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THE MUSIC THERAPIST AS MENTOR: TWO PORTRAITS OF POSITIVE
MENTORING RELATIONSHIPS

By

Theresa Ray Merrill

A DISSERTATION
Submitted to
Michigan State University

in partial fulfillment of the requirements
for the degree of

DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY
Music Education

2009

ABSTRACT

THE MUSIC THERAPIST AS MENTOR: TWO PORTRAITS OF POSITIVE
MENTORING RELATIONSHIPS

By

Theresa Ray Merrill

This research presents two portraits of positive mentoring relationships
between professional music therapists. The author describes characteristics and
qualities of these relationships through two axes that she defines as the Axis of
Experience and the Axis of Qualities.

Using the qualitative and aesthetic methodology of Portraiture (Lawrence-
Lightfoot & Hoffman-Davis, 1997) the presentation of essential themes is performed
through the eye of the researcher (Portraitist) who, as collaborator with the research
participants, weaves together metaphor and image in a narrative and dialogical
portrait of words.

A thorough review of the literature on mentoring is explored through the
issues and themes represented within it. Through this, a precedent and rationale is
made for the ‘thick description’ that is inherent in the Portraiture process. A clear
distinction is made between mentoring and supervision within the music therapy
context, and ethics, education and feminist perspectives are given voice.

Findings of this research along the Axis of experience (the relational
experience and its unfolding and development over time between members of the
relation) include The Search for Resonance, Responding to the Call: Resonating,

and Developmental Phases. Findings from along the Axis of Qualities (experiences

of being and developing in mentoring relationships) include The Ideal Professional
Parent, and Close-Enough Space (with sub-theme metaphors of Sword Made of
Clouds, and Like Chopping Wood).

This research addresses a gap in the music therapy literature and has the
potential to influence education and professional practice. Additionally, this work
offers new, music-centered language to the literature on Portraiture as an arts-based

research method.

 

DEDICATION

This work and the effort it represents are lovingly dedicated to the memory of my

mother, who believed in the power of education to transform and liberate.

iv

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

Mentor

I care what you think of me
teacher, mentor, not yet friend.
Not at all in the way I cared
about the subterranean pull of Mother’s conditional love,
but more in the way I cared
about the fortune teller’s view of my tea cup
and the offer from the talent scout.

You are all about who I can be
less about who I am.
You see a vision of my greatness
in the first few strokes of my brush
in the way my voice slides between notes
and catches in your belly,
in the turn of a casual phrase,
in the clarity of an idea.

You believe in me fiercely, stubbornly
and I rise higher than I would have imagined
not because you tell me so with vacant praise
but because you hold me to a standard
that I hold only in hopeful shadow
not daring to own for myself.

You persist as l succumb to fear of failure
You persist.

I am drawn off my path by the pull of life,

by the nearness of death

and you are there
reminding me that it is not over.
There are words to write,
colours to paint,
songs to sing.

Guardian at the gate of my potential,
teacher, mentor, not yet friend
I care what you think of me
but not in the way I care _
what the neighbors think of my uncut grass.
You know the smell of smoke on a Santa Ana better than most
and sing of life after annihilation
you know my crucible as your own

and defend my transforrnative rights.

I care that you know me
and persist in your beliefjust the same
even as you weary of my tired whine,
confusion and self-pity.

You persist as I wind myself in knots
nearly strangling the life out of anything good.
You persist with no reward in sight
save my feeble and inadequate gratitude
and some small measure of satisfaction
when at last, I create some shiny thing.

Teacher, mentor, not yet friend
I will forever care about your work
your wellbeing,
your vision,
your genius.

I am ferociously yours.
One of your people.

You may not care
in the way that I care
what you think.

But I think,
and think more
because of you.

For Carolyn

v1

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

When one lives with a project for a long time, as I have, it becomes clear
that it indeed, takes a community to accomplish a project. I must acknowledge
my research participants who opened their hearts and lives up to the scmtiny of
my pen— a courageous and generous act. I would also like to acknowledge my
colleagues in the Music Department at Marylhurst University, Dr. John Paul and
Christine Korb who supported me emotionally and materially enabling me to
focus extra time toward the completion of this project.

I wrote the vast majority of this at our beautiful family cabin along the
McKenzie River in the Cascade Mountain Range in Oregon. I am extremely
grateful to my brother Ray Merrill, who enabled my frequent use of this clear and
quiet space over the course of the two years it took to creatively compose this
work. I learned much about my creative process and am convinced that I would
have never been able to compose this document anyplace else.

I should like to thank those members of my committee who took the time
to provide feedback: Cynthia Taggart, Judy Palac, John Kratus and Ted Tims. I
would especially like to acknowledge and thank Dr. David Rayl for his particular
support in the final year of work.

My husband, Siri Nam Simran Singh Khalsa endured and supported me
through long separations, emotional traumas, health crises and financial

hardships in the course of the past eight years of my doctoral studies.

vii

Finally, I am unable to adequately express in words the significance of
Carolyn Kenny’s contribution to this work and to me personally. She was the first
to acknowledge me as a writer over fifteen years ago and her belief in me as an
artist and as a thinker has sustained me through the most difficult of times. I can
truthfully say that it were not for Carolyn, this would not have been completed. In
2005, I experienced a life-threatening health crisis. All through my healing, she
was relentless in her sustained vision of a completed dissertation, believing for
me when I had stopped believing in myself and in my strength to accomplish this
goal. It is an indicator of her great heart, her great generosity and her fierce

belief in the human spirit.

viii

TABLE OF CONTENTS

LIST OF TABLES ...x..ii
LIST OF FIGURES............... XIII

Part 1 THE FRAMEWORK

CHAPTER1 lntroduction................ .. .. .......2

CHAPTER 2 The Story of the question... ......8

CHAPTER 3 Mentoring as Human Occupation- A Review of Relevant Literature
Origins... 14
Issues and Themes
Definition orDescription?” 17
DevelopmentalProcesses“ 19
Researching Mentoring Relationships ................................... 22
Ethics and TraInIng In Mentoring... 28
Mentoring and Women-AFeministview................................30
Mentoring in MusicTherapy................................................36

Part 2 MEDIA

CHAPTER 4 Methodology
Portraiture” ...44

Processes. .. 48
Selecting the PartICIpants .....50
The Interviews... ............53
The Reflexive Journal............ ...........56
Essential Qualities... .. .......57
Epistemology... ...59

Segue: From Epistemology to Methodology....64
Part 3 EXHIBITION: PERFORMANCE OF FINDINGS

Preface to the Performance of Findings...... .....69

CHAPTER 5 Framing the Terrain ‘
Norwegian Wood... ....70

Sanctuary 72

1x

Priming the Canvas ...76
CHAPTER 6 Consonances
Resonance... .. .... .78
Prologue to a Relation .... ..80
Recognizing Resonance ...80
Tomas... ...80
Canon... 82
A Musicality of Being- Resonance... ...85
Jan... .....90
Lisa... .. ....93
Culture and Gender ...95
CHPATER 7 The Working Relationship
The Ideal Professional Parent... ....102
Canon and Lisa... ...102
Tomas and Jan... ......107
Regulating the RelationshIp ...114
CHAPTER 8 Ways of Being
Mentor Qualities... .. .1 16
“Sword made ofClouds’i. .. 116
Active Support- “Chopping Wood”... 1 18
The Illusion of hierarchy... ... 124
Jan.. .... ..128
Resonances RecapItulated .. 1 30
Protégé Qualities... . . .. ...132
Protégé Characteristics RecapItuIated .......... 140
CHAPTER 9 Divergences
Dissonance” .. .143
Same Story, New PerspectIve .. .144
Negative Space... .. ..148
Negative Space RecapItulatIon 153
CHAPTER 10 Reverberation and Interpretive Discussion... ....154
The Axis of Experience:
The Search for Resonance... ......155‘
Discursive Point 1.. ......1 55
Responding to the call ResonatIng ...157
Discursive Point 2... .. . ......158
Developmental Phases .of the RelatIonshIp ...... 163
Discursive Point3.. 164
The Axis of Qualitiesz. ...166
The Ideal Professional Parent... .. .....167
Close-Enough Space... ......168

Discursive Point 5........
Discursive Point 6...

CHAPTER 11 Contemplation: Implications, Limitations and
Possibilities......

Limitations...
Recommendations...

xi

...169
...170

...172
...176
...179

...192

Table 1.
Table 2.
Table 3.
Table 4.

List of Tables

Aggregation of Protégé Qualities by Participant...
lntellectually Adept...
Open-ness...............

Gender Specific Protege Characteristics...

xii

.140
..140

141

.141

List of Figures

Fi g n....Ire 1. Model of Processes of the Mentoring Relationship ................... 113
Fig -._Jl'e 2. Diagram of Emergent Themes I159
Fig ....Ire 3. Diagram of Emergent Themes ll161

xiii

If just one person believes in you,

Deep enough, and strong enough, believes in you...
Hard enough, and long enough...
It stands to reason that you yourself will
Start to see what everybody sees in
You...
And maybe even you,
Can believe in you... too!
-Elmo (Sesame Street)-

Part 1
THE FRAMEWORK
CHAPTER 1
Introduction
Artist, midwife, parent, coach, safety net, compass, sculptor, teacher,
trainer, counselor, wise guide role model, supporter, promoter, trusted colleague,
supervisor, champion, are all examples of metaphors that have been used to
describe the role and function of a Mentor. Mentoring has also been described
as a developmental relationship that exists between individuals that is focused on
a senior and more experienced individual assisting a junior or less experienced
individual across professional, occupational, educational and psychosocial
domains (Kram, 1985).

l was motivated to my research questions by the experience of feeling
m)fself to be ineffective as a supervisor of traditional-aged college music therapy
students, and recognizing the difference between the ‘mentoring preceptor’ role I
was accustomed to, and the supervisor’s role I was called to as a graduate
teaching assistant. Simultaneously, I was also experiencing an absence of

mentoring as a doctoral student and educator in the making. I am sure that my
senior professors must have tried to mentor me to the best of their ability, but a
general difference in worldview and the differences I experienced between the
Canadian music therapy and interpersonal contexts I had functioned within for so
many years, and their American counterparts, left me feeling estranged. I
p e"‘-"eived the lack of an advocate and mentor and that perception led me to

2

connect my desire to be an effective clinical educator with my desire for a
Mentor. What makes for a ‘good’ mentoring relationship? How can I be a good
Mentor to others? Thus, this study was conceived.

This dissertation presents two portraits of positive mentoring relationships
through the words of “Canon and Lisa” and “Tomas and Jan”- each pair having a
long-standing relationship in which the senior partner has served as a Mentor to
the junior partner or Protégé (this study uses the terminology Mentor and Protégé
to describe these roles). The presentation of essential themes is performed
through the eye of the researcher (Portraitist) who, as collaborator with the
research participants, weaves together metaphor and image in a narrative and
dialogical portrait of words.

Part 1 is titled The Framework and refers to that which surrounds, frames
and contextualizes the Portraits. It includes the introduction to the work, the story
of the question and the review of relevant literature. The Portraitist (researcher)
is introduced in chapter two- The Story of the Question. The reader is introduced
to her voice, her position and motivation. She exposes her vulnerability and
desire for excellence as an educator, and clinical supervisor. Motivation (which
is transformed through the portraits to a more elevated and conscious state:
Intention) is a running current that—like a canvas weave beneath a
painting—subtly grounds this work and creates relevance. Intention can be
experienced as the thing to which the portraits adhere and to which layers can be

added to portray depth and contrast.

In chapter three, a thorough review of the literature is presented. After a
brief presentation of the etymology of the word ‘mentor’ and the history of
mentoring in society, the literature is explored through the issues and themes
represented within it. ‘Definition or description’ is a strong theme from within the
selected literature. This exploration clearly offers a precedent and rationale for
the “thick description’ that is inherent in the Portraiture process.

Developmental process within the mentoring relationship is presented and
provides a foundation for later exposition from within the portraits.

In Researching mentoring relationships- a matter of perspective, the
research literature is further explored from the perspectives of the Protege, the
Mentor and the intact Dyad. These perspectives serve to situate description and
experience (phenomenology and ethnography) firmly within the research
literature. It is noted that the majority of the literature from the Protégé’s
perspective is outcome-oriented and is obtained and measured quantitatively-
from the positivist worldview. The majority of the research literature from the
Mentor’s perspective is experience-oriented and presented through qualitative,
experiential research methods.

Rounding out this extensive review are sections dealing with issues from
the literature that inform the worldviews and contexts of the research participants
(including the Portraitist): Training and Ethics in Mentoring; Mentoring and
Women- A Feminist View, and Mentoring in Music Therapy. Most notably, a
clear distinction is made between mentoring and supervision within the music
therapy context. The confusion between these two very different functions is

4

mirrored in the literature through critical and feminist methodologies; ethical
implications of mentoring inspire the reader toward clarity between mentoring
and supervision. The student/ supervisor relationship is presented as a possible
precursor relationship that through proximity holds ‘potential for resonance’
between junior and senior music therapists, but one that should not be confused
(and commonly is) with mentoring, possibly due to some shared functions.
Feminist and critical scholars are highly suspect of ‘in name only’ mentoring
relationships that veil supervisory relationships and perpetuate power
hierarchies.

Part two is titled Media and refers to the research processes that are used
to create the Portraits. In chapter four, Portraiture is presented as an arts-based
phenomenological research method. Arts informed and narrative in nature,
Portraiture ‘paints’ pictures in words; moving inward toward phenomena through
the experience of the collaborative research team: Participants and Portraitist
(researcher). This chapter moves from the general to the specific and back
again concluding in a discussion of Epistemology or arts-based ways of knowing,
weaving the Arts, Education and Music Therapy together toward an
interdisciplinary rationale for this method.

Part three is titled Exhibition: Performance of Findings and refers to the
time in the artistic process where the reader/observer participates in negotiating
meaning through personally experiencing the Portraits. This can also be
conceived of as a presentation of the ‘raw data.’The Portraits can be experienced
in many ways. I offer a path into the portraits through general groupings:

5

Framing the Terrain, Consonances, The Working Relationship, Ways of Being,
and Divergences. Each Portrait contains the words of the participants framed
within the perspective, experience and ruminative processes of the Portraitist
(researcher). The Portraiture process refers to this cycle as the Iterative Cycle,
and it is through this cycle that meaning is made.

I begin the Exhibition of the Portraits with a Preface to the Performance of
Findings. In this preface, I introduce the organizing agents of the Portraits,
offering new terminology that includes the musical interpretive worldview within
Portraiture methodology. In framing the terrain, the reader is introduced to and
situated within the participant’s place, the use of image and metaphor
foreshadowing essential themes of culture and gender- all situated within the
natural world,a stylistic feature and statement of the researcher/ portraitist’s
worldview. In this way, the canvas is primed, the reader is prepared to meet the
research participants and to take in their stories.

The iterative cycles of the Portraiture process then reveal emergent
themes through an inquiry into commonalities between participants that the
authors of this method call “searching for patterns” and “naming convergences”
(Lawrence-Lightfoot & Hoffman-Davis, 1997, pp. 185-214). In chapter 6, I begin
presenting and ruminating on convergences or consonances through the
reflections of the participants. I have chosen to organize these in a way that is
loosely based on the phases of the mentoring relationship as identified by Kram
(1985), and focused on qualities of ‘goodness’ in the relationships. Thus, the
essential themes are presented first through what I call the Prologue to the

6

Relation, progressing to Ways of Being within the working phase of the relation
and then toward Divergences, Dissonances, and Negative Space phenomena.
While these themes are loosely sequenced in this way, the Portraits themselves
are not linear. Excerpts are grouped together thematically (also referred to by
Lawrence Lightfoot and Hoffman Davis as ‘scaffolding,’ p, 259) rather than
chronologically, and analysis and interpretation are integrated into the Portraits to
preserve the aesthetic integrity of the work (Lawrence-Lightfoot & Hoffman-
Davis, p. 241-243).

The themes are restated and further interpreted through several discursive
points that offer a perspective on meaning concluding with a contemplation on
the implications of the study and recommendations for further research.

Ultimately, the purpose of this research is very personal. Through
studying the worldviews, practices, qualities and ways of being of exemplary
teacher/mentors in my field, I hoped to touch and develop qualities within myself
that could serve the next generation of music therapy professionals. Through
studying the gestalt of the mentoring dyad itself, I hoped to understand factors
that may contribute to the synergy available within the positive mentoring

relationship.

CHAPTER 2

The Story of the Question

I became interested in the experience of mentoring and being
mentored while in the midst of my doctoral studies in music therapy. I was given
responsibility for supervising several undergraduate students in their clinical
work. Though I had been a clinical supervisor for many years, I had not had the
opportunity to supervise more than one or two students per academic term. In
my graduate assistantship, I shared supervisory duties with one faculty member
and two other graduate assistants. I became aware very quickly that each of us
brought a unique style of supervision to these students. Our different styles
seemed to resonate with some students and not with others. This surprised me.
Writing this with the benefit of hindsight, I find it odd that I should feel surprise,
but I understand now that coming from a different culture of education and from
the perspective of the ‘preceptor’, (a professional who takes on a student within
the context of their own workplace and workload for clinical education), I had not
experienced the ‘neutral territory’ that a ‘free-standing clinic’ setting within an
American university engenders. So it was surprising to me that some students
would find my supervision style ineffective for them, just as others found it to be
very effective. I struggled to define myself as a supervisor. In 2000, there was a
dearth of literature that defined and explored the supervisor’s role in clinical
education. A most welcome edited volume was published in 2001 (Forinash,
2001) and reflected the many positions and perspectives occupied by music

therapy supervisors. Without specific training in supervision skills, many
8

professional music therapists default to supervisory behaviors that mirror the
ways in which they were supervised or mentored whether or not they are
appropriate to the current situation or the learning style of the student.

Exploring this phenomenon through my own reflective practice, I came to
the awareness that I too supervised in ways similar to the ways in which I was
supervised. I began to describe my style of supervision as a ‘mentoring’ style-
not really having a clear notion of what that was. Features I attributed to this
style at that time resonated with values that I actually held for students- that they
be independent, creative, talented, self-motivated and insightful. I seemed less
capable of working effectively with students who required detailed, skill-oriented
feedback. Other supervisor colleagues, I remember, seemed able to spend a lot
of time working with students in very detailed, skill-based arenas such as guitar
strumming patterns or being able to sing on pitch. I came to my supervisor’s job
with the assumption that these were basic skills that students should have in
place prior to working with clients and preferred to direct students toward
particular insights, ideas, ways of understanding their work or toward particular
resources. To be successful with this type of supervision obviously required my
students to be very independent, mature, disciplined and committed to the
learning process. I was indeed functioning as a mentor, not a supervisor. I now
know these two roles to be distinct and unique in substance and expectation.
Pursuing this research has clarified these distinctions for me. I hope that it will

offer clarity to others as well.

I knew early on in my doctoral program that I wanted to study mentoring. I
felt that I had not, for whatever reason, really connected with a mentor through
my doctoral education, and my experience and feelings about that soon came to
the forefront of my mind as containing some of my burning questions and
perhaps a direction for my research and future specialization. I lacked a clear
question at that time, and consulted with a former Michigan State University
faculty member who had expertise in qualitative inquiry. Through our
conversation, I came to feel that given the dearth of literature on the subject, I
could make a contribution to understanding mentoring through a study and
methodology that would be descriptive— painted with a broad brushstroke, if you
will— a portrait of mentoring relationships as they unfold between music
therapists.

I began talking to other therapists. I led a focus group on the subject at
the Canadian Association for Music Therapy National Conference in 2002. The
Canadians in particular seemed to have supervision and mentoring linked
inextricably together. This feature came from the background of my thinking into
the foreground in this study, and I now understand supervision as a potential
precursor relationship that may contain some of the elements of mentoring- but
one that has a different purpose, potential and outcomes. I find this knowledge
liberating.

In my conversations with other professionals at conferences and research
symposiums, I have had the opportunity to hear several stories of mentoring

relationships. Some of them were very positive, others were ambivalent, and still

10

others told stories of rupture and interpersonal damage, of painful transferences
and counter transferences. I made a choice to not explore these relationships in
this present research. I think that this decision is paradoxically reflective of a
predisposition toward holism. I believe myself to be a person who perceives life
as an irreducible whole, where positive and negative forces are held in balance.
That being said, I am also attracted to knowledge that can be obtained through
elaboration and intensification of focus on qualities of direct human experience.
In an effort to both delimit and remain true to my original intention: “the broad
brushstroke,” I made a decision to focus on positive mentoring relationships that
have stood the test of time, and where each member of the dyad is an active
member of the music therapy profession who makes ongoing contributions to it
through research, education, publishing or service. It is also my wish to explore
relationships that break down using a similar methodology. That is an area for
future research. All researchers make choices, and it is my choice to view these
two conditions separately.

In my current professional position, I occupy multiple locations: as a
protégé of senior and more experienced professionals; as an educator of
undergraduate students; as a clinical supervisor of both students, interns and
entry level professionals and as a coach and mentor to new clinical supervisors.
I even have the privilege of being called ‘mentor’ by a young and gifted musician
interested in music therapy, and a handful of former students. My experience of
mentoring contains layers and complexities as I am both mentored and provide

mentoring to a new generation of therapists. Fulfilling the trust that others place

11

in me is important to me. I want to mentor well, and so I endeavor to explore the
positivequalities of these relationships so that I might take these qualities in and
learn from them- and so that I might model my own behavior after these positive
exemplars.

Another personal feature I bring to this work is that I identify as a Feminist.
I am interested in the role of gender in the mentoring relationship, wondering if
men and women do it differently. Many of the music therapists I spoke with were
in same-gender mentoring relationships. I also sought out mixed-gender dyads.
This particular characteristic proved impossible to include in this research in an
active way, but the phenomenon itself is included in what I call ‘negative space
phenomena’- phenomena that are conspicuous by their absence and contributes
to knowledge through their contrasting qualities.

Finally, the research question itself has had many incarnations. This is a
reasonable and common feature of Portraiture and other constructivist
methodologies. The struggle for ‘a question’ initially was an imposed one as I
sought to make sense of my inquiry within the more positivist research culture of
my university. This resulted in what I would call ‘poor questions’ whose limits felt
restrictive in the face of the stories of relationships. I was really seeking an
articulate question that would both delimit and remain open to emerging themes

that were impossible to predict.

The Question

12

What can be understood about mentoring relationships between music
therapists from the stories of individuals who are engaged in positive mentoring

relationships?

