattering
inanely. We walked a long time through the
catacombs. Fortunato became impatient. ‘
The cask, Montesor?
It is farther on, but observe the white net-work
which gleams from.these cavern walls.
Um~--so there is---so there is---
BELLS JINGLE AS HE TURNS HIS HEAD
(COUGHING) Niter?
Niter. ‘ch’long have you had that_cough?
BELLS JINGLE AS FORT. COUGHS
(COUGHS) A long time. It is nothing.
Come we will go back. 'Your health is precious.
Enough, the cough is a mere nothing; it will
not kill me. I shall not die of a cough.
True, true.~ Indeed, you'll not die of a cough.
I had no intention of alarming you unnecessarily

'--- but you should take all preper caution.

Here, see these rows of shelves? .A draught of

SOUND

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SOUND
FORT:

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SOUND
MONT:

35
this Medoc will defend us from.the damps.
GLASS BREAKING AS HE KNOCKS OFF THE NECK.OF A
BOTTLE
Here---drink.
BELLS JINGLE
Ah---(LAUGHS) I drink to the buried that repose
around us. Hmm--good.

And I drink to your long life. Here--take my
arm and let us go on.

These vaults are extensive.

The Montesors were a great and numerous family.
I forget your arms....

A huge human foot of gold, in a field of azure
blue, the foot crushes a writhing serpent whose
fangs are embedded in the heel.

And the motto?

No one harms me without punishment.

BELLS JINGLE

Good --—good--~Ah, the wine warmed me, ch---what
about you?

It is warm in my veins too.

It is well.
of bones without something strengthening inside
(LAUGHS AND COUGHS)

I couldn't endure these great heaps

of me, eh, Montesor?
BELLS JINGLE

Here's my'armpagain. Here take it. (LAUGHING)

FORT:

MONT:

FORT:

MONT:

FORT:

MONT :

FORT:

SOUND:
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36
I believe you need it, dear Fortunato. Here
bend down. It is necessary to stoop to pass
through this low arch. 'Watch your torchc-don't
set your robes afire. There, through safely?
Ugh, the air is so foul in here it almost
extinguishes our torches. Hideous place----
bones piled against the walls to the ceiling.
Yes, taken from the vaults as they were emptied
for new occupants.
What's this? The bones have been moved away
from this wall.
Yes, see the niche in that wall? The.Amontillado
is at the back of it. Just step over that heap
of bones there and go in.
Hmmp-the torches are burning so low I can't see
the end of it. Oh, no matter—~you say the
Amontillado is at the back?
Proceeds Ybu'll find it at the end there. Iim
right behind you. As for Luchesi-----~-
He is an ignoramus ---eh --- what's this? I can
go no farther--; there's a.wall.
STRUGGLE AND CLANKING OF CHAINS --- BELLS RING
True, my friend, you can go no father --- not
now -- not now that I have you chained to this
wall. There, you're safe and without too much

trouble, eh, Fortunato?’ Pass your hand over the

___—’I

FORT:
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BOUND:

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37
wall. You can't help feeling the niter. Indeed,
it is very damp. Come -- I implore you -- let
us return. No? Then I must positively leave
you. But I must first render you all the little
attentions in my power.

But ~-- the Amontillado.

True -- the Amontillado. Now let's see ---
BONES BEING THROWN ASIDE

Under this heap of bones you so carefully stepped
over, my friend, we have --- building-stone and
mortar}! Now, my trowel, which you thought was
a Jest:

PILING BRICKS ON TOP OF ONE ANOTHER AND TROWEL
SCRAPING ON TOP OF THESE.

Ah, my wall is coming nicely. Soon you'll have
a little room.all to yourself, Fortunato, where
no one will ever disturb you. Nice you were
drunk, old fellow, didn't even struggle you were
so surprised --- very cocperative of you.
(MOANS)

Come, come, Fortunato, that's not the moan of a
drunken man. Don't tell me the effects of the
wine I wasted to get you in a passive state are
wearing off? .Ah, another tier finished.

CHAINS BATTLE FRANTICALLY

Ah---a pleasant sound-~the clanking of chains.

FORT:

SOUND:

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38
Almost finished nowb- (SOUND OF BRICK-SETTING
THROUGHOUT) Yes, two or three more tiers and
you'll have a good solid wall at your back. Just
like the one you're chained to-—No one will ever
know the difference.
SCREAMS PIERCINGLY
SCRAPING AND SETTING OF BRICKS ONLY SOUND FOR
SOME SECONDS
SCREAMS AGAIN
Go on scream, it's all complete but the last
stone-~eh--it's a heavy one. Up it goes nowa-A
almost in--Just a little farther.
BELLS JINGLING AND CHAINS RATTLING
(LAUGHS WEAKLY) A very good Joke indeed--an
excellent Jest. We will have many a rich laugh
about it at the palace over our wine.
The Amontillado.
(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY) Yes, the Amontillado.
But isn't it getting late? Wont they be waiting
for us at the palace, the Lady Fortunato and the
rest? Let us be gone.
‘Yes, let us be gone. I'll go ahead. Don't take
too long with the Amontillado.
BELLS AND CHAINS.
(SCREAMS) For the love of God, Montesor....

‘Yes, for the love of God. What else have you to

SOUND:

MONT:

MUSIC:

39
say, Fortunato? Fortunato! Fortunato: Oh,
well, here, here's a torch to see by. I'll
leave that for you.

TRUMP OF TORCH DRIPPING TO FLOOR --- BELLS JINGLE
---- THEN BRICK-SETTING AGAIN

There. Now the last stone. I must hurry-- it
grows cold~-I must be done (FADE) (FADE IN ON
FILTER) My heart grew sick because of the damp-
ness of the catacombs. I forced the last stone
into its position. I plastered it up against
the new'masonry. I replaced the old rampart of
bones-~For half of a century no mortal has
disturbed them. In.Peace Rest.

UPAND OUT '

STOCK CLOSING .....

40
Notes on the.Adaptation and the

Production of Poe's
The Cask of Amontillado

Reasons for Adaptation

”The Cask" is one of Poe's best known stories and it
is distinctly representative of him.in plot and style.
Further, it has not, so far as I know, been as frequently
done on the air as has, The Fall of the House of Usher and

The Pit and the Pendulgm, Of course, a story by Edgar.Allen

I

Poe comes under the heading of necessity in a collection such
as this, because he has so long been considered by many to

be the father of the modern short story.

Adaptation Problgms
The main problem.in the adaptation of this story was

the need for a tremendous amount of exposition and, at the
same time, a constant build to climax, with suspense sus-
tained throughout this exposition. Because all motivation
in the original story came from.the mind of the main charac-
ter and because all of the irony was in the diabolical plott-
ing of this man's mind, a narrator in the script was a
necessity. Of course, a disinterested narrator could never
have sustained suSpense, hence, the device of the narrator
speaking in the first person. This enabled the flavor of
evil to be carried into the script, with little loss, from
the story.

Another problem in adaptation arose because the original

story had an abundance of action and description, which it

41
would have been clumsy for the narrator to relate. Thus,
the conversation of the men had to build ammosphere. This
is particularly noticable in their talk about the foul air

and the niter in the cellar.

Casting and Acting
In casting it is particularly important to balance the

voices of Fortunato andeontesor. This is vital to the
creation of the individual characteristics of each role
and to show the contrast in their natures.

In the acting, it is necessary for Montesor to play
the part in a restrained manner but avoid building up
sympathy, even at the end. On the other hand, Fortunato
must commend sympathy, though he is not written as an
admirable character, by any means. Montesor must never
express too much emotion, as his is the cold, calculating
type of hatred and cruelty.
sound

The sound pattern is a simple one. .However, the chain
rattling must be handled with care or it may overshadow the
‘voices. Thus, it should be off-mike, but not too far off,
or'it will disturb the perspective, in as much as the person

being chained is on mike.
Script Changes

This was done in the scene where Montesor and Fortunato
are descending the stairs to the vault. I had originally

I:included.more conversation as they walked down in order to

42
further build the evil intent that was Montesor's and to
elucidate on the drunken state of Fortunato. However, when
the script ran long it seemed that that conversation was
incidental enough not to harm the script if it were omitted.

A few lines throughout the script were also cut in the
interests of timing. The lines that were out were chosen
with care, so that neither the plot nor mood suffered from
the omission.

Another cut‘ was made of an entire scene. The scene
consisted of the two characters breaking and Opening a second
bottle of wine while in the vaults. Since the scene was ‘
included in the story effectively, I had thought it would
heighten the suspense element. However, during rehearsal
it was found to be tediously repetitious of the preceding
scene and so was cut.

Also it was found that the openingspeech by Montesor
was too long to be effective and it was shortened. To make
up for this shortening of a speech that was intended to show
the tremendous hatred Montesor felt for his enemy, more

intensity of interpretation is demanded. However, I believe
that the shorter the speech, the easier it is to sustain a

high pitch of emotion and so the dramatic value was actually

augnented by the change.
Further, the first rehearsal revealed that having the

narration on filter provided a great deal more variety than

having the same voice on mike all of the time. Too, the

43

filter carried better the impression that the narrator was
thinking to himself. Luckily, the narration dent itself
well to filter miking, though it demands careful speech on

the part of the narrator.

ANN:

MUSIC:

ANN:

MARG:

SUZ:
MARC:

SUZ:

MARG:
SUZ:
MARG:

SUZ:

44

THE CONFESSION
By de Maupassant
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening --- Guy de Haupassant's ---

The Confession.

UP AND FADE TO BG

Spring has come to the South of France and warm
breezes caress the tiny village of Saint Pierre.
But the townspeople passing the home of the
Therelles sisters feel a cold wind brush past
their cheeks. They look at one another fear-
fully. "It is death," they murmur. Inside
Marguerite de Therelles is dying.

(FADE IN) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Suzanne,
Suzanne, are you near?

Yes, sister, I am right here. (SOBS)

Go and fetch the priest -- the time has come.

He is coming. Oh, Margot, my poor little one.
Don't leave me --- it isn't right -- you're six
years younger than I --- it isn't right. (SOBS)
Be quiet, Suzanne --- is the priest coming soon?
He will be here at any moment, Margot.

When he comes, you must stay and hear my con-
fession.

Oh, no, my little one --- that is between you and

the Good Lord and Father Simon.

MARG:

SUZ:

SOUND :

SIM:

MARG:

MARG:

SUZ:
MARG:

45
(WITH GREAT EFFORT) No ---no, you must promise
me, Suzanne---
Margot, my child, lie down. I'll stay if you
want me.
(THE DOOR OPENS)
The priest, my dear.
Father Simon --- the time is here --- it's here
--- what shall I do. ---.- how can I?
(FADING IN) _ I know --- I know --- God forgive
you my child... here take my hand --- be brave
now. The time has come. Speak.
Mercy ---oh, mercy, sister, forgive me: Oh, if
you only knew how all my life I have dreaded
this moment.
What have I to forgive you, little thing. (SOBS)
You have given me everything, sacrificed every-
thing for me; you are an angel. You never
married because of me and---
Hush ---hush: Let no speak.... do not stop me...
it is horrible. Listen...you remember, you
remember Henry.. .
Remember Henry ----- of course --- but ---
You must hear it all, if you are to understand.
I was twelve, only twelve, you remember that,
don't you? And I was spoiled. I did everything

that came into my head: Don't you remember how

MARG.2:

SOUND:
MARG.2:

46

spoiled I was? Listen... the first time he came
he wore shining boots; he dismounted in front of
the steps and (FADING OUT) you were not there--
but--I was there ---

Is this the Chateau of Monsieur de Therelles?
Yes, Monsieur --- did you wish to see my father?
I apologize for my appearance, but I've travelled
a long way. I've brought news from Paris for
your father. .

Papa is in his study --- will you come in?

Thank you. Perhaps I can brush some of this dust
off my clothes. A

HEATING CLOTHES WITH HANDS.

It doesnflt matter. Papa gets quite dirty when he
rides. Come in.

(LAUGHING) Does he now? But I'll bet you're
never dusty. I'll bet you always look as fresh
and pretty every moment as you do right now,
little one. Tell me, do they starch you from head
to foot?

Monsieur, I'll take you to my father.

Oh, ho --- quite the little grown-up, aren't you?
Look here... uh-ewhat's your name?

Marguerite.

Look here, Marguerite, I didn't mean to offend

you. I meant it as a compliment --- honestly I

MARG.2:
HEN:
MARG.2:
HEN:
MARG.2:
HEN:
SOUND:
FATHER:

SOUND:

MARC. 2:

MUSIC:
SOUND:
MARG.2:
SUZ.2:
SOUND:

MARG.2:

AMEN}.2:

47
did. But you're so little you can see how one
could make a mistake.
I'm twelve, Monsieur.
Oh, I see --- I didn't know. Am I forgiven?
I forgive you, Monsieur.
Good, now where's your father?
In here --- Just tap and go in.
Thank you, Marguerite.
KNOCK ON DOOR
(OFF MIKE) Come in.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

Oh -- he's handsome --- I must get Suzanne ---
Suzanne --- Suzanne -- She must be up stairs
(FADE OUT) I'll run up ---

LIGHT AND FAST. UP AND SEGUE INTO KNOCKING
KNOCKING ON DOOR
Suzanne, Suzanne.
(OFF MIKE) Come in, Margot.

DOOR OPENS

Suzanne -- there's, there's the most handsome --
honestly --- the most wonderful---

(FADING IN) Margot, my little one, don't try to

talk now. (LAUGHING) My how pink you are. Rest

a moment, dear--- don't talk now. Sit here on

the foot stool.

Oh, but, Suzanne, you should see him.

SUZ.2:

MARG.2:

SUZ.2:

MARG.2:

SUZ.2:
MARG.2:

SUZ.2:
MARG.2:

SUZ.8:

MARG.2:

SUZ.2:

48
‘Who, me petite? You haven't stepped long enough
to tell me who HE is.
The man downstairs---the messenger---
Oh, Just a messenger.
Oh, but he's not an ordinary messenger. He's at
least a prince.
(LAUGHING) Oh, what a strange child you are.
Oh, I'm not such a child. I know he's not a
prince, but he is a gentleman and he has on shiny
high boots, and beautiful breaches and a moustache
and ---I love him}
(LAUGHING) New, I know you're a child.
All right laugh --- but you won't laugh so much
when you see him. Come on --let's go sit on the
landing and when he's finished with papa, you shall
see him.as he goes out--but remember, he's mine.
(STILL AMUSED) Oh, all right, we'll go and see
your hero. Come on ---we'll peak through the)
bannisters Just like we used to. We'll pretend
we're spies.
Oh, Suzanne, stop treating me as if I were a baby.
I don't play games like that any more and remember,
you're not the only one around here who's going
to have beaux.
All right --- don't get upset. Here we can see

from.here.

_ .-__ fl"

MARG.2:

FATHER:

MARG.2:
SUZ.2:

MUSIC :

SOUND

CROWD
SUZ . 2 :

49
Shhh --- here they come.
(VOICES OFF MIKE FADE IN AND OUT)
Well, that's good news, Henry, and now you must

stay to dinner. I have two charming daughters

‘ you know---

That's kind of you, sir-- Yes, I met one of them.
You see? And he's going to stay. Oh, Suzanne.
He is handsome, Margot, he's) Just about the most
handsome (FADE OUI') man I ever saw, I can hardly
wait to meet him at dinner (FADE) tonight.

LIGHT AND DREAMY. UP AND SEGUE INTO TABLE SOUNDS
AND LAUGHER '

KNIVES AND FORKS AND CHINA RATTLING

LAUGHTER AND TALKING

Oh, Monsieur Henri, where do you hear all that
gossip and such tales?

Ah --that's my secret, mademoiselle, but how is
it, Mademoiselle Suzanne, that we've never met
before when I came to see your father?

(LAUGHING) Oh, Monsieur, I've only Just grown up!
Oh, behold --overnight-- like a lovely flower,
eh?

Monsieur, you flatter me.

Not at all, but I see we have another flower about

to blossom. Mademoiselle Marguerite, how is it

you 're not eating?

MARG.2:

MARG.2:

MARG.2:
SUZ.2:

50
I'm not hungry, Monsieur.
Oh, come, that's no way to grow beautiful like
your sister.
I'm not going to be like her...or like anyone else
...Just myself.
(LAUGHING) That's the way to be and that will
make the young men buzz, eh? But 'til you grow
up, may I come and call on your sister often?
I don't care.
Why, Margot, that's no way to act. Of course we
ALL want to see you, Monsieur.
But you perhaps will want to see me a bit more
than the rest? Please say ”yes"!
Perhaps --- but, Monsieur, I (FADE OUT) hardly
know you.
You remember that, Suzanne? What you can't
remember because you didn't know was that every
time he came after that I loved him more. I
thought of nothing but him. I was big for my
age and far more sephisticated than people
supposed. I used to repeat very softly, "Henry
...Henry de Sampierre." He used to come every
afternoon after lunch, you remember, don't you?
Don't speak...listen. You made him cakes, of
which he was very fond...with flour and butter

and milk. Oh, I knew Just how you made them...

SUZ.2:

MARG.1:

MARG.2:

mammal:

51
I could make them this minute if I had to. He
would swallow them.in a single mouthful and then
he would toss down a glass of wine and say (FAD-
ING OUT)
These are delicious. My dear, you can please me
in every way. Tell me, do I please you? Oh,
don't look away. May I speak to your father,
Suzanne? May I.
Oh, yes, please do... immediately. Henry (FADE
OUT) I have....
You remember-~but you don't remember as well as
I do. That moment has haunted me day and night
for forty years. Oh, you didn't know I was there,
but I was outside on the terrace listening and I
ran away into the garden for fear you'd hear my
sobs. I hid there under the olive trees and
(FADE OUT) cried and cried-
(SOBBING) He shall not marry. Suzanne, no, I
won't have it. It is I who will marry him. when
I am grown up. I shall never find a man I love
so much ---- (FADE)
(FADING IN) While I was sitting there, crying,
the old gardener came. I saw him.putting out
meat filled with ground glass to kill the wild
dogs. That gave me~an idea----I was Jealous,

Jealous...The day of your wedding was drawing

MARG.2:

MARG.1:

SOUND
MARG.2:

SOUND:
IHARG.2:

NUUTG.2:

52
near. Finally, there was only one fortnight
left. I was going mad. And-- then-- that even-
ing, ten days before the wedding when you went
out with him to walk in the moonlight and--out
there--under the pine tree, the big pine tree--
he kissed you-~held you in his arms. I saw‘youg‘
I was there in the c0pse. I grew wild with rage.
If I could have done it, I would have killed
you both right then. (FADE OUT) I was mad -----
He shall not marry Suzanne, never! He shall not
marry anyone--- (SOBS) I should be too unhappy
--- Oh --- I hate him --- I hate him. (PAUSE)

I know what I shall do--- (FADE OUT) I shall...
kill him.

And...the next day when you were making his
favorite cakes... I went up to mother's room
(FADE OUT)

FADE IN SOUND OF HAMMERING ON GLASS.

I hate him.---I hate him -- He shall not do it--
not-~ever.. I'll kill him as if he were a wild
dog:

HAMMERING OUT

Now -- that's done -- I have a nice little sack
of ground glass -- and now I'll go down to the
kitchen and help Suzanne --- (FADE OUT) Suzanne.
(FADING IN) May I help, sister?

SUZ.2:

MARG.2:
SUZ.2:
MARG.2:

MARG.1

SUZ.2:
MARG.2:

53
Oh, Margot, dear, yes —-— these are ready to go
in the oven. Will you get them.in and watch them.
It only takes a little while you know and I want
to speak to Henry.
Yes, go on --- I'll do it.
You're a dear (FADE OUT) Don't let them burn.
(SARCASTICALLY) Don't worry, pretty, I won't let
them.burn3 Now -- Just a slit with the knife and
a few pieces of glass...there...there...Just a
bit more --- all finished and now into the oven

--- (FADE OUT) Oh ---they'll be good ---

(FADE IN) He ate three of them and I too ate one...

I threw the other six into the pond...then two
swans died three days later...Don't speak...
listen, listen. I was the only one who did not
die...but I have always been ill...listen... He
...died...you...know, listen...that was nothing.
It was afterwards, later...you were so unhappy
...YOu swore you'd never marry...you put on
widow's clothes...and see...see...you're still
wearing them...it was when I saw your grief...
I came to a decision...remember...one morning I
came into the room (FADE OUT) I came in and
you were crying...
(FADE IN) (CRYING)
(FADE IN) Sister, sister--- Oh, Suzanne ---

SUZ.2:

MARG.1:

54
don't cry-- (BEGINS TO CRY) Sister, I don't
want you to be unhappy. I don't want you to cry
all your life long. I'll never leave you, never,
never! I won't marry either. I will stay with
you forever and ever.

Margot, my darling, you're sweet, but you're a
child yet. (FADE OUT) Some day---

(FADE IN) Yen didn't believe me at all...but I
kept my word...you begged and papa and mama
begged, but I never married any of those young
men that used to come and call --- I hated them,
too. You've thought... you've thought that 1--
was noble 7- because I gave up my life to you...
but now you know... I stole your real life from
you... my life... my whole life... what torture!
I said to myself, I will never leave my sister.
And I will tell her all, in the hour of my death.
There... And since then I have thought of this
hour every moment, this hour when I should have
to tell you all... now it has come... it is
terrible... Oh, sister... It is done... Do not
say anything... Now I am afraid... I'm afraid...
If I were to see him.again, presently, when I am
dead... See him.before you do... Oh, I'm afraid
... I shall not dare... I must, I'm.going to

die... I want you to forgive me... I want you

 

kw“—

 

SUZ.l:

SIM:
SUZ.l:

MUSIC:

55
to...without it, I cannot come into his presence.
Oh, tell her to forgive me, Father, tell her...
I beg you. I cannot die without it...

But -- but -- I thought it was Just for me! And
-- and -- I might have loved him.ao long! Oh,
what a happy life we'd have had. And that kiss
--- the only kiss!! And then nothing more --
nothing:more in all my life! Forgive? Forgive
you for all --- O
Mademoiselle Suzanne, your sister is dying!

Oh, Margot, little one, I forgive you, I forgive
you -- don't be afrdid...

TRIUMPHAL MUSIC. HAS SNEAKED IN UNDER AND NOW
CRESCENDOES AND OUT

STOCK CLOSING ........

56
Notes on the Adaptation and the

Production of de Maupassant's
The Confessigp

Reasons for Adaptation

It was logical that the next adaptation should be one of
de.Maupassant's works because many critics say that de
Maupassant was to France what Poe was to America in the
realm.of short story literature. The Confession is little
known to radio, yet, it is typical of de Maupassant's rather
morbid style and, so, was my choice.

The story was not difficult to adapt but lent itself
admirably to the “flash-back" method, having originally
been written in that style anyway. The flash-back is very
effective in radio and the irony of the story would really
have been lost if this method had been abandoned in the
adaptation.

However, the transitions from.scene to scene demanded
careful'working-out to make them seem.natural and consistent.
Too, it was necessary to make the rather stilted form of
conversation seem.natural. This, however, depended mostly

upon the playing of the script.

Cgst ing and Act ing
In the casting, it is important to balance the voices

of’the children and adults. Particularly in the adults,
'there is great necessity for contrast because the scenes are

so emotional that there is considerable room.for confusion

57

on.the part of the listener.

In the acting, Marguerite must be very careful not to
be constantly on the verge of death and so tire the
listener. She must, instead, weaken and then rally, weaken
and rally, etc.
some.

The sound pattern here offers no difficulty whatso-

evere

Script Chapges

The changes in the script were of several kinds. First,
there were rewordings of some lines. These were small
changes and consisted of substituting a word or two in a
few sentences to make the construction sound more natural.
Actors will often do this to their own lines in a script
in order to facilitate their portrayal of meaning. Second,
there were additions of phrases here and there to make the
transitions clearer. For instance, between the scene in
which.Margot and Suzanne peer over the stair to see Henry
and the scene at the dinner table, I added the sentence,

"I can hardly wait to meet him at dinner tonight.” This
‘was to make the transition into the dinner scene flow’more
easily. Third, there were cuts in long,unimportant speeches
to facilitate timing and one scene was cut for the same
purpose. The scene which was cut was one in which Margot
actually helped the gardener to crush glass and put it in
meat to kill the wild dogs. However, having her tell about

58
it was Just as effective and enabled the script to confine

itself to the time limit. There was, also, one other change

and that occurred in the scene in whictharg t was crushing
the glass to put in the cookies. It wasn't clear what

she was doing and so the addition of the reference to the
wild dogs and the sack of glass aided in the process of

visualization of action.