13

CHAPTER 3
Mentoring as Human Occupation

A Review of Relevant Literature

Origins

The term ‘mentor’ can be traced back to Greek literature. In his epic poem
“The Odyssey,” Homer’s hero Odysseus entrusts the care of his young son to his
own trusted advisor: Mentor. Mentor serves in the role of advisor/guide to
Telemachus from childhood to adulthood. In The Odyssey, we see Mentor filling
several functions: while Telemachus is a young boy, Mentor’s role is
comprehensive. He sees to Telemachus’ physical care, education and psycho-
spiritual development. As Telemechus grows older, Mentor’s functions expand to
include influencing Telemachus as he socializes to his role in society and
advising him politically (Clawson, 1980). In this story, the Goddess Athena
chooses to embody herself as Mentor (presumably to capitalize on the profound
trust inherent in the long-term relationship between the men), in order to exert
influence over Telemachus. Thus, she challenges Telemachus forward toward
his destiny, ‘prods’ him out of the nest, as it were, to begin his own heroic
journey, the search for his father Odysseus (Graves, 1955; O’Neill, 1981;
Pennsylvania State University, 2001;;; Schwab, 1946). I feel particularly attracted
to this view of the Divine acting through Mentor to assist Telemachus toward his

heroic journey. This short snapshot within the epic informs a view of mentoring

14

that is multi-faceted, Involving physical, interpersonal, intrapsychic and spiritual
domains.

Later in 1699, Fenelon (In Telemaque), emphasizes Mentor as a character
and so in French (1749) and in English (1750) “mentor” became used as a
common noun meaning ‘wise counselor (Pennsylvania State University, 1991)

According to the Oxford Dictionary of English Etymology, ‘mentor’ comes
from the Indo-European root ‘men ‘meaning ‘to think’. Thus, we can understand
mentoring as operating mentally on behalf of another; holding another in mind;
literally paying attention or directing attention mindfully toward another. The
Greek suffix “or” literally means to “do a specified thing”. From this view, we can
have the sense of mentoring as an active process of working to hold another in
consciousness or in mind. This view communicates a quality of activity
associated with mentoring. It is mindful action on behalf of another. I emphasize
the origin of the word, because it seems to support an understanding of intention,
of what lies beneath ‘good’ mentoring. I feel that intention is an important place
to begin this exploration of what has become a significant topic in diverse fields
of study. Snowber (2005) suggests a different, yet supporting insight from the
word’s origins- grk- mentos, which means to have intent, purpose, spirit or
passion (p. 345). Modern mentoring relationships are both structured and
unstructured (also sometimes referred to in the literature as formal and informal,
constructed and spontaneously forming).

I feel that it is important to begin this inquiry from a place of including
explicit recognition of the actions of consciousness involved and the diverse

15

forces that influence and call the mentor forward into mindful action. A sense (as
deeper understanding is yet to be achieved) of these actions of consciousness at
this point helps us to remain open to conceive the origins of motivation, reward
and conflict within the interplay of the mentor- protégé relationship.

Modern mentoring traces its origins to trade apprenticeships in the early
cultures of Babylonia, Egypt, and Rome. The practice continued into the middle
ages and renaissance where apprenticeships were institutionalized into guilds
(Bosak, 2002), and where apprentice trainees were mentored into life-long
occupations (Little, 1990). Entry-level mentorships, internships and
preceptorships in professional fields such as education, medicine, law;
counseling and music therapy are influenced by these traditions. In these
relationships, young or entry- level individuals aspiring to careers in a particular
field would apply to a senior individual to become an apprentice. Apprentices
would often serve the master craftsman for a number of years in hope of learning
as much as possible of the master’s skill with a view to either starting one’s own
center of craft, or inheriting the work of the master. In contemporary times, this
view of the long term mentorship- where the protégé takes on the work and focus
of the master mentor is very prevalent in science and physics where the ultimate
criterion for mentoring excellence is the ability to reproduce after one’s own kind
(Kanigel, 1986; Kennedy, 1997; Zuckerman, 1996 in Christiansen, 2001 p. 52).

In contemporary practice, the phenomenon of mentoring has inspired an
extensive body of literature across diverse fields of study (Wilson 8 Johnson,

2001). The word now refers to patterned behaviors or processes whereby one

16

person acts as a mentor to another. Historically informal, voluntary, mutual, and
self-selected, mentoring today is commonly formally programmed within
institutions, organizations, and educational settings (Graham, Hudson-Ross,

Adkins, McWhorter, & McDuffle Stewart, 1999; Nickols, 2001).

Issues and Themes
As previously mentioned, the literature on mentoring is extensive. Just as
there are common themes and ideas about defining mentoring, there seem to be
common issues and themes that contribute to greater understanding of some of

the themes that are emergent within this study.

Definition or Description?

Definitions, like boundaries, are useful in describing what something is
and what it is not. The concept of a fixed definition is not one that resonates well
with complex, process oriented and relational social phenomena like mentoring.
Acknowledging the challenges inherent in defining mentoring absolutely, the
literature offers a range of definitions that can be distilled down to reflect the
notion of a senior and more experienced individual assisting a junior, less
experienced individual across a number of domains (Christiansen, 2001; Kram,
1985; Snowber, 2005; Wilson & Johnson, 2001). In my supervisor training
courses I define the mentor as “an experienced, highly regarded individual who
guides another over an extended period of time. This guidance may involve the
development and re-examination of career and personal goals. No evaluation

occurs in these relationships” (Merrill, 2004). Similarly, a significant amount of
17

the mentoring literature is devoted to uncovering descriptors with the intention to
deepen understanding of the nature of mentoring. Among the descriptors and
metaphors used are artist, midwife, parent, coach, safety net, compass, sculptor,
teacher, trainer, counselor, wise guide, role model, supporter, promoter, trusted
colleague, supervisor, and champion (Clawson, 1980; Ganser, 1999; Gehrke,
1988; Jacobi, 1991; Little, 1990; Parsloe, 1992; Phillips-Jones, 1982; Shea,
1994; Snowber, 2005; Wilson & Johnson, 2001). One problem with strict
definitions, descriptors and metaphors is that depending on which terms are the
most resonant for a person, the qualities inherent in those terms may drive
function and perhaps limit the integration of other qualities represented by some
of the other terminology, or prevent new and creative approaches to present
needs from emerging spontaneously. There is, for instance, a qualitative
difference between a coach and a counselor, a promoter and a parent, a safety
net and a trainer. Yet all these terms reflect an aspect of the phenomenon of
mentoring as perceived by both mentors and protégés. The process of teasing
out meaning from phenomena, as mentors and protégés directly experience it is,
by definition, highly subjective. The subjective nature of ‘mentoring as
experienced’ leads me to embrace that diversity. There is no ‘one way’ to
mentor; though a sincere and earnest person may wish for some clarification as
to function. Mentoring is idiosyncratic to individuals, purpose, location,
philosophy, discipline; whether or not the relationships are spontaneously
forming or formal and structured within institutions. Still, central images,
metaphors and descriptors such as those listed above are useful to individuals

18

who are trying to negotiate the waters as mentors. I hope that this study will
contribute to that lexicon for music therapists.

Ganser (1999) established a need for mentor training in the field of education
(p. 42) and suggests that descriptors and metaphors (such as those listed above)
provide valuable clues to the complexities of mentoring. Viewed holistically, it is
possible to be both a coach and a counselor. Kram (1985) and Thomas and
Kram (1988) conceive of mentoring relationships as serving both occupational
and psychosocial functions. Occupational/career functions include sponsorship,
coaching, protecting, and providing challenges. Psychosocial functions include
role modeling, socializing to the profession, acceptance and confirmation,
counseling and friendship. This function serves to enhance competence, self-

esteem and identity development (Wilson & Johnson, 2001).

Developmental Processes

Kathy Kram’s early work (1983) on mentoring is considered to be a classic
and seminal work in this field, and no examination of mentoring phenomenon
would be complete without a review of this work. She notes that mentoring is
first a relationship. Specifically, “a developmental relationship typically occurring
between senior and junior individuals within organizations.” In 1985, she
described four developmental phases of mentoring relationships: Initiation,
Cultivation, Separation, and Redefinition.

The Initiation phase is characterized by fantasies that mentors and
protégés have about one another professionally. It is a time in the unfolding

relationship when prospective mentors and protégés become aware of their
19

attractiveness to one another. Allen, Poteet and Burroughs (1997) identify self-
reflection as a predominant factor in protégé attractiveness. Other attractiveness
factors include openness and willingness to learn, initiative, confidence, and
flexibility. The initiation phase describes the first 6 to 12 months of the
relationship.

During the Cultivation phase, both parties explore the potential for the
relationship. Mentorship functions are optimized during this period as the parties
learn more about one another’s capabilities and negotiate the benefits to each of
participating in the mentorship. Much of the research literature pertaining to
outcomes and perceived benefits to mentors and protégés come from
relationships within this phase. Kram notes that this phase of the relationship
can last from 2 to 5 years as the mentor promotes and protects the protégé, and
as the protégé continues to learn from the mentor.

Separation. The separation phase occurs when the protégé begins to act
with more independence. The protégé functions increase while the mentor’s
functions decrease. This phase involves a psychological detaching process that
dyads sometimes report being fraught with conflict. Wherever this phase occurs
across the lifespan of the dyad, Kram suggests that it may take from 6 to 24
months to separate, and may involve any combination of dynamics of
individuation including ruptures, power and influence issues or resistance. Kram
notes that separation usually occurs mutually; however, it is possible for
complications of separation to occur for either member of the dyad. One or both

parties may perceive the separation as a ‘break-up.’

20

Redefinition. In this fourth and final phase of the mentoring relationship,
Kram describes the end of the mentoring relationship as a time when the dyad
evolves the relationship to one of informal contact, mutual support and caring.
The power structure of the relationship becomes less pronounced as the parties
construct a more ‘peer-Iike’ relationship. Crutcher (2007) also speaks to issues
of ‘horizontal and vertical’ hierarchies as being operant in mentoring
relationships. Indeed, in this present study, the keywords ‘horizontal’ and
‘vertical’, i.e. the movement from being mentor-protege to the more egalitarian
position of respected peer, are a feature of negative space findings presented
later in this document.

Chao (1997) conducted the first empirical examination of these phases in
a longitudinal study of 428 engineering alumni over a 5 -year period. Kram’s
phases were supported by the results of this study. The mean mentorship length
reported for each phase was consistent with Kram’s guidelines. Additionally, the
mean lengths for the phases were in the correct order with the shortest length
reported for the initiation phase and the longest length reported for the

redefinition phase.

21

 

Researching Mentoring Relationships- a matter of perspective
Voice1 seems to be a primary point of departure for much of the mentoring
research. Represented within the literature are the perspectives of the protégé,

mentor and to a lesser extent, the dyad itself.

The Protégé

By far the most common theme in the protégé’s perspective literature is
that of evaluating the effectiveness of the mentoring experience. Some earlier
studies use Kram’s previously identified work as a measure and test for outcome
measures in the areas of career and psychosocial functions (Ayers, 2005; Burke
& McKeen, 1997; Chao, 1997; Montague, 2000; Noe, 1988; Ragins & Cotton,
1999 ). Other studies seek to understand character traits among both protégés
and mentors, this from the perspective of the protégé (Burke 8 McKeen, 1997;
Hicks, 2007; Stolzenberg, 2006). Contemporary social research in business,
leadership and development and education are beginning to focus on what they
term ‘the relation’ - seeking to understand the qualities of this ‘relation’ through
the experience of the protégé (Alston, 2006; Liang, Tracy, Taylor & Williams,
2002;). Finally, a small percent of the literature is narrative in nature: gathering
the stories of protégés to illuminate both the experience of mentoring as a whole
and to understand actual functions and attitudes of mentors (Alston, 2006;

French, 1997; Simmons, 2007;).

 

1 ‘Voice’ is a complex topic in both qualitative research and Feminist and Critical Studies. In this
instance, ‘voice’ refers, in part, to different perspectives and positions occupied by members of
the mentoring alliance.

22

The Mentor

As the previously mentioned research focuses on the perspective of the
protégé, a lesser percentage of the research focuses on the perspective of the
mentor. A representative sample of the literature reveals that only a small
percentage of this research is positivist in nature. The vast majority of published
and unpublished materials from the mentor’s perspective are qualitative, and
much of that is phenomenological. Less emphasis is placed on outcomes and
more emphasis is placed on processes and the social phenomena of mentoring.
Allen, Poteet and Burroughs (1997) interviewed 27 mentors, investigating issues
related to the decision to mentor. Others seek to determine the degree to which
mentors were mentored themselves (Brown-Anderson, Linder, 8 Sexton, 2005;
Mysyk, 2005), and to identify key events that led to mentor identity development
(Marvin, 2005; Mysyk, 2005;). Snowber (2005) relates mentoring of graduate
students with qualities of arts creation: specifically exploring mentoring as an act
of deep internal and external listening. The author likens mentoring to the ways in
which artists must also listen while embedded in the artistic process. Humble,
Richards, Solomon, Allen, Blaisure and Johnson (2006) examine feminist
mentoring practices through the stories of four mentors, and Crutcher (2007)
uses interviews to investigate several mentor’s cross-cultural experiences of
mentoring a diverse group of university students. Finally, Eby, Durley, Evans
and Regins (2006) explore the degree to which short-term benefits of mentoring
predicted long-term mentor career success. The results of this particular study

do not support the notion that mentoring results in career success for the mentor.
23

It appears from this sample of literature from the mentor’s perspective, that the
benefits of mentoring others are primarily psychosocial. This is not dissimilar to
the general tenor of the results for protégés.

Results presented by Allen, Poteet and Burroughs (1997) are particularly
relevant to my study in that they kindled my own curiosities about attractiveness
and informed my choice of interview questions. These authors used in-depth
interviewing to investigate issues relating to the decision to mentor others. They
explored four areas of inquiry: individual reasons for mentoring others,
organizational factors that influence mentoring, attraction factors, and outcomes
associated with mentoring for the mentor. The mentors (N=27) involved in this
study were involved in informal mentoring relationships. Three dominant
attractiveness factors were identified:

1- The protégé served as a reflection of the self

2- The protege demonstrated high competency and ability

3- The protégé demonstrated an open-ness and willingness to learn.
Allen, Poteet and Burroughs’ findings are supportive of my own findings on
protégé attractiveness and I shall discuss this in the performance of findings later

in this document.

The Dyad

Brofenbrenner (1979) states that the defining condition of a dyad has to do
with the presence of a ‘relation’ in both directions. A dyad is formed whenever
two persons ‘pay attention’ to one another. Dyads are explicitly reciprocal.

Brofenbrenner's contribution to the understanding of dyadic relations and their
24

 

role in human development contribute to my analysis of findings and the concept
of ‘paying attention’, mindfulness, and resonance are referred to throughout the
performance of findings later in this document.

An overwhelming majority of the literature pertaining to mentoring focuses
on either the perspective of the Mentor or on the perspective of the Protégé.
There has been a noticeable increase in research recently that includes the
perspective of both members of the dyad as a unit. Several authors from diverse
disciplines acknowledge a gap in the literature with respect to intact dyadstudies:
Bidan (2006) from health care administration; Campbell 8 Campbell, (2000);
Edwards 8 Gordon (2006); McCarron, (2006) from Higher Education; Fagenson-
Eland, Marks 8 Amendola, (1997) from Business Administration; Lentz, 2007;
Schatz, (2006) 8 Sundli, (2007) from Education Administration and Teacher
Training and Wanberg, Kammeyer-Mueller 8 Marchese, (2006) from
Organizational Psychology.

Fagenson-Eland, Marks and Amendola (1997) make an early attempt to
address the dyad itself in their article “Perceptions of Mentoring Relationships”.
In a creative research design, the authors create a virtual dyad from the
responses to surveys of self-identified mentors and protégés. The researchers
contacted human resources departments and requested contact with employees
who were known to have been either formally or informally mentored. They
contacted the prospective protégés and requested the names and addresses of
persons they identified as mentors. In this way, the authors sought to create the

intact dyad. This was not as successful as anticipated, as a much smaller

25

sample size for mentors than for protégés emerged. Essentially, the researchers
seem to split up the dyad, effectively defeating the purpose of studying the intact
pair. The researchers sent surveys to the groups of mentors and protégés, by
this time unequal in number. The data analysis effectively re-constituted the pair
into an unrelated ‘virtual dyad’.

Themes from these dyad studies are not unlike those previously
mentioned. Some concern mentoring outcomes (Schatz, 2006; Wanberg,
Kammeyer-Meuller, Marchese, 2006). Others concern dispositional
characteristics of effective mentors and protégés (Bidan, 2006; Campbell 8
Campbell, 2000; McCarron, 2006). There are; however, interesting new themes
that have emerged from these investigations. Sundli (2007) explores issues in
mentoring from the perspective of relationship theory. Edwards and Gordon
(2006) were able to elicit a large sample size (93 dyads) and explore the
expectations of both parts of the relation.

One of the remarkable features of this work is that they focus on the
mentoring relations between students and academic mentors who are connected
through distance education— where the tasks of these formal relationships are
undertaken without physical proximity; that is, without ‘in-person’ contact. This is
an extremely valuable perspective to obtain, as distance education is one very
prominent model that has been underrepresented in the literature. While the
expectations of mentoring tasks, functions and outcomes are similar to ‘in-

person’ academic mentorships, enactment and communication is completely

26

different and requires new and creative approaches to make these relationships
truly effective. U

Proximity and physical distance is further explored in a dynamic piece by
Jipson and Paley (2000) who explore their own co-mentoring collaboration
across a 25-year period of professional association. This piece and their larger
work, Questions of you and the struggle of collaborative life (Jipson 8 Paley,
2000), explore roles, boundaries, dynamics and power in an in-depth and
personally reflective style.

Schatz (2006) highlights the mentoring context as a strong determinant of
the successful mentoring relationship. This theme emerged from her study of 16
new teachers and their 6 mentors. Mentors and IVlentees identified the shared
setting, a common purpose, being in the same community and agreed upon rules
as the elements of context that were most critical to their ‘success’. Shared
context is a feature of my own research presented herein and is given explicit
attention through Portraiture methodology (Lawrence-Lightfoot 8 Hoffman-Davis,
1997)

McCarron (2006) offers a methodological breath of fresh air to a common
theme in mentoring research: that of the protégé’ and mentor’s perception of the
mentoring relationship. What is fresh here is that she does not rely on previously
hypothesized characteristics, but rather uses grounded theory methodology to
identify positive characteristics of both good mentors and good protégés, factors
that contribute to healthy mentoring relationships and the role of power

differentials in those relationships. This study also addresses context as it is

27

Canadian and offers insight to Canadian culture and values as distinct from other
cultures.

Finally, another creative exploration of the intact mentoring dyad is
reflected in “The Dialogue Journal” (Wallace, 1999). The dialogue journal is a
common conceptual framework in collaborative inquiry circles. In this piece,
Wallace uses the dialogue journal as a facilitative tool for reflection between
teacher mentors and teacher candidates. In addition to the journal facilitating
communication between the dyad the journal communicates much of the
subjective state of being for both mentor and candidate: the stories of their days
in the classroom and commentaries on the ways in which the candidate feels
supported (or not) in the classroom. The journals are conversational and one has
the sense in the reading, the type of relationship that exists between the
partners. Dialogue journaling does not seek to aggregate data in the classic
sense of phenomenology or ethnography; however Wallace applies some
interpretive form implicitly when she groups certain kinds of journal entries into
themes of Observations, Questions and Reflections. In this work, she allowed

the relational aspects of the tool to remain tacit.

Ethics and Training in Mentoring

A small percentage of the mentoring literature addresses ethical
mentoring behavior directly (Eby 8 Allen, 2002; Sundli, 2006; Wilson 8 Johnson,
2001). Ethical mentoring can be inferred from much of the literature that
uncovers mentor behavior, characteristics and even negative outcomes of

mentoring through treatment of what constitutes ‘good mentoring.
28

Contributions to an understanding of ethical issues in mentoring are made
by the post-modem and critical theorists (Colley, 2002; Sundli, 2007), feminist
ethicists (Humble, Solomon, Allen, Blaisure 8 Johnson, 2006; Manathunga,
2007), faith-based literature in pastoral counseling and education, and from the
field of ethical leadership (Hitt, 1990; Howell 8 Avolio, 1992; Kelly, 1997). Power
and influence are universally acknowledged as factors that set the stage and
open up the potential for unethical behavior.

Virtually all discussions of ethics within the mentoring relationship pertain
to the mentor exercising ethical behavior toward the protege. Authors have
different recommendations about addressing issues of ethics in mentoring
relationships, but most recommend mentor training. Feminist literature advocates
mentors becoming aware of the rigid power structures they function within and
through self-reflection, discover ways in which they perpetuate these power
structures. Faith-based (Christian) pastoral counseling literature advocates a
focus on core qualities and ‘virtues’ to be aspired to (Wilson 8 Johnson, 2001).

Unethical mentoring behavior is described as “an individual is driven by
self-interest and relies on manipulation, deception, and dominance to meet one’s
own goals” (Hitt, 1990 in Eby 8 Allen, 2002, p. 472). Eby and Allen (2002)
conducted a study of negative mentoring experiences and grouped these
experiences into two factors- factor 1 (Distancing/Manipulative behavior) has
ethical implications and factor 2 (Poor dyadic fit) is ethically neutral. The
participants of this study identified the following behaviors within factor 1-

manipulative behavior: deceit, sabotage, credit taking, inappropriate delegation

29

and abuse of power. Participants also list intentional exclusion, neglect and self-
absorption within the distancing feature of this factor. These findings corroborate
other findings from the literature on ethical leadership (Howell 8 Avolio, 1992;
Tepper, 2000).

It should be noted that all of these data come from studies conducted with
formal/ structures/assigned mentorships. The trend for unethical behavior is not
supported within self-selected, informal mentoring relationships. The obvious
explanation for this is that mentors and protégés who self-select operate within
more voluntary agreements from both parties. Furthermore, mentors and
protégés are more likely to terminate problematic relationships when they are
structurally free to do so (Eby 8 Allen, 2002; Wilson 8 Johnson, 2001).

Mentor training is seen as necessary for workplace mentors and for
professionals who mentor entry- level teachers (and I would submit, music
therapists). Training is seen as being problematic in settings where mentoring is
a function that is embedded in the responsibilities of senior figures such as those

that occur in higher education (Wilson 8 Johnson, 2001).

Mentoring and Women- a Feminist View

There is a body of literature that explores gender in mentoring; some
explore this explicitly. Feminist authors predictably offer fine critical analyses of
mentoring practices and relational theory. They offer contributions in themes of
power, hierarchy, influence, boundaries, and ethical and cultural issues in
mentoring (Burke 8 McKeen, 1997; Crutcher, 2007; Ervin, 1995; Humble,

Richards, Solomon, Allen, Blaisure 8 Johnson, 2006; Liang, Tracy, Taylor 8
30

Williams, 2002; Manathunga, 2007; Noe, 1988; Sundli, 2006). I am very
interested in issues of gender and power, both because I identify as a feminist
and because the participant dyads in my study are homogenous in terms of
gender. Indeed, I was unable to find an intact, mixed gender mentoring dyad of
greater than 10 years duration. I discuss this phenomenon more fully in Chapter
4- Methodology.

In a relatively early contribution to the discourse on gender in mentoring,
Burke and McKeen (1997), sought to understand the personal characteristics of
both mentors and protégés, i.e. who mentors and who is likely to be mentored.
They polled women alumnae of a large business school and sought to assess
the degree to which personal characteristics predict mentoring activity. In this
study, women were relatively young (mean age 30), young to their careers (1-10
years), married and childless, working in organizations of diverse size at lower
managerial levels. These women reported experiencing only modest
professional or career outcomes from their mentoring relationships, but rather
associated personal or psychosocial outcomes with having been mentored.
None of the 280 women-with-mentors polled worked for companies with formal
mentoring programs, but had cultivated an alliance with a mentor independently.
This study based their questionnaire on Kram’s (1983) developmental process
and further supported its validity especially as regards initiation and ending. The
‘successful’ mentoring relationships lasted an average of 5 years.

The outcomes and discussion of the results of Burke and McKeen are

worth comment, I feel, as they impact a discussion of gender. As previously

31

stated, the researchers found that only modest work outcomes were reported
over a limited number of work functions for the respondents. They conclude from
this that for women in business, mentoring may have less impact on work
outcomes than for men. This result can be discussed in a number of ways. The
criterion measure itself may have polled for work outcomes that were irrelevant to
lived lives of women at work. The indicators chosen were: Intent to quit, job
satisfaction, career satisfaction, job involvement and promotion prospects. While
these indicators seem plausible enough, I wonder who determined these
indicators, if they were women and if they were Canadian women- or if the
outcome indicators were based on work values held by men, and if they were
from the Canadian cultural context or some other context.

Another reason for the modest work outcomes could be design related.
Control subjects were not included in this design. Doing so might have indicated
a relative difference between mentored or non-mentored women in the business
workplace.

Finally, the obvious should be stated. Women do not advance in the
business environment to the same degree and rate as men (Valien, 1999).
There is a possibility that the most positive mentoring relationship might not
facilitate advancement in an organization where there are covert gender
preferences. From the perspective of this argument, it is interesting to note that
all the mentors referred to in this study were in higher managerial positions than

the respondents, and all were men.

32

Noe (1988) acknowledged gender characteristics in his early study of
protégés and mentors. Results showed that “mentors matched with protégés of
the opposite gender reported that the protégés utilized the relationship more
effectively than did protégés of the same gender as the mentor” (p. 475). He
posited that perhaps dyad members ‘work harder’ to make the relationship
effective because of an awareness of “possible negative outcomes that are
believed to result form cross-gender relationships at work” (p. 475). Further,
Noe notes that according to mentor subjects, female protégés utilized the
mentoring relationship better than male protégés. This is not a surprising result
given the notion that women tend to be more relational than men (Claes, 2001).
It should be noted, and Noe acknowledges this, that the participants of this study
were consistent with stereotypical gender roles. Protégé participants were from
the woman-dominated field of education; male mentors were those educators
who had moved up into positions of authority and management in education.
This is not unlike the female dominated field of music therapy, where males tend
to rise to positions of authority in a disproportionate percentage to their relative
prevalence in the field.

Manathunga (2007) addresses power and influence in supervision and
mentoring head-on in her article Supervision as mentoring: The role of power and
boundary crossing. She suggests that mentoring is a powerful form of
normalization and a ‘site of governmentality.’ That mentoring advocates
dishonestly promote an image of mentoring as value-free when promoted within

institutions. She refers to this practice as nothing more than a thinly veiled

33

attempt at masking the supervisory relationship. She is joined in this criticism by
Sundli (2006) who notes an imbalance in the research toward a favorable view, a
lack of reasoned criticism, and away from studies of negative mentoring
experiences. In failing to provide such balance, Sundli maintains, the
understanding and practice of mentoring will not progress conceptually. Her
paper provides such criticism.

Crutcher (2007) provides a fascinating cross-cultural perspective on
mentoring as she studied both male and female mentors’ experiences in
mentoring protégés that were of a different culture or race than themselves. She
pays particular attention to gender and quotes a male mentor who reflects:

As a man, I need some different guidelines for how to mentor
women...l need to be particularly careful in mentoring women to be
cognizant of their boundaries, to be cognizant of their sexuality, not to
intrude in ways that can be misinterpreted or that open the doors to
inappropriate kinds of relationships. As a straight white man, those kinds
of boundaries are easier to work out with men than with women. (p. 3)

Still, another male mentor speaks to a different approach:

I find...that men are socialized to pursue things fairly directly
and linearly, and women are socialized to be perhaps more holistic
in their approach to issues or problems or matters of concern, to
not necessarily come at something from the perspective of ‘okay,
we have a problem, so we come up with solutions. (p. 3)

Clearly, these two perspectives, offered by male mentors remind us to avoid
generalization in terms of gender or pre-judging a mentor or protégé based on
gendeh

It is important to note that women dominate the profession of music

therapy. According to American Music Therapy Association and the Certification
34

Board of Music Therapists cited in Hadley, 20062, 88% of music therapists are
females. and 88% of board-certified music therapists with master’s degrees are
females. Of the board-certified music therapists with doctoral degrees, this ratio
decreases significantly- 74% female to 26% male. Finally, of those members
who report their job title as being a faculty member at a University or College,
73% are female and 27% are male. According to Hadley, These demographics
indicate a “disproportionate number of males in music therapy in the United
States who earn doctorates and who hold University positions” (p. 19). Further, a
most disturbing revelation is that of the music therapists in faculty positions at
Universities and colleges in the United States, the average salary for females is
50,690.91 as opposed to 61,166.67 for men (Hadley, 2006). Hadley and
Edwards (2006) examined the gender of published authors in music therapy
peer-reviewed journals and found that a 60% to 40% female to male ratio exists.
This statistic would suggest that females are publishing at a disproportionately
lower level than men. They further state: “when combined with the Information
about salaries and academic appointments in the US it is cause for concern that
gender seems to correlate with salary, attainment of doctoral qualifications, and
employment in an academic post. This is a worthy topic for ongoing comment
and discussion” (p. 19).

From these demographic statistics, we can infer that in a given
educational setting, the chances of a female music therapy graduate student

being mentored by a male advisor/mentor is probable, further enhancing the

 

2 From 2004 demographic information obtained from the American Music Therapy Association
and the Certification Board for Music Therapists.
35

potential for power relationships within music therapy education to be operating
on the mentoring relationship. Awareness of the role of power and influence in
educational mentoring regardless of the gender of Mentor and Protégé is

fundamental to positive outcomes in the relationship.

Mentoring in Music Therapy

There are no published studies or articles on mentoring relationships in
music therapy, yet many advanced practitioners and music therapy educators
(polled informally) respond in the affirmative when asked if they have had a
mentor. Mentoring has not been referred to explicitly in the current music
therapy supervision literature, though similar or related terminology has been
used when alluding to qualities of the supervisory relationship. I will discuss the
apparent confusion between roles, functions and qualities of mentoring and
supervision later in this document. It is important to note that the confusion that
exists between mentoring and supervising is extremely prevalent and a
significant part of the phenomena, thus worth exploring more fully.

Memory, Unkefer, and Smeltekop (1987) introduce yet another term as
they explore music therapy internship supervisor “management styles.” These
authors identify three primary roles within these management styles: teacher,
counselor, and colleague. In this discussion, they imply a multiplicity of ways of
being for both intern and supervisor, though they do not speak to the

developmental or relational aspects of these roles.

36

Feiner (2001) presents a developmental process within the intern-
supervisor relationship in music therapy and develops Chazan’s (1990) work on
the same subject. Feiner divides the supervisory relationship into three phases:

The Creation of Sm - In this first phase, the supervisor and intern
develop a trusting relationship that is described as being like ‘home base’, a
place where an intern can return while exploring and experimenting with their
personal style.

Structure bgildinq- This heading contains two sub-categories: Twinning
and Separation-lndividuation. During the twinning phase the intern focuses on
how ‘Iike them’ the supervisor is. The intern learns the supervisor’s way of
working using him or her as a model. The supervisor adjusts him/herself to the
intern’s individual style, enhancing rather than negating preexisting patterns.
When the intern no longer needs this twinning, they begin to move into the
separation-individuation phase. They become less dependent upon imitation and
begin to develop a clinical style that is more characteristic of their own strengths
and values. This phase can be characterized by differences of opinion and
power struggles. These differences are considered ‘normal’ to the process of
establishing a separate identity.

I Reciprocity and Well-Being. In this phase, the intern has developed a
professional identity and has a sense of inner well-being. It is characterized by
reciprocity between the supervisor and the intern. During this stage, termination

occurs. Mentor functions per se are not mentioned in this work, though there

37

are some resonances with the Kram (1983) and Chao (1997) developmental
phases studies mentioned previously.

Finally, in an unpublished master’s thesis, Cawood (1999), studied music
therapy intern’s perceptions of mentoring within the supervisory relationship. As
it is, to date, the only inquiry into mentoring relationships within the music therapy
literature, I will address this study more fully.

This survey study polled music therapy interns’ perceptions of the degree
of mentoring experienced in the internship portion of their clinical education.

The findings revealed a significant inverse relationship between perceived
degree of mentoring and supervisor’s age, years of music therapy experience,
and years of supervisory experience.

Cawood takes a position early in his thesis that assumes mentoring to be
a salient part of the supervisor/intern relationship. He uses Parsloe’s (1995)
definition of mentoring. In this definition, Parsloe places the mentor in the
workplace as a professional who guides a student through the necessary tasks
that lead to professional qualification. In so doing Cawood identifies the chief
critique of his own work, which is that mentoring is more often defined as existing
in a power-free or power-neutral environment. I submit that while there is
undoubtedly an opportunity to initiate a mentoring relationship within the
internship, the relationship has no possibility of reaching maturity and fruitfulness
in that setting due to the inherent power structure and the short length of time the
intern and supervisor are actually positioned together. The assumption that
mentoring is salient to the supervisory relationship is, I believe, a pervasive one

38

that is a source of much confusion among both supervisors and music therapy
students and interns. In a recent article, Edwards and Daveson (2004) speak to
the role of the power differential and its role in resistance within the supervision
relationship in final placement student music therapists. In so doing, they cite
Feiner (2001) who states that students may become confused with the
multiplicity and shifting nature of roles the supervisor takes on. Knowing that the
supervisor is responsible for evaluation in totality or part affects the level of trust
and authenticity that the student may be capable of bringing to the relationship.
Methodologically, Cawood relies solely on the use of the Noe (1988)
mentoring functions scale. The Noe scale was developed for use between
professionals. The study for which this tool was created examined mentoring
functions of teachers who were interested in career development. The mentoring
program was part of a comprehensive education program sponsored by a
particular school district. The average age of protégé was 40, and the majority of
protégés held master’s degrees. There were more assistant principals than
teachers or counselors in Noe’s sample. In short, the power structure of the Noe
study was very different to music therapy study. Noe wisely tested for locus of
control, understanding the role of power and control and the barrier these
dynamics place on the mentoring relationship. In the Noe study, participants
indicated a significant internal locus of control. Cawood, in his choice of the Noe
scale, assumes a level of generalization perhaps not applicable to the music
therapy interns involved in his study. Granted, Noe suggests that his scale be

tested for applicability to private sector dyads, but later cautions that his tool

39

would be limited in situations where performance assessment and evaluation
were components of the relationship. Again, the role of the music therapy clinical
supervisor has an inherent power structure in that supervisors evaluate the
performance of interns and are ultimately responsible for the intern’s
performance within their own clinical settings.

As previously stated, this study showed a significant inverse relationship
between perceived mentoring and supervisor’s age, years of music therapy
experience, and years of supervisory experience. Cawood suggests that as
music therapists age, they become “burned out” and “in a rut” (pg. 115 ).
Further, that the difference in ages between the supervisors in his study (mean
age 40) and interns (mean age 20) prevents the supervisor from ‘relating to’ the
intern. This view implies a definition or practice of mentoring that isperhaps
more peer-centered than is currently in use among music therapists. It suggests
that a relationship where power and influence, based on an advanced or senior
therapist working mindfully on behalf of and serving both functional and
psychosocial needs for a younger, entry level music therapist, is neither effective
nor optimal. | feel that Cawood’s study effectively illustrates the previously
referred to ‘confusion’ that exists within the music therapy community between
supervision and mentoring. It is my hope that this present inquiry will go some
way toward reducing that confusion.

It is not my intention to completely negate the importance of the Cawood
study, for it reflects assumptions that are extremely pervasive among the large

number of individuals that have been involved in my supervisor training courses

40

over the past several years. I can only deduce that these or similar assumptions
are held by the majority of music therapists. Yet, it is important to illustrate the -
gaps in Cawood’s study, as they provide a view into the reasons why supervisory
relationships are alternately effective and ineffective, and why they are
substantively different from mentoring relationships.

Cawood does not discuss the role of learning styles in the internship
relationship as does Feiner (2001), cognitive characteristics and internal or
external frameworking as do I in a current work (Merrill, 2007), nor does he make
an attempt to acknowledge, measure or study the developing interpersonal
relationship as does Chazan (2001). Neither does he poll both members of the
supervisory alliance but limits his inquiry to the intern’s perspective. Supervisor
reports could have been used to verify some of the self-report information such
as the extent to which the supervisors attempted to provide certain functions. As
a 20-year veteran internship supervisor and now undergraduate educator, I can
attest to my very best collaborative efforts failing with certain students and interns
who look to their supervisors as absolute authorities and with an expectation that
they will be provided with absolute answers and not challenged toward critical
thinking and reflexivity even at the internship level. Noe himself acknowledges
the limitations of attempting to measure social phenomena as complex as
mentoring with self-report as the sole source of data. As previously mentioned,
Cawood applies Noe’s tool exclusively to a group of individuals substantively

different from the group for whom it was designed.

41

Additionally, the survey items themselves are, at times, irrelevant. Cawood
as a music therapist did not adapt or re-design this scale based on what is
important to music therapists about mentoring. In one question, for example, the
intern is asked if the supervisor had asked them for suggestions concerning
problems s/he has encountered at school as opposed to the clinical placement.
This survey does not ask whether the intern and supervisor make music
together, or co-Iead music therapy groups. These are much more common and
relevant indicators of interpersonal related-ness for music therapists. The
problem with evaluative surveys such as this scale is that the questions
themselves imply a standard of ‘goodness’ (in this case mentoring) that may not
correspond to universally accepted qualities of effective supervision. Further,
these questions were not established as relevant to mentoring relationships in
music therapy, but to relationships between mid-level managerial teachers. And
finally, it does not reference differences based on gender. In short, the internal
validity of this tool is in question in terms of its application to music therapists.

The Cawood study clearly seeks to understand intern’s perceptions of the
degree to which they were mentored during their internship. Music therapy
internships rarely extend beyond six months. Both Kram and Noe support the
notion that constructed mentoring relationships rarely yield long-term results.
Kram (1985) suggests that the first year of a mentoring relationship is
characterized by task orientation. Given the short term nature of the internship
and the competency-based nature of the evaluation component, it is not

surprising that supervisors scored low on the psychosocial support measures.

42

To conclude, I do not believe the Cawood study yields the hoped for
baseline measurement of mentoring among clinical supervisors and music
therapy interns. This being said, the work is most valuable in that it provides
support for an intuition that there are certain functions that the mentoring
relationship and the supervisory relationship have in common. Further it
illuminates the topic and clearly establishes a need for further research into
professional social phenomena as they unfold in the lives of music therapists. It
is a very good beginning, and one that helps point researchers in a different
direction.

From my study of the literature and from the stories of music therapists
included in this research, I am persuaded that mentoring relationships are potent
and dynamic interpersonal experiences that evolve over time, that hold potential
in each phase of development for growth and benefit or rupture and
disintegration at any point along the path. Individuals involved in mentoring
relationships experience conflict, necessary role shifting, and a variety of
interpersonal phenomena. These relationships are so potent, in fact, that Wilson
and Johnson (2001) assert that they hold the potential for unique ethical risks
and advocate a set of core virtues, namely courage, integrity, and care, for the

ethical practice of mentoring (p. 121 ).

43

Part 2
MEDIA
CHAPTER 4.
Methodology

Portraiture

The holistic nature of a story crosses multiple cultures of inquiry. In order
to provide a broad and descriptive portrayal of two successful mentoring
relationships, I chose “Portraiture” (Lawrence-Lightfoot 8 Hoffman-Davis 1997)
as a research approach. Portraiture is ultimately a phenomenological narrative
approach to inquiry that is concerned with reflection on direct and lived
experience. In Portraiture, the researcher (Portraitist) paints a narrative portrait
of phenomena (a person, persons, experience or setting). It is by inference,
constructivist / interpretive in its philosophical underpinnings and aesthetic in its
implementation. “It shares some features of ethnography, case study and
narrative research, but is distinctive in its blending of aesthetics and empiricism
in an effort to capture the complexity, dynamics and subtlety of human
experience...” (Lawrence-Lightfoot 8 Hoffman-Davis, 1997, p. xv). Portraiture
along with Free Phantasy Variation as described by Moustakas (1990), Kenny
(1989) and Van Vuuren (2004) offers a contemporary interpretation of
Phenomenology and each approach utilizes aesthetic processes to arrive at
emergent themes and essences. In this way, Portraiture can also be described

as an “Arts-based research” method (Austin 8 Forinash, 2005; Neilsen, 2004).

44

Scholarly inquiry asks the question: “Why this approach and not another?
Is Portraiture the ‘best’ path of inquiry? I will begin my discussion of
methodology with a rationale for my choice of approach.

My choice was based on a number of factors. First, Portraiture was
originally conceived and designed as a gestalt of Arts and Social Sciences
research (Lawrence-Lightfoot 8 Hoffman-Davis, p. 8). Because my research
question involves human relationships, I sought out approaches that were
specifically designed to illuminate relationships. Portraiture offered the potential
of going to the heart of my question through an aesthetic process. From my
perspective, it was important to me to have ‘resonance’ and to choose the
approach that most completely matched my intention. In this way, I feel that I
have engaged the methodological selection process with integrity.

Second, Lawrence-Lightfoot states,

It is an intentionally generous and eclectic process that
begins by searching for what is good and healthy and assumes that
the expressions of goodness will always be laced with
imperfections. The researcher who asks first ‘what is good here?’
is likely to absorb a very different reality than the one who is on a
mission to discover the sources of failure. (pg 9)

As previously mentioned, I was interested in understanding the characteristics of
positive mentoring relationships with a focus toward what makes good mentors
good. This explicit attention to ‘goodness’ inherent in the Portraiture process felt
resonant with my intention.

Third, Portraiture pays explicit attention to Voice: through creating the

portraits, I am able to include the voices of all of the research participants

45

including the Portraitist. Kenny (in Wheeler, 2005) notes that voice plays an
important role in narrative inquiry (pg. 421) and further points out that ‘voice’
serves as an interpretive tool in the sense that it is the storyteller who chooses
what to include and what to leave out of a story. How might someone else
interpret the story, and how might the story be different if told by a different
person? English (2000) critiques that Portraiture is an approach that only
illuminates the perspective or the ‘voice’ of the researcher with any reliability. It
must be said that English seems to approach his critique from the positivist point
of view, insists upon the pursuit of absolute truth (positivism) and does not
acknowledge with any scholarly depth the ‘ways of knowing’ and inherent
interpretative processes that are at the root of both artistic endeavor and
constructive empiricism. I discuss Arts-based ways of knowing later in this
chapter. Voice is an important feature of qualitative research in general (Denzin
8 Lincoln, 2000) and feminist-informed research (Merrill in Hadley, 2006; Olesen
in Lincoln 8 Denzin, 2000; Wheeler in Hadley, 2006;) in particular and again is
resonant with my world-view and values as a feminist-informed music therapist
and researcher.

I also chose this approach because of its very direct link to the Arts,
believing that being involved in music-centered relationships places us in the
realm of the aesthetic in our dealings- whether aesthetics explicitly or implicitly
informs our relationships. As music therapists, we bring music and music-
informed ways of being into our relationships with others (Austin 8 Forinash in

Wheeler, 2005 year, p. 458). This assumption is a fundamental part of my belief

46

structure; therefore, I naturally favor aesthetic or aesthetically informed cultures
of inquiry. This ‘direct-link’ to the Arts offers music therapist researchers a way of
exploring direct experience that remains true to the aesthetic worldview and
resonates with our identities as artists. It is paradoxical that (in the United States
at least) the art of music and the art of being an arts-based therapist are often
circumvented in both education and clinical practice in favor of the behavioral

and biomedical worldviews. Indeed, arts-based research is underrepresented in
the music therapy literature (Austin 8 Forinash in Wheeler 2005 pg. 460).

Finally, I chose Portraiture because as a phenomenological approach, it
uses aesthetic processes (the creation of narratives) to move into the
experiences of the participants rather than to generalize outwards. Austin and
Forinash (2005) create a distinction between arts-informed research and other
forms of research including phenomenology. They point out that the creative
process itself is an inquiry into phenomena (p. 458) and one that causes the
researcher to explore different perspectives while seeking to understand the
whole of phenomena as it is experienced by the participants or ‘actors.’ “ A thing
is factually the same from whatever point of view you see it, but seeing it from
different points of view will illuminate the meaning of the forms and lines you
have been looking at” (Nicolaides, 1941, p. 130). By distancing, generalizing and
abstracting ‘too much’, the personal is obviated and something essential is lost
(Cole, 2004, p. 15-16).