WINK:

SOUND :

59
Part of PICKWICK PAPERS
By Charles Dickens
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening 5- --------- Part of Dicken's
Pickwick Papers.
UP AND FADE OUT
Mr. Pickwick was a gentleman of varied interests
and his friends were Just as varied as his
interests. Two things these friends of Pickwick
had in common: their ability to become entangled
in strange events and their membership in. the
Pickwick Club. This is the story of Mr. Winkle,
whom many times Mr. Pickwick had helped out of
the frying-pan and whom we're now going to watch
walk comfortably and gently into a fire, from
which he has no desire to be extricated. We
see him headed toward the flames as he walks
the streets of Bristol seeking lodging for the
night. (FADE OUT)
Eh, blast it--lost again. Confound these wind-
ing streets anyway. Now let me see. I know-"-
I'll find a decent looking shop and st0p there
and ask my way to the Royal Crescent Inn. Hmrmn
----here we are. Looks like the residence of
a medical practitioner, no less. I guess I'll
Just step in.
DOOR OPENS AND BELL J INGLES TO ANNOUNCE HIS

SAW:

WINK:

SAW:

WINK:

SAW:

WINK:
SAW:

60
PRESENCE.
Pfewi! Medicine--—smells to high-heaven.
COIN TAPPING ON GLASS
Is anybody here? I say---
(FADING IN) Yes, sir, and what can I do for
you. Pills, powders---
I'm sorry to trouble you but will you have the
goodness to direct me to----
(LAUGHING) Why, Winkle what brings you here?
Eh?
What, don't you know me?
I believe I have not had the pleasure.
(LAUGHING UPROARIOUSLY) Why, then there are
hepes for me yet. Why-- I may attend half the
old women in Bristol if I've decent luck. Get
out, you.mouldy old villain, get out!
What? I say,sir, I demand---why Bob Sawyer.
Well, you-- imagine.. I didn't recognize you
in those green spectacles-- well, I declare.
(LAUGHING) Fools the customers, old fellow,
fools the customers. But I wonder you didn't
see the name--see there on the door -- "Sawyer,
late Nockenwolf.”
It never caught my eye.
Lord, if I'd known who you were I'd have rushed

out and caught you in my arms--but upon my life,

WINK:
SAW:

WINK:

SAW:

61
I thought you were the Kings Taxes.
No!
I did, indeed, and I was Just about to say that
I wasn't at home but if you'd leave a message
I'd be sure to give it to myself; because the
tax-collector doesn't know me; and no more does
the Lighting and Paving. Come along-~in here
to the back. I think the Church-rates guesses
who I am and I know the watcheworks does,
because I drew a tooth of his when I first came
down here. But come in, come in! Say, Ben,
look who's here.
Upon.my word, BenJamin Allen. This is certain-
ly a pleasure I didn't expect.
(FADING IN) Oh, Winkle---where did you drop
from? Good to see you old fellow. How's
Pickwick? Seen him lately?
‘Well, thank you, well. Just left him.in Bath
as a matter of fact. But he'll be in Bristol
tomorrow. 'Well, nice place you have here, Bob.
Well, it's pretty nice. I passed my exams soon
after the last Pickwick Club party in London
and came on down here and bought out this
doctor's business, put on a black suit and a
pair of spectacles so as to look as solemn as

I could.

 

SAW:

WINK:

SAW:

SAW:

WINK:
SAW:

62
And very solemn you look in them.... I must say.
So solemn I didn't recognize you--4Ha! good one
on me--but you must have a snug little business
here.
Very --- so snug that at the end of a few years
you.might put all the profits in a wine glass
and cover 'em over with a gooseberry leaf.
Ah---you surely can't mean that! Why-~your
stock of medicine. You have whole cabinets
full of drawers all labelled with different
names of drugs. And the bottles on the counter,
what---
All dummies, my dear boy. Half the drawers
have nothing in 'em.and the other half don't
open.
Nonsense.
Fact --- honor! Hardly anything real in the
shop except the leeches and they're second-
hand.
I'd never have thought it.
I hope not -- else what's the use of appear-
ances, eh? But what'll you take, Winkle. Do
as we do? Good--- Ben, my fine fellow, put
your hand into the cupboard and pull out the
patent digester.
Right---don't be afraid, Winkle ---it's really

63
brandy. Here ya go, sir!

WINK: Ah --— good --- are you drinking with me?

SAE: Drinking with you? I should say. Ben's been
with me three weeks now and drunk most of the
time --- and, oh my, he becomes so sentimental.
First thing ya know, Winkle, he'll be crying
on your shoulder. Ah, well, it's good clean
fun. Pour out another. (FADE OUT) Let's
drink a toast.

MUSIC: DRINKING SONG UP AND OUT

ALLEN: (FADING IN) Winkle, my dear friend, while our_
dearest friend, Sawyer, is out of the room,

I must tell you that I am.very miserable.

WINK: I say, old fellow, I'm sorry. Is there any-
thing I can do?

ALLEN: Nothing, my dear boy, nothing --- you recollect
Arabella, Winkle? My sister Arabella --- a
little girl, Winkle, with black eyes. You met
her when we were at Wardles. I don't know
whether you happened to notice her, a nice girl,
Winkle. Perhaps my features may recall her
face to you?

WINK: No, I hardly think so --- but I remember her.
Very well, in fact --- charming, charming.

ALLEN: Yes, charming. Our friend Bob is a delightful

fellow.

WINK:

ALLEN:

EUINK:

££LLENz

EVINK:

AJILEN:

'NIIGK:

ALLEN ;

64
Very --- but I see no connection.
I designed 'em for each other, they were made
for each other, sent into the world for each
other, born for each other. There's a special
destiny in these things, Winkle, dear sir.
There's only five years difference between 'em
and both their birthdays are in August.
Well -- interesting but —-
But, it's a sin, it's a sin, I tell you, but
Arabella doesn't like hbn.
(RELIEVED) OH, is that so?
And I think -- I think there's a prior attach-
ment.
(HAPPILY) No! Uh -- have you any idea who
the object of the prior attachment might be?
I only wish I could guess. I'd show him.what
I thought of him. I'd take this poker and I'd --
Yes, yes, right enough -- and a good thing,
too. But -- uh -- your sister is in Kent then?
No, no. I didn't think Wardles was exactly
the place for a head-strong girl, so -- as I am
her natural protector and guardian, our parents
being dead, I have brought her down into this
part of the country to spend a few months at an
old aunt's, in a nice dull, close place. I

think that will cure her, my boy. If it doesn't

WINK:

WINK:
IMUSIC:
'WINK:

NNEEFJ:
VWINKk

PICK:

PICK ;

WTIHI;

65
I'll take her abroad for a little while and
see what that'll do.
Oh, the aunt's in Bristol, is she?
No, no, not in Bristol --- over that way--
north-- down there -- north.
(FADING OUT) Oh, I see--- down there-—north...
(FAST AND LIGHT) UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) Over that way -- north -- down .
there -- could be three miles off -- or thirty
-- or three hundred. I have it -- I'll ask
Pickwick when he gets here tomorrow -- he
knows how to handle such things. I must see
her (FADE OUT) I must see her -- soon.
(PASSAGE OF TIME STUFF) UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) And you see, Pickwick, I love
Arabella and I thought, that is, I hOped-- I
might be the prior attachment.
I see and you are quite serious and earnest
in respect to this young lady, Winkle?
Serious, from.my heart -- from.my soul!
And he said, "down there." That means on the
Downs. Hmmmmm-- that's not too bad. We'll
send my man, Sam.Weller. He'll find her and
make an appointment and you can see her and
declare yourself.

That's it-- I must declare myself -- but

PICK:

‘ f T‘ f
bmn :

PICK:

MUSIC:

VOICE 1:

SAM:
MUSIC:
VOICE 2:
SAN:
MUSIC:
VOICE l:
VOICE 2:

VOICE 3:
'VOICE 4:
VOICE 2:

MUSIC :

66
secretly. Her aunt is saving her for Bob
Sawyer.

Yes, secretly-- Sam.will arrange it. (CALLING)
Sam-~Sam come here.

(FADING IN) Yes, sir. Coming, Mr. Pickwick.
Now, Sam, we want you to go over the Downs and
get into a conversation with the servants of
the houses there and find out which house
contains a Miss Arabella Allen (FADE OUT) And
then get her to agree to an interview with Mr.
Winkle.

FAST AND LIGHT UP AND HOLD UNDER

(FADE IN) Arabella Allen -- no one in the
master's house by that name.

(FADE OUT) Just thought I'd ask.

UP 2" AND UNDER

(FADE IN) No one in my house by that name.
(FADE OUT) Well, I'll try another house.

UP 2" AND UNDER

(FADE IN) No -- not here.

(FADE IN) Not Allen -- we have a (FADE OUT)
Daisy Brown.

(FADE IN) No young ladies here.

No!

No:

UP AND DOWN UNDER

VOICE 5:
MUSIC:
SAM:

PICK:

WINK:

PICK:

PICK:

PICK:

67
Arabella Allen? --- sure next door.
UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) And she'll be walkin' in the garden
alone tomorrow evenin', Mr. Pickwick, -- after
dark.
we must be careful, Winkle -- not for our sakes,
but for that of the young lady. 'We must be
very cautious.
WE?
WE, sir. I shall accompany you.
YOU!
I. In affording you this interview, the young
lady has taken a natural, perhaps, but still
very imprudent step. If I am.present at the
meeting,a mutual friend, who is old enough to
be the father of both parties, the voice of
scandal can never be raised against her here-
after.
Ybu shall go.
I shall (FADE OUT) Sam.have my shawl -----
(OMINOUS) UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) Here we are gentlemen -- right down
this lane.
Ah, Just a moment, I brought a dark lantern.
Ah -- there -- helps, eh?

Let's hurry.

PICK:

PICK :
SAM :

PICK:

SAM:

PICK :

PICK:

PICK:

68
I'd have been the better for a dark lantern my
last garden expedition, eh, Sam?
Very nice things if they're managed prOperly,
sir, but when you don't want to be seen, I think
they're more useful after the candle's gone out,
than wen it's alight.
Umm -- perhaps I'd best put it away for a bit.
Here we are by the wall. There, I hear the young
lady, Mr. Winkle. Now, up with you, sir.
Stop, step. I must speak to the lady first.
Help me up, Sam.
Gently, Mr. Pickwick. I'll place me head against
the wall and you step on that 'ere flower-pot,
air, and now on my back and (STRAINING) up we
go.
I'm afraid I shall hurt you, Sam.
Never mind me, sir. Can you see now, Sir?
Yes. My dear, don't be frightened, it's only
me.
(OFF MIKE) Oh, pray go away, Mr. Pickwick.
Tell them all to go away. I'm so dreadfully
frightened. Dear, dear, Mr. Pickwick, don't
step there, you'll fall down and kill yourself,
I know you will.
I merely wish you to know, my clear, that I am
here and you are properly chaperoned and need

have no fear of imprOpriety.

SOUND:
PICK:
SAM:

PICK:
SAM:

PICK :

SAM:

MUSIC :
SAW :

69
Oh, Mr. Pickwick, I'm very much obliged to you
...... Mr. Pickwick.
GRUNTS AND THUDS.
Oh, (GROANS) where am I now?
Are you all right, air? You took a false step
and ---- .
Yes, yes, now I'm all right. Where's Winkle?
Mr. Winkle Jumped over the wall -- he was that
anxious, sir!
Good, good. Now I'll go down to the end of the
lane and watch. Eh-- what's that.
Someone's coming, sir. It's that lamp. It's
going again, sir. The shutter slipped. Mr.
Winkle -- Mr. Winkle.
I'm coming --- I'm coming.
(OFF MIKE) Run, sir. Come on quick, quick
(FADE OUT) this way --- down the lane.
(FAST AND TRIUMPHANT) UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) And everything is quite all right,
my dear Pickwick, quite all right -- yes, indeed
(FADE OUT) Thank you very much, very much
indeed.
(TRIUMPHANT) UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) It's wonderful how the poor peeple
patronize me, Ben. They wake me at all hours of

the night. They take medicine to an extent

ALLEN:

SAW 3

ALLEN:

ALLEN:
SAW:

ALLEN:

SOUND:

SAW:

ALLEN:
PICK:

70
which I'd never have thought possible; they
make additions to their families right and left.
Six of those last named little promissory notes,
all due on the same day, Ben, and all entrusted
to me.

It's very gratifying, isn't it?

Oh, very, only not quite so much so, as the
confidence of patients with a shilling or two
to spare, would be. This business was well
described in the advertisement, Ben.

How's that?

It's a practice, a very extensive practice and
that's all.

Bob -- Bob, you must make yourself, with as
little delay as possible, master of Arabella's
100 pounds.

But how?

By making yourself master of her.

But she doesn't like me.

We'll see to that. I'll exert my influence
this very day.

DOOR OPENS ... BELLS JINGLE

Oh--it's Mr. Pickwick-- Well, we're glad to
see you, sir, how are you?

Hello, Pickwick----

(FADING IN) Good day, gentlemen. Glad to see

PICK:
SAW:

SOUND:

ALLEN:

AUNT:

ALLEN:

SAW:

AUNT:

ALLEN:

AUNT:
ALLEN:

AUNT:

SAW:

PICK:

71
you, too. Have you heard the news?
News?
About your sister, Allen.
We were Just talking about her. ‘We have plans.
You see, Mr. Pickwick ------
DOOR OPENS HURRIEDLY......BELLS JINGLE
Aunt----
Ben----Ben----the most awful thing has happened--
Sit down, Aunt-- you're all upset.
I prescribe camphor---Julep and water three
times a day.
Ben---my niece, your sister, left my house three
days ago on a pretended visit to my sister and---
And she won't come back I suppose---Never:mind--
I have plans for her anyway---
But you don't understand---this morning---
Oh, she did come back, eh? Well, so much the
better. I want to see her---
She did not come back. She wrote and explained--
well---in short----that she was married.
What? Bolted? I'll get my hands on the rascal
who took her---Just you.wait---where's my hat?
I shall challenge him.to a duel---why the no
good-~-
Before you go further, gentlemen, I believe I'd

best explain I had a hand in this and her

SAW:
ALLEN:

PICK:

SAW:

PICK:

PICK:

SAW:

MUSIC:

72
husband is a friend of mine and I should hate

to hear him.aalled names.

Who is it?

Mr. Nathaniel'Winkle---and I helped.them elOpe--
come, now, you don't hold it against us do you?
In case you don't, I brought along a slight
bottle of spirits-~thought we'd drink to their
health--have some?

'What kind is it? Hmmm--good stuff--pour some
out, sir---

Sure there are no grudges? This is good, you”
knowb-I shouldn't like to drink it, however, if
there were hard feelings.

Well, seeing how it is then, sir---(BRIGHTENING)
I don't mind if we do---Ah---looks fine--

Don't gulp it so, gentlemen---I prOpose a toast
to the newlyweds.

V-

Oh, yes---to the newlyweds.

TRIUMPHANT UP AND OUT
Stock Closing.

Notes on the Adaptation and the Production
of part of Dicken's Pickwick Paners

 

Reasons for Adaptation

 

Dickens had great influence on short story writers
all over the world, though he wrote novels, mainly.. His
series of short stories incorporated in The Pickwick Papers
has influenced the short story style of many of his suc—
cessors. Because of this, I chose to adapt a part of this
famous work.

Adaptation Problems

The writing of this script was difficult because the
story told here was woven in and out of three chapters in
the book. It was necessary to eliminate much interesting
but irrelevant detail, which would have added vastly to
the amusement provided by the script, but which would have
added nothing to the dramatic action. However, it was
important to retain the flavor of the characters and their
time and, so, the process of selecting descriptive detail
and colorful language to be retained was a difficult one.
Casting_and Acting

In casting, it is highly important to avoid.British
accents which are too thick to be readily understood, as
a great deal of the script depends upon rapid pacing. Sam
Weller could be played in any British dialect, though

Yorkshire is preferable.

74

In the acting, the important problem.was to make the
exposition, necessarily included in the conversation, sound
natural, rather than like pure exposition. One of the most
vital things in the acting of this script, from.the tech-
nical angle, is the matter of perspective. In the montage
scene where Sam is searching for Arabella, preper fades
are of the utmost importance to the timing. The timing is,
of course, the suspense-mechanism. In this scene, too,
the voices must build in pitch, with the musical background,
to a climax. The whole scene has to be very rapid.

Another scene where perspective demands great care is
that of the clandestine interview between Arabella and
Winkle. Here the perspective is very vital to the visual-
ization of the dramatic action.
mum

The sound pattern in this script is easy but the music
demands very precise timing. This is particularly true in
the montage scene where Sam.seeks Arabella. This scene
depends on the timing of the music fades in and out for all
of its effect. Done correctly it is one of the most effect-
ive scenes in this series. I discovered that a passage of
‘Victoriflerbert's Badinage fits the scene perfectly. It
crescendoes in all of the right places, so that the music
can.be faded up on a crescendo each tnme and the dialogue
ends Just before the big crescendo about the middle of the

jpiece. Of course, the lines must be paced exactly the same

75

in actual production as in rehearsal to fit the music,
but, if the timing of the music fades is off, the whole
effect is lost.
Sexist Changes

There were few script changes before the last scene.
What there were were for the purpose of making the dialogue
more conversational and consisted of a mere addition of a
word here and there. The last scene, as it was first
written, proved in the playing to be very weak. In it the
aunt came in and falteringly told the story of the e10p-
ment and then Mr. Pickwick arrived and had, supposedly, to
have the whole thing explained to him. The scene lagged
and lacked vitality. Consequently, it was rewritten with
Mr. Pickwick coming in first and the aunt's explanation
being much reduced. The rewritten scene still stands and

is dramatically much stronger than the first.

ANN:

MUSIC:

ANN:

76
FIGHT AT THE KILL
By Emile Zola
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening ---- Emile Zola's --- Egght_At
The Mill —--
UP AND FADE TO BC

In the year of 1870 the Emperor of France
declared war against Prussia. Men marched off
to the war leaving their friends smiling happily
at home. Why smiles when men march off to war?
Because the Prussians were in for a good lick-
ing and in short order, it was comfortably .
remarked on every side. PeOple laughed at the
thought that France would ever feel the tread of

enemy boots. Even in the province of Lorraine,
so close to the enemy territory, men were gay
and feasted as pleasantly as always, though their
country was at war, convinced that they were
safe. The village of Rocreuse, Lorraine was a
picturesque little town on the banks of the
Norelle River on the edge of the beautiful
Gagny woods. Rocreuse was noted for two things
-- the loveliness and fertility of the surround-
ing land and the wisdom.of its Mayor, Old
Father Nerlier. Old Father herlier was the

town's miller. Late in the summer of this year

SOUND:
MERL:

SOUND:

MERL:

SOUND:

VOICE I:

VOICE II:

VOICEI:

IWERL:

77
of which we speak, Rocreuse was particularly
Joyful because old Father Merlier, was giving
a feast under the century old elm.trees that
stood in the yard of his mill......(FADE OUT)
CROWD NOISES OF LAUGHTER AND EATING FADE IN
(FADING IN) Friends, friends--- (CROWD NOISES
SUBSIDE) you have all wonderedxvhy I invited
you to my mill this evening to drink and be
happy with me... (CROWD NOISES OF MURMURS
AND LAUGH) I have the pleasure of announcing
to you that my little daughter, Francoise, will
be married to this good fellow, Dominique, in
a month from.today---on the feast of St. Louis.
CLINKING OF GLASSES AND CROWD LAUGHTER AND TALK
. . .HOLD UNDER FOLLOWING I
Dominique, kiss your fiancee: Come, come, must
be done:
CROWD LAUGHTER AND TALK
Look how red they are.
They act as if they'd never kissed before.
.Ah... but they've adored each other for so long
...the whole village knew. They are a good pair.
Come on friends -- drink and make yourselves
happy...we must celebrate.
CROWD NOISES UP ANDFADE UNDER
Well, old friend Gagnol, what do you think of

GAGz’

GAG:

GAG:

MUSIC:

DOM:

78
my little daughter being so grown up as to be
engaged?
It is good, it is good, Monsieur Merlier.
Dominique is a fine lad. But is this a good
time? We are at war.
True, it is sad--but life must go on.
I knowe4but what I mean is, all our village boys
are gone now, Troops passed by last night and
there'll be hard fighting. Won't Dominique have
to leave her soon?
Bah: Dominique is a stranger here. He is from
Belgium, you know, he will not have to go. And
then if the Prussians come, he will be here to
defend his wife.
(LAUGHING) Ah-- if the Prussians come here: I
didn't mean to sound that serious. We shall
never see them here. They'll be licked well and
in short order. Pah: the Prussians, indeed.
(GAY)~ UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) Well, Dominique, it is over. I thought
father would never get around to telling us when
we could be married. A
I felt the same way. (All these weeks since he
brought me here to help him at the mill he has

never said he approved of our love.

DOM :
FRAN:

DOM :
FRAN:

DOM :
FRAN:

DOM :

FRAN:

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FRAN:

79
He didn't, at first, of course.
I know.
We had several weeks of sulking at each other
before he went and brought you here. He thought
you were lazy, lying in the sun so much by your
little old hut, instead of tending your garden.
I tended it.
I know you did, but not all the time. Father
works all the time. Oh--well--after you came
to help you've worked steadily. The whole
village marvels at you.
Do you?
(LAUGHING) I always knew you were industrious.
You Just lived differently fromjmost of our
villagers.
Then you approve of me?
Of course, silly, would I be marrying you if I
didn't?
I don't know. Sometimes you look at me with
those black eyes of yours, and I don't know what
you're thinking. Black eyes are hard to read.
Blue eyes aren't. I can read yours right now.
0h...ho..a sorcerer, eh? “Well, Miss, what am
I thinking, if you know so much?
'Ybu're thinking that it's a long time 'til the

feast of St. Louis.

 

DOM:

MUSIC:

VOICE l:
VOICE 2:
VOICE 3:
VOICE 1:
ANN:

SOUND:

(IAPT:

80
(LAUGHING) Ah, how right you are--how right.
(FADE OUT)
(GAY) UP AND OUT
But Just a month later, to the day, on the very
eve of St. Louis, Rocreuse was terror-stricken.
The Prussians had beaten the Emperor and were
advancing by forced marches upon the village.
For more than a week peOple passing along the
road had been announcing the coming of the
Prussians.
They're at Lormiere:
They're at Nouyelle!
They're at Croix!
They'll be here soon:
They were coming so fast: Every morning the
Rocreuse folks expected to see the Prussians
descending from.the Gagny Whods. And then on
this day a French detachment entered the village.
MARCHING MEN UP
The captain at once asked for the mayor of the
village and remained in the mill forma long
time with old Merlier. (FADE OUT)
(FADING IN) {Ah-- Monsieur, this is a regular
fortress of yours. We can hold our own well
until evening.... Hmmm--the bandits are late.
They ought to have been here already.
You will give battle then?

CAPT:

CAPT:

MERL:

CAPT:

MERL:

CAPT:

CAPT:

81
Indeed, yes, I shall station my men behind walls
and in the trees and in the edge of the wood.
It is an excellent defense, don't you think?
Yes, yes, of course.
I see you are worried about your fine mill,
Monsieur. Well, this is a bad business---but it
must be done.
Of course. ‘You ought to have your man hide
that little boat behind the mill wheel there by
the building. There is a little hole there it
fits into. Perhaps, it might be of use later.
Some men could hide in it and slip from there
down to the river and escape, in case you don't
hold the mill.
Excellent, excellent, thank you, Monsieur. It
will be done. Well, sir, my men are enJoying
your yard.
Yes, it is pleasant here -- with the water so
near.
An excellent fortress here. Yes, indeed --
good defense. We can put men on the third floor
of the mill and they can fire down on the
Prussians as they enter the yard.
Then you are certain of defeat.

Yes, I'm.afraid so. {We're only trying to delay

them.until our main army is reinforced.

CAPT:

CAPT:

MERL:

CAPT:

82

.I see. Well, if you're going to put men up-

stairs, I can show you a means of letting them
escape at the last moment. Come here...around to
this side of the building.

Yes--by all means.

You see, this wall is covered with ivy, but if
you look closely, you will see among the leaves
an iron ladder. It used to lead from the wheel
to the granary but now since we have made liv-
ing quarters of the upstairs it is no longer
used. Still, it might be of use to your man.
Good, good. It will be of use...

It now leads to my daughter's room.and you per-
haps will post men at her window,

Yes, and what is the roam directly beneath in
the second story?

It is Just a store-room...nothing much in it.

I see -- thank you, Monsieur Merlier. Ybu are
a great help.

For my country, Captain.

Yes, of course. Then that little black haired
girl is your daughter?

Yes.

She is lovely--- a bit too small perhaps...but
very charming. Who is the tall blonde lad who

follows her about so constantly?