Paradoxically, as in Arts performances, potentially universal themes do

emerge and the reader apprehends them at conscious and unconscious levels

47

and recognizes and identifies with certain aspects of the stories of others. In this
way, Arts performance can be self-instructive, self-illuminating, and a source of
knowledge and meaning-making. I make sense of this feature by distinguishing
between the ‘generalization’ born of a positivist worldview that abstracts and
moves outward to implications for an understanding of ‘truth’, and the sense of
archetypal themes that invite the reader deeper inside phenomena to self-
determine what is meaningful to them. This is a feature that Portraiture shares
with Hermeneutic Inquiry and Auto-ethnography, and that is the inclusion of the
reader in the research paradigm. Hoffman-Davis (1997) year) writes,

At the heart of the aesthetic experience —a primary condition- is a
conversation between two active meaning-makers, the producer and the
perceiver of a work of art. This conversation results in a co-construction of
meaning in which both parties play pivotal roles. Through internal symbols or
representations that are the vehicles of thought, the producer of art constructs a
worldview. Through external symbols or representations- embodied in the work
of art— the artist shares a worldview...since each individual’s understanding is
uniquely constructed, the meaning of a work of art is negotiated and renegotiated

repeatedly and variously as new perceivers encounter it. (p. 29-30).

Portraiture- Processes
In chapter 2 of this document, I introduce the central experience that
grounds my research question: being alternately effective and ineffective as a

supervisor. In the introductory chapter to her book (co-authored with Jessica

48

Hoffman—Davis), “The Art and Science of Portraiture,” Sarah Lawrence Lightfoot
tells the story of a ‘central experience' that precipitated the development of this
method (pg. 4). Later in the work, she describes other ‘central experiences’ that
stimulated questions and ultimately led to her award-winning3 works in
Portraiture: The Good High School: Portraits of Character and Culture ( 1983),
Balm in Gilead: Journey of a Healer ( 1988), and I’ve known Rivers: Lives of loss
and liberation (1994). Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis treat the ‘question
development phase’ of the Portraiture process indirectly other than to reflect that
the intention to explore a part of human phenomenon is based in their personal
experiences and accompanied by an intention for illuminating ‘goodness’.

As I reflect on my research processes both past and present, I understand
that the formation of research questions is often treated as tacit. Less emphasis
is placed on that generative process. All research questions in a sense have
their origins in phenomenological processes. They arrive from reflections on
real-life, direct experience. As our questions begin to form into expression, they
may then diverge through the various worldviews of the individual researcher.
For me, this process of arriving upon a question from within direct experience is
rooted in my identity as an artist. Austin and Forinash (2005, p. 458) also
engage this idea of the research question itself emerging from the artist’s
process or impulse. While my questions about mentoring are not literally
connected to musicking, my natural impulse as an artist is to re-work and re-

interpret life experiences through artistic and creative replication. Moustakas

 

3 Lawrence Lightfoot was awarded the Outstanding Book Award from the American Educational
Research Association for The Good High School and the Christopher Award for Balm in Gilead.
49

(1990) describes another process through which research questions arrive upon
the researcher:
The question grows out of an intense interest in a particular problem or
theme. The researcher’s excitement and curiosity inspire the search;
associations multiply as personal experiences bring the core of the
problem into focus. As the fullness of the theme emerges, strands and
tangents of it may complicate an articulation of a manageable and specific
question. Yet, this process of allowing all aspects to come into awareness
is essential to the eventual formulation of a clear question. (p. 43)
Selecting the Participants
I began work on this project in 2001. l consulted a former MSU professor
of music who was acknowledged as being proficient in qualitative research. She
assisted my understanding of the ways in which I could (and should) delimit my
focus, suggesting that a broad portrait of mentoring in music therapy that
highlighted conditions, qualities and essences was appropriate considering the
dearth of material on this subject within the field. I began to experiment with
language to describe my research questions through reflective processes and
‘test-flew’ various versions of my proposal in the many research classes I took
during the academic portion of my doctoral studies. During this development
time in 2002 I traveled to Germany to take part in the Fourth Symposium of
Qualitative Research in Music Therapy sponsored by the University of the Arts in
Berlin. While at the symposium, I had the opportunity to discuss my research
questions and my interest in narrative methods with my colleagues there. During
personal time, a few individuals approached me informally to ask questions about

my research. There seemed to be interest in it, and I discovered that many of

these very fine therapists, had mentors in their lives and they seemed keen to
50

talk about their experiences as protégés. Some of the stories were inspiring in
their positivity and others were troubling in the depth of pain and enmeshment
they represented. Two men in particular indicated that they would be interested
in being a part of this study. One of these men is my participant ‘Tomas.’ The
other man had a mentor who was a woman. Initially, I pursued an interview with
them both, but the timing was never right for the trip to London to interview the
second man and his mentor, and after a series of emails, I came to the
realization that this relationship was really more of a long-term friendship that
emerged after the man was a student music therapist. They actually did not use
the term ‘mentor’ and the woman herself never acknowledged her role as a
mentor. I did not pursue this dyad any further.

Initially, I had wished for three dyad participants for this study. I was
interested in two pairs of the same gender (M-M; F-F), and then I wished for a
third, mixed gender dyad (M-F or F-M). I contacted four training centers that I
knew were well-known for graduate education in music therapy: The Nordoff-
Robbins center for music therapy at NYU in New York, The Nordoff-Robbins
Center for Music Therapy in London, Temple University in the United States, and
Aalborg University in Denmark. My participant criteria at this stage was:

- The mentor-protege relationship should be of long duration i.e.
greater than ten years

- Both mentor and protégé should be long standing and contributing
members of the music therapy profession as demonstrated by both

mentor and protégé having made contributions to the profession

51

through teaching, presenting, publishing, or through their

contribution to clinical work.
I was particularly looking for the mixed gender condition. I received six
responses to my inquiry. I will discuss some of the artifacts from these potential
candidates in my section on ‘negative space’ as I think that some of the issues
that came up during the candidacy phase are quite significant to the results of
this study. For now, I will say that none of the dyads suggested to me were of
mixed gender. l reluctantly let go of this desire and decided that the absence of
this condition was part of the phenomena to be included in my results.

Then, there were the stories from people who seemed to wish to unburden
themselves of the baggage of toxic relationships with former mentors. I
understood at that time that I really felt a foreboding about these stories and
realized that l was more interested in understanding what made for ‘good’ or
‘positive’ mentoring relationships- rather than their opposite. My selection criteria
narrowed further to include the condition of ‘Positive mentoring relationship of
long duration i.e. greater than ten years”.

I chose my second dyad, Lisa and Canon, because one of my own
mentors (Lisa) offered to support my research by suggesting herself and Canon
as potential participants. This dyad met the criteria for the female-female
condition and also met each of the other criteria. After a supervision with my
committee chair, I decided to formally select Tomas and Jan and Canon and Lisa

as the two mentoring dyads to be included in this study.

52

Institutional review was initiated and the study received the approval of the

Human Research Protection Program on 6 December 2002 (see appendix).

The Interviews

I conducted interviews in Norway, Denmark and California, USA.
Participants were given the choice of whether they would like to be interviewed
individually or together. Tomas and Jan were unable to be interviewed at the
same time so their interviews took place individually. Tomas’s interview took
place over three days, in two airports concluding in a restaurant in Aalborg,
Denmark. Jan’s interview also took place in Aalborg in 90 minutes on a layover
between Bangkok and Oslo, Nonivay. Lisa and Canon chose to be interviewed
together. This interview lasted for close to three hours and was very
collaborative. l complied a list of research questions (appendix 2) that served as
guidelines for an open discussion of the relationships. They were open-ended
questions designed to elicit a story. This interviewing style is an example of a
semi-structured interview (Kvale) (descriptors of this kind of interview?) I wanted
to be able to respond to emergent topics as they came up, asking for clarification
and seeking deeper responses. I wanted to be able to take advantage of the
openness inherent in the semi-structured interview, I did not wish to restrict or
program the content by providing too much structure (McIntyre, 2004). The first
question for all three interviews was “Would you please tell me the story of how
you and _ became acquainted” Each interview was recorded and
subsequently transcribed.

Epoche
53

Qualitative research processes are never linear, though in writing about them, a
researcher is challenged to find ways to discuss aspects of the research that may
not be linear at all, yet appear to be so based solely on the fact that reading Is, by
definition, linear. So it is difficult to choose exactly the right place to discuss
research process phenomena that, in actuality, took place over time and
spanned multiple research phases and tasks. One such phenomenon is the
Epoche (Moustakas, 1994, p. 26, 33-34), reflective distancing and intentional
naiveté that began during the interview stage and has continued during the time
that has passed between the interviews and the analysis (creation of portraits) of
the interviews. Epoche is a Greek word meaning to refrain from judgment. “It
requires a new way of looking at things... the everyday understandings,
judgments and knowings are set aside and phenomena are revisited freshly,
naively, in a wide open sense” (p. 33). Schwandt (2001) expands on the
traditional view of the epoche and describes it as a kind of ‘bracketing’ process
that involves “suspending what Husserl calls the ‘natural attitude’, which is the
everyday assumptions of the independent existence of what is perceived and
thought about” (p.192). In this particular study, one set of early research
questions strove to connect the emergent themes from my interviews with Kathy
Kram’s seminal work on mentoring and the stages of the mentoring relationship
that are proposed in that work. There is a danger, I think, when the intention is,
as mine was, to present a broad description of phenomena, to be overly
influenced by the literature. The researcher is in danger of consciously or
unconsciously skewing the questions to elicit the answers to the questions they

54

are seeking- in addition to gathering a large amount of ‘other' information. On
the other hand, relevant literature grounds a study and gives-it shape. It is a
dilemma. In my own words, In order to engage a qualitative process with
integrity, I am required to adopt, as much as is possible, an open stance where
my preconceptions are acknowledged but then suspended and where l adopt
what I call a ‘freshness of perception’ where the things that I see and hear and
sense and feel about an interview or an essential quality is as if for the first time.
Throughout the process of this inquiry, I engaged art making, music making and
poetry writing to enable the silencing of my cognitive processes ‘about’ these
phenomena and in effort of allowing new and fresh reflections to arrive upon my
conscious awareness. In my poetic reflections found later in this work, I try to
express all that I become aware of in my direct environment preceding and
during the interviews. In this way I try to understand and frame all of my
perceptions as both background and substance of the phenomenological
reduction process. I am reminded of a particular line from T.S. Eliot’s poem Little
Gidding (No. 4 of Four Quartets), “We shall not cease from exploration. And the
end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for
the first time.” (1942 Retrieved from
www.tristan.icom43.net/quartets/gidding.html).

The practice of Epoche was particularly active during the interviews as the
individuals I interviewed were people I revered. In the case of Tomas and Jan, I
was very aware of their status and stature within the European music therapy

community, and my biggest task was to actually engage my questions and

55

discuss their experiences. I had to transcend my feelings of insignificance in
order to challenge them to respond to my questions with depth. In my reflective
journal, I wrote that I felt as though I were awaiting an audience with the King. In
the case of Lisa and Canon, (as mentioned in framing the terrain p. 76) l was
challenged to suspend to a certain extent my knowledge of Lisa from our
previous relationship and to see her through the eyes of her protégé, Canon.
This suspension is not to be confused with the concept of eliminating bias or
variables; rather it is an open acknowledgment of these influences. There was
much about my own experience with Lisa that informed my understanding of their
story, but in the Epoche process, I strove to not impose my own experience onto
this dyad in either the interview or in the creation of the portraits. The time
between the interviews, the initial reflections and the creation of the portraits

(approximately two years) served to strengthen the Epoche.

The Reflexive Journal

As suggested by Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis (1997), I took
extensive field notes in a reflective journal or ‘impressionistic record’ (p. 188)
before and after the interviews, making notes of my overall impressions, images
and resounding metaphors. These notes are included in the performance of the
portraits both explicitly and in an implied way through their contributions to the

many images and metaphors used in the creation of the portraits in part three.

56

Essential Qualities and Emergent Themes

Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis describe an empirical process
through which essential qualities are arrived at through the creative process of
creating portraits. This is described as a cyclic process of description,
interpretation, analysis, and synthesis they call iterative cycles (p. 188). As
previously mentioned, the portraitist begins by creating a contextual framework
that includes her own point of view or ‘voice’, making explicit the researcher’s
individual ‘template’. Again, rather than serving to eliminate bias, in Portraiture,
voice is seen as a frame within which the portrait is created and then further
perceived and interpreted by the reader. The authors insist that it is critical that
the Portraitist examine the framework prior to entering the field so that her
intellectual framework may be clear to take in subtleties (p. 188).

Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis and others emphasize the
flexibility that enjoins the process of thematic development (p. 188). Again,
Lawrence-Lightfoot refers to this creative process as occurring through ‘iterative
cycles’ and this terminology resonates with me in the sense that the phrase
describes both the cyclic form and the aesthetic process of finding language to
describe the researchers perceptions and impressions. Glaser and Strauss
(1967) also describe a flexible and dialectic process that involves the researcher
beginning to collect data while apprehending and listening for emergent themes.
This dialectic, Lawrence-Lightfoot notes, mirrors the dynamic quality of human

interaction- therefore is particularly suited to document social processes (p. 189).

57

Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis move further into the iterative
process and describe a stage that they describe as one of ‘reflective scrutiny’.
This process is less action-oriented and more “ruminative” and thus begins the
process of searching for regularities and patterns. These patterns then become
categories into which data groups are sorted. They note that these processes
are not always conscious ones. I describe such an experience later in this
document in the section I title methodological sidebar.

The process of identifying emerging themes is not limited to regularities or
convergences of thematic material. Differences and divergences play an
important role and constitute what can highlight context, individual differences
and gender differences. Included in these differences and divergences is a
category I call ‘negative space’- that which is conspicuous by its absence and
that which can throw the object of a portrait into relief. In this study, the absence
of mixed gender dyads, and the absence of active musicking in the relationships
between mentors and protégés feel curious and conspicuous so they are
included in this way. The differences and dissonances are also important from a
critical and feminist point of view. Tension, discordant differences are used in
these research paradigms to convey the richness and complexities inherent in
human relationships.

Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis describe five levels of synthesis in
their description of the Portraiture process of construction of emergent themes (p.
193). These are: looking or listening for repetitive refrains that appear

persistently and that form some expression of commonly held views; listening for

58

resonant metaphors, symbolic expressions or images that reveal the way the
actors experience their reality; listening for themes expressed through cultural or
institutional rituals; triangulation of threads converging from a number of sources;
and themes or patterns experienced as contrasting or dissonant.

Toward the conclusion of my empirical process of creating portraits, I re-
engaged the research participants as collaborators in this study through a
process that can be likened to ‘member-checking’. Member checking as
described by Janesick (2000) is one way to strengthen the credibility of a
qualitative inquiry. Three out of the four research participants from this study
read and reviewed their portraits and analyses for truthfulness and accuracy. I
am very fortunate to have had such accomplished researchers as participants,
and their additions and contributions through the member-checking process are

embedded throughout this document.

Epistemology

Epistemology can be loosely described as the study of the process by
which phenomena is understood or knowledge is apprehended or formed. It is a
branch of philosophy that is concerned with the ‘how’ of knowing. It is important
for the qualitative researcher to explore and be able to articulate the
philosophical roots of meaning, interpretation and understanding as they pertain
to their questions and methodologies. Indeed, a well-articulated epistemological
grounding is one of the criteria suggested for “good” qualitative research in social
sciences (Denzin 8 Lincoln, 2000) and in music therapy (Stige, 2002). It is not

the intention of this study to enter into a lengthy treatment of epistemology except
59

to address the theories of knowledge and meaning that apply and support this
present research. -

I feel that there are two epistemological traditions that are relevant to
Portraiture in general and to this research in particular— lnterpretivism and
Philosophical Hermeneutics (Schwandt, 2000). lnterpretivist philosophies are
concerned with meaning in human experience (as opposed to the object of
positivist/scientific endeavor which is to establish causal relations). Most
interpretive paradigms seek to get inside human experience by the use of various
techniques such as empathic and reflexive practices (Schwandt in Denzin and
Lincoln 2000, p. 192). My own research of 1997 Rise Up Singing: A model for
consciousness through the therapist’s reflections on the improvised music of
persons with end stage dementia (Merrill, 1997) is an example of
phenomenological lnterpretivism from within the music therapy literature.
Hoffman-Davis casts Portraiture in the interpretive light (p. 29-31). She is
speaking purely to arts interpretation when she describes interpretive processes
as involving “recognizing, sorting, and organizing perceptions toward a cohesive
construction of understanding” (p. 30). She further states that the apprehension
of essences and qualities (inherent in all phenomenological endeavor) is a
discerning function that is necessary for understanding and links this function
explicitly with artistic activity that she describes as an active search for
connections and coherence.

Philosophical Hermeneutics is dominated by the work of Hans-Georg
Gadamer. Gadamer’s perspective is important for music therapists interested in

60

interpretation as he develops Kant’s ideas of subjective and intersubjective
knowing through the arts. He also suggests that there is an authenticity and
genuineness to the aesthetic experience that renders artistic experiences
themselves as ‘truth’. Furthermore, Gadamer states that there is no more
genuine experience of reality than that which is experienced in the doing and
perceiving of art (Gadamer, 1994, p. 83-84). Kenny, Jahn-Langenberg and
Loewy (in Wheeler, 2005) acknowledge the role Gadamer plays in informing
interpretation for music therapist researchers, “Gadamer’s interest in aesthetics
gives him privilege in the research of artists and creative arts therapists (p. 338).”

It is my belief that arts-based knowing is multi-modal and combines the
sensorial/perceptual with the praxial resulting finally in a cognitive (one might say
imaginal) awareness. Thus, it is in the participation and engagement with art that
knowledge is constructed. It is not an exclusively cognitive pursuit. In several
places in this work, I describe and reference personal experiences with abstract
sculpture and the work of Robert Davidson and again with the abstract realism
paintings and sculptures of Georgia O’Keefe. Although I could not articulate why,
I felt that participating in these exhibitions as a perceiver was informing my own
mentoring research processes. I am aware now at this distance, that these
abstract statements were elaborating qualities (much like the phenomenologist
endeavor) of the ‘object’: line, color, movement and media and that I was
simultaneously drawn in and also out as further abstractions were expanded
upon. I was arrested by the sense that some insight was in the process of

forming. Both the artistic endeavor of these artists and my own aesthetic

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endeavor of perception and interpretation were/are generating knowledge- and l
co-create with them both, only in a way that is different contextually. This is, for
me, an embodied Epistemology

In her extraordinary chapter Aesthetics and Knowing: Ephemeral

principles for a groundless theory (in Cole, Neilsen, Knowles, and Luciani, 2004)

Neilsen proposes that knowing is itself an art form. She proposes the following

features of arts-based knowing:

1. That inquiry is liminal space- that inquiry is only intending knowledge- that a
given individual’s understanding of anything is always provisional, ephemeral
and idiosyncratic to that person as distinguished from another’s
understanding (may be different from my understanding). Further that
knowing has no reality outside of the “embodied, insprited actors whose
conversation makes the story move, give it life.”

2. That arts-based inquiry is whole, alive and embodied.

The usual split between ontology and epistemology, or between
mind and body, may not apply. Our fully-present, sense making
selves embody and in/form the art: we are the poem, the painting,
whether or not we hold the pen or the brush... We are walking
theory, and this way of being and knowing asks a response-ability,
invites us to develop all our possibilities-not only to the cognitive,
but all aspects of our sense-making selves. To be an arts-informed
researcher-or to be arbiter, supporter, audience, mentor or critic-
we must each engage in the music, the dance, the flow of ink on
paper, the arc of the hand on clay.

3. Knowing is subject to the demands and the politics of form. That knowing is

marked by sign systems at play at a particular time and in a particular place

and culture. Arts-based knowledge is created ‘inside a story we know others

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share’ but the artist-researcher informs this story in ways or through
perspectives that others are not prone to seeing.

4. Inquiry and knowing are expansive, difficult, passionate, catalytic. Aesthetics
“opens us up and opens up a space that interrupts the ordinary. It forces
changes, ours and others.”

5. Knowing and inquiry are forms of witness. “They speak to the ethics of how
we are in the world.” The arts engage us in knowing that is generative not
acquisitive. (p. 46-48)

In the case of this research, knowledge (the essential qualities of the
mentoring relationships studied) is constructed through the creative act of
composing Portraits of two long-standing and positive mentoring relationships;
through recognizing and exploring convergences, patterns and dissonances.
Multiple aesthetic perspectives inform the subsequent reflection and analysis as
they are embedded within the Portraits and new language and references are
made to musical and artistic phenomena as a further means of triangulation that

remains true to arts-based ways of knowing.

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Segue:
From Epistemology to Methodology

In all qualitative research, it is the researcher’s responsibility to re-
conceptualize methodology through their own understanding and world-view.
This is yet another example of the centrality of interpretation within qualitative
research in general (Denzin and Lincoln, 2000, p. 21) and within Portraiture in
particular (Lawrence-Lightfoot 8 Hoffman-Davis, 1997, p. 30). There are ways in
which I interpret and make meaning of Portraiture that are unique to me as a
musical and artistic being.

My interpretation of Portraiture was inspired by two profound experiences
of the abstract art of two very different artists: First Nation’s artist and sculptor
Robert Davidson and American artist Georgia O’Keefe. Being with their
installations, I experienced a profound gestalt or wholeness while taking in the
particular detail of their subjects that they chose to magnify, intensify or sharpen.
As I progressed through the exhibitions of their work, at different times and three
years apart, I found the same themes layered and explored through different
vantage points, techniques and media and immediately felt a persistent sense of
relevance to my study. Over time, I came to understand that the relevance that I
perceived in the moment was actually working upon my consciousness as a
researcher, informing my choice of aesthetic representation. In the moment, the
images worked upon me in such a way that I felt as if new neurological pathways
were being created in my brain that I was unable to actually articulate fully in

language. Time, and epoche have helped clarify the meaning of these
64

experiences, and scholarship has helped ground them in qualitative research
theory.

Similarly, my interpretation of Portraiture can be likened to witnessing a
painter or sculptor working, layering shape, color and texture. The reader
becomes a part of the interpretive process by being present as the Portrait is
being constructed- rather than as a passive viewer of a completed work.
Portraiture is a method that is broad and aesthetic enough to offer that kind of
flexibility.

As mentioned in the introduction to this work, I conceived and created an
organizing structure for these Portraits of two mentoring relationships to be
experienced as layered over time through thematic presentation. Like viewing
the same phenomenon through different facets of a crystal, different ‘views’ of
the mentoring relationships will be presented through the thematic lens of the
emergent themes or qualities. The centrality of interpretation in qualitative
research while offering tremendous intellectual flexibility also brings with it the
responsibility of trustworthiness and rigor. Thus, I offer multiple perspectives on
the phenomena that are the relationships between Lisa and Canon, and Tomas
and Jan. These thematic viewpoints also serve as a means of triangulation as
described by Lincoln and Denzin (2000), “The combination of multiple
methodological practices, empirical materials, perspective and observers in a
single study is best understood then, as a strategy that adds rigor, breadth,
complexity, richness, and depth to any inquiry.“ (p. 5) I feel that it is critical for

the reader to follow the iterative cycles through the dialogues between Portraitist

65

and dyads so as to experience the emerging themes, qualities and metaphors for
onesefi.

In presenting the Portraits in this way, I integrate presentation with
interpretation and analysis- preserving the aesthetic whole of each thematic lens.
I further explore the themes from greater distance through an ‘interpretive essay’
that concludes the presentation of findings.

As an artist musician, I understand the world and experience my personal
sociology as music. My interpersonal relations are characterized by an
awareness of resonances, dissonances, consonances, reverberations, sounds
and silences and improvisations. As this is my experience of the world, I offer
this music-informed language to the literature on Portraiture, thereby weaving
music as a paradigm for meaning making into this method. I do not use these
terms gratuitously. The musicality of being emerged as phenomena from within
the discourse of the research participants, and is therefore germane and integral

to this study.

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Part 3.
EXHIBITION
Preface to the Performance of Findings

As previously mentioned, the nature of “writing about’ phenomena must, to
a certain degree, be undertaken in a linear fashion. Thus, my description of the
Portraiture process as I understand it, was presented In a linear way earlier in
this document. My interpretation of this method (previously articulated in Segue:
From Epistemology to Methodology), offer the emergent themes, metaphors and
images through iterative and ruminative sequences where dialogue is integrated
with reflection. Conceived of and presented in this way, the Portraits themselves
are not linear. Though they are organized to loosely follow the stages of the
mentoring relationship as described by Kram (1983), excerpts are grouped
together thematically (also referred to by Lawrence Lightfoot and Hoffman Davis
as ‘scaffolding,’ p, 259) rather than chronologically, and analysis and
interpretation are integrated into the Portraits to preserve the aesthetic integrity of
the work. While engaged in the processes of this research- the observation,
reflection, and the heightened awareness of themes and metaphors as they
arrived upon me through the creative activity of writing, I experienced the
Portraits as a gestalt, rather than a step-by-step linear process; therefore, these
findings are presented in a synthesized manner- as an artist might blend several

colors to create depth and perspective.

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In this study I introduce new, music-informed language to the Portraiture
method that is consistent with that process but is~ born from within these data. A
representation of my unique methodological interpretations follows:

Framing the Terrain- I use this terminology as opposed to Lawrence-
Lightfoot’s word “frame” so as to include and allude to the importance of place for
my participants. Location, culture and the natural world are factors for these
dyads and my use of this term explicitly includes these features. Framing the
Terrain also explicitly introduces the reader to the voice and perspective of the
researcher and positions her within the context, not outside of it. The reader will
discover foreshadowing of the essential themes within this terrain.

Consonances- The term ‘consonance’ is used in this context as
synonymous with Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis” use of the word
‘convergences’. Both of these words are used to indicate areas of common or
shared experience: central themes that both dyads shared. I use this music-
informed term because of the centrality of the primary theme of Resonance.
Consonance is a necessary element of resonance.

Dissonances- Used in this work refers to ways in which members of the
dyad diverge from one another and from the other dyad. Again related to the
primary theme of resonance, dissonance is the equal and opposite phenomenon
of consonance.

Reverberation- I use this word as an area heading to indicate what
Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis call ‘repetitive refrains’. In this chapter, I

clearly summarize the repetitive themes, which by being held within the

68

resonating chamber of the iterative cycles of these research processes, have
become more pronounced and persistent. .

Negative Space- I alluded to this term previously, and use it to indicate
that which is behind (perhaps in shadow) and conspicuous by its absence. The
negative space, through its necessary presence, provides perspective that allows

the subject of the portrait to become more prominent.

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CHAPTER 5
Framing the Terrain

I. Norwegian Wood

There is a stand of tall trees just beyond this window that nearly but not
quite obscures my view of the fiord. Through the trunks there is enough space
and light so that I am able to see the austere beauty of these grand and rugged
mountains and the finger- projections of the North Sea that penetrate their bases.
Oddly, the trees still have leaves even though there is snow. The days are
shortened and the air is very cold. I can see the narrow and winding roads that
traverse the precipitous but undulating edge of land. lndescribably green
meadows are precariously sandwiched between mountain and sea. Small
farmhouses and barns dot the horizon along the fjord. It is early morning and
mist hangs in the coves and trees and along the ridges of the icy mountains. It is
eternally still. I pull my heavy wool sweater a little closer around my chest and
step through the door into the early Norwegian morning. The words to an old
Beatle’s tune “Isn’t it good, Norwegian wood” circles in refrains in my mind’s ear.
This was the first of the Beatle’s tunes that captured my imagination- even as an
11 year old, I imagined something clean and fragrant about Norwegian wood-
there was a sense of warmth and protection from harsh elements that caused me
to construct a paradoxical sensory image of icy/warmth. And I find now so many
years later, with my feet finally on Norwegian soil, that this sense is even more

pronounced. Perhaps it is the quiet warmth of welcome I have received, or

70

maybe the earthiness of the students and professors at this University. But I
actually think that it is a more aesthetic impression- fuelled by the images of
candles in windows lighting the darkness with warm, golden glow. I imagine that
if one lived here, one could not really escape the sense of the temporal and
impermanent in the transformation of glaciers and the patience engendered by
both the remoteness and the long winters. Yet, there is a quickness of mind in
the face of a slowness and reflexivity of speech that stands out to me, deepening
my sense of paradox.

‘Tomas’ (my first participant) came to this remote part of Nonivay in 1983
on a government grant funded project that sought to develop and deepen a
community’s experience with persons with disabilities. While on my walk, I
become aware of how important it is to have come to Nonrvay for this interview, I
sense that there is significance in the lay of the land, in the climate and in the
remoteness, the clarity in this geography is like the transparency and absence of
ego of my participants- these features have somehow helped to shape this
relationship. From my field notes:

“It feels important for me somehow- well to this research, to write
something about the austere beauty of Norway. . . There is some connection, I
feet, between the land, culture and the practice of music therapy and I believe I
will sense this also in the relationship between ‘Tomas’ and ‘Jan’. So what is this

connection to land? I don’t know, but I feel it.”

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ll. Sanctuary
Squamish, BC, Canada- Summer 2004

The elder women dance at the Pow Wow. They move with soft small
steps, their feet barely leaving the earth- they are rooted. The young women twirl
and swirl their blankets like wings. But the elder women take the center of the
circle, and they dance so softly- caressing the earth with their feet. It is as if they
are feather light and they move- first a gentle toe then the whole foot rocking
down rhythmically, settling gently onto the dirt of the rodeo ring. One elder
woman moves out of the inner circle and beckons to a young girl- maybe 13
years of age. She wraps the girl in a blanket and dances with her in the spaces
between the two circles in a place all their own. She holds the girl beneath the
same blanket that she is in. I understand that this is a ceremony, an initiation, a
coming of age for the young girl. Once their dance around the dusty arena is
complete, the elder woman returns to her own circle leaving the younger with the
new blanket. The girl begins to dance with lightness and energy- like a butterfly,
swirling her blanket, showing her fancy footwork. All eyes are on her. She is
seen as a woman now. The drums shake the earth beneath my feet and the

voices of the singers rise even higher in pitch....and then, they stop.

We bought coffees and bagels and breakfasted on the beach watching the
surfers play with dolphins. It is December in Santa Barbara. I have the unique
opportunity to experience one of my own mentors through the lens of a different

mentoring relationship. We will meet after lunch for our interview, but now I am

72

alone in Lisa’s studio apartment. She calls it her ‘little place’ and it is that. There
is a sweet homey-ness to this space that is typical of Lisa who even in her very
beautiful condo in Vancouver seems to create sanctuary wherever she lives.
When one is in her space, one has the sense of being deep inside some safe
spot— with the world far away and on the outside. The walls feel thick and
impermeable and while I am here, there is serenity. This energy comes from
Lisa herself. I am aware of that because for several years I house-sat her condo
and cared for her little birds. It did not take long for my more frenetic and ‘busy’
energy to take over the space. Then she would return and re-calibrate her home
with her own spaciousness and clarity.

Lisa lives simply, though her life has never been simple. There is a
minimum of furniture here: two wicker chairs- one of them is painted blue. Her
bed is covered with an intricate French floral cotton print coverlet. Her small
kitchen is immaculate and there is a bare minimum of necessary items in her
fridge. Lisa does not carry extra baggage. She negotiates many worlds and
many contexts that are not simple- her world in Haida-Gwaii, the doctoral
students from all over North America in First Nations education and music
therapy, the international research, the editorship of an international journal, the
academic dean-ship. These are not simple functions yet the inner sanctum, the
heart of Lisa is spacious, simple, serene and it holds sanctuary for me. Always
has.

Being here, preparing to bear witness to the story of Lisa’s mentoring
relationship with Canon, l purge myself of my own experiences with her in order

73

to be as neutral and open as I possibly can be to their story. I remember the time
when my brothers and l reverently leafed through our mother’s diary after her
death. We learned things there about a life, an inner life we had not been able to
share-simply because of our closeness. I remember this and begin the process
of opening my inner eyes and ears to possibly experience something about Lisa
that will surprise me or catch me off guard, something that will silence the voice
that says “I know you”.

I reflect that I am aware of an important quality of her mentoring of me and
that is her way of ‘letting me in to share the space’. I realize that one of the ways
I learn is by ‘being with.’ It is warm and the sun is shining through the windows. I
open the door to let the air in. There is a large Buddha on a simple white table
outside her front door framed by honeysuckle as it drapes around the latticework
of her balcony. There is a gentle breeze and off in the distance, I can hear the
air moving through a set of wind-chimes. Another awareness comes to me in
this space and that is a particular quality of ‘letting go.’ Only a few items that I
am familiar with from her old home have come here to this one. Lisa can let go
of attachments. I think that she has re-invented herself on the superficial level
many, many times over the years. Her first major book resonated with themes of
death-rebirth and so does she. Impermanence is a theme I recognize in her life,
and in her mentoring of me- but it is paradoxical. She can hold on and endure
with ferocity, and she can let go gracefully. Being with her- I have learned this. It

is hard to have any objectivity when it comes to Lisa- so I will use my knowledge

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of her to understand her mentoring style with Canon...and I will learn new things

too.

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Priming the Canvas

The ‘canvas’ or the surface from which a work of art emerges can be seen
as a metaphor for a kind of tabla rasa or new, undeclared state of openness on
which the relation (or in this case, on which an image of a relation) can be
created. In ‘Framing the Terrain’ we are introduced to Jan and Tomas’ physical
and cultural environment and some of the outstanding features of that
environment that frame their experience together. Similarly the reader is
introduced to Canon and Lisa through the eyes and experience of the researcher
and the theme of ‘sanctuary’ is unearthed through that iterative cycle.
Furthermore, this theme is substantiated by the images generated by a free-form
art experience with the two women (see fig. 1, 2 and 3 pgs.108, 111, 8112).
(Portraitist’s Note: I invited Lisa and Canon to drawing as a means of
transitioning from the social climate of meeting, greeting and catching up to the
climate of the interview. The images that emerged in their art became so central
to their experiences that I felt compelled to include them in their Portrait. That
being said, the Portraits are not presented chronologically but with the themes as
the primary organizing principle, therefore, commentary on the art is included in
the iterative cycle that is most resonant with their content. I was not really in a
position to offer the same opportunity to Jan and Tomas, partly because the men
chose to be interviewed separately [due to scheduling], and because our
interviews took place in airports and restaurants.)

The ‘canvas’ is more than a frame. The canvas or working surface exerts
more significant influence on the texture and depth of the work of art. Its degree

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of porous-ness, its texture and tightness of weave influence the uptake of color
and brushstroke. I liken the canvas and its preparation to worldview and life
experiences of both the mentors and protégés in these relationships.

Both Jan and Lisa bring a particular worldview to bear upon their relationships-
‘priming their canvases’ in particular ways that support their relations with their
protégés. Both dyads in this study share elements of context and worldview,

paving the way to recognizing resonance.

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CHAPTER 6
Consonances

Resonance

METHODOLOGICAL SIDEBAR: As I was writing this chapter on Prologue
to 8 Relation- Recognizing Resonance, I experienced something I am calling a
convergence of themes. Up to this point I had identified several themes- but they
seemed quite different and I struggled with the notion that I needed to find a
connecting thread between them all. I had triangulated my themes with several
existing models. . .but still this did not feel as though it was really ‘it’. There was
no new contribution in that, and I was left with a feeling that there was something
left ‘out there’, some kind of concept that had been eluding me for years about
this: a concept that connects these stories and the art work that has been so
inspiring to me along the way. . .always, connecting with abstract art has served
to inspire me toward this research, and I did not really have a sense of why that
was. Only that there is something important to connect about these works with
my research on mentoring.

And then the moment came as l was talking to myself, “It’s as if they
actually amplify one another. . .amplify and potentiate who they already are”. I
came to see this amplification as a form of the resonance I had been writing
about, and I came to understand the reciprocity and mutual advantage of the
mentoring relationship as a unique kind of interpersonal resonance/ amplification.

The abstract artist uses amplification, definition and perspective to move
something from the objective to the subjective. O’Keefe magnifies, moves closer

78

to an object as if to see qualities inside it. Davidson deconstructs individual
elements of native forms and then intensifies those elements with pressure,
emphasis and color. Both are forms of amplification. The concept of resonance
seemed to unify everything. In this way, this meta-theme arrived upon me
through the process of creating portraits. . .as I wrote in my reflexive journal, “like
dawn breaking hot and bright-white in a convergence of what had before been
separate, disparate”. And I saw that resonance was the core theme that
reverberated throughout the phases or stages of these mentoring relationships.
This notion of art, music, dance. . .any of the Arts, really. . .effectively
bridging objective and subjective- observer and observed, creator and created
seems to me to really return to that core concept of consciousness, and I
effectively join the aesthetic philosophers- Merleu-Ponty, and Polyani and also
Buddhist scholars- Wilbur, Bateson and Watkins. And I wonder if this is
something unique that music therapists- as artists- can ‘re-leam’? A kind of
musicality of ‘being with’, An art of creating a more artful life? I wonder if one
experiences mentoring and even supervising as music- something to listen to
deeply, something to allow into perception in a unique way, to view the protege
or student as another music to be interacted with in a kind of extemporaneous
composition or improvisation; if we ‘felt into’ these relationships as we feel into

our music, how might their qualities change for us?

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Prologue to a Relation

Recognizing Resonance

The vast majority of mentoring research from the fields of business and
leadership (previously cited) really begin their mentoring inquiries once the
relationship has been formed. Kram (1983) diverges from this trend and
discusses mentor motivation. Other than this important contribution, there is little
in the literature that uncovers pre-relational factors. Lu Ann Darling (2006) is a
notable exception. In her book Discover your mentoring mosaic, a guide to
enhanced mentoring, she states that the ability to bond with a mentor is a quality
that is related to early attachments with adults from childhood (pg. 23). l was
interested in conditions or dynamics that may have pre-existed and/or
contributed to the initial ‘forming’ of the relations between Lisa and Canon and
Jan and Tomas. I made a point of asking the participants in this study to tell me

how they came to know one another.

Tomas

During my ten days in Scandinavia (both Norway and Denmark), Tomas
and I had several opportunities to speak casually about our interviews- being in
the same milieu and sharing meals, lectures and travel. On several occasions, I
scribbled notes from these casual conversations, as they were not recorded.
After our second interview in the Copenhagen airport, we continued our
conversation on the airplane and he began to reference the early days of his
association with Jan as the Prologue to the relationship. In a later tape, I

80

mistakenly refer to that time as the Prelude (a very musical term). He allows my
error to pass, but Tomas’ relationshipiand I think, in retrospect, that his term is
more correct, for Jan really centers on the written word. In her article ‘Phases of
the mentoring relationship’ (1983), Kram discusses the initial phase of the
mentoring relationship. She calls this phase “Initiation” and characterizes it as a
time when the mentor is strongly admired and respected for his or her
competence. This time is characterized by strong positive fantasies in both
directions. The mentor embodies an object for positive identification and is
viewed as someone who will support and positively influence the protege across
functions and values that the protégé experiences a degree of resonance with.
The mentor similarly experiences the prospective protégé as someone with
‘potential’, someone who is ‘coachable’. Thus, the protege becomes a fantasy
object for the transmission of the mentor’s values and perspective of the world
and the impetus for setting the relation in motion is the possibility of contributing
to the protégé’s overall success as an extension or reflection of the self (Allen
Poteet 8 Burrows, 1997).

Tomas was a young man with a strong social conscience. Tomas says
that he was deeply influenced by social reforms taking place in Europe and North
America in the 60’s and 70’s and that many of his own values reflected these
reforms.

In 1977, Tomas was 19 years old and living in Oslo. “Music therapy was
very new in Norway at that time,” he remembers. There was no training- that did
not begin until 1978. The young association for music therapy in Norway held

81

some information courses designed for the community at large every Wednesday
evening for ten weeks. So, Tomas attended that course. I asked him. what
attracted him to music therapy in the first place. “I was attracted to it and I had
problems with it,” he recalls.

I was extremely attracted to the possibility of working with people through
music. At that time it was not very articulated with me, but I had a strong
love for music and I didn’t know how to use it. And I had a strong urge to
work with children and with handicapped people.

He then explains,

At the same time, I was very critical of the development in modern
society of therapy, in a way compensating for community and relationships
and relationships among friends and family. As you know, the 70’s were
full of critical books about therapy, and I had read a couple of those and
so it was very complicated for me to choose to become a therapist when I
had read all this critical literature about the role of therapy in society. So I
was attracted to it and I was critical of it.

He continues,

And that’s why Jan became very important to me even before I spoke to
him... the first three books that were written about music therapy in
Norway were written by him. So they were the first three books I read
about music therapy and they didn’t discuss these issues directly, but
indirectly, there was enough awareness about social problems, about
society, about culture, in those books that I could think, well OK! It is
possible to become a music therapist and relate to these problems within
the discipline. You don’t need to stand outside.

Later, Tomas says, “I think if not for Jan’s books, I don’t think I would have

chosen to become a music therapist, so actually, he is important for me...it (the
relationship) actually started through his books”.

Canon

In Lisa’s bright and cheerful apartment on a sunny December afternoon,

Canon shares a similar experience. Frustrated by what she calls the “lack of
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depth” in the behavioral approach to music therapy that she experienced in her
training (1977-1981), she recalls feeling a sense of rebellion,

I’m going to have a private practice- and all my friends were laughing at
me like ‘what are you talking about? Music therapists don’t do that’ and I
said ‘they don’t do that right now, but I’m gonna work with people
differently and it’s gonna be music therapy, but NOT how we were taught.

What Canon had been taught about music therapy did not seem resonant with
her own experience of life and of her experience with music and in particular,
with her experience of being in music with people with mental health problems.
In 1982, she read Lisa’s first book and she became excited about the new
possibilities contained in that work. She then attended a presentation given at a
music therapy conference by Lisa and immediately found her resonance. This
story pours from Canon rapid-fire:

And I have to say that when I first was in school to be a music therapist-
I’m one of the dinosaurs roaming around on the earth in the late 70’d and
early 80’s and I read Lisa’s first book (identifier omitted). I instantly felt a
connection to Lisa at that point. So when I finally met her— Oh, I saw her
speak somewhere, and I just (sounds like gasping) Oh I just love this
woman, I just worship her from afar, I think what she has written just
resonates with me so much, and you know, not everybody felt that way.
But I always felt that way.
And so actually, when she came to talk to me and my business partner
(Portraitist’s note: in 1989) when we were starting our business...
(Portraitist’s note: the focus of Canon’s story now changes as she directs
her words toward Lisa herself), actually kind of knew you, she had met
you somewhere, more than I knew you, and when she said that she (Lisa)
was going to come and talk to us, I just thought...l am, like, meeting this
person that I have admired and respected and looked up to for so long- I
can’t even believe that

she would come into my house and I’m gonna get to meet her because I
felt so strongly about her written work...

Both women are laughing; Lisa, 3 little awkwardly.

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In the 1980’s there were few written texts on music therapy. Writing was
(and is) an important and enduring way to voice one’s perspectives, especially if
that voice at all deviates from the norms set up by refereed journals. In those
days, music therapists worked in isolation (this is still true today, though our
sheer numbers and technological advances- especially the advent of the world
wide web— have created connection and communication throughout the ‘world’ of
music therapy). Finding a new book or publication in our field at that time excited
much enthusiasm and interest and in some ways, propelled the writer onto a
global stage and attracted both positive and negative attention. As in the case of
Canon and Tomas, the written voices of Lisa and Jan provided a sense of
resonance for them professionally, where prior to that time, little or none existed.
Both Canon and Tomas openly share the fact that they had difficulties with the
status quo in MT and it is true that both Lisa and Jan are innovators and
visionaries. Their individual bodies of literature are provoking and controversial,
exciting, broadening rather than limiting. For individuals who resonate with these
concepts, they are immensely attractive. Noticing and paying attention to these
resonances, individuals seek proximity; in these cases, through courses and
conferences. Potential Protégés will identify themselves as being resonant,
similar in sprit, or as ‘theirs’ (i.e. the mentor’s). Learning opportunities thus
become a method of ‘approachment' (I like this word because it denotes the
coming together or establishment of harmonious relations- (Webster 2008) with
the potential mentor. In both cases, Canon and Tomas eventually studied with
Lisa and Jan in formal University settings and in both cases, the potential for a

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mentoring relationship was initiated and set into motion by the protégés
recognizing a particular resonance and coming into closer proximity to the

mentor.

A Musicality of Being- Resonance

Resonance is a term that has been used in various ways in music
therapy. It’s attraction as a term stems from the fact that it is a scientific term that
seeks to describe a physical phenomenon. It is often used in reference to sound,
and most musical instruments have a resonant chamber that functions to amplify
and extend a particular instrument’s sound. I like to use an image that I am very
familiar with as a percussionist— a concert marimba is made from bars of wood
strung together along a frame. Beneath the bars, long tubes of varying lengths
are suspended from the frame. In more primitive versions, hollow gourds are
used for the same purpose. Whatever the material, these tubes (called
resonators) amplify and prolong the sound of the bars as they are struck with
mallets. If one plays the instrument with just the bars and without the resonators,
one can still hear the pitch, but it is not ’resonant’. The depth and color of the
pitch, the full amplitude of the tone is not realized,

It is generally believed that humans have the same potential for
resonance- both as physical beings (the phenomenon of entrainment is an
example of physical resonance) and psychologically through our interpersonal
relationships. Langenberg (1993) describes what she calls ‘resonator function’: a
state of personal openness and awareness that amplifies a particular feature or

essence of an improvisation (pg.). Langenberg believes this function to be
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intrinsic to human beings. It reflects what I believe to be an intrinsic ‘musicality of
being’. According to Langenberg, when one is Iistening‘in resonator function’ one
becomes aware of all the images, impressions, feelings and thoughts provoked
by a particular improvisation. One then uses these impressions to inform their
knowledge of the particular musical interaction. In this case, the resonator is the
Self and is both aural and psychological. Presumably, the ‘Self’ comes to the
resonance with its’ totality of being. In other words, the ‘resonator’ brings all their
filters, worldviews and experiences to the resonant moment and the resonance
finds expression through those filters.