MERL:

CAPT:

MERL:

FRAN:

MERL:

CAPT:

DOM:

CAPT:
DOM:

CAPT:
MUSIC:
ANN:

83
Her fiance. They were to have been married
tomorrow.
Too bad...too bad... Hmm, here they come. Are
they never apart?
(LAUGHING) Not lately-; Well, my children, why
look so sad?
(FADING IN) Father, the soldiers say there'll
be a battle.
Yes, poor children, and it is not tomorrow that
I shall marry you. One must be patient these
days, eh, Captain?
True. So-- you are not in the army, my lad?
I am.a stranger.
Oh -- I see!
I am.a stranger; but I can lodge a ball in an
apple at five hundred meters. See, there is my
hunting rifle behind you.
You can find use for it.
(THUNDEROUS WAR MOOD) UP AND FADE OUT
.And Dominique did. From.lO:OO that morning
until 6:00 that night when the Captain consented
to withdraw with his 10 remaining men. The mill
was under constant bombardment. The great elms
in the yard were cut down and old.Merlier risked
his life every instant checking on the damage
done to his mill. He wept when the old mill-wheel

FRAN
COM:

DOM:
COM:
DOM :
COM:
DOM:

84
was destroyed and Francoise wept over the soldiers
wounds and covered those who were killed, but
most of all she worried about Dominique who never
left his post, though a ball touched his shoulder
and another bruised his arm. Long after the
French had left he was still firing on the advanc-
ing Prussians and when the conquerors entered the
mill he was standing wdth his rifle.smoking....
He was seized and taken to the Prussian Comman-
dant. (FADE OUT)
So--- you do not deny that you fired?
I fired Just as much as I could.
You are a native of this country?
No, I am.a Belgian.
‘Why did you take up arms? All this ought not to
concern you. Why don't you answer? (PAUSE) Oh
-- I see -- the girl. Well, you shall be shot
in two hours.
Oh, no.
Why not? He is no good to us. Wait-- are you
well acquainted with the neighboring woods?
Of course.
What is the name of those woods?
The Sauval.
And how far do they extend?
I do not know.

COM:

DOM 1 '

COLI:

SER:
COR: :

SER:
MUS IC 3
SOUND :

LFRAN:
D OM 2
IVRAN:

DOM :

I?£UMM

l f-_ I. ’— A “—4—!

IDth
I?PMUN:

Dom :

85
You do not know}: Don't take me for a fool!
Think it over. If you will lead us through
the woods you can come back to your wife here.
No.
Think it over... I will give you until tomorrow
morning. In the meantime -- Sergeant.
Yes, sir.
Confine this man to that store-room on the
second floor and guard him.
Yes, sir. (FADE OUT) Come along.
(OMINOUS) UP AND OUT
PEBBLES BEING THROWN AGAINST WALL
(OFF MIKE) (WHISPERING) Dominique, oh, quickly -
-- I shall fall ---
Francoise, where are you?
Here-- take me, quick-- I'm falling.
Oh -- give me your hand. Hang on with one --
uhhh -- there now up -- here you are -- inside.
(CRYING) Oh -- I thought I'd drop into the water.
below. I grabbed plaster from the walls and threw
at your window, but you didn't hear.
How did you get here?
By that old ladder that leads from my room to the
store-room --- but, oh, I was so afraid.
Be quiet, my dear. Here put your head against'

me -- there -- now-- 'Oh, how you frightened me!

FRAN:

DOM:

FRAN:

DOM:

FRAN:

86
You might have been killed. How I love you,
Francoise: I had only one fear. I was afraid I
should die without being able to see you again.
But you're here: and now they can shoot me.
When I have passed a quarter of an hour with you
I shall be ready. Come, let's sit down on this
bench.
Are you guarded?
Yes, but he's asleep. Come here, lean against
me. Do you know-- today is our wedding day?
Nothing could separate us -- we are here alone --
this is our wedding morning.
Yes-- our wedding morning. I love you, Dominique.
Oh, but you must go. Ybu.must escape...we're
'wasting time---you must go.
Francoise, my dear, don't talk of it, there's no
way. Besides, I don't want to run away like a
coward.
0h -- listen to me. If you die, I'll die. In
one more hour it will be day. You.must go....
I'm begging you. The iron ladder I came down
on, descends to the mill wheel.... Beneath the
wheel is that little boat father hid for the
French soldiers to use. YOu can get in and drift
into the river and then to the other side and

escape into the woods.

DOM :

DOM:

DOM:

FRAN

DOM :

FRAN:
DOM :

MUSIC:
SOUND:
VOICE l:

87
But there must be sentries.
Only one, on the opposite bank, at the foot of
the first willow... You can see him in the moon-
light.
He may see me, too. If he should and if he should
give the alarm--
Kill him.-- here is a knife...I brought..;' It is
sharp. It is the one Father butchers with.
What about you and your father? No -- I can't go.
Perhaps when I am gone they'll massacre you —-
they have to make an example of someone --- they
want me as a guide and when they find me gone --
they may do anything.
If you love me go--- if you lave me don't stay
here one moment longer. And when you're gone I'll
climb back to my room.and they'll never KnOW’I
helped you.
Swear to me that your father knows what you're
doing and wants me to go.
It was my father sent me to you.
Very well -- I'll do as you please. Remember --
I'll be back if I get through. I love you (FADE
OUT) Be careful.
(HEAVY OMINOUS) UP AND OUT
CROWD NOISES... MENS VOICES... ANGRY... SHOUTING.

They killed our sentry.

VOICE 2:
VOICE 3:
COM:

MERL:

COM:

MERL:

SOLD:

SOUND:

COM:

88
Some one from the town sneaked up on him.
It is a crime... they'll pay.
(FADING IN) Stand away. You.see, Monsieur --
here is one of our'men murdered by the river-
bank. We must make a severe example, and I
eXpect you and your daughter to aid us in dis-
covering the murderer. '
Whatever you wish. Only it will not be easy.
Look at this knife-- perhaps it will aid us in
our investigations.
(PAUSE) Everybody has that kind of knife in.
this part of the country.
(FADING IN) Commandant, Commandant, the prison-
er has escaped...
CROWD NOISES KEEP UNDER
Imbecile: He spoils everything.. Francoise,
now we are in a nice fix. on -- everything is
spoiled. They'd not have killed him. No one
does that sort of thing -- even.Prussians.
(FADING IN) Either you or your daughter aided
his escape -- you must give him up --- you know
where he is.
How could one find a man in that woods.
If you don't tell us, I shall shoot you instead.
Sergeant get your platton.

So -- this is serious? Ybu really would do such

FRAN:

MERL:

FRAN:
COM:

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89
a thing? Well, I'd not have thought it possible
--- but I am willing, quite willing. If you
must absolutely shoot someone, Just as well shoot
me as anybody else.
Don't kill him--- I helped Dominique escape. I
climbed down from my window to his and begged him
to escape.
She's mad -- don't listen to her. She's telling
you a lot of stupid lies...
No.
I only take your father because I have not the
other man. Find him.and I will let your father go.
Choose -- either he or your father. You could
find him.
How could I choose -- I'd rather die myself. Kill
me, I pray you, I beg you, kill me ...
Enough of this. I'll give you two hours. If in
two hours your lover is not here, your father
shall pay for him.
Oh -- I can't --- I can't -- (FADE OUT)
(SAD) UP AND OUT
CANNON IN DISTANCE -- GETS LOUDER AS TIME GOES BY"
The two hours are over. Have you found him?
I didn't look -- Listen, sir! One hour, one hour
more -- you can surely give us one hour! _

I know what you're thinking. The French will come

SOUND:
VOICE l:

FRAN:
DOM:

FRAN:

SOUND:

Dam:

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90
and save you. I hear their cannon, too. They-
're coming alright, but not in time to help you.
GUNFIRE NEARER AND LOUDER
Look -- the man is returning
Dominique, coming back?

(FADING IN) This is bad, Francoise, why didn't
you come and bring me back. You could have found
me in the woods. Father Boutemps finally did---
but it should have been you.

I thought they'd give me more time and we'd be
saved.

SHOTS NEARER

Well, I am.here.

Call the platoon, Sergeant, quickly -- the French
are nearing.

SHOTS CLOSE BY -- CROWD NOISES -- CONFUSION

The French -- the French

A detachment slipped up on us. Quickly to your
posts. Sergeant, take this man out in back and
kill him yourself -- to your posts man!

No --- no --- don't kill him.

Francoise, don't look. ---

A SINGLE GUN-FIRE FAIRLY CLOSE TO MIKE

Oh -- there -- they did it. He's dead. Father

he's ... Father -- Father -- what's happened? Ybu

too -- dead: It can't be: (SOBS)

MUSIC:
ANN:

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MUSIC:

91
(CRASHING) UP AND DOWN UNDER
Standing there a French bullet had killed old
Merlier and he fell at his daughter's feet. Hours
later when the French had exterminated the
Prussians and the mill was burning, the French
Captain entered first into the yard. It was his
first success since the beginning of the campaign
and seeing Francoise standing alone in the middle
of the yard (FADE OUT) he approached her.
(FADING IN) Ah -- Mademoiselle, it is good to
see you again. I salute you with my sword, charm-
ing lady. To victory, to victory. It is sweet,
isn't it?
UP AND OUT

Stock Closing.

92

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Zola's The Fight at the Mill

Reasons for Adaptation

Zola was one of the greatest of all French writers.
He unsparingly set down the realistic details of his time.
This realism produced profound effects upon writers in
England and America, as well as France. Furthermore, he was
a consumate story-teller and I chose this story because it
is not too realistic for radio, yet it is typical of Zola
in plot and characterization and, most of all, it is timely.
Adaptatipn.Probleg§

The adaptation of this story was difficult because the
story itself was long and involved and the adaptation had
to condense much that had happened before and much of the
description of action, which did not immediately concern
the characters, but was taking place about them. This con-
densation was accomplished in part by the use of a narrator
but much of it was done through the sacrifice of atmospheric
detail.
gaggingand Acting

Francoise must be a strong lead ingenue since she has
to dominate all the rest of the characters in the last half
of the script. Not all ingenues can sound young and.womanly
and authoritative at the same time, so care must be taken in

casting the part.

93

As for the acting, there are no great difficulties
here but it is best to play the French roles straight, since
the action is laid in France, and play the Prussian roles
with dialect... One thing to stress in directing the act-
ing is emphasis on the description of the means of escape
in the scene between Father'Merlier and the Captain. In
the secret meeting between Francoise and her lover, watch
perspective. The action is intricate to portray and per—
epective helps a great deal.

I should suggest that the micrOphone be with Dominique
and that Francoise be off-mike calling for help and fade
in as he pulls her through the window.
same

The only sound problems are the battle effects and,
there, it is the perspective of the sounds, rather than the
production of them.that is difficult. The gun-fire must
fade in more loudly periodically throughout the scene where
Dominique returns and is shot. The listener must be made
to realize that the battle is getting nearer, so that when
the French actually arrive it will not come as too great a

surprise.

Script Changes
Because the story had to be so drastically condensed,

the script, upon completion, was so compact that it would

have been impossible to delete any lines or scenes without

94
detracting from the thread of the plot. Thus, the only
changes made were in wordings and these were for the purpose

of simplification.

ANN:

MUSIC:

ANN:

DR:

NUT:

DR:

DR:

DR:

111
OPEN WINDOW
By Saki (H. H. Munro)
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening --- Saki's --- The Open Window
THEME UP AND OUT
In a fashionable doctor's office in London, we
find a rather pale young man waiting rather
nervously for his appointment. Soon (FADING)
the door Opens.
Come in, Mr. Nuttel.
Thank you, Doctor. Did you find out what's
wrong with me, Doctor? ‘
Well, Nuttel, after going over the tests I made
on you I find that there's nothing wrong with
you except that --- well, your nerves are
shot --- overwork I imagine and you'll have
to knock off for a bit.
Knock off? 'Why that's impossible. I know Iim
a sick man but ---
Sorry -- but you must. Go out in the country
and get a rest. Do nothing but enJoy yourself.
Forget about business altogether.
Go to the country -- absurd -- I couldn't
possibly leave the city. Why, what would I do
in the country - with no doctors around?

(FADING) Now, now, Nuttel, it will do you good.

MUSIC:
SOUND:

SIS:

NUT:

SIS:

NUT:

112
UP AND OUT
DOOR OPENS AND SHUTS
(FADING IN) Hello, Sis. (SADLY) How are you?
Well, Framton, what did you find out?
Oh, simply that I need a nerve cure.
Hmmmmm -- I wouldn't doubt it. Well, what are
you going to do?
Do? Why -- go to the country I suppose. Seems
work and the city are too strenuous for your
little brother. I'm to have complete rest, an
absence of’mental excitement and an avoidance
of anything in the nature of violent physical .
exercise. So -- I suppose the country is the
place.
Well, I know Just the right spot for you.
No doubt ----
Now, don't be cross. I think you should go to
Danbury. It's a pleasant place--not too bright,
not too dull.
Seems to me a dull place would be Just the thing
for me.
Nonsense---the trouble with you is that you
don't have enough brightness. You're forever
sitting around thinking about yourself instead
of being gay.

I'm.sorry my ideas of amusement don't coincide

SIS:

SIS:

NUT:
SIS:

SIS:

MUSIC:

113
with yours.
Oh, Framton, stop sounding like the stuffed
shirt that you are. No, really, darling, you're
terribly Jumpy and you need to get away from
things.
So the doctor says. Says I'll go off the deep
end in a nervous break-down if I'm not careful.
I haven't the slightest doubt of it. Now the
thing to do is to go to Danbury.
I still can't see why it must be Danbury.
I'm trying to tell you. I lived there some four
years ago, you know, and I had quite a few
friends.
So what?
I knOW'hOW it will be if you go to some rural
retreat of your own choice. You'll Just bury
yourself and not speak to a living soul and
your nerves will be worse than ever from.moping.
I'll Just give you letters of introduction to
all the peOple I know there. Some of them as
far as I can remember were quite nice. (FADE
OUT) Now the thing for you to do is get your-
self a nice room ----
UP INTO SOMETHING PASTORAL AND OUT
Well, this room.aeems quite all right----nice
view. I'll take it for the next month, at

W0 LLAI x) :

WOMAN:

NUT:

WOMAN :

NUT :

MUSIC:

MRS. H:

114
least. After that--I'1l let you know.
Well, I do hope you'll find it comfortable.
Most folks do. My you look tired. Are you ill?
Yes, you see I must have complete rest, an
absence of mental excitement and an avoidance
of anything in the nature of violent physical
exercise. You see the fact of the matter is
that I've been working much too hard.
Why, you poor boy-- Well, you'll find it quiet
here. No exercise, hmmm? I suppose you can
go for walks?
Oh, yes-~of course--but I absolutely must not
run.
Well, if you get lonesome, you can Join us in
the parlor any time.
Thank you -- my sister has friends here (FADING)
And I'm going to call on them after a while if
I'm not too tired.
(TRANSITION STUFF RATHER LIGHT AND FAST --
BADINAGE UNDER THIS WHOLE SEQUENCE, IF POSSIBLE)
UP AND UNDER
(FADING IN) You know my sister I believe, Mrs.
Haines. You see, I'm here on a nerve-cure. You
see the fact of the matter is-—-
Why, yes, of course. How is she?

Oh, she's fine but---I'm not at all well.

MRS. H:
NUT:

MUSIC:
MRS. T:

NUT:

MUSIC:
NUT:

MUSIC:
NUT:
MUSIC:

NUT:

MUSIC:
NUT:

115
No? What's wrong with you?
You see, I'm here on a nerve cure. I'm to have
complete quiet --no excitement -- no exercise.
It all came upon me very suddenly. (FADING)
You see, I've been working much too hard.
UP AND OUT
Oh, you're Louise's brother. My--you do look
alike.

Of course, she's muchliealthier than I am. You

psee, I'm not at all well--nerves, ya know---

(FADING) I must have absolute quiet.

UP AND UNDER

(FADING IN) Yes, my sister is well, Mrs.
Doolittle, but I must have absolutely no physical
exercise (FADING) and furthermore I must----

UP AND FADE UNDER

(FADING IN) Oh, no, Mrs. Smythe, I can't play
tennis---no exercise you know---don't dare run---
UP AND UNDER

(FADING IN) No--I can't play bridge---I'm.not
supposed to do anything exciting. You see the
doctors (FADE OUT) told me that I must have-—-
UP AND OUT

(FADING IN) Well, I don't kn0W’hOW much good

its done my nerves but I've looked up all the
peOple to whom I had letters of introduction.

MUSIC:
GIRL:

NUT:

GIRL:

NUT:
GIRL:

GIRL:

GIRL:

GIRL:

GIRL:

116
Hmmmm~--not a very interesting group. Of course
there's still the Sappleton's. Well, if I'm.not
too tired (FADING) I'll call on them today.
TRANSITION STUFF UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) My aunt will be down presently,.Mr.
Nuttel, in the meantime you must try and put up
with me.
I'm sure I shall enjoy that. Uh---you're Mrs.
Sappleton's niece?
Yes, fifteen years old.
Oh, you don't say?
Yes, but I'm old for my age, of course.
Of course.
I've had much more eXperience than peOple give
me credit for. Oh, of course, not actual
experience but I read a lot.
You do?
Oh, yes---I love stories.
Oh---well---I used to read a lot but now that
I'm to rest---
Do you know many of the people around here?
Not many. My sister was staying here at the
rectory, you know, some four years ago and she
gave me letters of introduction to some of the
peOple here.

Then you know practically nothing about my aunt?

NUT:

GIRL:

GIRL:

GIRL:

GIRL:

117
Only her name and address.
Hmmmmm-—I see.
Is your aunt a widow?
My aunt? Oh---her great tragedy happened Just
three years ago. That would be since your
sister's time.
Her tragedy?
You.may wonder why we keep that French window
Open on an October afternoon.
It's quite warm for the time of year. But--has
the window got anything to do with the tragedy?
Out through that window, three years ago to a
day, her husband and her two young brothers
went off for their day's shooting. They never
came back.
I say, what happened?
In crossing the moor to their favorite snipe-
shooting ground they were all three engulfed
in a treacherous piece of bog. It had been that
dreadful wet summer, you know, and places that
were safe in other years gave way suddenly with-
out warning. Their bodies were never recovered.
That was the dreadful part of it.
That is dreadful.
Yes, poor aunt. She always thinks they will come
back some day, they and the little brown spaniel

NUT:

GIRL:

GIRL:

MUSIC 2
GIRL:

MUSIC:
MR. S:

MRS. S:

MR. S:

RON:

MRS. S:

118
that was lost with them and walk in at that
window Just as they used to.

Does she still think that?

Oh, yes, you'll see when she comes down. She'll
hardly pay any attention to you. She'll keep
looking out of the window just as if she were
expecting some one. It's horrible.

It must be. Dear me, this isn't likely to do
my nerves much good. -I'm.not supposed to have
any mental excitement at all, you know.

Well, that's why the window is kept open every
evening until it becomes quite dusk. Poor dear
aunt, she has often told me how they went out.
SNEAK UNDER

It was a chilly morning--Just like this morning
was. It wasn't even light yet but they were
preparing to leave. (FADING) Uncle was rais-
ing all sorts of fuss.

OUT

(FADING IN) Dear, where's that white waterproof
coat of mine?

Right here. You'd better put it on, dear.

No, I'll Just carry it over my amm.

(FADING ON) (SINGING) Sing a song of six-pence,
a pocket full or rye....

Are you sure you'll be warm enough? Ronnie, I

RON:
MRS. S:
JACK:

RON:
JACK:

MRS. S:

MR. S:

JACK:

RON:

GIRL:

119
do wish you'd step singing that awful song. It
gets on my nerves.

No---does it?

You know perfectly well it does.

Of course, he knows. He's just singing it to
tease you.

(CONTINUES SINGING)

Oh, shut up, Ron, and let's go. We'll never get
any birds at this rate.

Yes, go now and be sure and keep warm and don't
get too muddy and be careful. .
(FADE) Yes, yes, dear---we'll be back tonight.
(FADING OUT) Goodbye, Sis, wish us luck.
'Bye-—Bye, Sis---- (SINGING) Sing a song of six-
pence (AS FADE OUT)

(FADING IN) So---off they went, her husband

with his white waterproof coat over his arm and
Ronnie, her youngest brother singing "Sing a

Song of Six-pence," as he always did to tease

her, because she said it always got on her nerves.
Do you know, sometimes on still, quiet evenings
like this---I almost get a creepy feeling that
they will walk in through that window.

I declare---my nerves are jumping already. Bad
for me---bad.

(FADING IN) Oh, there you are, Mr. Nuttel. I'm

NUT:

MRS.
NUT:
MRS.

MRS.

NUT:

MRS.

NUT:

MRS.

NUT:

S:

120

so sorry to be so late.

Think nothing of it, Mrs. Sappleton. And how
are you feeling?

Oh, fine, fine--and you?

Well, as a.matter of fact---
Good--I'm.so glad. I hope Vera has been amus-
ing you?

Oh, yes, yes indeed. She has been very interest-
ing.

I hOpe you don't mind the Open window. ,My
husband and brothers are out shooting and I
imagine they'll be back directly. 'Bhey always
come in this way.
Uh---yes---well, the weather is remarkable,
isn't it?

The weather? Oh, yes, yes. They've been out
for snipe in the marshes today so they'll make
a fine mess over my poor carpets. So like you
men-folk, isn't it?

Well, I don't know, I never do any thing like
that. You see I'm.taking a nerve-cure.
Yes---oh, I see. Well, that's too bad. or
course you don't mind too much because hunting
is bad this year---so few birds.

YOu don't say. Well, I'm.to have a complete

rest, absence of mental excitement-~-

MRS .

NUT:

NUT:

MRS.

S:

121
Oh, well, snipe shooting would never do for you.
It's much too exciting. Well, maybe by winter
you can shoot duck with.my husband. fle hunts
all year around--crazy about it.
Yes, so I've heard. Well, I'm.not to have any
violent physical exercise whatsoever. The doctors
all agree on that. On the matter of the diet
they're not so much in agreement. Uh---uh--
Mrs. Sappleton, did you hear me? Are you expect-
ing company.
Dear me, no. Why?
You keep looking out of the window.
Oh, I told you---I'm.expecting my husband and
my two brothers.
Uh--—yes, of course. Well, as I was saying,
they aren't in agreement on my diet. (PAUSE)
Mrs. Sappleton, what's the trouble. Mrs.
Sappleton, do you see something?
Why, yes, I think I see my husband coming. I
can just see a white blur. Still has that coat
over his arm. I'll bet he hasn't put it on all
day. Well, I'm.glad they're back in time for
tea and don't they look as if they were muddy
up to their eyes?
Mrs. Sappleton, you'd better lie down---uh--I

say, Vera, what are you staring at---don't tell

GIRL:

RON:

MR. S:
JACK:

RON:

GIRL:

122
me -----
Look---look out the window. See, there---there
three figures with guns under their arms and
there's the brown spaniel too. Oh, they're
coming nearer.
(FADING IN) Sing a song of six-pence, etc.
I say---I must-wmy hat, my gloves---I say, this
is too much---my nerves---good day---I mean
good night----
DOOR SLAMMING
For heaven's sake---what's wrong with him--he
actually ran out----
Here we are, my dear, fairly muddy but most of
it's dry---Hope you don't mind too much.
No---that's all right.
STAMPING OF FEET
Say, who was that bolted as we came up?
Yes, he almost ran across our paths and then ran
in the other direction.
(LAUGHING) He tripped and fell on the drive and
almost ran into the gate-post.
Dear me, and he said he wasn't supposed to
exercise violently. I do hope it isn't too bad
for hims
He wasn't supposed to have any mental excite-

ment either but I'm afraid he was terribly

MRS. S:

MR. S:

MRS. S:

RON:
GIRL:

MRS. S:

MUSIC:
ANN:

125

excited about something.
Well, I wonder what. A most extraordinary man,
Mr. Nuttel.

Hmmmm--what kind of a chap was he--what was
extraordinary about him?
Why, he couldn't talk about anything except his
illnesses and he dashed off without a word of
apology or good-bye or anything. Just ran off
when you arrived. One would think he'd seen a
ghost.

(LAUGHING) He looked frightened enough.

I expect it was the spaniel. He told me he had
a horror of dogs. He was once hunted into a
cemetery somewhere on the banks of the Ganges by
a pack of parish dogs and had to spend the night
in a newly dug grave with the creatures snarling
and grinning and foaming just above hbm. Enough
to make anyone lose their nerve.
Vera, if you don't stOp making up those tall
stories of yours, I shall have to make you stop
reading so much. The idea---telling such a tale,
about a perfectly harmless young man, too. No
telling what you say about your own family.
THEME UP AND UNDER

Stock Closing.

124

Notes on the Adaptation anderoduction of
Saki's The Open Window

Reasons for Adaptation

In the deveIOpment of the British short story, the
'stories of Saki (H. H.‘Munro) stand out because of their
uniquely droll humor. He was versatile in his depiction
and satirization of Englishmen and I chose this story be-
cause it displays one of his favorite and most imitated
types of writing.

Adaptation Problem;

There was no great adaptation problem. The story lent
itself rather well to the process, being simple in its
original format. The important thing was the characteriza-
tion of this semi-hypochondriac so that the humor of the
denouement would be apparent.
gaggingand Acting.