McMaster (1996) refers to a ‘resonance of being’ in her thesis Music
Therapy: A Partnership of Listening and writes, “it is within the resonance of our
Being that we experience life” (pg. 16). In this, she cites Moyers (1995),

Human beings have a wonderful but potentially overwhelming mode of

knowing life: a deep inner resonance of body, emotion, mind and spirit

which provides us with information, intuition and the sometimes rich,
sometimes very unpleasant experience of being alive, being human, and

being ourselves (pg. 16).

McMaster’s work provides important insights to an understanding of resonance
as it unfolds between humans and within music therapy conditions in particular.
Resonance, she points out, is relational and refers to potential responsiveness as
well as specific responses. Resonance consists of the equal and opposite
phenomena of both consonance and dissonance. McMaster describes
consonance as a sense of congruence or ‘fit’ and includes experiences of
recognition, similarity, validation and appeal. The stories of Canon and Tomas
seem to feature a strong consonance in the direction of their potential mentors.

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McMaster also introduces the concept of spontaneous resonance that she
describes as the sensation we feel when in the presence of something which fits
our natural way of being or our current values or interpretation of the world. She
says that this type of resonance can occur subliminally or consciously.
Dissonance can be conceived of as a sense of challenge, foreign-ness,
incongruence or incompatibility of any relation. Interestingly, McMaster notes that
even the absence of something that is valued or ‘hoped for’ is an experience of
dissonance (pg. 18). Dissonance of this kind was apparent in both Canon and
Tomas’ experience of music therapy practice. There seemed to be an absence of
particular qualities that felt important to them as individuals. While dissonance
can repel, it is also very rich territory for exploration and definition. Earlier in this
document, I note that definitions are useful in determining boundaries- what
something is and what it is not— so is dissonance. Simply said, dissonance
allows us insight into that which is not us. Implied in this, is that there are
conditions that amplify or make larger, increase resonance; and conditions that
reduce the possibility for amplification or increased resonance. I believe that
humans seek resonance. We look to ‘fit’. We learn very early what is ‘me’ and
‘not me’. As protégés, we seek to be near the people with whom we resonate
and with whom we hope to realize amplification or increase. As mentors, we
know that we resonate more with some people than with others...however much
we would wish that to be different. As educators, we strive to be as resonant as
possible with ALL our students so that their learning may be enhanced. Still
there are those with whom there is special resonance- a sense of ‘sameness’

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and our ability to be effective as educators, therapists and mentors is potentiated.
Equally, there are people with whom we feel distinct dissonance. As educators,
we seek to build bridges to these individuals- settling for ‘good enough’
resonance so that learning in enabled- but we may never experience the same
kind of resonance and amplification we do with those who hold that natural
resonance or ‘fit'. It is also important to note that both consonance and
dissonance are present in all relationships- setting up that wonderful dynamic
that in the physical world creates vibration, tone and pitch.

Another important concept in treatment of Resonance is that of
Reverberation. McMaster describes reverberation as an experience of
consonance or dissonance that seems to persist long after its moment of impact.
It is an intensification or prolongation of resonance. This sense of intensification
corresponds to abstract art themes of magnification, intensification and
perspective (Marshall, 2007). Reverberation can also be facilitated through
resistance. McMaster notes that this is the prime function of the resonating
chamber. The function of the resonating chamber is to NOT fully absorb the
sound wave (pg. 19). In music, forced resonance occurs when a resonating
chamber prolongs and amplifies sound which would otherwise dissipate more
quickly. The waves actually ricochet against the boundaries of the container,
magnifying and amplifying them as in my previous example of the marimba. The
cabin where I retreat to write is in the mountains and along a river. Last night, I
became aware of reverberation as a thunderstorm passed overhead. One could
hear the thunder rolling through the mountains, reverberating and bouncing off

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one mountain and then another repeatedly, through the canyons and along the
river. I once counted 30 seconds of reverberation from the same clap of thunder.
This is reverberation at it’s most dramatic! The psychological phenomenon is
similar. McMaster states,” when we are filled with the impact of an experience
which we feel unable or unwilling to absorb the quality of, with/in the current state
of our being, our resistance functions like a resonating chamber, similarly
interrupting the natural tendency of experience to be integrated. When this
occurs, the impact of the experience can become more intense and persistent,
even when temporarily suppressed” (pg. 20). This concept of forced resonance
and reverberation is also found in abstract art through concepts of intensification
and magnification. O’Keefe’s interpretation of abstract realism finds intensely
colorful flowers that seem to push against the boundaries of the frame for the
magnification. The intensity of the colors, and the movement of the form give the
viewer a memorable experience of an essential quality of the particular flower.
O’Keefe herself states, “ I’m going to paint it big so they will have to look at
it...they looked because they were big....it just amused me, the idea of getting
them to see that I saw” (In Marshall, Scott & Bonito Oliva, 2007 pg. 14).

For purposes of this study, I would suggest that in positive mentoring
relationships, 3 positive resonance of consonance occurs in two directions,
reciprocally between the Mentor and the protégé (when the word ‘mentor’ is used
as a noun, it will be capitalized. Verb and adverb usages will be referred to in
lower case). A relation is initiated by the protégé’s recognition of this resonance
and this recognition results in a desire for proximity or nearness with a

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commensurate desire to be seen and known by the Mentor. In this case, both of
these resonances are Protege-initiated or driven in the sense that it is the
Protégé who first feels the attraction through some product or quality of the
prospective Mentor. My image is that of a pebble dropped in a pond. The ripples
from that ‘recognition like a pebble-dropping’ move toward the potential Mentor,
interacting with them in some fashion. In the case of Tomas, he recognized
resonance through reading Jan’s books, initiated proximity by studying with Jan,
and then coming into Jan’s awareness through a gesture of his own. In the case
of Canon, she also recognized resonance with Lisa through Lisa’s book and
through a conference presentation. As we will see, Canon initiated further
contact after a ‘chance meeting’ through her business partner. Canon sought
proximity to the extent that she approached Lisa with the idea of creating a
Master’s degree within Lisa’s University so that she could study with her.

Subsequent to this initiating gesture, a different but related process seems
to happen for the Mentors themselves, though the timing of that may be quite

protracted.

Jan

Jan arrived rumpled and creased from his long flight and entered the lobby
(full of music therapists) like an elder statesman. Tomas carried his bags and
opened doors- not in the way a hotel porter might carry bags, but more like a
caring friend. Jan was greeted with deference by others and from the corners of
the corridor “Jan’s here”, was audibly whispered. A few craned their necks.

Clearly, this is a man who is revered by many people. I began to feel excited and
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nervous. He seems oblivious to it all, whether due to travel fatigue after his long
flight from Bangkok or to a natural modesty. We have met before, and as he
passes he asides to me “Is 10:00 OK for you?”. “That’s good”, I nod and he is off
toward the offices, Tomas (though the larger of the two men) is a half-step
behind him carrying Jan’s bags. Jan does not rush. He takes calm, long strides
and his body seems relaxed, even a little concave. His eyes behind wire-rimmed
glasses seem to take in everything and everyone, though he does not interact.
He turns his eyes again to the hallway where the offices are and continues his
walk there. On the streetcar that morning, I traveled with a German music
therapist with whom I have shared important experiences in past. He is excited
to know that I will interview Jan. “Jan is my doctor-father”, he says. “What?”, I
respond in delight at the image. “That is what we call it- or what we call our
advisors- that is the English for it- ’Doctor-father’”. I am entranced. The phrase
connotes much of the quality of Tomas’ feelings toward Jan and I see that if Jan
is a ‘father’, he is the father of many children.

Jan doesn’t have the back-story that Tomas does. Jan’s story begins
without preamble, his style of speaking giving me the feeling that I am speaking
with someone who is very busy, but also concerned that I get what I need for my
research. I turn on the recorder and he wonders how long the interview is going
to take (which is a bit off-putting)...and to say that he wants to be sure that I have
enough time to get enough information for my research (a surprise, I was
expecting something less gracious to result from the time-conscious query)...did
I think that 90 minutes would be enough, because he had other meetings to

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schedule with his doctoral students and wanted to give me enough time for my
needs. Knowing the time frame, he says, will help him know how long to “stretch
his answers’- will he elaborate or shorten his responses? He says this all ‘matter-
of-fact’ and without self-consciousness. I am left with the feeling that he is quite
capable of choosing between an abridged or unabridged version of his
experience. It was an odd communication of both his importance, and my
importance to him. It left me a little off-balance, “that should just about do it, I
think- I guess it depends on how much you want to say”. “No”, he says. “I have
plenty of time, I was just wondering”, We are interrupted by a colleague (also a
friend of mine) who knocks on the door of our room and greets Jan in either
Nonlvegian or Danish. We both explain that I am doing an interview for my
research and he exits hastily.
I ask Jan the story of how he and Tomas became acquainted. Again in
his matter-of- fact manner he says,
Actually, I didn’t think so much about it because he was a student in the
80’s and...one of the earliest... of course, he was a good student- I mean,
he at that time I don’t think that he was sort of putting himself so much in
front of...|ike today- like, he’s brilliant! So at that time, he was of course a
good student but we didn’t have a personal relationship- the only thing that
I kind of made a special link was that he had been living in the same area
that I had grown up, so we had gone to the same school and that’s kind of
a very common cultural background”. And then I remember that he wrote
a very good thesis that was kind of excellent.
So it was a mirror event that brought the two men into reciprocal resonance, and

Jan recognized these points of resonance with Tomas. Jan’s written work

attracted Tomas; and it was Tomas’ written work that brought him into Jan’s field

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of recognition. In this way, Tomas ‘declared’ or showed himself to Jan as a
person of note.
Tomas admits,

I guess he (Jan) remembers from the time I was a student in 81, but in 77,

I was 19 years old and I heard about music therapy at that point...l was a

shy student. I didn’t speak much in class, and my fellow students told me

that on the last day after two years that maybe I could have been speaking
more,
and he laughs heartily about that. Jan’s feedback on the thesis was very
influential for Tomas, “He wrote a page of feedback for each student— so his
enthusiasm for these texts and his feedback at that time, that was very
encouraging...made an impression on me”.

In the poem that acknowledges my own mentor, I write that she shows me
what I can see only in hopeful shadow. Tomas alludes to this quality in Jan as
he reflects,

At that time, I didn’t know myself... I didn’t. I didn’t. I was 25, and I
didn’t kind of look into the future and l was... well, I didn’t look into the
future and say that ‘Oh, I’m going to be writing a lot’, I mean, I didn’t know
that... I thought I would go out and be a music therapist... working on the
floor (laughs)... I think that kind of feedback in a way was important for me
in the back of my head.

Secondarily, Jan and Tomas shared a cultural context. Shared context is an

important sub-theme for both dyads, and I will discuss this at a later time.

Lisa

In Lisa’s living room, she is calm and gentle. She wears a lovely smile
and seems to enjoy this interview immensely. Lisa seemed more actively aware
of being co-inspired by Canon. She reflects- speaking to us both,” ...and the

more I got to know you, the more I said, I really want to get to know you and have
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a friendship, a collegial relationship with this woman”. I take Lisa back to the
time of their initial meeting and ask her what qualities she noticed in Canon that

seemed attractive to her:

Well, if I am going to really tell the truth (and I don’t know how you
are going to handle that with your thing [indicating my research]), but from
the minute I got to know Canon, I could see a tremendous light in her. I
mean, it was just really obvious to me. Every once in a while you meet
somebody who you don’t have to reach too far and you know they are
really close, and I felt that way about Canon from the very beginning. It
was an easy and natural relationship that gave me a lot from the get-go
even though I am kind of called the ‘Mentor’ (Lisa gestures as if in quotes).
l have always had and receive a lot from being in your presence. So that
is the core about what I really felt was this spiritual connection.

After a while, the notion of sameness begins to come into my
consciousness as an interviewer and I ask, “I notice that Lisa, 3 lot of the things
you have said about Canon are very similar to what Canon has said about you
and so I wonder, I am thinking that some of those essential features that you
were attracted to are also kind of about you as well (both are nodding and saying
‘yeah’) and so in some ways it is ‘Iike attracts like’. Does that feel resonant to
you?” Both respond at once “Yes" “Oh yes”. Lisa begins to say something and
Canon jumps in again, enthusiastic and rapid-fire:

You know how you were saying, you know, love your enemy thing, it

sounds like it’s the right thing in theory and also the right thing in theory for

me and I am always struggling with embracing differences and being

excited about differences and that is OK at a certain level but sometimes, I

want the person to be exactly like me and to have the same ideas and it is

really hard sometimes to be with people who are very different.

In both dyads, there was recognition by both parties (though at different

times) of a ‘resonance’- specifically a consonance, a ‘sameness’. In these

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relationships it is also important to note that these are ‘meaningful consonances’.
They are not superficial ‘things in common’- though both members of both dyads
share important common features such as culture and gender. For Jan and
Tomas, there was a recognition of a shared value system and a similar
preferential mode of communicating those values- through writing. In the case of
Canon and Lisa, the meaningful interfaces were multifold- but they were each
significant to both women in terms of values: a way of working with people in
music and a worldview and shared spirituality that was seen as a positive

resonance between them.

Culture and Gender

For both dyads, culture and gender featured prominently in the
resonances between Mentor and Protege. In the case of Jan and Tomas, this
was, I believe more salient or subliminal, though both men alluded to their
common culture playing a role in their mutual attractiveness, though it was not
until member checking that Tomas stressed the importance (for him) of sharing a
working class background. For Lisa and Canon, the awareness of a shared
cultural position as bi-cultural women in North American society was specifically
referenced by both of them.

Lisa addresses it first as she has included specifically First Nations
cultural themes in her preliminary art work,

...this is the ground and this is the sky and for me the whole feeling of our
time together— our relationship- has been...it’s been kind of a spiritual
journey and I really felt like it was mother earth, father sky, and we were in
the world- the larger world and just dealing with ‘what can we do here?’ I

think that we have a cultural bond too because we’re both two different
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cultures (and Canon responds with affirmative hmmm’s)...and that’s been
a part of our friendship and that is the earth part too, the sense of place.

Canon later talks about the role of biculturalism in her worldview and
Lisa’s way of being with her,
She (Lisa) is really good at holding the ambiguous, the grey area. I, like,
being...well having a black dad and a white morn, feeling like my coming
to this planet at this time is really about learning how to hold these
differences and learning how to be in a grey area with open ended-ness. I
tend to want things to be either black or white...l just need to ‘get’- I need
to work on mixing the black and the white. And Lisa was just so good at
this- she makes it like OK! It can be done! Whereas in music therapy I up
to this point, I felt it was, like, behaviorist (she uses the word ‘behaviorist’
emphatically- gesturing with one hand making a cutting motion strongly
into the other hand). And on the other hand there were people ‘out there’
and they weren’t- they didn’t have any kind of structure to frame what they
were doing and that was sort of hard to translate and I did want to work
and be professional...so you know, I needed to find some kind of middle
ground there...and Lisa was just so similar to all that and that’s what I
needed and wanted.
In this way, Lisa is performing or modeling ways of being as an older woman who
also has more experience being bicultural in society, and has taken in and
worked with cultural themes herself and is therefore more aware, open and
resonant with Canon’s worldview. This area of broad function is consistent with
Kram’s model of the Mentor holding both occupational and psychosocial
functions within the relationship.
Lisa responds to this,” Yeah, that’s a lot of our work, this bridge building
between different things.” Lisa then recounts a particular dialogue in class where

the class was exploring their underlying assumptions about music and therapy.

She goes on to remember,

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And then, I said to you- OK, what if we turn this around from the
positive and make a negative statement...do you remember that?
Because we have to consider the negative too, you know?... do you
remember that?

Canon has a look on her face- like they are both someplace else,

remembering.

I remember that (laughing) and I think it had something to do with
music having a positive effect on you and you said ‘what if we flipped it
around and music can also have a detrimental effect on you’ or something
like that and I remember like ‘WHAT???’ (laughing). Itjust really made me
think about...that there’s this whole range between the positive and the
negative apart from the two polarized areas, so it was ‘yeah’.

Later in the interview, I address bi-culturalism directly with this comment
on the potential resonance between Canon and Lisa having something to do with
a similar experience of being bi-cultural in North America,

Another point of resonance between your stories and I hope that
you will comment on this- is that Lisa, you have spoken to me for years
about feeling marginalized by the music therapy community about your
work and then Canon spoke earlier about feeling marginalized about your
(indicating Canon) style of work- feeling misunderstood about her
intentions- I am wondering if that is another common experience between
you and one of the other resonances that you are feeling as well. Another
mirror in a way- and being bi-cultural...both of you have that experience.

Lisa responds,

That’s right, we are marginalized in many ways. You need to hang
onto each other when you are in that position, you know- marginalized-
but on the other hand, Ken Bruscia (another prominent music therapy
figure) said that probably that most of us who are making the big
contributions feel marginalized.

“Because you are different from the status quo”, I comment.
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Yes, because we are adding something different you know
someone once described me as being the ‘classic other’- I thought that
was really interesting- there has to be an ‘other’ in order to have
relationship and that’s in our field too (Canon is hmm-ing in affirmation to
this).

My awareness of the cultural influences on this relationship is not purely
academic. l have a personal resonance with the North American Multi-culture
and the bicultural experience within that, which propels me toward a certain
‘knowing’ on this topic through this interview and affects me as a researcher. My
stepson is bicultural. He has an African father and a Canadian mother (my
husband married our son’s mother while she was pregnant and in all but
biological ways, he is our son’s father). Our son became attracted to and
married a young woman whose father is Chinese and whose mother is American.
Both children lived in and were educated in India from the age of 8 years onward
and share that cultural experience as well. Our children have spoken of their
experiences of being ‘biracial’ (their term), the sense of ‘other—ness’ they
experienced in both India and in this country, and how that engendered a level of
connection between them- similar to Lisa’s comment of ‘we have to stick
together’. This shared experience of identity is so profound, that those of us who
do not have that experience may not be able to understand it at the same level.
Like Canon, our son, while having a white Canadian mother, physically appears
African American. Similarly, Lisa though multicultural in her heritage has the
appearance of a First Nations woman. Now that our son is an adult, his identity

is a very open and encompassing one. He identifies as Sikh- wearing the turban

and other articles of faith. He is still more closely identified by others as African

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American. My awareness of connection between our children, grandchildren and
Canon and Lisa has to do with the fact that for individuals who are bicultural, their
experience of being in the world... the ‘who am I’ quest for identity is multi-
layered and complex- and that it is something that I do not know in a personal
way because I am not biracial. l have experienced some of that ‘between-ness’
in a professional context- being both Canadian and American... but I do not wear
those differences in my body; my differences are much more subtle. Sharing a
bicultural heritage within North American culture will create a bond of shared
experience between people and I believe is a strong feature of the relationship
between Canon and Lisa. What is powerful to note is that culture and cultural
positioning contributes to the sense of ‘sameness’ that seems to have emerged
as a factor in recognizing resonance- at least with this dyad. I would not suggest
that this is completely generalized to all dyads, but it is a strong feature here.
The cultural connection between Jan and Tomas is at the same time more
subtle and more obvious. Both men are Nonrvegian. Tomas notes that it was
important for him to feel the social and values-based resonance with Jan through
his writing. Tomas also makes a point of noting that Jan’s books were written in
NonNegian and were reflective of the social reforms and values taking place both

internationally and within the country at that time.

Tomas’ story has a distinctly national feeling to it. He distinguishes
between actually being engaged in the mentoring relationship and the feeling of

having a mentor,

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I don’t think I had the concept of a mentor, but the feeling of having

a mentor...because as I told you before was about me feeling that I was

relating to this important man who was important for Nonrvegian music

therapy...like the father of everybody- every Norwegian music therapist.

That sense of place—the relevance of place and class are core elements
of cultural identity. In the process of member-checking, Tomas indicated to me
that another important element of his resonance with Jan had to do with the fact
that they were from the same working-class background and neighborhood in
Oslo. He indicated that the social values that were part of the initial resonance,
for him, could be at least in part attributed to a shared class system. For Tomas,
this shared class background has more significance than place. I wish to add a
reflection that Tomas made in member checking that is relevant and that I think is
most effectively stated in his own words:

We both grew up in the same area in Oslo, but while his family

comes from Eastern Norway, mine comes from Western Nonlvay (and I

moved west when I was nine years old). So in some ways we do share a

common background, in other ways the two of us embody some of the

major tensions in the NonNegian society: between Eastern Norway and

Western Nonlvay, between urban and rural areas, and between use of

Dano-NonNegian and New Nonlvegian (the two official Nonlvegian

languages, which to some degree are linked to the other tensions

described here). In other words; culturally, our connection is quite layered
and multifaceted.

It is not my intention to discuss Non/vegian culture in an in-depth way in
this text, other than to mention ways in which it may have influenced the
formation of this dyad. Through the very valuable member checking process,
Tomas made me aware of my position as a visitor to the country. I came to

realize that my impressions were, by necessity, limited to those of a visitor; and

while my aesthetic impressions are legitimate to my own meaning-making
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process, they have less meaning for Tomas than this issue of class. As I further
the idea of being a visitor, I also understand my position as visitor to the
relationships as well. I am grateful for the ongoing input the research participant
have had to this study as it increases its clarity.

Another level of ‘sameness’ and resonance experienced by these dyads is
gender. At this point, I am only interested in acknowledging that particular
feature. The literature (much of it previously mentioned) cites many examples of
mixed-gender dyads that both work and have problems. For some people in
certain circumstances, gender will matter and will be part of the spectrum of felt
resonance with the other. The relative importance of gender is, I believe,
idiosyncratic and can probably be described as being felt in degrees. I have an
image associated with this concept and that is to visualize all the possible
qualities that may attract one individual to another, (gender being one), like
bands on a graphic equalizer, they can each be dialed up or down depending on
the particular individuals and their location in place, time and need at the time of
meeting. What was striking initially and continues to be significant to this study is
the fact that l was unable to find any mixed gender mentoring dyads that could
meet the criteria of length of association. Mixed-gender dyads must certainly
exist— yet one wonders if they are able to thrive through the natural cycles of the

relationship.