The main character, Nuttel, should have a rather nasal
voice. Outside of that, the casting is a matter of getting
good straights.

Nuttel should be played as a rather dull neurotic.
Under no circumstances should much sympathy for him.be
aroused, but rather, his illness should seem ludicrous.
semi ,

There are nothing but standard sound problems in this
script, though they should be handled carefully because of

their importance.

125
Script Changes

There were no cuts made in this script, whatsoever.
The only changes made were additions because the script
ran short and because I found that Nuttel's characterization
‘was not quite clear. He was not established clearly in the
first scene as an egocentric neurotic until I added the
lines, "Did you find out what's wrong with.me, Doctor,”
and "I know I'm a sick man," and, ”Why what would I do in
the country -- with no doctors around?"

Too, I inserted further conversation with the'wmman
from.whom.he rented the room.and with all of his sister's
friends to ShOW‘What a bore he is on the subject of health.
These inserts lengthened the script and built up Nuttel's

characterization.

MUSIC:
NARR:

SOUND:
UNCLE:
SOUND:
BOY:

UNCLE:

BOY:
UNCLE:

126

MY REMARKABLE UNCLE
By Stephen Leacock

Adapted by M. J. Martin
Stock Opening ---- Stephen Leacock's ---- My
Remarkable Uncle
THEME UP AND OUT
I once had a fabulous uncle
Whose actions were really sublime
He was different, amazing---unusua1 and dazing
And, what's more---all of the time!
My father was quiet and austere
And lived on a Canada farm
With stillness unending and.manner unbending
A life that was far frmm alarm.
But not for long, this rural song
Played on uninterrupted
For into our peace with splutter and flutter
Beginning an era of chaos quite utter
My fabulous uncle erupted.
LOUD KNOCKING AND STAMPING OF FEET
Halloo--—halloo--ooh! ------ Is anybody home?
DOOR OPENING
Hello, sir---- Can I help you, sir?
Ah: YOu must be Stephen. Well, well---how you've
grown.
Yes, I'm.Stephen---but---
(LAUGHING) Don't know'me, do you? Ah--but you

MUSIC:
NARR:

MUSIC:
UNCLE:

BOY:
UNCLE:
NARR:

127
'will. I'm.your Uncle Edward. Just call me E.
P. Well---let me in, boy--—don't look so afraid.
(FADING) I've just gotten in from the
Mediteranean.
EXOTIC AND LIGHT UP AND UNDER
His talk was of glittering travel.
He spoke of the blue Mediterranean
Of Nubian slaves--Algerian knaves
And castles long subterranean.
He talked of pyramids, sphinxes and gold
In a most casual, off-handed way
Of rubies and pearls--of princes and earls,
He talked all night and all day.
UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) It was a bright, starry night---
like all Egyptian nights are-~eand the Earl of
Fosdic and I -----
Uncle, do you know the Prince of Wales?
Quite intimately----
It was a trick he had
When someone put a query
Casual and gay-~off-handedly he'd say:
Quite intimately----
Or----
Oh, definitely---

Or yet----

128

UNCLE: Close friends---

NARR: Again---

UNCLE: Our correspondence never ends.

NARR: No further explanation-~no long involved narra-
tion.

Just terse and calm and very cheery.
MUSIC: UP AND OUT
NARR: In 1878 there was a Canadian general election
And Uncle took an active part
His views political were slightly hypocritical
His knowledge historical, phantasmagorical
But he spoke at every meeting
Petting heads and greeting
Taking all unto his heart.
UNCLE: Why, let me see, surely if your name is Framley,
you must be a relation of my dear old friend,
General Sir Charles Framley of the Horse Artill-
ery? _
HICK: Mebbe. (FLATTERED LAUGHTER) I guess, mebbe. I
ain't kept track very good of my folks in the old
country.
UNCLE: Dear’me: I must tell Sir Charles I've seen you.
He'll be so pleased.
NARR: In this way he conferred honors on the peasantry
And won votes for his side,

Which.was, of course, aristocratic

UNCLE:

MUSIC:
NARR:

UNCLE:

MUSIC:
NARR:

129
Oh---far from democratic
But sisterly and brotherly---fatherly and
motherly
And based upon nobility and pride.
How else could plain folk vote,
Since, now, they're aristocracy
Than for conservative democracy?
Dewey, please take note:
That's the kind of politics to play. Be con-
servative but love everybody---even the humblest.
You know, a democrat can't condescend. He's
down already. Ah--but when a conservative stoops,
he conquers.
UP AND OUT
But soon Ontario began to pall
It seemed the possibilities were small
But Winnipeg was new and fortunes really grew.
And, thence, my uncle led us one and all.
The Star of the Empire glitters in the west---
let's go---
UP AND UNDER
In Winnipeg it wasn't long
Before E. P. was going strong
He soon knew everyone in town
From.the highest of officials to the baker and

on down

UNCLE:

NARR:

UNCLE:

IUMGH

UNCLE:

NARR:

130
And he kept on with assurance
In his flattering conferrance
Of titles slightly spurious
Upon the poor and curious.
He cut a fancy caper
Made millions upon paper
Built a house gargantual
Got a wife substantual
And started on a round of gayety
Hospitality and spontaneity
That was really most extensive
To say nothing of expensive,
But it mattered not a whit,
'Cause my uncle lived by wit.
Let's see now-~I'm president of the bank.
The bank was never Open
But his creditors kept hOpin'
I'm head of a brewery
The brewery never brewed
And his creditors just stewed.
I'm also secretary-treasurer of the Winnipeg
Hudson Bay and Arctic Ocean Railway and we have
a charter authorizing us to build a road to the
Arctic Oceanxwhen we get ready.
They never got ready

But the benefits were steady.

UNCLE:

NARR:

131
They hadn't any track
But you can't hold uncle back.
'Well, I've printed stationary and passes for our
railroad company and sent the passes to railroad
men all over North America. If anyone from
another railway wants to ride on.my trains, they
can do it for nothing-~when we get the thing
completed, of course. In the meanttme, all these
railroads have sent me passes. Nice of them,
isn't it? I can travel all over the continent
for nothing. (FADING) Very nice of them~-- .
But naturally his main hold was politics.
As a legislator he was something sinister
He made laws, corrected flaws,
Codified and modified
Changed and rearranged
Until everyone was stupefied
Even the Prime Minister.
His views were still conservative,
Reactionary, preservative
Our ancestors were insufficient
But we remained not long deficient.
My uncle by some strange, happy fluke
Invented a wonderful Portuguese Duke
And made me the twice-removed heir

To a Portuguese castle surpassingly fair.

UNCLE:

NARR:

MUSIC

NARR:

SOUND:
NARR:

UNCLE:

CRED:

152
Pointing to me with a quiet sort of pride
He'd say in a confidential aside:
Strange to think that two deaths would make
that boy a Portuguese Duke.
My only sorrow was that still
I never knew which Portuguese to kill.
SINISTER AND MEASURED UP AND UNDER
But then came the crash of the Manitoba boom}
BOOM
Simple people like my father were wdped out in
a day.
But E. P. didn't feel the crash
He had no dollars and no cents!
But it made no difference
He used credit, since he had no cash
And went his merry way.
His hospitality still roared
His many bills still soared
He laughed and ate and played
And the tradesmen paid and paid.
If they called for reparation
My uncle said with indignation:
I can't be bothered right now with such details.
I'm.waiting daily for a cable.
‘Well, but will you be in Winnipeg all winter, Mr.

Leacock?

UNCLE:

NARR:

MUSIC:
NARR:

UNCLE:
CLERK:
UNCLE:

CLERK:
UNCLE:

133
It will depend a good deal on what happens in
West Africa.
Just that---a faint suggestion
But all feared to further question
This being ministerial
Who awaited summonses imperial.
UP AND OUT
It was now my uncle took countless trips.
If he felt worried in the least
He simply travelled to the east
This was for the very best
His creditors in the west
Were no end impressed.
He travelled on a railroad pass
And always in the highest class.
He never paid at any hotel
And his system.worked remarkably well.
May I have my bill, please, clerk?
Yes, sir---here it is, sir--seventy-six dollars.
What---only seventy-six dollars? IMy‘word, (ASIDE)
Stephen, compare this with the Hotel Crillon in
Paris.
Is ;§_so eXpensive, sir?
Indeed, yes--- and offers very little more than
you do. (ASIDE) Stephen, do remind me to mention

to Sir John hOW'admirably'we've been treated; he's

CLERK:
UNCLE:

CLERK:
UNCLE:

NARR:

MUSIC:’

NARR:

UNCLE:
BART:

134
coming here next week.
You mean Sir John, The Prime Minister, sir?
Yes, of course, but now, let's see---seventy-six
dollars---seventy-six--- You give me twenty-
four dollars----
Why-~uh--we can't----
You give me twenty-four dollars and then I can
remember to send an even hundred when I send you
the money for my bill.
The poor clerk trembled
But he was brave---he gave.
He didn't know my uncle's name
But he gave him.money just the same
And waited for Sir John, who never came.
UP AND OUT
But of course it couldn't last
The day of grandeur soon was past
Creditors grew cruel---acquaintances turned cool.
Uncle shuffled shabbily along the street
Looking eagerly for friends to great
But hotels refused to take him
And the bar-rooms wouldn't stake him.
Bartender, five, please, for my friends, here.
Listen, Mr. Leacock, you ain't gettin' served,
see? You never paid a cent in here in your life

and you've drunk gallons. Now---get out and stay

135
out.
UNCLE: Come away, Stephen, I'm afraid the poor fellow's
crazy: But I hate to report him.
NARR: The railways found at last
That he had no company
And when he tried to travel, insisted on a fee.
But hard times weren't for Uncle,
The Lord provides for such as he.
We sent him.back to England and-~a most amazing
thing:
No sooner did he get there, than he was living
like a king.
He found an ancient monastary
Where the 'brothers' were unwary
And descended on them sans delay.
But for the first time in his life
So full of mad, gay strife
.my uncle really paid his way.
He delved into finance
And discovered quite by chance
That the government unluckily
Owed the 'brothers' currency.
Without brooking interference
He put in his appearance
At Westminister and made his stand.

British officials aren't, after all, unique

UNCLE:

NARR:

MUSIC:
NARR:

136
And uncle used his usual technique
And very soon they were eating from his hand.
He hinted at his vast investments overseas
And remembering how they missed Johannesburg or
were Just late on Persian oil,
The officials were most anxious, sir, to please.
When you come out to Canada, I must take you over
our railway. I really think that as soon as
we reach the Coppermine River we must put the
shares on here; it's too big for New York----
So E. P., nothing daunted
Got exactly what he wanted
And the 'brothers' profited much
Bought more prayer books and such
And full of sweet beatitude
Augmented by their gratitude
They asked E. P. to manage their affairs,
Which quite released E. P. from any sort of cares.
And I can tell you here and now,
It's good they asked, 'cause he'd have lived
there anyhow.
PASTORAL UP AND UNDER
In sleepy gardens, 'neath shady trees
E. P. completed his life of ease.
And if there's a Paradise, I'm sure he got in.

Imagination is not a sin.

137
Besides he no doubt said as he neared the gate,
UNCLE: Peter?---Oh, a relation of Sir Peter Frothingdate?
MUSIC: UP AND OUT

ANN: Stock Closing ------

138

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Leacock's My;Remarkable Uncle

 

Reasons for Adaptation

In choosing this selection for adaptation, I chose the
story, rather than the author. Stephen Leacock, though
Canadian, rather than British, employs a type of humor as
typically British as any of our day and, although this piece
is not strictly a story, it is, nevertheless, typical of
his work and of a good deal of British and American writing.
In displaying British literature, one thinks first of humor.
Tragedy is universal but styles in humor are distinctive,
regardless of the wholesale borrowing that goes on between‘
writers of different nations.
Adaptation Problems

This was the problem of making a plotless story as amus-
ing in radio drama as it is to read. Because there was little
dialogue and little action in the piece itself, there had to
be a way to transfer Leacock's very gay style from the
printed page to oral drama. Verse seemed the best way to do
it. I believe the verse accomplished the purpose, allowing
many of Leacock's "bon mots" to remain intact. Straight
monologue by a narrator would have been too long and would
not have held the listener. This is the best example of
good adaptation in the series. It is also the best example
of bringing to radio a type of literature which is not

always successfully transferred from one medium to another,

139
namely the story in which the humor is in the telling as
much, if not more than, in the story. Once verse was
decided upon, however, there were no further adaptation
problems to surmount.

Casting and Acting

 

Naturally, the narrator is the great problem here. He
must be young, yet authoritative. Certainly, he must have
a very flexible voice because there is a lot of verse to
be read and a lot of voice variety is demanded. In casting
this part, a director should hold careful auditions and
choose someone who is good at reading verse. Many a good
actor can not read verse, particularly rhymed verse, but
will sing-song the instant he gets the rhythm. If the
actor demands much coaching in verse-reading, all of the
director's time will be used in gaining variety in the
narration and the much-needed dramatic timing of the flash-
backs will be neglected. The narrator must, of course, be
able to read with his tongue in his cheek and yet eXpress
sympathy and sincerity. Too, he must not laugh too.much
but must read in a fairly straight manner.

The uncle should not be understimated. He is bluff,
hearty, lovable, but shrewd and not a dunce. If he is play-
ed as a complete four-flusher, W. C. Fields' style, the
play will lose a lot of its characterization value. He is not
Just a stock character and must not be played as one. Once

those two characters are cast, the other casting and acting

140
problems are standard. The rest of the cast should be very
matter-of-fact to make the thing credible. The whole cast
should be expert at pacing and timing or the mood will be
destroyed. The verse should be read as slowly as possible,
without losing any vitality. The emphasis in each line is
very important or the audience may lose the meaning.

When producing this script substitute the name of some
prominent local or national politician in the line, "Dewey,
please take note!" The script was written at the time of
the 1945 Presidential campaign but the line as it stands is
now dated. However, it can be changed to fit the time by
changing the name.
semi

Quite standard but the music must be chosen very care-
fully and perfectly timed. One mistake in timing, sound
or drama, can ruin the unity of the script, even more than
in ordinary prose scripts. Such is the nature of poetry!

Script thnges
Most of the changes made in this script were for the

sake of better scansion, hence, better reading. For example,

the lines:
”In Winnipeg it wasn't long
Before E. P. was going strong
He soon knew everyone in town

From the highest of officials to the baker and on dowp.

141
And he kept on with assurance
With his flattering conferrance
Of titles slightly spurious
Upon the poor and curious,"
originally read:
"Here E. P. really hit his stride
In less than no time he knew everything.
He continued his flattering conferring
Of titles..."

That was rather awkward phraseology and the change to
the present wording improved the script. There were three.
other changes to improve the scansion but they were only re-
wordings of one line.

In addition, one scene, dealing with the uncle's
method of buying a carriage on credit, was omitted. This
was for the sake of timing and did not really detract from
the story because there are sufficient other examples of his

methods in the script.

MUSIC:

DOCTOR:

NINA:

DOCTOR:

NINA:

DOCTOR:
NINA:

DOCTOR:
NINA:

DOCTOR:
NINA:

142
FOG HORN
By Gertrude Atherton
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening ---- Gertrude Atherton's ----
Fog Horn----
UP AND OUT AND SEGUE INTO FOG HORN SOUND
(FADING IN) Nurse, she's coming to. Be careful.
We don't know how she'll react.
(FADING IN) Ummm--ummmmp---where ----- where---
oh----a hospital----Why? 'What happened? Oh--
yes. Doctor, how's Leslie, is he all right?
My'dear--Leslie?
Yes, yes, Leslie---the man they brought in with
me last night. HOW’is he? His head---oh---I
remember it was cut cpen---awful---oh---please
is he going to live?
My dear, Leslie is dead.
Dead? Oh-—--I----loved him so---and nowa---my
life is worth nothing---all the years ahead
worthless---
Try to get a little rest.
Oh---yes. (PAUSE) Where's Uncle Ben? Where's
my family---didn't they come?
Yes, they came.
Then why did they leave before I came to? Why
did they go away when I need them so? Oh---I

know---they're ashamed of me. They couldn't under-

DOCTOR:

NINA:

SOUND:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

143
stand.» I suppose the papers are out and all the
little smug peOple are saying, "Like father,
like daughter." I suppose you know, too, don't
you? Oh---well--you could never understand how
it was with us----(SOBS) And---now---I'1l never
see him.again---I'1l have to live my whole life
through Just remembering and I'll have to remember
last night and that red fog---have you ever seen
red fog---red from blood? Oh---

Please lie down and be quiet. Nurse, the needle,
please. (PAUSE) There, you'll feel better now.
(FADING) Fog---Leslie---I remember the first
night I met him,

DANCE MUSIC FADING IN IN BACKGROUND...OCCASIONAL
SOUND OF WATER LAPPING

(FADING IN) I thought I saw you leave the dance,
Miss Nina.

Yes, I came out to see the fog---I love it.

How did you.manage to evade all your young men?
(LAUGHING) er. Allen---that sounded a bit sar-
castic.

(LAUGHING) I didn't mean it to—-—really. Only
watching you, I wondered if you didn't get Just
a little tired of being torn from your partner
every two steps.

(LAUGHING) Let's just say I thought I'd like to

SOUND:
NINA:
LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:
SOUND:
LESLIE:
NINA:

LESLIEt:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:
NINA:

144

see the fog rolling in and that's why I ran out.
FOG-HORNS IN DISTANCE

That's a sound that always pleases me.

(AFTER A PAUSE) The fog! I think it's the
loveliest thing about San Francisco.
Don't you have fog in.Boston, Mr. Allen?
Not this kind.

FOG HORNS

Aren't you getting cool?

Yes---I am. Shall we go in?
If we do, I'll have to give you up.

I'm.sure you won't mind--at least not if you can
snatch your pretty wife back from.the stag-line.
(LAUGHS) Yes--but I'm curious about you. What
do you do besides dance?

(LAUGHING) Oh, the truth about me is so horrible
I never tell anyone--1east of all a man!

Why do you say that?

Ohu-it's all right for a girl to "simply adore"
music and painting-—but if she's ”intellectual"
that's bad---scares a man every time.

And are you intellectual?

Not really---but I‘gg attend morning classes at
the University and Ilgg read Latin and Greek
Isn't

classics in the original text. (LAUGHS)

that awful?

LESLIE:

NINA:

MUSIC:
SOUND:
NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:
NINA:
LESLIE:

NINA:
MUSIC:

LESLIE:

NINA:
MUSIC:
SOUND:
NINA:

145
(LAUGHS) Matter of fact, I think it's rather
wonderful--- It must take a lot of time to do
that. Do you commute every day?
Yes, I do, but--I love the ferry-boat ride.
(FADING) Have you ever taken the ferry?
LIGHT UP AND UNDER
WATER SLOSHING PAST BOAT INTERMITTENTLY
(FADING IN) Oh---Mr. Allen, what on earth are
you doing on the ferry?
Hello, Miss Nina---Just riding--- You said it
was nice, so I thought I'd try it. --- Lovely
morning, isn't it?
Yes---it is.
Are you going to your classes at the University?
Yes, I am.
Good. I'll ride on the train to the campus with
you.
(FADING) Oh, that will be splendid.
UP AND UNDER
(FADING IN) Nina, I'll come to the lecture with
you today and then we'll have lunch.
(FADING) Leslie, that will be fun.
UP AND OUT
FADE IN CROWD AND TABLE NOISES IN BACKGROUND
(FADING IN) Hmmm~--it's nice to be in here out

of the rain. This is a charming place. Why

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:
NINA:

146
haven't we come here more often, Leslie?
Oh, I don't knowe--I've tried to find different
places to take you.
You have. It's been grand.
I'm.sorry, Nina, that our activities have to be
so--uh--limited.
Oh---this has been fun. Please don't feel sorry.
Aren't you ever afraid we'll be seen?
No---why should I be? We've done or said nothing
wrong. (LAUGHING) Why, Leslie, you've never even
held.my hand. _
(LAUGHING) Haven't I? You have beautiful hands.
Remind me to do that, will you?
Besides---it's funny---I don't care. Strange
because I've always been so very conservative.
You see, my father left my mother and ran off with
some woman and---oh---Uncle Ben says that there've
been queer twists in dad's family since way back.
So---I've really been more conventional than I
wanted to be---Just to show everyone.
And now you don't care any more?
'Well, mother's dead and my sisters are all married
and scandal would only amuse them. Of course,
Uncle Ben and my brothers would be furious if
peOple talked about me, but, for myself, I don't

care what the world says.

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:
MUSIC:
SOUND:

LESLIE:
NINA:
LESLIE:
SOUND:

NINA:

LESLIE:
NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:
SOUND:
LESLIE:

NINA:

147
That's good: I've worried for fear you've
worried.
(LAUGHING) Well, I don't know why we got so
serious all of a sudden. After all---you haven't
made love to me or anything.
(LAUGHING FADING) No---after all I haven't.
UP AND OUT
GENERAL CONVERSATION IN BACKGROUND...LAUGHTER...
SOUND OF ICE IN GLASSES
Nina, let's go for a walk.
All right---we won't be missed, I fear.
Let's climb these steps up the mountain-side.
FOOTSTEPS ON STONE STEPS
(AFTER A PAUSE...BREATHING A LITTLE HEAVILY)
Hmmmp--pretty steep.
(CLIMBING) Straight up, in fact.
Oh---how good the night smells. I like spring!
You like everything, Nina. The first thing you
said to me when we met last fall was that you
like the fog.
Whew! We've made it:
STEPS STOP
(CONTINUING) During the winter, you like the
rain and now that spring is here---you love that
too.

(LAUGHING) Ah---but I haven't forgotten my other

LESLIE:

NINA:

MUSIC:

LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:
MUSIC:
SOUND:

LESLIE:

NINA:

148
loves. Guess I like life.
I know---that's what makes you so perfect to be
with. Too tired from the climb to walk through
the forest?
No---let's. (PAUSE) Redwood trees---in a way
they're unfriendly---so big and so old---but they
are protective, too. Oh---can't you.imagine the
gods walking down these long tall aisles?
SNEAKS IN UNDER FOLLOWING
They must have walked here. Nina---I feel like
a god myself, walking here beside you.
Must be the moonlight.
No---I feel that way at high-noon, walking with
you. Nina, it's because I love you. I love you
so much.
Leslie, I love you, too.
CRESCENDO...UP AND OUT
FADE IN CROWD AND TABLE NOISES IN BACKGROUND
(FADING IN) Nina,---you're not eating.
Oh, the spaghetti has liver in it but it doesn't
matter. Oh, Leslie. I'dg love you but-~I'd
rather never see you again than to have to carry
on a secret intrigue-~meeting you in some shady
corner of the town where they don't ask questions
---in some awful rooms where thousands of

"furtive" lovers have met before.

LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:

NINA:

LESLIE:

MUSIC:
SOUND:
LESLIE:

149
Dear, I don't want you to. But, you know the
alternative. I've asked my wife for a divorce.
I told her I loved some one else but she's taking
her one chance for revenge.
I don't really blame her.
No---neither do I. But---our only other alterna-
tive is to elOpe---e10pe in the good old fasioned
style. Would you run away with me? I've plenty
of money. We can have all EurOpe for a perpetual
honeymoon until my wife's family persuades her to
get a divorce. Then we'll come back to the states
and I'll work at something. (LAUGHING) I'm.not
a born idler.
Of course I'll go, Leslie.
Are you sure, Nina? Can you stand the gaff?
Leslie, I could "love" many times---but only once
can I find the completion I find with you.
Darling, I'd be a fool to give it up. Of course
I'll go:
Darling, I'll make you happy. We'll leave to-
morrow. I can get reservations. But---now--1et's
go rowing on the bay Just one last time.
UP AND OUT
WATER LAPPING ON SHORE
(FADING IN) Come on, Nina, get in. I'll hold the

boat steady. All set?

NINA:
LESLIE:
SOUND:

NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:
NINA:
SOUND:

LESLIE:
NINA:

LESLIE:

NINA:
LESLIE:
SOUND:

150
All set.
Here we go--
OARS BEING SET IN OARLOCKS AND THEN SOUND OF ROW-
ING INTERMITTENLY
(LAUGHING) You row magnificently, darling, such
long, easy strokes.
Stop flattering me, minx. Take a good look at
the lights of your home-town, darling. Tomorrow
night we'll be on our way and you may not see them
soon again.
Pretty lights, aren't they? Ummm—--nice night.
No moon.
Ah--but lots of stars.
ROWING SOUNDS FOR SEVERAL SECONDS THEN INTERMIT-
TENLY AGAIN
Here we go--—out between the Golden Gates.
Daring, aren't we? Dare you to row straight
across to China! I
(LAUGHS) China, we'll go there too. We'll go
everywhere. EurOpe first, we'll do all the
things peOple always want to do but never have
time for on European tours. And after that-~-
the Orient---and---
Leslie---look fog coming in.
Yes, and fast. Gotta get out of here.

FAST ROWING UNDER ALL OF THIS

NINA:

LESLIE:

SOUND:
LESLIE:
NINA:

LESLIE:
NINA:

LESLIE

SOUND:
NINA:
SOUND:
NINA:

LESLIE:

SOUND:

SOUND:
NINA:

LESLIE:

SOUND:

151
I think we can make the beach below Sutro Heights.
(STRAINING) Yes, 1'11 try.
ROWING SOUNDS
How are we doing? .
Oh, Leslie, it's coming so fast. It's just like
it's chasing us. There are wisps of it right
behind you.
Uh---yes---
Darling, swerve right a little---maybe we can get
out of it.
(GRUNTS) All right.
ROWING INCREASES
Oh, it's getting thicker here--Just go straight.
ROWING
It's Just as thick here.
Nina--it's too 1ate--we're caught!
FOG HORN SOUNDS
Oh, that's the horn on Point Bonito. I know it.
FOG HORN AGAIN
Oh, but Leslie, I can't tell where it is. I'm
all mixed up.
DIFFERENT FOG HORN SOUNDS
And that's off Alcatraz but---I can't tell the
direction. Oh, I don't know where we are!
Neither do I. Ch, Nina, this is awful and---

SHIP HORN BLASTS AND IS ANSWERED BY ANOTHER'S

LESLIE:
SOUND:
LESLIE:
SOUND:

NINA:

SOUND:

NINA:

MUSIC:
NINA:

NINA:

SOUND:
NINA:

152
COUNTERBLAST
Ships---where are they?
FURIOUS ROWING
I can't see them.in this fog but they're close.
ANOTHER BLAST LOUDER AND SOUND OF WATER SWIRLING
FURIOUSLY
(SCREAMS) Leslie, turn—---
CRASH AND SHOUTS AND SCREAMS. BLAST VERY LOUD
(SCREAMING AND SOBBING) Leslie—-—oh---look out-~
oh (SCREAMS)
UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) (SCREAL'IING) His head---(SCREAIvIS
PIERCINGLY)
(FADING 0N) Oh---I screamed. I must have been
screaming a long time. Funny no one heard me.
Where's that doctor? 'Why did he leave me alone?
I want to get out of here. I want to go home.
BED CREAKS
Oh---I'm.weak. I must have been in bed a long
time. Uncle Ben and the family will be coming
soon----the doctor said they came. Oh----I'll
be glad to get home. I feel awful. If I could
Just comb my hair---(PAUSE) IMy hair---good
heavens, they cut my hair! I must have had brain
fever then. How awful. I wonder if the fever

left marks on.me? If I could Just get to that

SOUND:

NINA:

SOUND:

DOCTOR:

SOUND:

DOCTOR:

NURSE:

DOCTOR:

SOUND:
NINA:

153
mirror over the basin. It's not so far. Maybe
if I hold on to the bed. (GROANS) (BED CREAKS)
One hand on the foot of the bed and the other
hand--- (SCREAMS) My hands---look at my hands---
all withered----and the veins---

FEET STUMBLING UNDER

(CONTINUING) Oh---I must see myself (SOBS) what
has it done to me---I must see the mirror (SCREAMS
PIERCINGLY)

BODY THUDS TOITHE FLLOR. DOOR OPENS. FOOTSTEPS
RUNNING FADE IN

(FADING IN) Nurse, help me, she's fainted. Take
her feet. (GRUNTS) There----

BED CREAKS

Now---cover her up. That's right.

Doctor, she must have seen herself in the mirror
and realized----

Yes, I'm afraid so. Strange how sometimes they
regain reason Just before death. Too bad---it
would have been so much kinder if she'd never
known. Well---I've given her an inJection---she'll
be quiet now. Come on---we'11 leave her to die
in peace. (FADING) Look in later, will you?
DOOR CLOSES

Leave me to die in peace--—in peace? (SOBS) I'm
an old woman---old---my whole life's gone and

I've never lived at all! I've been crazy—--crazy

154
my whole life. (SCREAMING AND SOBBING AND LAUGH-
ING) And now--- I'm supposed to die in peace.
MUSIC: UP AND OUT --—- SNEAK THEME IN UNDER FOLLOWING
ANN: Stock Closing ----

155

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Atherton's Fog Horn_

Reasons for Adaptation

This story is an excellent example of the type of story
so very pOpular, especially among women, in the latter part
of the last century and the first part of this. The style
of plot, characters and writing are very representative of
the great bulk of popular literature of that time.
Adaptation Pzgglgms

The main problem.here was dramatization of streampof-
consciousness, which was the main device in the story. The
question was, whether or not it could be best done by having
her think aloud to herself or carry on a conversation with
others. Production proved the superiority of the latter
method. Visualization and characterization were the next
problems. In the story it was, of course, easily done by
description. In the script, it was accomplished with con-
versation but the problem was to keep it from sounding forced.

Another problem.was to show passage of time, without
wasting time doing it and without using montage, which should
not be overworked. The accident scene was a difficult one
to visualize, without the aid of description. The descrip-
tion had to be put in to the conversation, naturally, and
with care that it sound like what a person might actually say
in time of great stress. The sound effects written in here

are of great descriptive value but they are too repetitious

156
to be used much. Consequently, the burden lay on the writ-
ing.

Castipggand Acting

Nina must be able to sound older and younger at will
and still be recognizable as the same person. In the play-
ing, too sharp a differentiation between her voice at the
beginning and end and in the flash-backs should be avoided.
Let the difference be in manner of delivery, more than in
voice, though, of course, there must be some voice-change.
Nina is SOphisticated for her day but she is, nonetheless,

a pure and idealistic person. She should be played as a
cultured, intelligent, strong girl, who has purposely held
herself aloof, so that she still has naivete. Avoid playing
her with an extreme of s0phistication or naivete. The writ-
ing could lend itself to either but the spirit of the story
would be distorted if it were done either way.

In the accident scene, let the players exercise re-
straint. Let the panic grow but remain controlled until the
crash.

The doctor must be played very matter-of-factly, though
he is not without sympathy.

Sound

The important thing in the sound pattern is, obviously,
the water. The lapping of waves should not be overdone.
Space the sounds far apart so that they are not annoying to

— the listener. It is acceptable to establish this sound and

157
then fade it down. However, maintaining the same perspective
and diminishing the frequency of the sound is preferable.

In the rowing, the important thing is to space the sounds
widely at first and then, when the crisis comes, work care-
fully with the actors for timing. The fog-horns are a problem
of perspective, primarily, which can be tested. One thing
to remember is that the different fog-horns should sound'
really different. The fog-horn at the climax should be very
loud and frantic.
Script Changag

In the original script, the opening scene was one in,
which Nina thought aloud and so supplied the needed
exposition. It was not a very effective method of getting
the story told. In the first place, it is always a weak
device, because listening to a person's thoughts, for any
length of time, strains the credulity of the listener.
Secondly, long monologues are not very desirable in radio be-
cause the audience cannot see motivating movement. Consequent-
ly, a monologue is difficult to portray naturally. For this
reason, the Opening scene was changed from stream-of—conscious-
ness on Nina's part to dialogue with the doctor and the whole
play was stronger and.more convincing.

The same change was made in the final scene. Dialogue
with the doctor was substituted for a stream-of—consciousness
scene, where she discovers her state all alone. However, the

dialogue would weaken the climax. To effect a compromise

158
between the two methods, the amount of Nina's thinking aloud
was reduced (and more movement was added) and the amount of
dialogue was also reduced. As it stands, half of the_
denouement occurs through Nina's thoughts and half through
the doctor's and nurse's conversation. The dramatic impact
was greater than it would have been if the dialogue had been
used exclusively as a means of revelation. At the same time,
the revelation is more natural than it would have been if
the scene had been all streampof-consciousness.

The only other change was lengthening the accident scene
to allow more time for building to a climax. In the first,
script, the scene was over too soon and much of the horror
was lost. So, more dialogue and more movement was added to

give time for suspense.

MUSIC:
ANN:
MUSIC:
SOUND:
BARBER:

159
HAIRCUT
By Ring Lardner
Adapted by'Mg J. Martin

THEME UP AND UNDER
Stock Opening ---- Ring Lardner's ---- Haircut----
UP AND OUT
DOOR OP”TS AND CLOSES AND BELL RINGS
(FADING IN) Come right in, sir. Shave and hair-
cut? Sit right in this chair. There that's fine--
now the towel---Just lean back---good! (PAUSE)
You're a newcomer, ain't you? I know I ain't seen
you around before. I hOpe you like it good enough
to stay. We ain't no New York City or Chicago,
but we have pretty good times. Not as good,
thOugh, since Jim Kendall got killed. When he was
alive, him.and Hod Meyers used to keep this town
in an uproar. I bet there was more laughin' done
here than any town its size in America. Jim.was
comical and Hod was pretty near a match for him.
Since Jim's gone, Hod tries to hold his end up
Just the same as ever, but it's tough goin' when
you ain't got nobody to kind of work with. They
used to be plenty fun in here Saturdays. This
place is Jamepacked Saturdays, from four o'clock
on.. Jim.and Hod would show up right after their
supper, round six o'clock. Jim would set himself

down in that big chair, near the blue spitton.

JIM:

BARBER:

JIM:

HOD:

CROWD:

JIM:

160
Whoever had been settin' in that chair, why they'd
get up when Jim come in and give it to him. YOu'd
of thought it was a reserved seat like they have
sometimes in a theayter. Hod would generally
always stand or walk up and down, or some Saturdays
of course, he'd be settin' in this chair part of
the time, gettin' a haircut. Well, Jim would set
there a wile without openin' his mouth only to
spit and then finally he'd say to me,
(FADE IN) Barber Whitey, your nose looks like a
rosebud tonight. YOu must of been drinkin' some
of your aw de cologne.
No, Jim, but you look like you'd been drinkin'
somethin' of that kind or somethin' worse.
(LAUGHING RAUCOUSLY) No, I ain't had nothin' to
drink but that ain't sayin' I wouldn't like some—
thin'. I wouldn't even mind if it was wood
alcohol.
Neither would your wife.
MUCH LAUGHTER AND AD LIB --- "THAT'S A GOOD 'UN --
YOU TELL 'EM, HOD, AND ETC."
I guess that's right, Hod. (LAUGHING) YOu said
it that time. She'd like to get rid of me all
right. Only there ain't no chance. If she
divorced me I wouldn't give her no alimony and

she don't have no way of takin' care of herself

HOD:
JIM:

JAKE:

J DI'I :

C R0 ‘J‘U'D :

HOD:

JIM:

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MRS :
BOY:

MRS:

161
and the kids. Ah---we11, she should be satisfied.
I give her a couple a bucks a week anyways.
What‘dOes she need with more?

I dunno---but ain't she takin' in dress makin'?
Sure---but this ain't no New York City and no one
is goin' ta git rich sewin'.around here. (LAUGHS)
Naw she ain't got a chance.

I thought she was goin' to them cannin' peOple
you sells for over in Cartersville and ask them
to give her your wages?

She did! (LAUGHING) Yeah, but I outwitted her.
I borrow most of my pay in advance. She can't
put nothin' over on me nohow.

GENERAL LAUGHTER

You're a card, Jim. Ain't no one around here like
you.

Aw---that ain't nothin'. I'll learn her to try
foxin' me. Just you wait---they's a circus comin'
to town (FADING OUT) and I'm gonna tell my wife
what's what~--

UP AND OUT

Come on children, hurry up. Your father said
he'd take us to the Evans Circus today.

Gee, that's swell. When's he comin' home after
us?

He said he'd buy the tickets and meet us at the

MUSIC:
BARBER:

HOD:

JIM:

CROWD:

BARBER:

162
gate. Isn't it gonna be a treat?
Mom, have you ever seen a circus?
No, but I've heard about 'em. They have all sorts
of animals and people swingin' on swings way up
in the air and all sorts 0' things you'll like.
Now hurry and get dressed in your best clothes.
(FADING OUT) Now don't take too long. We have to
meet----
UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) Well, they got theirselves over ta
the circus gate. But Jim didn't have no intentions
of bein' there or buyin' tickets or nothin'.
He got full of gin and laid round Wright's pool-
room all day. (FADING) He was havin' a big
time----
(FADE IN) Hey, Jim, what you doin' not workin'
today?
(LAUGHING) This is the day I'm.s'posed to take
the wife and kids to the circus....but I ain't
workin' no more anyways--— Gentlemen, I got an
important announcement to make. I been fired from
my Job. I been sellin' canned goods and now I'm
canned goods myself.
MUCH LAUGHTER ---- FADES OUT
(FADES IN) That was Just like Jim, Most fellas

would of said they resigned --~- but not Jimt He

STAIR:

MRS :

STAIR:

BOY:

STAIR:

163
wuz a card. He just come right out and said he
wuz fired and made a big Joke outen it. He was
a caution. But---like I was tellin' you--his
wife and kids waited and waited and of course
he didn't show up. {is wife didn't have a dime
with her, or no where else, I guess. So she
finally had to tell the kids it was all off and
they cried like they wasn't never goin' to stop.
Well, it seems, w'ile they was cryin' Doc Stair
came along (FADING OUT) and he asked them-—-
(FADING IN) Why-"Ms. Kendall, what's the ‘
matter with the children? Are they sick?

I don't know, Doctor. Children, stOp your
cryin' and let's go home. C'mon now--it won't
do no good to cry----

What's wrong, here, little fellow, did you eat
too much candy at the circus?

(CRYING) We didn't see the circus---p0p said
he'd take us but he ain't come--and mom says we_
cain't wait no longer--- we been here all day
now---

Why---he probably forgot all about it—--but I'll
tell you what, young fella, I'll take you and
your little sister here and your mother to the
circus---and what's more we'll have peanuts and pop-

corn and ice-cream and everything else you want.

BOY:

GIRL:

IVIUS IC :
BARBER:

164
How about it?
Gosh----that would be swell.
Gee---mthat's better than pOp would have done
anyway----
UP AND OUT
(FADE IN) That's how come Jim always had it in
for Doc Stair. This Doc Stair come here about a
year and a half ago---mighty handsome young fella
and his clothes always look like he has them
made to order. We11---for a wile everybody was
wonderin' why a young doctor like Doc Stair
should come to a town like this where we already
got old Doc Gamble and Doc Foote that's both been
here for years and all the practice in town was
always divided between the two of them. Then
they was a story got around about he'd come here
to hide away and forget about a gal who throwed
him over. He said, himself, there wasn't nothing
like a general practice in a place like ours to
fit a man for all around doctorin'. Anyways-~-
it wasn't long before he was makin' enough to
live on, tho they told me he never dunned nobody
for what they owed him, and when our coroner died,
they picked Doc Stair to take his place. He
didn't want the Job nohow---there ain't no money

in it but he's the kind that can't say no to

PAUL:

MUS IC :

J 13/1 :

PAUL:
J IM 3

BARBER:

165
nothin' if you keep after him long enough. But--
I was goin' to tell about what a good time Jim
used to have with Paul Dickson. This Paul
Dickson, he fell out of a tree when he was about
ten years old. Lit on his head and it done some~
thin' to him and he ain't never been right. No
harm in him, but Just silly. (FADING OUT) You
can imagine what fun Jim used to have with him---
(FADE IN) Hey, cuckoo, come on over here. Now
listen-o-if you'll go down to the Whitefront
Garage and fetch me a left-handed monkey wrench,
I'll give you a quarter.

(FADING OUT) All right, Mr. Kendall, but it'll
take quite a while---it's about half a mile
there.

UP AND OUT

(FADE IN) Hey---cuckoo, we're gonna have a
baseball game between the fats and the leans.
Don't you think that would be fun?

Yes, sir, I'd like to see it.

Well, I'll tell you what to do. You go back
into town to Schraders and get the key to the
pitcher's box. (FADING OUT) Now-—-you hurry ‘.
'cause we want to start.

(FADING IN) They wasn't nothing in the way of

gags that Jim couldn't think up when he put his

PAUL:

JULIE:

BARBER:

166
mind to it. Poor Paul was always kind of sus-
picious of peOple, maybe on account of how Jim
had kept foolin' him. Paul wouldn't have much
to do with anybody only his own mother and Doc
Stair and a girl here in town named Julie Gregg.
Paul used to spend all his time in Doc's office
but when he looked out the Doc's window (FADING
OUT) and seen Julie goin' by to town he'd start
(FADING IN) Miss Julie, Miss Julie, are you
goin' shOppin'?

(LAUGHING) (Why, yes, I am, Paul, would you like
to go along? I'd like it if you could. And we
could stop and get a soda. (FADING OUT) It's
Just nice weather for walking don't you think?
(FADING IN) Doc done all that he could to im-
prove Paul's mind and he told me once that he
really thought the boy was better, that they was
times that he really thought the boy was gettin'
as bright and sensible as anybody. But I was
goin' to tell you about Julie Gregg---she's
pretty near thirty or over--and used to be rich
----went away to school in Chicago and New York
and all and they ain't no subject she can't talk
on. But her old man got to drinkin' and lost
all of his money and when he died he left her

and her invalid mother Just enough to skimp along

SOUND:
JULIE:
BARBER:
JULIE:

STAIR:
JULIE:

BARBER:

167
on and their house. Julie wanted to sell the
house and move away to a city'but her mother said
she'd been born here and she'd die here. It's
kinda hard on Julie 'cause she's too good for the
young folks in this town. But when she seen Doc
Stair it was love at first sight, I guess. (FAD-
ING OUT) I was in his office the day Julie met
the Doc for the first time----

DOOR OPENING AND CLOSING AND BELL JINGLING
Hello, Mr. Green, how's business these days?
Fine, Miss Julie, how's your mother?

That's what I came to see this new doctor about.
I thought maybe he could help her since the other
doctors in town don't seem -----

(FADING IN) How do you do, can I help you, Miss?
Uh---why, yes, that is---it's not for myself----
But (FADING OUT) my mother Just isn't getting any
better.

(FADING IN) I guess it was love at first sight.
It was wrote all over her face that first time she
seen him. Now, Jim.Kendall, besides bein' a Joke-
smith and a pretty good drinker, well, Jim was
quite a lady-killer. They wuz lotsa girls in
town liked him----even if he wuz married. But he
wanted what he couldn't get. He wanted Julie

Gregg and he didn't have no more chance than a

JIM:

BARBER:

SOUND:
JULIE:

JIM:

SOUND:
JIM:

SOUND:
BARBER:

168
rabbit, as his Jokes and all didn't appeal to
her and he was married and all.) She wouldn't
even speak to him on the street but he made no
bones about how he felt. (FADING OUT) Right
in here in front of the whole crowd more than
once he said ------

(FADING IN) Yes, sireee, I'm.stuck on that there
Julie Gregg and (LAUGHING) anybodythat can get
her for me is welcome to my house, my wife and
kids included. (FADING) That Julie is a beaut---
(FADING IN) He finally seen he wasn't gettin'

no wheres with his usual line so he decided to
try the rough stuff. (FADING) He went right

up to her house one evenin' and knocked -----
KNOCKING ON DOOR AND DOOR OPENING
Why---why---Jim.Kendall, what are you.doing
here----

I came to see you, mam. I've been looking at
you a long time and----

YOu take your hands off me----don't touch me.
STRUGGLE AND SLAPS THROUGHOUT

Mighty strong for a little----thing---aren't you,
but I'll hang on---- Ouch---why you little ---
Hey, come back here -----

RUNNING AND DOOR SLAMMING SHUT
(FADING IN) She broke loose and before he could

HOD:

CR OE’ID :

JIM:

BARBER:

JIM:

169
stop her, she run into the next room and locked
the door and phoned to Joe Barnes, the marshal.
Jim could hear who she was phonin' to and he
beat it before Joe got there. Joe went to Jim
the next day and told him what would happen if
he ever done it again. I don't know how it leaked
out -- but Hod Meyers had the nerve to kid him
about it (FADING OUT) one day right there in
this shop----

(FADE IN) well--if it ain't cave-man Jim.hendall
---and how's Julie Gregg-—-got any scratches left
on ya? ‘ 1
LAUGHTER
(LAUGHING A LITTLE) Well, just you wait. ‘Phere's
lots a people that has tried makin' a monkey out
0' me but I always get even. (FADING OUT) Just
wait a bit-—-I'll think up a way to fix her.
(RADING IN) Meanwhile everybody in town was wise
to Julie's bein' wild mad about the Doc. I felt
sorry for her and so did most other people. Now—-
Jim had a trick of changing his voice. He could
imitate anybody with a mite a practice. He waited
till he had Doc Stair's voice down pat; he waited
till he knew the Doc was over in Cartersville
(FADING) and that night he called Julie up--

(0N FILTER) Miss Julie, I must see you tonight.

JULIE:

JIM:

JULIE:
BARBER:

SOUND:
JULIE:
SOUND:
JULIE:

JIM:
JULIE:

CROWD:

170
Why, Doctor, of course, come right over if you
like.
Well, I know this is sort of strange. But I'm
expecting an important long distance call and I
wonder if you wouldn't forget your manners Just
this once and come to my office. No one will see
you and you needn't be afraid and I Just must
talk to you a little while.
(FADING OUT) Why, of course, I'll be right over.
(FADING IN) Doc always keeps a night light in
his office so it looked to Julie like they'was.
somebody there. .Meanwhile, Jim.Kendall had went
to the poolroom.and gathered up everybody who
was sober enough to walk and they went over and
hid underneath the stairs in front of the Doc's
office. (FADING OUT) And pretty soon Julie
came walkin' up to the front door.
KNOCKING ON DOOR
I wonder why he doesn't hear’me----hmmm----
MORE KNOCKING
Well, I guess he's not in---perhaps he had to
leave suddenly..
COUGHS
Oh....is that you, Ralph? (KNOCKS) Ralph, is
that you?
LAUGHTER AND YELLS OF "IS THAT YOU RALPH?

.jélll

MUSIC:
BARBER:

JIM:

BARBER:

JIM:

PAUL:
JIM:

PAUL:
JDM:

171
RALPHIE, DEAR IS THAT YOU"
UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) Poor Julie, she didn't show up here
on Main Street for a long, long time afterward.
Of course, Jim told everybody in town--¢except the
Doc---He was scared to tell him---but Paul Dickson,
that poor cuckoo---he heard Jim talkin' about it
and he ran and tole the Doc. The Doc was out to
get revenge for Julie but it was kind of a
delicate thing because if it got out that he'd
beat Jim.up, Julie was bound to hear of it and .
then she'd KDOW'that Doc knew and it would make
it worse for her than ever. Well, it was a
couple days later when Jim come in (FADING) to
get somebody to go duck-shootin' with him.
(FADING IN) Seen Hod.Meyers---I'm.goin' duck-
shootin' tomorrow and I want him.to go with me.
Hod's went to Carterville and won't be back for
a couple days.
Well, I reckon I won't go then---
I'd like to go with you, Mr. Kendall.
(LAUGHING) Ya would, eh? 'Well, I guess a half-
wit's better than nothin'---Ok, you can go---have
you ever shot a duck?
I ain't never had a gun in my hands.

Well, you can go along and set in the boat and

BARBER:

STAIR:

BARBER:

STAIR:

BARBER:

(PAUL?

172
watch and if you're good I might lend you a
couple 0' shots. (FADING OUT) Well, I'll meet
you on the corner at six tomorrOW'monning.,
(FADE IN) ‘Well, I hadn't been open more than
ten minutes the next morning when Doc Stair come
1n--- (FADE OUT)
(FADE ON) Have you seen.Paul Dickson?
No, but I know he's out shootin' with Jim
Kendall.
That's what I heard but I can't understand it...
He said he wasn't ever going to have anything
to do with Jim.Kendall. He told me about the
joke on.miss Julie and asked me what I thought
of it and I told him that anybody that would do
a thing like that ought not to be let live.
Paul shouldn't go off with that kind of man.
(FADING OUT) I must find him.
(FADING IN) At noon the doc got a call from
old John Scott. Paul had come runnin' up to his
place and said they'd been a accident.
(FADING IN) I----l---was watchin"Mr. Kendall
shoot and he asked me if I wanted to try---and--
and I hadn't never handled a gun and I was so
scared---that I was shakin' and----I fired and
(CRIES) Mr. Kendall fell down in the bottom
of the boat---- (FADE OUT) I didn't mean it.