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CHAPTER 7
The Working Relationship

“The Ideal Professional Parent”

Parental metaphors were prominent in Canon and Tomas’ stories and also
in the feelings expressed by Mentors Lisa and Jan, creating another perspective
or layer in this portrait of ‘good’ mentoring relationships between music
therapists.

Canon and Lisa

I have gone to one of those elegant take out grocer’s in Santa Barbara
and picked up a number of wonderful, gourmet dainties, both savory and sweet
along with some nice sparkling waters to help break the ice with Canon and Lisa.
I have been staying at Lisa’s ‘little place’ and she has been staying elsewhere. I
set the foods up on her kitchen table and make sure that the interview chairs are
comfortable and that my microphone and spare tapes are within easy reach. I
put on music and pull out paper and colored pens. l have just had the idea to
ask both Lisa and Canon to play with shapes and forms in art as they transition
from their drive over and begin to turn their consciousness toward reflecting on
their relationship. I feel nervous. I have never met Canon and meetings with
new people have never been my strength.

Coincidentally, Canon and Lisa arrive at the same moment, chatting and
laughing as the doorbell rings. I am shocked at first to find that Canon is a
woman of color- African American. I don’t know why I never thought to imagine

her as a woman of color. Another cultural bias is revealed and that embarrasses
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me a bit. And then I am completely surprised to find her extremely extroverted,
out— spoken and fast- talking to the extent that I can barely keep up. Lisa in
contrast is quieter, more reflective, slower-paced, yet she is terrifically animated
in Canon’s presence. The difference between them is quite striking. I am at
once glad for the food and beverage to help us all break the ice and transition
toward our task. I feel suddenly the lack of relationship, and the absence of a
shared story with these two women. I suddenly feel a little like the third, more
introverted girl on the playground or like when I see photos of my mother with my
older brother before I was born. There is a pre-me story of which I know nothing,
and that really interests me!

Canon is like a powerful flame- she burns bright, and dominates the
conversation from the start— and I feel the need to direct the energy,

Before we talk about it- let’s not talk about it yet...but holding an
image of your relationship and its meaning to you in mind, I have a little
music to play- if you would take a few moments to jot down thoughts or
images, words, phrases, anything that comes to mind about your
relationship together, your roles, your history... my image of doing this is
that we can use your art work and your words as a kind of jumping-off
place- a way to talk about your experience.

And then the music is finished and Lisa begins to speak and Canon
rushes in overflowing enthusiasm asking if she can go first.

...I had this image of Lisa cradling me but in a way that not at all
smothered or took away anything from my own individuality of like even
though this is happening, that we are separate...so that like what the ideal
and perfect mother is- if there is one- that they would like just ‘be there’
and I felt like my arms- these are supposed to be arms (she says,
gesturing to a part of her drawing) holding this little growth piece here and
then I put ‘holding, nurturing, allowing, encouraging, believing in me
without reservation or hesitation’ because I felt that Lisa saw that in me-

saw these in me and she just believed in them and without putting her own
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judgment- without trying to change me in any way, but just saw who I was

and saw the potential. And so it is the most wonderful place- but not to

the point that I do not want to leave- I guess that’s what I mean when I say

the perfect, ideal mother, like, you just feel that there is this place where I

was completely accepted but challenged and I loved being there, but I

also... it made me want to go out and do things in the world...and then

this is me going out and doing it for other people....but even if we didn’t do
it, it wouldn’t change the way she felt about us. Or wouldn’t change the
belief that we were going to do something in the world. What we had
inside of us and so that’s what that is!

Canon’s images are indeed very ‘womb-like’ in appearance (I am
unfortunately unable to include the drawings in this work as they were very lightly
drawn and are impossible to reproduce). Canon’s drawing consists of three
images, two at the top of the page and another in the middle of the page. They
are separated by words that she uses to describe qualities of her experience of
being Lisa’s protege. The notion of being inside but separate is prominent in the
image on the top left of the page. This image has the appearance of being a
heart within a larger heart and being held by even larger arms. There appears to
be a small person inside the innermost heart.

It is followed (top right) with an apparent detail of what is inside the hearts
of the previous image. This second image is even more womblike than the first,
shaped like a heart (the distinctive archetypal symbol of the creative feminine-
the V- is most evident). The walls of the outer heard are shaded in and give the
impression of being thick and protective. There seems to be a couple of potential

exit routes, but within the ‘womb’ seems to either be a garden, or a group of

people. Beneath these two images, Canon has written the words “ Holding,

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Nurturing, Allowing, Encouraging, Believing in me without reservation or
hesitation.” -

From that second- very gestational image seems to be born a spiral
(spiraling inward) toward the third image that is located at the center of the page.
At the center of this inward spiral is Canon’s perception of her own arms
(paradoxically) reaching out into the world, yet these arms are crossed. Within
her crossed arms, another V is observable. As a student of mandala symbolisms
and in particular of “The Great Round of the Mandala” (Kellogg, 2002), All of the
images have meaning to me on this symbolic level, but most notably the inward
moving spiral- corresponding to stage 3- the stage of generativity. Once again,
Canon has written words beneath this third image. They are, “ Dreaming,
Expanding, Growing, Supporting/ Being Supported.”

Lisa’s image shares some characteristics with Canon’s in the prominent V
that is central to the page...but also in the use of circular images that have a
spiraling effect. Lisa begins her image in a single spot and draws what can be
described as a cyclone-like conical spiral that begins small and increases in size
as she moves upward on the page. As the spirals move upward, they open up to
resemble inter-connected loops and circles. Wave-like lines emanate from the
triangular ‘cone’ reaching out like rays of sunlight beyond the boundaries of the
page. Toward the sides of the spiral at the bottom of the page are two apparent
spheres that seem to be co-creating the spiral (cyclone or whirlpool) and then to
the right an left appear wave-like symbols...to my eye, like reverberations; all in
all, a catalytic image of creation from the interface of two people.

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Lisa then creates a second page of words (qualities), “ Children, Peace,
Love, Energy, Work, Senses, Complexity, Place, Prayer, Laughter, Culture,
Awareness, Music, Community, Intellect, Friends and Manifest.” I believe that
Lisa intended the word ‘children’ to represent the fact that both she and Canon
are mothers and that motherhood was a common reference that Lisa particularly
valued in Canon.

Lisa seemed to really ‘take in’ the words that Canon spoke about her
being like an ideal mother- and though she reacted to that affectively- with
silence and facial expressions, her only verbal response to that was, “Aren’t I
lucky?”

Later in the interview, Lisa uses maternal language to describe the feeling
of mentoring- or the meaning of mentoring to her,

I can’t think of anybody I’ve ever been a true mentor for that I did
not really, really love. You know? So I love that feeling of loving and
viewing in that kind of the different manifestations of loving, whether that
be grandmother or mother or mentor, it’s just one thing that I think we’re
here to do.

In the special report Inside women’s power: Learning from leaders (Erkut,
2001), participants in that study frequently used mothering metaphors to describe
their leadership style. What is striking about this from the author’s point of view,
is that women seem to be feeling more comfortable and confident using
language that reflects their own experience base. “Just as men have used
military and sports metaphors to talk about their leadership, so women leaders in

these strongholds are talking about it with words from their lived experience as

women” (pg 82). Rather than simply resisting male-dominated metaphors, these
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extraordinary women leaders were able to introduce and use common frames of
reference for women. Similarly, for Canon and Lisa, the experience of mentoring

and being mentored is like mothering and being mothered.

Tomas and Jan

I am very aware of feeling ill at ease with Jan during the interview. My
speech seems a little fast and I am not able to capture the same sort of
conversational quality that I have with the other participants. Apart from having
the ever—present sense that I am sitting with a legendary figure in my field, I feel
very small...and I can hear it in my voice- which has lost some of it’s usual
resonance and easy lyricism. I try to shake myself out of it by focusing on
listening and also on making my voice noticeably lower. l have a quick memory
of another Mentor of mine- my GIM trainer who for years has been a strong and
significant force in my development...l have worked through many ‘mother’
transferences with her...but with Jan, I am connecting with her critiques of my
speaking voice being too breathy, too baby-like and high pitched...so l noticeably
lower the pitch of my voice and try to keep it there. As I listen again to this taped
conversation in the here and now, my gut tightens and I begin to feel miserable.
I hear myself saying things that I have not said with anyone else, I hear myself
responding too quickly, too cheerfully, interpreting things he is saying...and
remember how hard I had to work to feel comfortable and to move into my flow
as an interviewer. I realize that I am having a ‘father’ transference with him- the
feeling is so similar to how I felt as a child when my father would come home

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from work preoccupied and irritable, and my mother would shoo us off of him,
“don’t bother your father with that- go outside until dinner.” The feeling in my gut-
the tightness is like the tightness I felt while walking on eggshells with my father-
feeling that he was too busy and too important to our family to disturb. My father
was not always this way...but certainly during the work/school week. Jan was
hopefully not aware of this operating in me, but was gracious and seemed to be
concerned that l have what I needed- once again ‘father-like’ - providing for my
academic needs and being very willing to do so. He was very open in his
comments and responses. And eventually, I settled in.

Jan has been a music therapist and really the ‘father’ of music therapy in
Norway for thirty years. He alludes to this ‘father’ role directly as he refers to
developing a ‘new generation’ of music therapists,

I’m a professor for a lifetime, I mean, I am head of a department
and l have two professorships and also am a psychologist and also am
becoming a GIM therapist...l have been working in music therapy for thirty
years, you can feel the burden after all these years and all the students
and what you have to do, so I feel really thankful that you know there is a
person like Tomas who can take the responsibility for bringing the field
further, and here he takes the responsibility for that and because I am
retiring in ten years, so I like to see that there are many people to take
after me. I started to think about that a few years ago because it takes ten
years to raise and develop a new generation.

As previously mentioned, Jan and Tomas are actually from the same
working-class neighborhood of Oslo- having attended the same primary school.
In this way, they share foundational beginnings and do not suffer from
differences of worldview. Both men are oriented toward ideas, are scholars, and

share a work ethic.

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Tomas talks a lot about Jan as a sort of professional ‘father’ and while Jan
does not use these words, the metaphors he uses are parent-like in their effect.
Earlier in this document, I connect to an experience I had on the streetcar with a
German music therapist who calls Jan his “Doctor-Father.” Tomas himself calls
Jan the “Father of all Norwegian music therapists.” The metaphor of the good
professional parent is a key metaphor and is included in this section on
convergences because both dyads express the same feeling. Tomas is very
specific about this. We are taping our interview in one of the three airports we
had ‘layovers’ in during our travels together— I think it might have been in
Copenhagen- and carts and trays are crashing and pages are coming over the
loudspeaker in many different languages. Tomas is talking now about the fact
that he actually has 2 mentors. Both Jan and another senior and very prominent
music therapist in the United States and Tomas says, “I feel like Jan has been
opening doors, opening doors, opening doors... and then (this other man) has
been putting up signs showing directions and structuring the kind of boundaries.”
“That’s a nice balance”, I say.

“Yes, it’s fantastic! In a way I have two fathers there.” Tomas goes on to share,
...these two men have been like fathers and took interest in my work...l
mean, I hope that they did not feel like they had to take care of me, I hope
they didn’t have that feeling. But for me, they had a father-like function of
taking interest.

“Of clearing the way in front of you?”

“Absolutely”, Tomas says. “The ‘guidance’ feeling that they want me to. ...(and

here he begins to mentally search for a word in English)...

”Succeed...or do well?”, I offer.
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I didn’t want to use that word because it is not a good word in Nowvegian
language, but...it feels too American, but to succeed ...Just a cultural bias.
You are not supposed to be interested in succeeding in NonNay, (laughing
heartily). It’s much too ambitious.
We laugh together. I think that I might not actually know many people more
productive than Tomas- He has accomplished so much in his professional
life...made so many contributions. But I understand how it is that opportunities
place themselves in your path and you engage in some agreement to move into
those opportunities...and then they lead to other opportunities, and it can appear
to other people that one is ‘ambitious.’ Responding to one’s destiny does not
have the same quality as ‘ambition’ for the sake of self-service or self-
aggrandizement. I understand that to pursue one’s career from that perspective
is not really acceptable in this culture. Most of the Norwegian people I have met
are immensely humble. Again, my impression is that this humility does not feel
like an affectation to me, but is rooted in the sense of place. The natural world
feels to me to be ‘very close’ to people, even in the cities (especially in
comparison to many of the North American locations I have spent time in) Harsh
winters, the proximity to the sea, the lifestyle of living in the far north where the
summer days are long and the winter days short and dark...the proximity of
formidable mountains...this sense that people live close to the natural world and
have great respect for that. I think that there is a kind of humility that comes from
living in and close to the land. It is hard to take oneself too seriously and one
must always live with the sense of temporality. I allude to this in my prologue
’framing the terrain.’

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For Jan, this humility is evident, as it seems important that his students
become more important than himself. He repeats this several times in our
interview with an ease and certainty to his declaration,

I never regarded him just as a student; in fact, in that period he was
becoming very good support for me also because of the program in
(western Norway). No, so I say that not as a competition, more as an
alternative or an extension or whatever, or as a different perspective...

I don’t I think some of the quality of relationship has to do with I never
considered him as a student and more as an equal and now he is
probably knows more than I do in most of the feelings and writings; I never
really considered myself a mentor of Tomas- because I consider a mentor
to be a more distanced or removed person- giving more advice and I see
that Tomas is taking my advice especially when I suggest him to read
something an so on...

This sense of the Protégé being almost more important than the self is something
Jan and Lisa seem to have in common. Not, of course, to the detriment of their
own work, but for both Mentors, there seems to be a quality of ‘walking beside, or
‘letting go of hierarchy.’ I find this extraordinary as l have had some mentors in
my life who have never really been able to see me as a contributor in my own
right. Kram discusses this topic of transitioning roles as she describes the
‘redefinition’ phase of the mentoring relationship. Either the Protégé individuates
with the support of the Mentor, or ruptures and break ups occur. That shifting
from the vertical to the horizontal is another sub-theme in this work. Jan and Lisa
obviously negotiate this vertical/horizontal movement gracefully.

These parental metaphors are important to link with the idea of how the
Mentoring relationships actually work...Kram talks about the ’cultivation’ phase

taking place over 2-6 years. This is the time when the relationship is actually

working to promote, protect and advance the Protége and also to benefit the
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Mentor in the ways that they are able to benefit. Throughout this iterative cycle, I
have been brought back to an image/model of the therapeutic relationship that I
developed in 2002 and that l have revised to reflect the processes involved in the
functional mentoring relationship (fig.1). As per the figure, three conditions
support an interdependent triangle that represents the therapeutic relationship:
Forming, Maintaining and Activating. The Forming place, can be likened to the
time in the Mentoring relationship when the Mentor and Protégé are recognizing
their resonances and expanding through amplification. The work in the
therapeutic relationship, I see as corresponding again to the Mentoring
relationship through this dynamic movement between maintaining and activating.
I feel that these idealized parental projections/ or the parental metaphors that live
in these relationships are part of what actually maintains the Mentor/protege
relation. That relational maintenance enables challenge, critical feedback, the
existence of differences, what I call ‘activation’ of the relation. It is as if the well-
established relation enables the relation to actually produce something. One
cannot remain in a womb forever! What quality is it that enables the growth and
development of the protégé? However that occurs, it is clear from this study and
from other sources, that the parental metaphor is a core experience that many

people associate with mentoring or being mentored.

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Activating

  

Forced
Resonance

 

Parental Metaphors

Maintaining

 

     
   

Resonance Amplification

Forming/ Re—forming

 

Figure 1.

Model of Processes of the Mentoring Relationship

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Regulating the Relationship

Tomas further alludes to parental ‘ways of being’ when he discusses how
he and Jan ‘regulate’ the relationship. This is strikingly similar to the ways in
which Canon and Lisa use gender referenced experiences to describe their
relationship. Tomas does this as well when he speaks to how the relationship is
maintained,

its like a working relationship, A MALE working relationship. You

don’t TALK about that; you just make it work. I’m comparing it with other, I

mean for work— for work in the woods with my sons or cutting wood or if

you run a sports club with other men or do things like that, I mean, you

don’t actually sit down talking about relationship; you REGULATE it in a

number of ways, I’d say— by being more or less friendly, more or less

close.

“Ah, I see... proximity”, say I.

“And I mean”, he goes on to say

...Its not that we don’t regulate it, I mean, I think there is a lot of

attention to how the other person is doing and feeling and reacting (pause)

—- it’s not to say that we do not think about these things, but we uh,

regulate them, I would say most of the time through finding ways of

working, instead of sitting about talking about them.

“More action oriented?”, I offer.

“Yes, inter-action oriented. I mean how we work together but you know
not sitting down and talking about it...’why did you do that.’. and so on."

“So is it more indirect?”

“Yeah, and not so directly with words, but directly with actions.”

“More show me, and less ’tell me’”

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“Yeah, I think it has mostly been like that. I know what he likes and what
he doesn’t like and what he can give me, and what... he cannot give me
and I’ve been trying to respect that.”

I thank him for working so hard to communicate this regulating concept to
me. It is kind of difficult for me to understand and I say, “I think that men and
women must do that differently.”

“Probably, yes, and probably, of course, big differences between men and
big differences between women umm, I think we have to be a little careful about
generalizing.”

“But for YOU, this is how it is”, I say.

“Yes.”

This image of Tomas in the woods cutting wood with his sons- relating
through working side by side is a strong image that has endured for me as a
researcher. In the various mind maps and symbols l have come to embrace
about Jan and Tomas, this is the strongest and most persistent. l allude to this
important statement as l frame their portraits with the reflection | title “Nowvegian
Wood” and I begin with the sense of being able to see through the spaces
between the trees. Although Tomas was very rightly reluctant to generalize his
experience to ‘all men’, I find this image evocative of other experiences I have
had with men- in my family and professionally. This metaphor enhances my
sensitivity to the ways that some men ‘do’ relationships and opens my mind to
look for these gestures of regulation in lived or co-active behavior before‘pushing

toward insightful, relational dialogue.

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CHAPTER 8
Ways of Being

Mentor Qualities

Another place of resonance between the two dyads were the similarities
between the Mentor’s qualities and the ways in which they were conscious of the
Protégé.

Within the working mentoring relationship, what I have called the
‘activating’ time where the Mentor is actually guiding, giving feedback, helping
the protégé to move into their challenges, both Mentors and Protégé’s in this
study sought to find descriptors to talk about their particular style of ‘doing the
work’ of mentoring. Lisa and Canon discuss this in the context of the academic

setting where much of their work was done.

“Sword made of Clouds”

The interview is in full swing now; Lisa and Canon are flowing in
memories, reflections and maybe telling each other things for the first time. I
have brought up the topic of the levels and layers in long term mentoring
relationships, where both parties move dynamically and perhaps imperceptibly in
and out of roles like teacher/mentor/student/ supervisor/ friend. Canon reflects
on the paradox of being all these things at once and Lisa talks about how it is for
her to be opening, welcoming but also to provide critical feedback and she tells
the story of a former student who struggles to describe his perception of her

‘style’ of teaching and borrows a metaphor from martial arts: “Sword made of

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Clouds.” This metaphor is so evocative that both Canon and l reverberate with
its truth. Lisa goes on,

...and his reference for that was that before realizing it, the
comments I made on his paper had cut through a lot of the bull stuff that
he didn’t need- he said it was so soft that but it just did- things just fell
away that I didn’t need to have in those papers and I focused on things
that were important...so I thought I was just thinking about that
metaphorically being raised in the South and being sort of a mother type
and having a soft feeling...and I want to be kind and I want people to like
me, you know, all those things. Especially, I think for those of us coming
from the bicultural experience there is an aspect to trying to be a pleaser
which is elaborated in a cultural way beyond our personalities, but I think
that’s true that there’s a way I do with my mentoring- I challenge people in
that way— so I have to take responsibility for that too and I hope it’s always
clouds, I hope its never unkind, you know?

Canon responds quickly to this,

I don’t think you could be, you know? Yeah, I think that IS your
style. I think it’s great because that’s...that feels right to me- I could trust
you to be honest with me and it didn’t just cut through the crap, it wasn’t
done in a mean way, it was very gentle and supportive and it inspired me
to want to go on to do the next thing. And I think I know for myself that
most of the time in educational settings, I felt like I have been criticized a
lot- I am a perfectionist, I know that. So I think and it’s the criticism- it’s
not been unduly harsh, but its criticism.

Lisa and Canon dialogue about this:

“ It can be dehumanizing too. Sometimes there’s a standard approach to
education to the way that teachers handle people”, Lisa says.
Canon also reflects on Lisa’s ability to inspire her toward the very best she is
capable of:

...You could challenge me and push me but it was always in a
really loving way. Even if I had totally missed the point of what I was
trying to say... I mean, I was so used to having teachers who were just
critical and it was hard and I really took everything to heart because I

really wanted to please everybody and you know it was Lisa just accepted
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me for who I was. And she just valued me for who I was. I have always

felt seen and heard by her.

The ‘sword made of clouds’ metaphor was an intriguing one to me and l
have since reflected on it in terms of my own teaching, supervising and
mentoring. However kind we are; however loving, soft - spoken and soft —
natured, there is a time for boundary making and a time for cutting through inertia
in both self and others. In my faith tradition, we wear an article of faith that we
call a Kirpan, or knife. Some people wear very large and pronounced Kirpans.
Mine is very small and is either on a chain around my neck or tucked into my
turban or otherwise hidden in my clothing. The Kirpan is meant to represent the
sword of consciousness and reminds us as that our work as beings of spirit is to
cut through illusion or ‘maya’ into the clarity of truth, or pure light. I have had to
struggle with finding the balance of establishing reasonable boundaries with
students for their sakes. While validating and nurturing, I must also be willing to
confront about challenges. It has been one of my greatest learning edges and
Lisa’s image of the ‘Sword made of Clouds’ is one that I hold to as I enter into
challenges with and on behalf of others. The sword made of clouds metaphor
yielded benefits to me most recently as I confronted a ‘very special to me’
student (who I imagine will always be in my life) around some very difficult
behavior. As I sought to explain, having unconditional positive regard for a
person does not mean that one casts a rosy glow over problematic

areas...unconditional positive regard means that we can distinguish between the

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essence of the person and their behavior and hold the paradox of ‘what is’ with
‘what can be’ and help them toward that vision- sometimes painfully. .