BARBER:

STAIR:

BARBER:

MUSIC:
'ANN:

173
'Course, the Doc, bein' the coroner, went right
out and (FADING) when he seen it he said----
(FADE IN) Well, we might as well take thebody
back to town., There's no use leaving it here or
calling a jury. It's a plain case of accidental
shooting. (FADING) Well, let's get the body
back to town----
(FADING IN) Well, that's the way it wuz.
Personally, I wouldn't never leave a person shoot
a gun in the same boat I wuz in unless I wuz
sure they knew somethin' about guns. Jim was a
sucker to leave a new beginner have his gun,
let alone a half-wit. it probably served Jim
right, what he got. But we miss him 'round here.
Comb it wet or dry?
UP AND OUT
Stock Closing----

174

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Lardner's Haircut

Reasons for Adaptation

Any discussion of the modern American short story
should have something of Ring Lardner's in it, since he is
one of our best known and most widely imitated writers. One
of his most famous stories is Haircut and it is typical of
him” It is an excellent representation of small-town life
and attitude, which was another reason that I chose to
include it.
Adaptatiqnggroblemg

There were no very'serious‘problems as the story lent
itself readily to dramatization. The narrative device was
inherent in the original story. If it had been omitted in
the adaptation, there would have been no reason for using
the story at all. Thus, the script format was no problem.
Dramatization of the flash-backs was no more of a problem
than dramatization of any type of exposition and description.
In other words, the problems were usual and not difficult
to solve.
Casting and Acting

In casting, the barber must be ignorant but kindly.
His ignorance is his excuse for his somewhat perverted sense
of humor. He means to be kind but hasn't the intelligence

or sensitivity to comprehend cruelty of the sort that Jim

175

Kendall handed out. He must not be played coldly or the
irony of the story will be lost, as will the wonderful
characterization. Jim, on the other hand, is also ignorant,
but his ignorance is no excuse for his behavior. He is a
bully and he knows it. He is not Just a "smart aleck" but
is a truly cruel person and, to him, cruelty is funny.
Avoid, however, casting him.as a straight heavy. Remember
he is not ignorantly cruel for the sake of humor but is
cruel because cruelty is humorous.
.8229.

The sound throughout is perfectly standard.
Script Changes

There were only a few line-cuts for the sake of timing.
No other changes were needed. Perhaps one reason for this
could be that more than the usual amount of the author's
wording and sequence was maintained and so the script was

unusually compact and offered no acting or action problems.

ANN:

MUSIC:

MAID:

MRS. T:

JER:

Nu.” o T:

JER:

LITE—{S o T :

JER:

MRS. T:

JER:

MRS. T:

176
JANE
By Somerset Maugham
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening --- Somerset Maughamfs ---
igag --- .
UP AND OUT
(OFF MIKE) Mr. Frame, madame.
Oh---Jerry, how nice of you to come. Come in--—
come in. Sit down, you dear boy. My you have
been away too long this time, you know.
Indeed---it's good to be back. You're looking
wonderful, Mrs. Tower, not a day older.
Ah--ah---Jerry. After two years you can say
that to an old woman of forty?
(LAUGHING) Forty hardly seems such a formidable
age to me.
Of course, all women take five years off, you
know.
Really---I didn't know but even so-—-
And then, of course, I dye my hair. -- Oh, I
make no secret of it. One has to keep up and
hair graying is so drab. When mine turns quite
white I shall stOp dying. But—--now that you're
back, Jerry, you must come to dinner. How about
a week from Thursday?
No one shuns a dinner of yours, Marion.

Hmmy-good--now whom would you like to meet?

JER:

MRS. T:

JER:
MRS. T:

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MRS. T:

177
Still the same, aren't you? London's elite still
tr00ps to your welcome mat.
Well, not exactly but I like well assorted gather-
ings. Now, let's see--- Oh, there's only one
thing I must tell you. If Jane Fowler is still
here, I shall have to put it off.
Who is Jane Fowler?
She's my Cross. Do you remember a photograph
that I used to have on the piano---before I had
my room.done over --- of a woman in a tight dress

with tight sleeves and a gold locket, with her

.hair drawn back from.a broad forehead and her

ears showing and Spectacles on a rather blunt
nose? ‘Well, that was Jane Fowler.

You don't make her sound very appetizing.

She isn't. She's worthy, she's dowdy, she's
provincial. She looks twenty years older than

I do and she's quite capable of telling everyone
she meets that we were at school together. She
always stays with me when she comes to London...
and it's deadly. I'm.ashamed to take her any
place with.me. But she's so very kind, I haven't
the heart to be rude to her. She's tremendously
rich and she's always buying things for me ---
things I'd never use because, of course, she has

no taste, but you see what I mean. She bores me

JER:

MRS .

T:

SOUND:

MAID:

JANE:

MAID:

MRS.

JANE:

MRS.

JANE:

AIRS o

LIUSIC :

178
to death but I wouldn't for anything let her
suspect it.

And when does she arrive?

Tomorrow. I hope for not too long a visit.
DOOR BELL RINGING
(OFF MIKE) Come in, madame---we weren't eXpect-
you today.
(OFF MIKE) Oh, weren't you?

Mrs. Fowler, madame.

Jane: I wasn't expecting you today.
So your maid was just telling me. I certainly
said today in my letter.

Well, it doesn't matter. I'm very glad to see
you whenever you come. Fortunately, I'm doing
nothing this evening.
You mustn't let me give you any trouble. If-I
can have a boiled egg for my dinner that's all
I shall want.

Oh---I think we can

(ANNOYED) A boiled egg!

do a little better13han that. But---now--won't
you have a cup of tea?

If it isn't too much trouble.
Of course not, the tea things are right here.
here. (FADING) Oh, Jane, I forgot to introduce
Mr. Frame---he's just back from a long trip—---

LIGHT...UP FAST AND OUT

SOUND:
JER:
MRS. T:
MUSIC:
MRS. T:
JER:
MRS. T:
JER:
MRS. T:
JANE:

179
TELEPHONE RINGING
Hello.
(ON FILTER) Jerry, I have the most marvelous
news for you---Jane is going to be married. Her
fiance is coming for dinner tonight and I want
you to come, too. You'll be a god-send because,
can you imagine the sort of man Jane would marry?
My dear, I think it's too rare. Well---(FADING)
I'll eXpect you for dinner then---around eight
o'clock.
UP AND OUT
(FADING ON) I'm glad you came, Jerry. Jane is
putting the finishing touches to her appearance.
I'm longing for you to see her. She's all in a
flutter. She says he's an architect and that he
adores her. His name is Gilbert and when she
speaks of him her voice gets all funny and
tremulous. It makes me want to laugh.
I wonder what he's like?
Oh, I'm.sure I know; Very big and massive, with
a bald head and an immense tummy. A large, fat,
clean-shaven, red face and a booming voice.
Oh, here is Mrs. Fowler now.
Yes, how nice you look, Jane---only why didn't
you have that dress out a little lower?
Hello, Mr. Frame. Oh, I don't like that sort of

MRS. T:

JANE:

JER:
JANE:
MRS. T:

JANE:

GIL:
MAID:
MRS. T:
MUSIC:
JANE:

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180
thing---and my dressmaker in Liverpool has---
(INTERRUPTING) But you really have quite a pretty
neck, Jane.
Thank you. Has Marion told you my news, Mr.
Frame?

I must congratulate you.

Wait to do that till you've seen my young man.
I think it's too sweet to hear you talk of your
"young man".

Don't expect anyone too old. You wouldn't want
me to marry a decrepit old gentleman with one_
foot in the grave would you?

Mr. Gilbert Napier.

(FADING IN) Good evening, everyone.

This is my young man, Marion ander. Frame.
(VERY MUCH ASTONISHED) How do you do---but---
I know you'll like him, Marion. There's no one
enjoys good food more than he does. Marion's
dinners are famous, Gilbert.

I know.
(OFF MIKE) Dinner is served.

Shall we go in?

UP FAST AND SEGUE INTO TABLE NOISES
(FADING IN) YOu've got a very high color, Marion,
aren't you well?

I dressed in a hurry. I daresay I put on too

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

JANE:

JER:

JANE:

JER:

JANE:

181
much rouge.
Ohhh--is it rouge. I thought it was natural.
Otherwise I shouldn't have mentioned it. You
know, Gilbert, Marion and I were at school
together. You'd never think it to look at us
now, would you? But, of course, I've lived a
very quiet life.
(ANGRY) Well, we shall neither of us ever see
fifty again, Jane.
Gilbert says I mustn't acknowledge to more than
forty-nine for his sake.
There is, of course, a disparity of age between
you.
Twenty-seven years. Do you think that's too
much? Gilbert says I'm young for my age. I
told you I shouldn't like to marry a man with
one foot in the grave.
I suppose you're very busy buying your trousseau?
No, I wanted to get my things from.my dressmaker
in Liverpool but Gilbert won't let me. He's
very masterful and, of course, he has wonderful
taste. We're going to Paris on our honeymoon
and we'll get my clothes there.
Do you expect to be away long?
Gilbert has arranged with his office to stay away

for six months. It's wonderful--you see he's

MRS. T:
JANE:
MRS. T:
MUSIC:
MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:
JANE:

182
never had more than a fortnight's holiday before.
Why not?

He's never been able to afford it, poor dear.

Ah:
UP AND OUT
(FADING IN) Now that your "young man" is gone,

Jane, I want to talk to you.
What about. Don't you like him?

Have you gone crazy, Jane?

Not more than most peOple who don't habitually
live in a lunatic asylum, I trust.

May I ask why you're going to marry this young
man?

Partly because he won't take no for an answer.
He's asked me five times and I grew positively
tired of refusing him.

And why do you think he's so anxious to marry
you?

I amuse him.

The fact that you're rich and he's penniless
couldn't have anything to do with it, could it?
Jane, don't act like a besotted fool.

I don't think money has anything to do with it.
I think he's very fond of me, you know.

You're an old woman, Jane.

I'm.the same age as you are, Marion.

MRS. T:

JANE:
MRS. T:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

183
I've never let myself go. I'm very young for
my age. No one would think me over forty.
But even I wouldn't dream of marrying a boy
twenty years younger than myself.
Twenty-seven.
Oh! Really, Jane, you're the last person I
should ever have thought likely to fall in love
with a boy young enough to be your son.
But I'm not in love with him. I've told him
that. Of course I like him.very much or I
wouldn't think of marrying him. I thought it.
only fair to tell him quite plainly what my
feelings toward him are.
Oh---oh-—-well, if you're not in love with him
why do you want to marry him?
I've been a widow a long time and I've had a
very quiet life. I thought I'd like a change.
If you Just want to get married, why don't you
marry a man your own age?
(LAUGHING) No man my own age has asked me five
times. In fact, no man my own age has asked me
at all. And-~we've decided that if either of
us wants his liberty, the other will place no
obstacles in his way.
How much has he persuaded you to settle on him?

I wanted to settle a thousand a year on him, but

MRS. T:
JANE:

MRS. T:

JANE:

MRS. T:
MUSIC:

JER:
MRS. T:

JER:

184
he wouldn't hear of it. He was quite upset when
I made the suggestion. He says he can earn quite
enough for his own needs.

He's more cunning than I thought.

You see, my dear, it's different for you. 'You've
never been so very much a widow, have you?

What? Why---why---really, Jane. How dare you---
well! I'm.much too upset to talk about it now.

I really must go to bed. We'll resume the con-
versation tomorrow morning.

I'm afraid that won't be very convenient. Gilbert
and I are going to get the license tomorrow morn-
ing.

Ohhhh!

WEDDING MARCH UP AND OUT

(FADING IN) Come in, Jerry, and have some tea.
We need it after that wedding. How long do you
give it? Six months?

Let's hOpe for the best.

Don't be absurd. Of course it can't last. She's
old and dowdy and dull.

Are you sure she's dull? What she says is really
pretty much to the point.

I've never heard her make a Joke in all my life.
(TEASING) By the time I see you again, I'll

wager they will have separated long since. After

MUSIC:

SOUND:

JER:

MRS.
JER:
MRS.

JER:

MRS.

MRS.

JER:

T:

MRS:T:

JER:

185

all, you neglected me for two years before---
(FADING) You'll probably do it again.

UP AND OUT

CROWD AND TABLE NOISES KEPT UNDER THROUGHOUT
(FADING IN) Marion, imagine finding myself
seated next to you. I've been so dazed by all

the celebrities here that I hadn't looked about

much.

Jerry, dear boy, hOW'gOOd to see you. And after
two years, too. How have you been?

Excellent. Just got back a week ago. How is

London these days? QH---and how is Jane?
She's very well.
How has the marriage turned out?

It appears to be quite a success.

You were wrong, then?

I said it wouldn't last and I still say it won't.
It's contrary to human nature.

Is she happy?

They're both happy.

I suppose you don't see very much of them?

At first I saw quitea lot of them... But now--
Jane is becoming very grand.

What do you.mean?

I think I should tell you that she's here tonight.

Here? Among all these celebrities?

MRS. T:

MRS. T:

JER:

*i‘JiS 0 II‘ :
CROWD:
VOICE:

MRS. T:

186
Look-—-there between Admiral Frobisher and Lord
Frontan.
YOu mean that woman there with the very short
curly grey hair?
Gilbert got her to cut it.
I can't believe it. In that outrageous dress--
that's your friend, Jane... in a gown cut that
low?
Gilbert designs her clothes. He makes them so
different that no one else could cOpy them.
They only suit her. He had to. All of London
was c0pying her clothes.
She is stunning--no doubt about it. And the
monocle. What an improvement over those gold
rimmed spectacles.
Gilbert said so, too.
OFF MIKE -—-- MUCH LAUGHTER
Mrs. Napier has made another Joke, Mrs. Tower.
Jane is priceless, isn't she?
I don't understand it. Granted she looks extreme-
ly striking but that isn't enough to explain why
Jane is here tonight amid this crowd of duchesses,
cabinet ministers and such. Nor why she's sitting
between our host and the Admiral of the Fleet.
Jane is a humorist. Don't you hear them.all laugh-

ing at what she said. I am here tonight, not

JER:

MRS. T:

JER:

MRS. T:
JER:

MRS. T:

JER:

MUSIC:
SOUND:

MRS. T:

187
because I've known our hostess for twenty years
and have asked her to dinner a hundred times,
but because I'm Jane's friend.

(CONSOLINGLY) PeOple can never resist those who
make them laugh.

She never makes me laugh.

Do you mean to say that you're the only person
who doesn't think she's funny?

Had it struck you that she was a humorist?

I'm bound to say it hadn't.

She says just the same things she's said for the
last thirty-five years. i laugh when I see every-
Ione else does because I don't want to seem a
perfect fool, but I am not amused.

I'm eager to renew my acquaintance.

I'll get her to ask you to her Tuesdays. They're
the best parties in London. You'll meet everyone
you ever heard of there. She's done in one year
what I failed to do in twenty. The admiral is
always there and he's just the least.
UP AND OUT

DOOR BELL RINGING

(FADING IN) Jerri, Jerry, I'm so glad you could
come.

Is anything wrong?

Wrong? I should say. Gilbert is leaving Jane.

JER:

MRS. T:

JER:

MRS. T:

JER:

MRS. T:

18mmD:
GIL:

MRS. T:

GIL:

188
How do you know?
He just rang me up and said he was coming right
over.
Well, that doesn't necessarily mean---
It's just as I always knew it would be.
Why I've never seen a more devoted couple and
I've seen a good deal of them these past few
months.
Nonsense. Gilbert is twenty-seven now. It's
just time for a pretty girl to come along. Did
you notice the other evening at Jane's that pretty
little niece of Admiral Reginald Frobisher's?
I thought Jane was looking at them with a good
deal of attention and I wondered myself.
I don't believe Jane fears the rivalry of any
girl under the sun.
You'll see. Ah--here he comes now.
DOOR BELL RINGS AND DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
(OFF MIKE) Thank you---I'm.eXpected. (FADING
IN) Marion, Jane has left me.
Ah---I knew you'd behave like a gentleman. It
would have been dreadful for her for people to
think that you had left her.
I've come to you because I knew I could count on

you for sympathy.
Oh, I don't blame you, Gilbert, it was bound to

GIL:

IVLLIS o

GIL:

{Vii-{S o

GIL:

MRS.

GIL:

MKS o

GIL:

GIL:

*3

T:

189
happen.
I suppose so. I couldn't hOpe to keep her always.
She was too wonderful and I'm a perfectly common—
place fellow.
How sweet of you to act like this. But you
needn't with me. And what is going to happen now?
Well, she's going to divorce me.
Jane always said she'd put no obstacle in your
way if ever you wanted to marry a girl.
You don't think it's likely I should ever be will-
ing to marry anyone else after being Jane's
husband?
Of course, you mean that you've left Jane.
I? That's the last thing I should ever do.
Then why is she divorcing you?
She's going to marry the Admiral, Sir Reginald
Frobisher, as soon as the decree is made absolute.
I say, after all you've done for her?
I've done nothing for her.
Do you mean to say you're going to allow your-
self to be made use of like that?
We arranged before we were married that if either
of us wanted his liberty, the other would put
no hindrance in the way.
But that was done on your account because you're

twenty-seven years younger.

GIL:

SOUND:
MRS. T:

JER:

SOUND:
JER:

JANE:

IVES. T:

JANE:

190
Well, it's come in very useful for her. Well,
I must go. Goodbye, both of you, and thank you.
(FADING) I'll see you when I feel better.
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSdS *
(GASPING) Goodbye, Gilbert, well I never.
There, there, Narion, pull yourself together.
(FADING) I'll get you a drink--- Oh, I say,
here comes Jane now. Oh---I've never seen her
look so amazing. I'll get the door.
DOOR OPENS
(OFF MIKE) Hello, Jane.

(OFF MIKE) Why, Jerry. How nice that you're

here. (FADING ON) Why, Marion, what on earth
is the matter with you?

Gilbert was here.

Yes, I know. I told him to come and see you.
I'm going to Paris tonight and I want you to be
very kind to him while I'm away--- I'm.afraid,
just at first, he'll be rather lonely and I shall
feel more comfortable if you'll take care of him.
Gilbert has Just told me something that I can
hardly bring myself to believe. He tells me
that you're going to divorce him to marry Reginald
Frobisher.

You always said I should marry a man my own age.

The Admiral is fifty-three.

191
1R8. T: But, Jane, you owe everything to Gilbert. You
wouldn't exist without him. Without him to

design your clothes, you'll be nothing.

JANE: Oh, he's promised to go on designing my clothes.
MRS. T: How can you be so heartless?
JANE: But I never loved Gilbert. I always told him

.that. I'm.beginning to feel the need of companion-
ship of a man my own age. I think I've probably
been married to Gilbert long enough. The young
have no conversation. Of course, I shan't lose
sight of Gilbert. I've arranged that with Reginald.
He has a niece that would just suit Gilbert and
as soon as we're married we'll arrange for the
youngsters to fall in love.

MRS. T: Hummmph! And have you arranged with the admiral
that if you should want your liberty neither
should put any hindrance in the way of the other.

JANE: I suggested it but the admiral says he knows a
good thing when he sees it and he won't want to
marry anyone else and if anyone wants to marry
me---he has eight twelve—inch guns on his flag-
ship and he'll discuss the matter at close range.
I think the admiral's a very passionate man.

JER: , (LAUGHS)

Mrs. T: Don't laugh, Jerry. I never thought you funny,

Jane. I never understood why peOple laughed at

JANE:

JER:

JANE:

MRS. T:
JANE:

MUSIC:

ANN:

192
things you said.
I never thought I was funny myself, Marion. I'm
glad to leave London before too many peOple come
around to our opinion.
I wish you'd tell me the secret of your astonish-
ing success.
You know, when I married Gilbert and settled in
London and people began to laugh at what I said,
no one was more surprised than I. I'd said the
same things for thirty years and no one ever
laughed. I thought it must be my clothes or my
bobbed hair or my eye glass. Then I discovered
it was because I spoke the truth. It was so
unusual that people thought it humorous. One of
these days some one else will discover the secret
and when people habitually tell the truth, of
course, there'll be nothing funny in it.
And why am I the only person not to think it funny?
Perhaps, Marion, you don't know the truth when
you see it.
UP AND OUT
Stock Closing ----

193

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Maugham's Jane

Reasons for Adaptation

 

Maugham.is considered by many to be one of the very
greatest of our modern writers. He is vastly cOpied every
where and his works are perhaps the best examples of the
modern classic type of literature. Jgne is one of his best
characterizations. In addition, it displays well Maugham's
particular kind of subtle humor, which is one of the out-
standing attributes of much of his work. Also, its characters
are representatives of the so-called upper class about whom
he most often writes.

Problems of Adaptation

The problem was to shorten the story so it could fit
into a short script without losing the atmosphere. Thus, it
was necessary to include much conversation that was not direct—
ly relevant to the action, but was really the essence of the
story. Too, much time had to be spent in characterization
which again, does not bear directly on the action but is
preparing for the action. (The script could be cut down to
seven minutes and the story still be told. But, the spirit.
of Maugham.would be gone and it was that that made it worth
doing. The problem was to get an equitable distribution of
detail for atmosphere and character and still tell the story

completely. Thus, it was a problem of selection and not an

easy one.

194

Casting and Acting

 

In casting, it is well to bear in mind that mrs. Towers
should not be played as an out-and-out villain. That would
make her too simple. She's jealous but she's a nice person,
though not a very perceptive one. She is seldom really
unkind, nasty or sarcastic but is often bewildered and this
bewilderment leads her to sarcasm.

Jane should have a soft, pleasant voice. She must be
consistent throughout the script. Don't cast a colorless
voice. On the other hand, she is not a sarcastic person
and she is not confused. She is simply patient and kindly
throughout and, even in the beginning, understands her
friend much better than she, herself, is understood. however,
that should not be too apparent in the playing of the very
first part of the script. If Jane is not correctly played
in the beginning, the change to her new self will be an
abrupt one and, actually, it was not. Her husband didn't
change her, he just brought her out. If this isn't made
clear, much of the point of the story will be lost.

Jerry Frame should be played impartially. In casting,
get a strong,attractive voice, with a touch of humor, but
don't let him sound too interested as he plays it. he is
not, at any time, active in the affair, nor does he, at

any time, care too greatly about it. He is interested, but

that is all.

195
In casting, be sure to get a good contrast in the
women's voices.
M ,
Very standard.

Script Changes

 

All script changes were made for the sake of cutting
down on the playing time of the show and they were simply

omissions of bits of conversation throughout.

ANN:

MUSIC:
SOUND:

MRS. B:

MR. 0:

MRS. B:

MR. 0:

MRS. B:

MR. 0:

SOUND:
MRS. B:

196

NIGHT CLUB
By Katherine Brush

Adapted by'M. J. Martin
Stock Opening ---- Katherine Brush's --- Nighg
‘ngg ----
THEME UP AND OUT
FADE IN TRAFFIC AND STREET SOUNDS IN BACKGROUND
....DOORMAN WHISTLING ON MIKE
(FADING IN) Well, Mr. O'Brien, aren't you gonna
open the door for me?

(STOPS WHISTLING) Oh---Mrs. Brady, I didn't see

ya.

Good thing it was me, Mr. O'Brien,and not one of
the customers---you'd get no tip at all.
(LAUGHING) That's right but it's a little early
for the people to start comin' after the theatre.
Besides, they don't walk here.

Doesn't look like there'll be much of a crowd in
the club tonight. Paper says it'll rain.

I believe it will at that, Mrs. Brady. But there'll
be enough here. What I don't like is gettin' all
wet helpin' em.out o' the taxis. Well--in ya go,
Mrs. Brady (FADING) Hope ya have a good night of
it.

STREET NOISES FADE OUT UNDER NEXT SENTENCE

(CALLING) Good night? I never have one of those

LENA:
MRS. B:

LENA:
MRS. B:

LENA:
MRS. B:

MRS. B:

197
in this place. (TO HERSELF - PANTING) 0h---
these stairs. Wear me out every time.

(OFF MIKE) Late again,.Mrs. Brady.

(STILL CLIMBING) Go wan, it's only ten to ten.
Whew! Them.stairs. Ugh---leave me rest here a
minute, Lena. Them.stairs with my bad heart will
be the death of me. Feel my heart.

Yeah.---It is goin' some.

Yep, they'll kill me. Whew! Well, dearie, what's
the news?

You got a paper.

Yeah! I got a paper (SOUND OF PAPER SLAPPING ON
COUNTER) An' a lot of time I'll get to read my
paper, won't I, now? On a Saturday night. Other
nights is bad enough, dear knows---but Saturday
nights: How I dread 'em} Every Saturday night

I say to my daughter, I say, "Geraldine, I can't,"
I say, "I can't go through it again, an' that's
all there is to it," I say, "I'll quit," I say.
An' I will too --- sometime.

‘Well, ya gotta admit,.Mrs. Brady, that the tips
are good on Saturday.

Tips: I Just wish'ygg had to spend one Saturday
night, Just one, in that wash room} Bein' pushed
an' stepped on and near knocked down by that

gang of hussies, an' them orderin' and bossin'

LENA:
MRS. B:

SOUND:
MRS. B:
SOUND:
MRS. B:

SOUND:

MRS. B:
SOUND:°
MRS. B:

SOUND:
MRS. B:
SOUND:

198
you around -—- like you was dirt, an usin' your
things an' then sayin' they're sorry, they got
no change, they'll be back. Yeah, they pgzg; come
back. You got all the best of it takin' the hats-
--the men tip good---but the women---bah!
(WHISPERING) There's Mr. Costello.
(CHEERFULLY) Well, as I was sayin', I got to
Ten to ten—--time I was on the Job.

(CALLING)

leave you.

(CALLING) See ya later. Good evenin',
Mr. Costello, hOpe business is good tonight. (T0
SELF) The old slave-driver--- Ah here we are---
DOOR OPENS ' '
(CONTINUING) Just because he's manager.

DOOR CLOSES

Now let's see---got to get things in order. Hmmm--
the cupboard.

KEYS RATTLING

Hmm, where's the key? Ah, guess this is it.
KEY BEING TURNED IN LOCK AND METAL DOOR OPENING
Now, my apern. Hmmm---better lock that again or
somebody'll steal my coat. SnooPy females wouldn't
even stay outa my cupboard.
DOOR CLOSED AND LOCKED.
Now-~fer the makeup---

KEY TURNS AND DRAWER OPENS....THEN SOUND OF JARS

AND BOXES BEING SET OUT

SOUND:

MRS. B:

SOUND:

SOUND:

BRUN:

SOUND:
BRUN:

MRS. B:

BRUN:

MRS. B:

199
(COUNTING OVER) Here's the powder and rouge,
lipstick---need some more orange, I guess, eye
shadow, mascara, nail polish--- The way they paint
these days--- He! a bottle missin' somebody
swiped that last bottle of polish---oh-e-here it
is. Hairpins, sewin' kit, bromo seltzer, sodium
bicarb, ammonia~~~somebody's sure to get sick,
always do---the hussies---and now the tip tray.
Ha: Lotta good it'll do! Here---I'll put some
money in it--
MONEY CLINKING ON CHINA
Couple quarters, couple dimes --- not that any
of 'em'll leave quarters!
MUSIC BEGINS IN BACKGROUND.... YOU'LL NEVER
ENQW, ETC.
Well, I guess I'm ready for 'em now.
DOOR OPENS --- MUSIC GROWS LOUDER...DOOR CLOSES...
MUSIC FADES UNDER
(FADES IN SINGING) You'll never know Just how
much I love you --- you'll never know Just how
much I care---
CHAIR BEING PULLED OUT
Miss, will you take my wrap? ‘
Yes, ma'm, here, I'll put it on the divan.
Thanks.

Is there anything I can get you, mam?

BRUN:

MRS. B:
BRUN:
SOUND:

BRUN:

MRS. B:

BRUN:

SOUND:
BRUN:

SOUND:

200
No thanks, you seem to have everything here.
(GOES ON HUMMING A FEW SECONDS) There, guess
that's all right. Oh--is my back powdered?
Here, I'll touch it up for you.
Thanks.
SILVER CLINKING ON CHINA...CHAIR SCRAPING
Oh, I forgot something. Darn...I can't get
this ring off.
(FADING OUT) Just a minute. (FADING IN)
Here put a little soap on your finger.
There! That does it. Now I'll tie it in
this hankie and slip it in here --- and --
it'll never show.
ANOTHER COIN DROPPED
(FADING) There you are...
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS...DOOR CLOSES..
MUSIC FADES
Ah! Fifty cents...not so bad.
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS
(FADING IN) Come on, Amy, you look awful.
DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC FADES
(FADING IN) I know it, Vera, I feel awful.
Amy, what under the sun happened?
Nothing. I Just don't feel good.
That's nonsense. Here, sit down.and tell me.

Was it something she said? She's so tactless—--

AMY:

VERA:

AMY:

VERA:

AMY:

AMY:

VERA:

201
always was.
No, not anything she said. It was... All right
I'll tell you. Before we left your apartment I
Just happened to notice that Tom.had disappeared,
so, I went to look for him---I wanted to ask him
if he'd remembered to tell the maid where we were
going --- Skippy's subject to croup, you know,
and we always leave word. Well, so I went into
the kitchen, thinking Tom.might be there mixing
cocktails---and there he was-—-and there she was!
Well?
He was kissing her.
Well, you're surely not going to let Egg; spoil
your whole evening? Amy, dear! Kissing may
once have been serious and significant -- but
”it isn't nowadays. Nowadays, it's like shaking
hands. It means nothing.
I hate her--—red headed thing! Calling me,
"darling", and,"honey", and s—sending me hand-
kerchiefs for C-Christmas—-and then sneaking
off behind closed doors and k-kissing my h-h-hus-
band. (SOBS) I'd like to slap her!
Oh, oh, oh, I wouldn't do that!

Well, what would you do, Vera? If you were 1?

I'd forget it and have a good time. I'd kiss

somebody myself. You've no idea how much better

ALLEY !
SOUND:

ANY:

SYLVIA:

VERA:

SYLVIA:

AMY:

SOUND:

VERA:

202
you'd feel!
I don't do---
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES..MUSIC SHELLS AND FADES
(CONTINUING) Oh, hello. We were wondering
what had become of you.

(FADING IN) Tom and I were talking to Fiddle

Baer. He's going to play Smoke Gets In You;

Eyes next, because it's my favorite. Lend me

a comb, will you?

Use the maid's comb there.

Use that? Nothing doing! Amy, darling, haven't
you one?

Yes, but don't forget to bring it when you come
(FADING) I'm going on out. I want to tell
Tom.something.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES...MUSIC SWELLS AND FADES
Now that Amy's gone I want to talk to you,
Sylvia. There is one thing that I want under-

stood and that is, "HANDS OFF". Do you hear me?
I don't know what you mean.

You do know what I mean!

Amy told you she saw us, I suppose.

Precisely. And (FADING) as I said before, you're
(OFF MIKE) Because, Tomfs Amy's

to keep away.

husband, but, as you very well know---he belongs

to me!

SOUND:

SYLVIA:
SOUND:

SOUND:

CROWD:

GIRL l:
[GIRL 2:
GIRL 3:
GIRL l:
ALMOST
GIRL 2:IN
UNISON
GIRL 3:

SOUND:
MRS. B:
SOUND:
MRS. B:

SOUND:

JEAN:

203
DOOR OPENS --- MUSIC SWELLS...DOOR CLOSES...
MUSIC FADES UNDER
Well, we'll see about that!
MONEY CLANKS...DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS AND
FADES UNDER AS DOOR CLOSES
Well, at least one of them left a tip, not
much though.
DOOR OPENS AND MUSIC UP AND DOWN WHEN DOOR
CLOSES
GIRLS FADE IN BABBLING.. .CONVERSATION IN BACK-
GROUND UNDER FOLLOWING

(FADING IN) Maid, please fix me a bromor--- v/

(FAST FADE IN) Maid, have you any more lipstick?
(FAST FADE IN) Maid, sew this seam, will you?
Where's that bromo?

Maid, this isn't the lipstick I want.

Are you finished with that seam?

BROAD FADE DOWN AND OUT FOR A FEW SECONDS...FADE
INTO MUSIC UP AND FULL

(CALLING) Thank you, mam.

DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC FADES

Phew! A little let-up. The last two hours was

a terror. Them women!
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS...DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC
FADES

(OFF MIKE) Maid!

MRS. B:
JEAN:

JEAN:

MRS. B:
JEAN:
MRS. B:
JEAN:
MRS. B:
JEAN:
.MRS. B:
JEAN:

SOUND:
MRS. B:

JEAN:

MRS. B:

JEAN:
SOUND:

JEAN:
SOUND:

204
Yes, miss.
(STILL OFF MIKE) Please come here.
I'm coming.
(FADING IN) Listen! Is there any way I can get
out of here except through this door I came in?
No, miss, there ain't.
Any window? What about that window?
That's all the farther it Opens.
Oh, and it's the only one, isn't it?
It is.
Then--there's no way out?
No way but the door.
Peek out that door, will you and see if there's
anyone still standing there.
DOOR OPENS AND .CLOSES...MUSIC SWELLS AND FADES
Yes, a man with a black moustache.
Oh, well, I can't stay here all night, that's one
sure thing. ‘Well (FADING) I'll put some makeup
on, anyway.
That's a good idea. Just use anything you want.
Here's a new shade of lipstick.
Thanks
SOUND OF BOXES BEING PICKED UP (ONE OR TWO) AND
SET DOWN
There---ok---(FADING) Thanks a lot.
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS...DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC

MRS. B:

SOUND:
CROWD:

HELEN:

IRENE:

SOUND:
HELEN:

KAY:

BABE:
JOAN:
KAY:

IRENE:

BABE:

KAY:

IRENE:
JOAN:

205
FADES UNDER
Two dollars! Say---she's all right. Oh, but
she took-—-now what for did she want to walk
off with them scissors?
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS...
BABBLING GIRLS FADE IN KEEPING EKCLAMATIONS IN
BACKGROUND
(FADING IN) But, Babe, you can't get married
in this state unless--¥-
(FADING IN) Well, you can in.Maryland, Jimmy
says. ‘
DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC FADES UNDER...BABBLE CONTINUES
Oh, there must be some place nearer than that--—
Isn't this marvelous? When did it happen, Babe?
When did you decide?
Just now-e-when we were dancing.
But listen, Babe, what'll your mother and father..
Oh, never mind, let's hurry.
Shall we be warm enough with Just these thin wraps,
do you think? Babe, will you be warm enough?
Sure?
My pearls are old. And my dress and my slippers
are new. Now, let's see---what can I borrow.
Here's my hanky---
Take these earrings-~-

Take my diamond bar-pin.

BABE:
HELEN:

BABE:

HELEN:

JOAN:

HELEN:

JOAN:
CROWD:

MRS. B:

SOUND:
DEE:

MARILEE:
DEE:
MARILEE:

DEE:

206
Oh--that pin would look lovely on my wrap.
I've got blue garters.
That fixes that.

Give me one, then. There!

Hurry! Hurry up! Listen are you sure we'll

be warm enough? Because we can stop at my

'house, there's nobody home.

Oh, we're all right. Give me that puff, Babe.
I'll powder your back.

Just think, a week ago you'd never even met
each other! Oh, hurry up, let's get started.

I'm ready.

So 'm I. Ready, Babe? (FADING) C'mon every-
body.
(FADING) You look adorable, Babe.

...BABBLE CUT WHEN DOOR CLOSES AND MUSIC FADES
Well, they certainly made a mess out of things

in here.

DOOR OPENS...MUSIC UP

(FADING IN) C'mon, Marilee, I want to talk to
you.
(FADING IN) I'm.right behind you.

Well? How do you like him?
Oh-h-h, all right.
Meaning, "Not any", hmmmm? I suspected as much!

See here, Marilee, are you going to be a darned

MARILEE:

MARILEE:
DEE:
MARILEE:
DEE:

MARILEE:
DEE:

MARILEE:

DEE:

207
fool all your life? You've got to get married
sometime, anyway, you might as well be smart
about it. If you play your cards right, he'll
ask you, I know it. .

He's fat. Fat, and---greasy, sort of. I mean,
greasy in his mind. Don't you know what I mean?
I know one thing. I kn0W'WhO He Is! And if I
were you that's all I'd need to know---under the
circumstances.

I know---she's worse.

Worse?

Yes.

Well, there you are. It's the clhmate. She'll
never be anything but worse, if she doesn't get
away. Out West, Arizona or somewhere.

I know.

Of course, suit yourself. She's not my sister.
No, of course she isn't---you're right---only
(CHANGING TONE) Oh, well, I guess it doesn't
matter. Well, come on. It's almost one o'clock.
We don't want to miss Vans and Moreno. After
all, that's what we came for, isn't it. Besides
Mr.--uh--I mean Jim, told us to hurry back.
That's the girl. I'll say we don't wanta miss
Vane and.Moreno and it's a rule that you can't
come back to your table or leave while they're

dancing. (FADING) Let's hurry, they're wonderful.

SOUND:

MRS. B:
SOUND:

LENA:

MRS. B:

LENA:

MRS. B:

MUSIC:

208
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES AND TANGO MUSIC STARTS IN
BACKGROUND...
Ah--a whole half-hour of rest. Eh----
DOOR OPENS...MUSIC SWELLS...DOOR CLOSES...MUSIC
FADES
(FADING IN) Whew! IThought I'd rest while the
floor show's on. How are things?
Dull. Say, do ya wanta read one of my magazines?
I got a couple of old issues.
Sure.
This is a good one. It has true stories, taken
right from life, they say. You know, I get so
interested in these Stories that I can hardly
wait all evenin' 'til I get a chance to read 'em.
It's the only interesting thing that I see all
night.
UP AND UNDER
Stock Closing ----

209

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Brush's Night Club

Reasons for Adaptation

Katherine Brush is one of the better writers for slick
magazines. Night Club is a very good story of the type
based on a Grand Hotel format that has been so very pOpular
for the past fifteen years. Unlike many stories published
in this type of magazine it is, from.a literary standpoint,
worth bringing to the public again, witness its constant
inclusion in anthologies.
Adaptation Problems

Visualization was the main problem here. To make the
story coherent, the entrances and exits had to be made
clear to the listener. Thus, fades and sounds were very
important and dialogue had to be arranged to accomodate
sufficient time for the action. Also, the scene of the
action had to be clearly painted for the listener without
resorting to plain description. This is accomplished by Mrs.
Brady's talking to herself and by the sound effects.

Another problem was to build the atmosphere and the
character of.Nrs. Brady quickly in the first scene so that
the rest of the time could be devoted to the individual
stories. Another problem.was to make the dialogue of each
character completely descriptive of that person. This was
not easy because there was not a whole script in which to do

it, as there usually is. It is even more difficult to do

210
thumb-nail sketches in radio than to do thumb-nail sketches
in straight writing. In radio there is no Opportunity for
straight description, unless a narrator were used and that
would have been the weak way out in this script. Thus, the
dialogue had to be carefully fitted to each character.
Casting_and Actipg

All casting in this script should be for type and not
character because there is only time for tableaux. Also,
it is advisable to get a number of people who are very good
at doubling. They can be used in crowd scenes and as support-
ing players in several scenes.
.8222

The sound effects here are very simple but the pattern
is intricate. Much of the value of the script depends upon
the correct timing of the sound effects. For instance, in
the constant door opening and shutting there must be a
sufficient time lapse between the Opening and shutting for
a person to get in. T00, the rise in music must be perfectly
timed or the whole thing will sound very false. A sound man
with a good sense of dramatic timing should, however, find
the pattern extremely simple.
Script Changes

Here, again, there were no script changes in production.
All changes necessary were immediately obvious upon rereading
the first draft and to have waited to do it during rehearsal

would have been rather foolish. The changes made in rewriting

211
the first draft had to do with increasing the potential
visualization of the listener. For instance, in the first
draft, the street-noise background was neglected in the
first scene. Too, Mrs. Brady did not immediately speak
of the door and customers so that it was not until sometime
later that a listener could have realized that the scene
was in a night-club. Also, in the first draft, the scene
where Mr. Costello came in sight was very obscure. It was
not clear whether he walked past, or stood looking, or
exactly what he did. By adding the business of Mrs. Brady
calling to him and then talking to herself, the correct
perspective was obtained. Then, there were additional bits
of unimportant dialogue added to give more time between door
Openings and closings to augment the illusion of peOple
actually entering. The changes were all minor but they

aided the script a great deal.

MUSIC:
ARAM:

SOUND:

COP:

ARAM:

BOY:

ARAM:

BOY:

212
Part of.MY’Nnmm IS.A&M&
By William Saroyan
Adapted by'M. J. Martin

Stock Opening ---- William Saroyan's —---
Aram and Locomotive 58, Ojibway ---
THEME UP AND OUT
My name is Aram.Garoghlanian and many people have
thought I was crazy. In fact, they have thought
my whole poverty-stricken tribe was crazy. We
did, as I recall, live rather irregularly. I
recall that all of us loved adventure and sought
it, which I suppose isn't normal. Nearly every-
one likes adventure but won't do anything active
to attain it. I was different. For instance,
one day (FADE OUT) I saw a crowd standing in the
middle of the street.
CROWD NOISES FADE IN
Stand back, stand back. It's Just a donkey.
DOn't crowd. .
(FADE IN) What's the matter. Somebody killed?
What's going on?
Oh, nothing much--Just that crazy Indian's
donkey. Hit by a trolley.
You mean that Indian who Just came to town last
week?

Yeah, that's the one. He's nuts.

ARAM:
BOY:

ARAM:

SOUND :

CLERK:

CLERK:

ARAM:

CLERK:

SOUND:

LOCO:

LOCO:

213
Where's he now?
Just walked off and left him here. Went to the
drug store, I think.
That was my chance. I'd seen that Indian riding
around on his donkey and I'd wanted to talk to
him but just never had the chance. I went right
over.
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
Hello, Aram, what can I do for you?
Where's the Indian?
In the telephone booth telephoning Oklahoma..
Why?
How should I know. He does it often. Just part
Of being crazy I guess.
Did he escape from an asylum?
Sure acts like it.
Hmmm---well, I don't think he's crazy.
You wouldn't.
Well, I'll have a Royal Banana Special with crushed
walnuts.
Ok. Oh---oh, here he comes.
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
(FADING IN) Hello, Willie—--what are you eating?
Hello, my name's not Willie.
Oh, isn't it? What are you eating, anyway? It

looks good.

ABLAM 3

LOCO:

CLERK:

LOCO:
ARAIVI :

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCL:

ARAM:

LOCO:

LOCO:
ARAM:
LOCO:
ARMM:

LOCO:

214
This is what they call a Royal Banana Special.
I'll have one, too, and three packages of gum.
0k.
What's your name.
Locomotive, 38. I'm an Ojibway.
That's too bad about your animal.
There's no place for an animal in this world.
What kind of an automobile should I buy?
Are you going to buy an automobile?
I've been thinking about it for several minutes
now.
I didn't think you had money. I thought you
were poor.
That's the impression people get. Another
impression they get is that I am crazy.
I didn't get the impression that you were crazy
but I didn't get the impression that you were
rich either.
Well, I am.
I wish I was rich.
What for?
Well, I've been wanting to go fishing at Mendota
for three years in a row now. I need some equip-
ment and some kind of an automobile to get out
there in.

Can you drive an automobile?

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

MWu’I :

LOCO:

ARAM:
LOCO:
ARNVI :

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

215

I can drive anything.

Have you ever driven an automobile?

Not yet. So far I haven't had any automobile to
drive and it's against my family religion to steal
an automobile.

DO you mean to tell me that you believe you could
get into an automobile and start driving?

That's right.

Well, maybe you're right. Indians are born with
an instinct for riding, rowing, hunting, fishing
and swimming. Americans are born with an instinct
for fooling around with machines.

I'm no American. I'm an Armenian.

You were born in America weren't you?

Yes, but---

You're an Armenian born in.mmerica. You're four-
teen years Old and already you know you'll be
able to drive an automobile the minute you get
into one. You're a typical American, although
your complexion, like my own, is dark.

Driving a car is no trick. There's nothing to
it. It's easier than riding a donkey.

All right---just as you say. If I go up the
street and buy an automobile will you drive for
me?

Of course.

LOCO

ARMM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

,‘1 :

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

LOCO:

ARAM:

216
How much in wages would you want?
You mean you want to give me wages for driving
an automobile?
Of course.
Well, that's very nice of you but I don't want
any money for driving an automobile.
Some of the journeys may be long ones.
The longer the better.
Are you restless?
I was born in this little old town.
Don't you like it?
I like mountains and streams and mountain lakes.
Have you ever been in thelnountains?
Not yet but I'm going to reach them.some day.
I see. What kind of an automobile do you think
I ought to buy.
How about a Ford roadster?
Is that the best automobile?
DO you want the best?
Shouldn't I have the best?
I don't know. The best costs a lot of money.
What is the best?
Well, some people think the Cadillac is the best.
Others like the Packard. They're both pretty
good. I wouldn't knOW'which is best. The Packard

is beautiful to see going down the highway, but

LOCO:

E

LOCO:
ARAM :

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:
LOCO:

217
so is the Cadillac. I've watched a lot of those
fine cars going down the highway.

HOW'much is a Packard?

Around three thousand dollars---maybe a little
more.

Can we get one right away?

Listen, Mr. Locomotive, do you really want to
buy a Packard right away?

You know my animal passed away a few minutes
ago.

I saw it happen. They'll probably be arresting
you any minute now for leaving the animal in
the street.

They won't arrest me.

They will if there's a law against leaving a
dead donkey in the street.

No they won't -- not after I show them a few
papers I carry around with me all the time. 'The
peOple of this country have a lot of respect
for money and I've got a lot of money.

Where'd you get all this money?

I own some land in Oklahoma---about fifty
thousand acres.

Is it worth money?

No, all but about twenty acres of it is worthless.
I've got some oil wells on those twenty acres.

My brother and I.

ARAM:

LOCO:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:
LOCO:

ARAM:
MUSIC:
ARAM:

218
How did you Ojibways ever get down to Oklahoma?
I always thought the Ojibways lived up north,
up around the Great Lakes.
That's right. We used to live up around the
Great Lakes but my grandfather was a pioneer. He
moved west when everybody else did.
Oh---well, I guess they won't bother you about
the dead donkey at that.
They won't bother me about anything. It won't
be because of the money. It'll be because they
think I'm.crazy. Nobody in this town but you .
knows I've got money. It'll be all right. Do
you know where we can get one of those auto-
mobiles right-away?
The Packard agency is up on Broadway, two blocks
beyond the public library.
All right. If you're sure you won't mind driving
for me let's go get one of them. Something bright
in color-~red if they've got red. Where would
you like to drive to first?
Would you care to go fishing athendota?
I'll take the ride. I'll watch you fish. Where
can we get some equipment for you?
(FADE) Right around the corner at Homans.
UP AND OUT

We went around the corner to Homans and the Indian

LOCO:

ARAM:

COP:

LOCO:

LOCO:
JIM:
LOCO:
JIM:

219
bought twenty-seven dollars worth of fishing
equipment for me. Then we went up to the Packard
agency on Broadway. They didn't have a red
Packard but there was a beautiful green one. It
was light green, the color of new grass. This
was back there in 1922. The car was a (FADING
OUT) beautiful sports touring model.

(FADING IN) Do you think you could drive this
great big car?

I know I can drive it.

The police found us in the Packard agency and,
wanted to arrest the Indian for leaving the dead
donkey in the street. He showed them the papers
he had told.me about and the police apologized
and (FADING) went away.

We'll remove the animal, sir, and we're sorry
we troubled you about it.

It's no trouble at all.

Locomotive, 38 turned to the manager of the
Packard agency, Jim.Lewis, who used to run for
Mayor every time election time came around.

I'll take this car.

I'll draw up the papers immediately.

What papers? I'm going to pay for it now;

You mean you want to pay three thousand two

hundred seventeen dollars and sixty-five cents

LOCO:
J IM:

ARAM:

JIM:

ARAL'I :

220
cash?
Yes, it's ready to drive, isn't it?
Of course. I'll have the boys go over it with
a cloth to take Off any dust on it. I'll have
them check the motor too and fill the gasoline
tank. It won't take more than ten minutes. If
you'll step into the office I'll close the
transaction immediately.
Jim and the Indian stepped into Jim's office.
About three minutes later Jim came over to me,
a man shaken to the roots.
Aram, who is this guy? I thought he was a nut.
I had Johnny telephone the Pacific-Southwest
and they said his bank account is being trans-
ferred from.somewhere in Oklahoma. They said
his account is something over a million dollars.
I thought he was a-nut. Do you know him?
Well, I've seen him on that donkey that died
this morning but I never thought he had money.
He says you're going to drive for him. Are you
sure you're the man to drive a great big car
like this, son?
Wait a minute, now, Mr. Lewis, don't try to push
me out of this chance Of a lifetime. I can
drive this big Packard as well as anybody else

in town.

JIM:

ARAM:

JIM:

ARAM:
ARAM:

SOUND:

221
I'm.not trying to push you out of anything. I
just don't want you to drive out of here and
run over six or seven innocent peOple and maybe
smash the car. Get into the car and I'll give
you a few pointers. Do you know anything about
the gear shift?
I don't know anything about anything, yet, but
I'll soon find out.
All right. Just let me help you. Get into the
car with.me and we'll see what we can teach
you. From.now on, son, I want you to regard me
as a friend who will give you the shirt Off his
back. I want to thank you for bringing me this
fine Indian gentleman.
He told me he wanted the best car on the market.
You know I've always been crazy about driving
a Packard. Now hOW do I do it?
Well, let's see, we'll get to the driving. Good
heavens, your feet don't reach the pedals.
Never mind that, you just explain the gear shift.
Jim explained everything while the boys wiped
the dust off the car and went over the motor and
filled the gasoline tank. When the Indian came
out and got into the car, in back, where I in-
sisted he should sit, I had the motor going.
BRING SOUND OF MOTOR IN UNDER LAST SENTENCE

LOCO:

JIM:

SOUND:

ARAM:

JIM:

ARAM:

LOCO:

ARAM:

LOCO:

222
(FADING IN) He says he knows how to drive. By
instinct, he said. I believe him, too.
You needn't worry about Aram.here, he can drive
all right. Clear the way there, boys, let him
have all the room necessary.
BRING SOUND OF CAR STARTING AND DRIVING OFF UP
UNDER THE FOLLOWING
I turned the big car around slowly, shifted, and
shot out of the agency at about fifty miles an
hour, with Jim.Lewis running after the car
and shouting.. .
Take it easy, son. Don't Open up until you get
out on the highway. The Speed limit in town
is twenty-five miles an hour.
The Indian wasn't at all excited even though I
was throwing him around a good deal. I wasn't
doing it on purpose, though. It was simply that
I wasn't very familiar with the manner in which'
the automobile worked.
You're an excellent driver, Willie. It's like
I said. YOu're an American and you were born
with an instinct for mechanical contraptions
like this.
We'll be in Mendota in an hour. You'll see some
great fishing out there.

How far is Mendota?

LOCO:

MUS IC :
ARNM:

223
About ninety miles.
Ninety miles is too far to go in an hour. Take
two hours. We're passing a lot of interesting
scenery I'd like to look at a little more close-
ly.
All right, but I sure am anxious to get out there
and fish.
Well, all right then, go as fast as you like
this time but some time I'll expect you to drive
a little more slowly so I can see some of the
scenery. I'm missing everything. I don't even
get a chance to read the signs.
I'll travel slowly now if you want me to.
NO, let her go. Let her go as fast as she'll
go.
UP VERY FAST AND OUT
Well, we got out to Mendota in an hour and seven-
teen minutes. I would have made better time
except for the long stretch of dirt road. I
drove the car right up to the river bank. The
Indian asked if I knew how to get the tOp down
so he could sit in the open and watch me fish.
I didn't know hOW'tO get the top down, but I
got it down. It took me twenty minutes to do
it. I fished for about three hours, fell into

the river twice and finally landed a small one.

LOCO:
ARAM:
LOCO:

i:
LOCO:
ARAM:

LOCO:

ARI-1M 2

L000:

1M -. ‘v’l :

A 3 AW 1 :

224
You don't know the first thing about fishing.
What am I doing wrong?
Everything. Have you ever fished before?
No.
I didn't think so.
What am I doing wrong?
Well, nothing in particular, only you're fishing
at about the same rate of speed that you drive
an automobile.
Is that wrong?
It's not exactly wrong, except that it'll keep
you from.getting anything to speak of and you'll
go on falling into the river.
I'm not falling, they're pulling me in. They've
got an awful pull. This grass is mighty slippery
too. There ain't nothing around here to grab
hold of.
I reeled in one more little one and then I asked
if he'd like to go home. He said he would if I
wanted to, too, so I put away the fishing equip-
ment and the two fish and got in the car and
started driving back to town. I drove that big
Packard for this Ojibway Indian, Locomotive 38,
as long as he stayed in town, which was all
summer. He stayed at the hotel all the time.

I tried to get him to learn to drive but he said

LOCO:

ARAB‘ i:

LOCO:

CLERK

225
it was out of the question. I drove that
Packard all over the San Joaquin Valley that
summer, with the Indian in the back chewing
eight or nine sticks of gum. He told me to
drive anywhere I cared to go, so it was either
to some place where I could fish or some place
where I could hunt.

Willie, you don't know the first thing about
fishing or hunting but I'm glad to see you
trying.

Yes, he liked to see me try. As long as I
knew him he never laughed except once. That‘
was the time I shot at a jack-rabbit with a
twelve-guage shotgun that had a terrible kick
and drilled a crow. He tried to tell me all
the time that that was my average.

(LAUGHING) That's your average, Willie, to
shoot at a jack-rabbit and kill a crow; You're
an American. Look at the way you took to this
big automobile.

One day in November that year his brother came
to town from Oklahoma and the next day when I
went down to the hotel to get him, they told
me he'd gone back to Oklahoma with his brother.
Where's the Packard? .

They took the Packard.

ARMM:

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226
Who drove?
The Indian.
They're both Indians. Which of the brothers
drove the car?
The one who lived at this hotel.
Are you sure.
Well, I only saw him get into the car out front
and drive away, that's all.
Do you mean to tell me he knew how to shift
gears?
He looked as if he did. He looked like an
expert driver to me.
Thanks.
On the way home I figured he'd just wanted me
to believe he couldn't drive, so I could drive
all the time and feel good. He was just a
young man who'd come to town on a donkey, bored
to death or something, who'd taken advantage
of a chance to be entertained by a small town
kid who was bored to death, too. That's the
only way I could figure it out without accepting
the general theory that he was crazy.
UP AND OUT
Stock Closing ---

227

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Saroyan's Aram and Locomotive 33,_Ojibway -
part onMy Name Is Aram

 

Reasons for Adaptation

 

Saroyan is thought by many to be one of our most unique
moderns. He is well known, but few of his things have been
adapted for radio. However, he is a good example of the
trend toward a kind of simplified humor that characterizes
much of our present-day writing. Because so few of his things
have been adapted and because he is so widely read and talked
of, it seemed desirable to include one of his stories in
this series.) The selection chosen was more readily adapted
than most Of the stories in his various collections, yet it
is fairly typical of him. Hence, the choice of Aram and
Locomotive 38, Ojibway.

Adaptation Problems

 

Needless to say if anyone is at all familiar with
Saroyan's works, the biggest adaptation problem was to find
a story to adapt. Once that was accomplished, however, the
rest was simple. To make the adaptation of any value as an
example of Saroyan it was necessary to keep much of the
original wording of the conversation. This is not always
true of the stories of other authors where the plot develop-
ment and characterization play a dominant part. In Saroyan,

however, it is true. Saroyan expresses simple actions and

thoughts in a simple and amusing way. It is the fact that

228
everything is so simply done that makes the story amusing.
If the wording were lost, so would the charm be.

The use of the narrator was an eXpediency. Without
the narrator, the script would have been too long and too
burdened with hhort dramatized scenes. Besides, the first-
person narrator, Aram, also aids in preserving the original
spirit Of the story.
Casting_and Acting

There is little difficult about the script in the
matter of casting or acting. In casting, get a very young
boy who has a simple delivery and who can convey a sort of
shrewd wisdom beyond his years. Much of the humor of the
script comes through picturing this rather unsmiling, Oldish
boy performing odd antics with a.Packard and a fishing pole.
He must, in the acting, take himself completely seriously.
There is nothing outlandish to Aram.in the simple statement
that he can drive a car by instinct and without reaching
the pedals. He's not just putting one over on the Indian.
He sees nothing strange about it and he must be played that
way to be a Saroyan character. The Indian must be played
as an intelligent and whimsical person but don't make him
at all superior or paternal. He, too, accepts the unexpect-
ed, as if he had expected it all the time. His conversation
with Aram.must be completely sincere, no tongue-in-cheek
attitude, and the two must treat one another as equals,

since both feel that way in the actual story.

229

Sound

 

There are no sound effects that are unusual or
difficult. A normal degree of awareness is all that is
required of a sound man in this script.

Script Changes

Because Of the previously eXplained necessity for main-
taining Saroyan's style, there were no changes made during
production. Those made in rewriting the first draft were
minor rewordings for the sake of easier and more natural
speeches. The timing was on the nose, so there was no need

for padding or deletion.

ANN:

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230
UNCLE FRED FLITS BY
By P. G. Wodehouse
Adapted by M. J. Martin

Stock Opening --- P. G. Wodehouse's --- gpglg
Fred Flits By ----
THEME UP AND OUT
To begin our story, we look in first on one of
the better London Clubs where we find a group
of gentlemen in one of the club smoking rooms
having an after-dinner cigar. (FADE) They are
discussing a gentleman who has just come in.
I say, Hilary, did you see Pongo pass the door
just then?
(LAUGHING) Yes, poor chap. Looks terrible
doesn't he?
Been ill?
Good lord, no. Haven't you heard? He's all
broken up about his Uncle Fred.
Dead?
No such luck. Coming up to London again tomorrow.
Pongo had a wire this morning.
And that upsets him?
Naturally, after what happened last time.
What was that?
Ah!
What happened last time?

You may well ask.

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231
I do ask.
Ah--poor old Pongo. You see his Uncle Fred, the
Earl of Ickenham, Hants, lives in the country
most of the year, but from time to time he has
a nasty habit of slipping his collar and getting
loose and descending upon Pongo.
Well, what's wrong with that?
Well, you see, every time he does so, the unhappy
young blighter is subjected to some soul-testing
eXperience.
I begin to see.
Yes, the trouble with this uncle is that, thOugh
sixty if a day, he becomes, on arriving in the
metrOpolis as young as he feels-~which is,
apparently, a youngish twenty-two. He will insist
on lugging Pongo out in the Open and there right
in the public eye, step high, wide and plentiful.
‘Well, why doesn't Pongo avoid him?
Ah---Pongo isn't in a position to use the iron
hand with the old buster because occasionally he
has to get into his aged relative's ribs and shake
him.down for a much-needed tenner, or what-not.
Ah--clear, clear, quite clear. But---what about
this "last time"?
Well, on the occasion to which I refer, he stood

pink and genial on Pongo's hearth-rug, bulging

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232
with Pongo's lunch and wreathed in the smoke of
one of Pongo's cigars (FADE) and said without a
hint of embarrassment---

(FADING IN) And, now, my boy, for a pleasant and
instructive afternoon.

A what?

A pleasant and instructive afternoon. I prOpose
that you place yourself in my hands and leave
the program entirely up to me.

Oh, no, you aren't going to get me to the dog-
races again.

No, no. Of course not. Nothing of the kind at
all. What I prOpose to do this afternoon is to
take you to visit the home of your ancestors.

I thought Ickenham was the home of my ancestors.
It is one of the homes of your ancestors. They
also resided rather nearer the heart of things,
at a place called Mitching Hill.

Down in the suburbs do you mean?

The neighborhood is now suburban, true. It is
many years since the meadows where I sported as
a child were sold and cut up into building lots.
But when I was a boy, Mitching Hill was open
country. It was a vast, rolling estate belong-
ing to your great-uncle, Narmaduke, a man with

whiskers of a nature which you, with your pure

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233
mind would scarcely credit, and I have long
felt a sentimental urge to see what the devil
the old place looks like now. Perfectly foul,
I eXpect. Still---I think we should make a
pious pilgrimage.

Oh, absolutely. Fine. Splendid. Topping.

Not much can happen there. Ah---fine.

Then put on your hat and rompers and let us be
Off. I fancy one gets there by omnibuses and
things. (FADE) Hurry now, my boy, we must---
FAST AND LIGHT --- UP AND OUT

BUS MOTOR FADING OUT

Ah--—here we are.

Yes. Well, not much mental uplift here. All
these rows and rows of semi-detached villas.
Rather monotonous. But harmless---absolutely
harmless.

Ah---right here is a spot I well remember. I
plugged the gardner in the seat with my trusty
bow and arrow. (LAUGHING) Never liked him.any-
way----the old grouch.

Looks like rain, eh? Just like this season of
the year. The day starts out spring and all of
a sudden switches to mid-winter. And me with
no overcoat and no umbrella.

Aha: It must have been just here that I was

PONGO:

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234
sick after my first cigar.
Uncle, did you say that you had to be back at
the Hall by tomorrow noon? ‘
Yep---Pongo---your dear Aunt Jane threatened to
scalp me with a blunt knife if I weren't.
Well, looks like I'm.getting off without your
perpetrating a single major outrage on the public
welfare.
What's that, my boy?
Nothing, Uncle.
Ah, look at that villa there.
Which one? They're all exactly alike.
The one called the Cedars.
RAIN SNEAKS IN UNDER FADING UP
Oh, yes. Wonder why they call it that? I don't
see any cedars about.
On this very spot, fifty years ago come Lamma's
Eve I ---oh blast it--- it's raining.
Let loose all of a sudden.
(FADING OUT) Come on---up on the porch here.
Buzzing down like a shower bath, eh?
(FADING IN) Not much of a shelter here--blows
in on us. I say, look at that parrot in the
window there.
Yes, funny looking thing. Doesn't like our stand-
ing here from the look Of him.

FRED:

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MAID 2

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235
Don't lean on the door, my boy, or you'll fall
in. I just rang the bell and someone's bound
to Open it---
DOOR OPENS....SCUFFLING, STUMBLING AND
EXCIAMATIONS ENSUE
See---I told you: Good afternoon, madam.
Good afternoon.
The Cedars?
Yes, this is the Cedars.
Are the old folks at home?
There's nobody at home.
Ah, well, never mind. I've come to clip the
parrot's claws. My assistant, Mr. Wilkinshaw,
who applies the anaesthetic.
Are you from the bird store?
A very happy guess.
Nobody told me you were coming.
They keep things from you, do they? Tsk--tsk--
too bad. Come along in, Pongo, don't stand out
there by yourself.
(FADING IN) Uh---oh---well---yes.
DOOR CLOSES
Well, I suppose it's all right. I was just going
out. It's my afternoon.
Go out. By all means---go out. We'll leave

everything in order.

MAID:
FRED:

MAID 3

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236
Well, if you're sure-—- E
Certainly, certainly. Now let's see, Mr.
Wilkinshaw, what do you think of the parrot?
(FADING) Well, I'll be leaving then.
Good—bye, good-bye. Now the parrot looks-~-
DOOR CLOSING
Ah~--she's gone. Now let's just light this
little gas fire and be cozy.
But we can't---
So here we are---a little tact, a little address
and here we are, snug and cozy and not catching
our deaths Of cold. You'll never go far wrong
if you leave things to me. Pull up a chair.
But, dash it, we can't stop here.
Not stOp here? Are you suggesting that we go
out into that rain?
Well---—
My dear lad, you are not aware of the issues
involved. This morning as I was leaving home, I
had a rather painful disagreement with your aunt.
She said the weather was treacherous and wished
me to take my wooley muffler. I replied that
the weather was not treacherous and I'd be dashed
if I took my wooley muffler. Eventually by the
exercise of an iron-will, I had my way, and I

ask you, my dear boy, to envisage what will

PONG:

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237
happen if I return with a cold in my head. I
shall sink to the level of a fifth-class power.
No! I shall remain here toasting my toes at
this really excellent little fire. I had no
idea that a gas fire radiated such warmth. I
feel all in a glow. You're prespiring yourself,
Pongo, warm, eh?
Look, Uncle, I'm reading for the Bar and while
I'd be the first to admit that I haven't a
complete toe-hold on the Law of Great Britain,
oiling into a perfect stranger's semi-detached
villa on the pretext of pruning the parrot is a
misdemeanor or something. Besides, it would be
blamed embarassing if the blighter who owns
this ghastly house should return. Talking of
envisaging things, try that one over on your
pianola.

DOOR BELL RINGS

There:

Don't say, "there", my boy. It's the sort of
thing your aunt says. I see no reason for alarm.
Obviously, this is some casual caller. The owner
would have his own latch-key. Glance cautiously
out of the window and see if you can see anybody.
Well, naturally, I'll see somebody, somebody rang,

didn't they. Hmmmm--ah---yes--it's a pink chap.

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238
How pink?
Pretty pink!
Well, there you are then. I told you so. The
sort of fellOWS'WhO own houses like this are
always pale and sallow from.working in offices
all day. Go and see what he wants.
You go and see what he wants.
We'll both go and see what he wants.
DOOR OPENS
Pardon me, is Mr. Roddie in?
No.
Yes! Don't be silly, Douglas, of course I'm
in. I am Mr. Roddie. This, such as he is, is
my son, Douglas. And you?
Name of Robinson.
What about the name of Ronbinson?
It's mine.
Oh, why didn't you say so in the first place.
Delighted to see you. Mr. Robinson, now that
we've got it straight, come right in and take
your boots off.
Uh---thank you--uhe---is Julia here?
Douglas, is she?
No.
No.

She wired me she was coming here today.

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239
Ah, then we'll have a fourth for bridge.
I don't suppose you've ever met Julia. Bit of
trouble in the family, she said.
It's often the way.
The Julia I mean is your niece, Julia Parker.
Or rather your wife's niece, Julia Parker.
Any niece of my wife is a niece of mine. We
share and share alike.
Julia and I want to get married.
Well, go ahead.
But they won't let us-~~her mother and father,
I mean and Uncle Charlie and Uncle Henry Parker
and the rest of them. They---they don't think
I'm good enough.
The morality of the modern young man is
notoriously lax.
Oh, I don't mean morally not good. I mean class.
They're a haughty lot.
What makes them haughty? Are they earls?
No, they aren't earls.
Then why the devil are they haughty? Only earls
have a right to be haughty. Earls are hot-stuff.
When you get an earl, you've got something.
Besides, we've had words. Me and her father.
One thing led to another and in the end I called

him a perishing old----

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240
DOOR BELL RILGS
That must be Julia. (FADIEG) I'll see (OFF
MIKE) No, that's her whole family--—mother and
father. (FADIRG BACK IN) I didn't know they
were coming.
You don't wish to meet them?
No, I don't.
Then duck behind the settee, Mr. Robinson.
There---now I'll let them in.
You aren't going to let those bounders in, are
you?
Certainly, we Roddies keep Open-house. And as.
they are presumably aware that Mr. Roddie has
no son, I think we'd better return to the old
lay-out. You are the local vet, my boy, come
to minister to my parrot.
No.
When I return, I should like to find you by the
cage, staring at the parrot in a very scientific
manner. Tap your teeth from time to time with
a pencil and try to smell of ether. It will help
to add conviction. (FADING OUT) Now I shan't
be but a moment.
I'll have to say one thing. That girl's a pippin.
Face like a rose-bud. Hmmm---wonder how she ever
got mixed up with that pink chap. Well, hello,

Polly, you dirty old---oh, oh here they come.

CONN:

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19:11le 3

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241
(FADING IN) Well, you don't know who I am,
I'll be bound. I'm Laura's sister, Connie.
This is Claude, my husband. And this is Julia,
my daughter. Is Laura in?
I regret to say, no.
I thought you were younger.
Younger than what?
Younger than you are.
You can't be younger than you are, worse luck.
Still, one does one's best and I'm bound to
say that of recent years, I have made a pretty
good go of it. I
Who's that?
Where---oh---there--—oh, that's the local vet,
clustering around my parrot.
I can't talk in front of him.
It's quite all right. The poor fellow is stone-
deaf.
Well, he should look at the parrot then, instead
of at Julia.
Yes, I'll just signal him. There---—now then?
Although Laura never did me the honor to invite
me to her wedding, for which reason I have not
communicated with her in five years, necessity

compels me to cross her threshold today. I want

you and Laura to take Julia into your home for

JUL:

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242
a week or so, until I can make other arrange-
ments for her. Julia is studying the piano and
she sits for her examination in two week's time,
so until then she must remain in London. The
trouble is, she has fallen in love---or thinks
she has.
I know I have.
Yesterday Claude and I arrived in London to
give Julia a surprise. We stayed, naturally, in
the boarding house where she has been living
for the past six weeks. And what do you think
we discovered?
Insects?
Not insects. A letter from.a young man we don't
even know, who's planning to marry our daughter.
I sent for him immediately and found him to be
quite impossible. He jellies eels.
Does what?
He is an assistant at a jellied eel shop.
But surely, that speaks well for him. It isn't
everyone who can jelly an eel, by any means. I
know if someone came to me and said, "Jelly this
eel," I should be non-plussed and so would
Winston Churchill and Ramsay McDonald, I'll bet.
Oh, for heavens sake, what do you suppose

Charlie Parker would say if I allowed his niece

CLAU:

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243
to marry a.man who Jellies eels. Dr Henry
Parker?
0r Cousin.Alf Robbins, for that matter?
That's right, Claude. Cousin Alfred would die
of shame.

I've told you a hundred times, mother, that
Wilberforce is only jellying eels 'til he finds
something better.

What is better than an eel---for jellying
purposes, I mean?

He is ambitious. It won't be long before
Wilberforce suddenly rises in the world.

No, it won't---in fact he's rising right now--
from.behind that divan.

(FADING IN) Julia-~-

Wilby!

Julia---st0p---that. --- I'm ashamed of you.
80 mm I.

I blush for you.

Me too.

Hugging and kissing a man who called your father

'a perishing old bottle-nosed Gawd-help-us.

I think that before proceeding we ought to go
into that point. Maybe he's right. Frankly,
in my'opinion----

Wilby will apologize.

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244
Of course---
That doesn't matter. You must understand---
Yes, I know. Uncle Charlie Parker and Uncle
Henry Parker and Cousin Alf Robbins and all that,
that---pack of snobs. Think they're somebody
just 'cause they have money. I'd like to know
how they got it. a
If you're insinuating---
Well, of course he's right, Connie, you can't
get away from that.
What?
Have you forgotten how Charlie made his pile.
You must admit that lending money at 25% interest
isn't done in the best circles--or so the judge
said at the trial.
I never knew that.
And when Henry Parker had all that fuss with the
bank it was touch and go they didn't send him to
prison--stealing money from the till to bet on
the races---that's bad. And as for Cousin Alf----
There's not a word of truth in it.
Well, have it your way. But I think myself we're
lucky to marry even into eel-jellying circles.
So dd I.
You don't believe what this man is saying?

I believe every word.

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245
So do I.
Well, I never liked Laura---but I never wished
her a husband like you.
Husband? What gives you the impression Laura
and I are married?
You'll have to let me marry Wilberforce now---
he knows too much about us. That is, if he
doesn't mind marrying into our family.
Of course not, darling. Let's go into the
garden. (FADING) My dear, we'll soon be
married and---
Well, there they go---hand in hand. And are
you joining the hikers?
No---I shall remain and have a cup of tea. You
won't grudge us a cup of tea, I hOpe?
No, not at all---just make yourselves at home.
But I must go out for an errand -- just stay
here and perhaps Laura will be back. (FADING)
I'll just take the vet here with me -----
DOOR CLOSING
Well, that's that. Now let's be off. Pleasant
after the rain, isn't it? Come along, my boy.
So that is that. On these visits of mine to the
metrOpolis, Pongo, I always make it my aim, if
possible, to spread sweetness and light. I look
about me, even in a foul hole like hitching Hill

MUS IC 3
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246
and I ask myself-~How can I leave this foul
hole a better and happier foul hole than I
found it? And if I see a chance, I grab it.
Now let's sketch our rough plans for the even-
ing as we go home. If the King's Crown Pub is
still Open I think we might drop in. I haven't
been thrown out of there for thirty years. Yes,
I think that's the thing to do. (FADE) Come
along, Pongo.

UP FAST AND OUT

And thgt_is Pongo's Uncle Fred!

And that is why Pongo looks like the central
figure in a Greek tragedy!

And thgt is our story for this afternoon.

UP AND OUT

Stock Closing ---

247

Notes on the Adaptation and Production of
Wodehouse's Uncle Fred Flits By

 

Reasons for Adaptation

It seemed desirable in the modern section of this
thesis to include another example of a type of humor which
has exerted a great deal of influence on modern stories.
Wodehouse has in his story, Uncle Fred Flits By, portrayed
a type of humorous character of which most readers are
fond. This story is one of Wodehouse's best, and most
representative and most amusing.
Adaptation Problems

The greatest problem here was to select the parts of
the conversation and plot which were the most amusing and
necessary. 'The original had such a wealth of material
that is entertaining that any omission was made very
reluctantly. Hence, the choice of what to keep and what
to omit required consideration and care. Outside of that,
there were few problems because there was so much with
which to work. Another problem came in the decisions con-
cerning pointing the wit down so that it could be more
readily understandable. However, the author's wording in
such cases usually held, as it should in a good adaptation
of such a piece.
Castingpand Acting

All of the roles are self-eXplanatory and should
present no problem. One word of caution is, don't allow

Pongo to be played as an overly precise, stuffy young man.

‘ 248

The listener must sympathize with him, at the same time that
he loves Uncle Fred. Otherwise, much of the point of the
humor will be lost. Pongo must be a normal person, in order
that the listener will be able to feel, in Pongo's reactions,
his own possible reactions. Again, don't play Uncle Fred
too broadly. The value of his humor is that he says and
does everything with a cheerful but noncommittal smile. He
doesn't laugh at his own jokes.
919mg

Completely standard.
Script Changes

The changes in this script were very few. In rehearsal,
I added the rain sound effect, which I had not originally
included, and several fades to increase the listener's
visualization. Outside of’that, the only changes were
deletions of a few lines for the purpose of shortening the

script. However, the script plays so rapidly that not many.

deletions were needed.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

Abbot, Waldo Handbook of Broadcasting McGraweHill '41

Corwin, Norman Thirteen'by Corwin Henry Holt & Co. '39

McCallum, J. D. The 1936 College Omnibus Harcourt, Brace
& Co. '36

NeGill, Earle Radio Directing, McGraWAHill '39

McGraw, W. J. Wayne University BroadcastinggGuild Radio
Writing Handbook Wayne University '40-'41

Seymour, hatherine and martin, J. T. W. Practical Radio

 

Writing Longmans, Green & Co. '38

Thrall, W. F. and Hibbard, Addison A Handbook to Literature
Odyssey '36

Wylie, Max Best Broadcasts of 1938-39 McCraquill '39

Wylie, max Radio Writing Farrar & Rinehart '39

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