Tomas did not speak as much about feedback as did Canon and Lisa,
probably due to the number of overlapping interfaces between the two men. But
for him, the essences of working together in the mentoring relationship had
similar tones of the ‘gentle/grit’ paradox referred to so beautifully through

metaphor by Lisa. This ‘gentle-grit’ quality had great meaning for Tomas.

Active Support- Chopping Wood

Tomas works to describe the meaning of the relationship with Jan to me,
and I inevitably return to that co-active image of chopping wood. While Jan’s
books and the classroom setting were fundamental building blocks of their
relationship, it was not until later that the two men had the chance to work
together and Tomas was able to experience the full force of Jan’s support.
These times have great meaning for Tomas. Tomas had an opportunity to
develop a music program whose aim was to integrate ‘typical’ community
members with persons with disabilities through music making. This grant-
funded project took him to a more remote part of Nonivay. The success of this
community program led the developers to feel that a new kind of music therapy
education might be possible in this place. Over the course of two years, with
Jan’s assistance, this new program was designed, funded and approved to go.
Tomas reflects,

...because that demonstrated very much his quality- because I was
30 and the other two teachers at that time were very young, so we needed

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some very good teachers, and uh, he was willing to come to this place
four times every half-year...that was a big effort...a huge contribution.
I respond, “So that’s giving you support in a very tangible way- a lot more
than ‘yeah, yeah, I support you- lip service’.”

“Oh yes”, he continues, “

It was very strong support- very strong support, and I felt that very
strongly and he did that for two years or something like that before
we...after two years we found that we knew more of what we were doing,

so he took a step back and started to come only once in a half-year- you
know? Instead of four times...so that demonstrates his willingness to

support.

I make some unintelligible noises in my throat as Tomas’s voice has
gotten quiet and I am aware as he blinks- his eyes are huge and blue and I can
tell that he both thinks and feels deeply. Taking a graceful sip from his glass of
wine, he breaks the silence and continues quietly, “I'm very grateful about that,
you know? I always will be, I mean, we wouldn’t have make it at that time if he
didn’t do that.”

As previously mentioned, Tomas and l engaged our interview over space
and time in three different locations. Later in our interview, over copious refills of
coffee in a restaurant in Denmark, our talk becomes energetic and he is speaking
to the different roles and functions Jan has held for him over the years and that
they all involved co-action between the men.

Very much, this relationship has been not specifically linked to him
as my supervisor. It has only been a small part of it. Actually, as I told
you, he’s right now this autumn more behaving like a supervisor than he
has ever done. He’s been the supervisor for my thesis...it’s adding a layer

to some degree. He has been, of course, reading my texts before, both as

a friend and colleague and as a former supervisor too, but this time, he is
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actually reading chapter for chapter— each chapter. He never did that
before. And giving feedback in a more detailed level than
before...because part of his role as a supervisor has been very much from
the bird’s perspective- the overview perspective. Not going into details...

I comment, “He’s probably not as detail oriented as you are.”

“No”, Tomas admits, “ but he’s also doing details more than before. So I
kind of enjoy that and I take it as an extra bonus”, we both are chuckling softly,
but he goes on, ”because he’s not doing it in an intrusive way— he’s still.”

“I couldn’t imagine. Being intrusive does not seem to be a part of his
nature, really”, I comment.

Tomas continues, “ No, it’s not. So very much how he has been helping
me is like that. Like, a kind of model...” and here he pauses.

“Hmm”, I say...”l don’t want to say ‘role model’.”

No- that is too narrow. I can see that in the description of your
research project, that you put ‘Wise Guides” (Portraitist’s Note: The
preliminary title for this study was ‘Wise Guides: Portraits of Mentoring
Relationships between Music Therapists). And at the first minute, I didn’t
like that because I thought that was kind of premature to have that title
before that study and not after...but it started something in me, reading
that, because I realized that he has been important for me because he is a
wise man. As a young student, of course, I admired his, uh, academic
skills in a way, or the books he seemed to have been reading, and his
ability for developing good arguments. And as I developed myself, of
course I get the more realistic perspective, and I can see that he didn’t
read every book, there are weaknesses to his thinking, it gets more
human and realistic, but his importance for me has not diminished. There
are other aspects which are now more important and I think those aspects
have to do with being wise.

Such a wonderful part of the conversation between us, and we are

interrupted by a waitress asking us something in Danish, and Tomas

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responds (I wonder how many languages he speaks well?) and I try to
guide us back to that moment of articulation,
I’m very interested in this...when the Mentor becomes
human- you know, when they touch down and how it can still be OK
for them not to be, you know, perfect...but I like your point about

what they retain for us- and for you part of the reason for the
retaining of esteem has to do with wisdom.

“Personality and wisdom,” he responds.

I feel I have learned lots from his personality too. I mean, he
has sides that I don’t have. I mean, he’s at times he’s more open,
more flexible, more relaxed...especially more than I used to be. So
there have been a lot of things for me to respect and learn from his
way of being and also for his way of not being dominating- I mean,
that has been a model too. Because in my University, of course, I
have a role which is to some degree now similar to his. I was the
first, and I am the one who is writing the most, I have the voice to
some degree that is similar, and I think that l have things to learn
from his things I would like to be like, ways I would like to be like.

It has been twenty- six years since Tomas first read Jan’s books. In a
way, they are the “father and son’ of Norwegian music therapy. And Tomas is
still finding the models, still finding something to learn from Jan. The quality of
this relationship speaks volumes to me about the quality of both men as
individuals. Jan, in his quality of openness and powers of cultivation; and Tomas
in his quality of seeing and recognizing value and his ability to receive
meaningfully from Jan.

Tomas is very articulate with the English language, and he also struggles
to find the right English words to communicate the complexity of his thoughts

(perhaps indicative of his orientation toward detail). My sense is always that the

language is not big enough for him. With that preface, and though I am not sure
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he would have used a better word, had it been at his disposal, I was interested in
his sudden use of the word ‘model.’ That word had not crept into any of our
previous dialogues, nor did it come up with Canon and Lisa. Lu Ann Darling, in
her book “Mentoring Mosaic” actually chooses an appropriate term in her use of
the word ‘mosaic’ as it seems to communicate the diversity of the mentoring role.
She proposes that ‘mentoring models’ occur throughout our lives but that the
idea of life models are first introduced to us by our parents or by parental figures
at an early age (pg. 131 ). In Darling’s study, the participants who had successful
mentoring relationships recalled having had models as young people- both
presented or inherited from parents (or parental figures) or models that they
discovered on their own. Interestingly, and most relevant to Tomas’ experience,
Darling writes about how models change. She writes that some models remain
in our consciousness as lifelong models and companions. Others diminish in our
sight as their imperfections become more evident through the passage of time
and/or as we develop new standards of excellence. Needs are fulfilled, needs
change, and there are times when the mentor/model is no longer deemed as
necessary. Clearly, as Tomas developed as a professional in his own right, his
esteem for Jan did not diminish, rather the relationship or Tomas’ perception of
Jan became in fact more nuanced, and he was able to grow into and with the
changes in both himself and Jan.

Another interesting resonance between these two mentor/protege dyads is
the similarity of views around the hierarchies inherent in their relationship. There

is a direct relationship to negative space data from individuals who were not able

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to be included in this study. By far the most common reason for excluding
people from the study had to do with differing perceptions of hierarchy-
particularly among the mixed-gender dyads. This was virtually universally
referred to as the ‘verticaI/horizontal’ axis around which the mentoring dyad must
be able to move and live its dynamic nature. It would seem that this is a

particularly necessary feature of a long-term mentoring relationship.

The illusion of hierarchy

I can feel myself frowning in the way I do when I am concentrating.
Something is here that is either not what it seems- whether that is by design or
that both women are in some mutual delusional state, but Canon and Lisa
seemed so happy to be together, as if this interview was also giving them an
opportunity to say things to one another that they had not had the chance to do
before. From my previous study of Kathy Kram’s material in particular, I was
interested in two very pivotal times in the mentoring relationship: the time of
‘initiation’ that involved the dyad forming mutual attraction, and then that time in
all relationships when conflicts arise. Canon and Lisa were so complimentary to
one another. They seemed to me to be living and owning a very collaborative
and egalitarian relationship. I decide to begin to ask questions that might lead
them to discuss points of departure from this very idyllic picture of an inter-
relation they had been painting. I started to pinpoint areas that are known to
challenge mentoring relationships and asked about the various roles they played
and the hierarchy inherent in the relationship. Lisa obviously held power and

influence in the relationship during those early days as she ‘graded’ and
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‘supervised’ Canon’s work. I begin this part of our discussion awkwardly. I
always talk a lot when I feel awkward, as if to explain to others...when actually I
am processing my thoughts aloud and it sometimes takes a while to get to the
point...but here, I am clearly hedging around my point...not wanting to upset the
apple cart. I address this statement to Lisa:

You know, one of the things that stands out for me is that you keep
saying ‘we’ go there, ‘we’, you know? It’s not that you take someone
somewhere but that ‘we’ go there together- we do this learning together...
and it seems that you embrace the relationship as something...well, as if it
is something reciprocal...maybe you are also receiving in the relationship,
but it sounds to me like you see this as a journey together.

Lisa responds, “Oh totally, totally.”
Painfully, I continue,

Like, you are connected and equal in the inquiry. Even though you
are the more experienced person or you can see the road ahead or have
been down the path before, but you know that it will always be a different
path for a different person, and you know I hear THAT in what you are
saying with your ‘we’ language... Very reciprocal in many ways and you
mentioned in your artwork that that was true for you.

Lisa seems to understand what I am trying to say and responds,

Well, what I get from it, I get a lot from it. See, I don’t really like
hierarchical relationships, cuz I do feel that we’re each endowed with a
unique spirit and we are just here to learn from each other- just cuz I have
the role in society that l have...you know like a PhD or duh duh
duh...doesn’t mean that I have power- that there should be a hierarchy.
“But what about when there is an inherent power structure”, I persist. “And

power and influence within the structure- like the professor relationship?”

Lisa groans, “Oh God!!!”

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I am insistent, “I mean when the power is inherent in that, how do you
negotiate that given the values you just stated to me?”

Lisa has paused as if she is really taking in what I have said and Canon

begins to speak for them both,

I don’t know what it is like for other people, but I know for us it was
just that thing of we’re just two beings here doing this and yes, she is
going to say...yes these are the assignments, I am going to do them
because I want to grow. I feel that we are two independent people taking
responsibility for our roles. We see that power structure we see the
hierarchy and we both made an agreement that we are going to take
responsibility for our own part and work within these structures but that
does not define what our relationship is really about.

Lisa affirms, “Yeah, I think she is right on- totally, that the external

structures do not define us.”
I paraphrase, hoping to draw Lisa out even more on this,

So it sounds like you made an agreement that for right now we’re
going to hold this positioning and you’re going to give me assignments
and I am going to do them and it’s part of the contract that you work out
together. For this particular space in time, which doesn’t define the
relationship, and doesn’t mean that it is going to end when that space and
time shifts to something else. It doesn’t have to shift any more.

Lisa speaks now,

No. . .and there is no reason why we cannot move the different roles
around because that’s probably more why this description of Canon’s IS
because we’re just beings and the roles are artificial in some ways, but
they’re useful in certain ways but they are not defining us. It’s different in
a big University and I think that’s probably one of the reasons why I had to
leave is because I couldn’t function like that...you know, we’re so
privileged to have small university where we could operate in our own
ways, but it is harder in a big institution where there are so many forces
that are working against that kind of relationship.

Canon continues this thread,
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So I feel like that in this life there are all these roles and structures
that have been developed and I can move in and out of them OK? But my
approach to people is always I’m here and this is what I am doing and I
am expecting that you are going to do what you do. But it’s like in my
business, if someone is NOT going to do what they do, I can’t have them
stay. Because they have to be responsible for themselves.

In this exchange, Canon and Lisa are reflecting once again, a shared
worldview of ‘how people are’ with one another. They both express beliefs in a
connection between them based on a shared essential nature, and that the
structures outside of them, the institutional cultures and rituals of both the
University and the Profession are ‘merely’ externals and those are ephemeral-
changing, therefore the roles and responsibilities for the relationship are
reflective of their shared worldview and are able to shift and flex- doing only
surface homage to the externals— knowing that they are not ‘reality in this sense’
but part of an illusion. In the early days of my ruminative cycles with all of the
interviews, I came upon a descriptor for the mentor characteristic that was
borrowed from Lisa herself, and that was that the Mentor held the Protégé within
a ‘particular state of consciousness.’ Lisa seemed to have a particular way of
seeing, perceiving and understanding Canon that allowed Canon to fully inhabit
her personhood, and her role as a junior music therapist without taking anything
away from her- without oppressing her into a subordinate position that
disempowered Canon. Somehow, Canon received the message that she was

competent just as she was; capable; intelligent; powerful; and that Lisa’s role was

to guide her toward her own goals. I see that there was a particular state of

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consciousness with which Lisa held Canon that allowed for that kind of openness

and deep seeing.

Jan
Jan communicates similar perceptions of Tomas,

Well, you know, I never considered Tomas to be a
student...The very crucial thing in our relationship was that I
supported the idea of another training program very strongly. I
think that is a really important thing because I could have perhaps
said no, no, no, there is only room for Oslo, or whatever- yeah, you
don’t think that you can do this for someone, but I supported the
idea very much and from then on, I think we started to work
together very much...but then he was not a student any more, he
was a colleague... I taught there 6 times a year for four or five
years and of course I started to visit with his family, and I got more
in and he took good care of me while I was there and we started to
talk more- he would pick me up at the airport and we started to talk
more and discuss music therapy. I never regarded him as a
student in fact in that period he was becoming a very good support
for me also because of the program...in his capacity, he could give
very important input into our program...and I saw that not as a
competition, more of an alternative or an extension or
whatever. . .as a different perspective.

Jan moves in his conversation now and returns to his ‘bird-eye’
perspective and uses ‘we’ language similar to what Lisa uses as he reflects,

His development really started when he got a position as a
research scholarship at the University of Oslo— that must have been five
years ago or so. I think that we got this idea that he could do this to have
his doctorate. He said so and then we decided to apply for a scholarship
to the University and we got the scholarship which was quite difficult,
because you had to compete with other schools and from there he got a
very good working conditions there and he also got into a very strong

group.
I am impressed and comment,” He is very modest, he did not mention that

to me.”
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“No- I think he got much benefit from that because from this he got
economic resources too.”

“That’s a big help to a scholar, isn’t it?” I say.

“Yes, so ever since then his development is like a rocket, I mean it is you
know the last three years, he has exploded.”

“Yes, he has”, I agree wholeheartedly.

But Jan continues now,

So, I don’t think some of the quality of the relationship has to do
with I never considered him a student and more as an equal. And now he
probably knows more than I do in most of the feelings and writings, I know
I can learn a lot from him and discuss with him- I don’t have time to read,
and I can depend on his information...l think I shall soon be HIS student,
helaughs.

"I think we're all his students”, I finish. But I am noticing Jan’s powers of
cultivation of the environment ‘around’ Tomas that allows Tomas to realize his
potential, and also that Jan seems to take no credit for that- the success is all
Tomas.’ In spite of Jan’s protestations around the use of the term ‘mentor’, he is
functioning exactly as Kram describes.

We continue talking about how Jan is working hard- supporting his many
current students at the University and then he goes back to speaking about
Tomas,

You know, when your study was mentioned, Tomas mentioned to
me that l was his ‘mentor’ and I can see that some of the students are now
calling me ‘Mentor’ and treating me like a Mentor, and I never considered
myself a Mentor of Tomas, because I consider a Mentor to be a more
removed or distanced person- giving more advice. Yet, I see that Tomas
is taking my advice, especially when I suggest him to read something and
so on...he reads anything I remotely mention...but I never go into anything

psychological with him- like I also give my student’s life advice and we
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discuss explicit choices...so I am balanced between counseling
psychologist and academic Mentor.

I ask Jan why he thinks that he does not go into the psychological with

0

Tomas. He responds,

Yeah, I am understanding of people’s lives- I give advice on family
matters and social things- but I never did that with him- it was idiosyncratic
to that relationship but had to do with his personality also so we did not go
private, it was strictly academic but also a good healthy personal
friendship in a sense. I like to be with him and have a beer and so forth,
and consider him one of my friends, but I am not his, umm therapist.

I speak a little about how it is not uncommon for mentors to not be aware
of the depth of their importance to others and Jan replies,

That’s probably so, too, yeah. Sometimes I can feel that this
person has kind of great respect for me and it has been growing and I am
getting the signs now from one that mentions me in the forward of her
book...and in fact I have a PhD student who now is calling me her Mentor,
so there must be something to it...l always try to make people aware of
their choices and sometimes people are not aware of them. If you do this,
this is your choice, I don’t care, but just know the consequences of it. Like
Tomas and his thesis, you know, I would tell him ‘if you do this it will be
more work than you think right now’, and of course, I was right and so he
didn’t get to finish his dissertation at that time but I said to him, I know him
so well that he would be OK so I wasn’t worried.

Resonances- recapitulated

Both of the Mentors in this study shared the common characteristics of
openness, gentle but constructive feedback, and ways of being that resonated
with their Protégés . Included in these ways of being was an apparent
willingness to work within the roles they each had to support and further the

development of the Protégé. This is in spite of the fact that neither Mentor

actually ‘bought into’ the idea of mentoring. As a researcher, but mostly as a
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person who wants to mentor well, I can learn from this that an exemplary Mentor
engages a particular state of consciousness that holds the Protégé in a very

open field- taking time to get to know them and finding ways to understand their
particular dreams, strengths, limitations and cultivates the environments around
them as much as is within our power so as to enable the realization of their
talents, dreams and goals. I am reminded of the origins of the word Mentor as
holding the person in mind- mindfully acting on behalf of another. Neither Lisa
nor Jan seems to be acting out of self-interest. The common counter-
transferences do not seem to operate in these relationships. What that
phenomenon is due to is an interesting question, but I have no data to enable me
to move into that more fully, other than to say that for each pair, there is a healthy
kind of distance between them...like Tomas’ image of chopping wood or like my
image of the Norwegian forest, with spaces between the trees- enough space for
light to shine through. My intuition is that spaces are important to the survival of
these relationships as well. They seem to be ‘close enough’ to be effective and
to experience the joys of mentoring for both sides of the relation, but not so close
as to be symbiotic or smothering, overpowering. I think that this sense of ‘close-
enough’-ness will be idiosyncratic between individuals within the dyads. Jan and
Lisa seem to posses that wisdom that Tomas was talking about to know the
degree of closeness that would still allow function and not dysfunction.
Obviously, the distances differ between dyads here. Canon and Lisa seem to be
able to sustain closer proximity in many ways, as they use words to describe

sharing a wide plane but closely. I would not venture to attribute that proximity to

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gender, but it is one possible explanation. Culture, class and personality are
other possible contributing factors. In the member-checks, Tomas spoke about
the resonance of proximity between himself and Jan potentially being a product
of their compatible personalities: specifically that both men are ‘shy introverts.’
This would not seem to be the case for Lisa and Canon, who have seemingly
very different personalities. Further research may be able to isolate these

factors and investigate this part of the phenomena more closely.

Protégé Qualities

In one of the courses I teach, I begin my unit on Elder Care with a class
activity that involves a free association on what ‘old people’ are. I ask for
descriptors of all kinds and for the ‘real’ thoughts and underlying feelings about
elders. Once that is complete, I ask the question, “When I am old, lwill be...” It
does not take long for the individuals in my class to get my point. When the
object becomes the subject—things change. In much the same way, I asked the
Protégés in this study if they currently mentored others and if so, what made for a
‘good Protégé?” Similarly, I asked the Mentors this question as well. I was also
interested in mixing the roles a little bit- ‘would I consider myself to have been a
‘good’ protege? If I had to mentor myself, would I?” My second motivation in
asking this question was to see if anyone’s ideas supported Allen, Poteet and
Burrow’s (1997) idea of the protégé’s attractiveness having to do with being an
extension or mirror of the Mentor’s self.

Lisa and Canon have just finished talking about how, for them, one of the

initial levels of ‘bonding’ (in their words) had to do with a shared intellectual
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curiosity and the ability to ‘go deep’, and I decide to ask Lisa to generalize
outward from the relationship just a bit and to tell me what, for her, makes for a
‘good protégé.’

“Oh! That’s a great question!” she begins.

It’s just such a mystery, you know? Well, I think that there is this element
of spontaneity that I would have to preface my answer with- to say that it is
true in my life too, that when the student is ready, the teacher arrives. So
the people I have had the strongest mentoring relationships with are
people who I have felt called me into the relationship in different
ways...because I never, sort of, put myself up as a Mentor.

And we all laugh at the expression on her face as she says that word and she
goes on to joke, “Mentor available, $100/hr.” It is ludicrous to her that she would
put herself out in the world in that role- as if it were to put on airs. We all calm a
little and she goes on,

But it is something that I feel is a response- I respond to a call, I mean that
is my experience of the Mentor role at play— so that it makes for an instant
receptivity, you know? So the first criterion for a good Mentee is that they
call me! You know?

The laughing starts up again. In this way, Lisa is supporting the finding
discussed in my earlier chapter on resonance...the idea that it is the Protégé who
actually initiates the mentoring relationship with the potential Mentor after
becoming aware of a positive resonance in their direction. She continues,

Some way or another, they initiate it and then I think the other criteria (and
don’t let anyone know I ever used the word ‘criteria’), the other would be
that there’s a commitment, you know? That this is a relationship that is a
real relationship- so that if there are hard times, or misunderstandings it is
someone who is receptive to working those things out...Now l have
released myself from being a Mentor when I felt challenged beyond what I
felt I was capable of handling. . .actually only one person in my whole life.
But I think also having a shared interest/ a passion for things, well, I am
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going to match them and we’re going to go just as deep as we can...we

take it as far as we possibly can with the intensity of the learning and

dialogue and relationship and everything. And of course, there is a clearly
spiritual element and there is some mystery about why we are
together...and then I think it has to be people who have some sort of

intellectual ability, uh, if we’re talking about a Mentor for learning, then I

need to fly and challenge the person and know that they want to keep

learning, like I won’t go further than they want to go, so there’s only been
maybe a handful of really truly relationships that have been or are

Mentor/Mentee- and I think that needs to be there, so they aren’t afraid to

travel intellectually too...so these are some of the things.

It seems to me that for Lisa, a ‘good’ Protégé is someone who allows her
to be all she can be as a Mentor- across multiple fronts- academic/intellectual,
spiritual, occupational and psycho-social/personal. l resonate with this idea
myself, and become aware that my own ‘favorite’ students are ones who
question me and ask for more, who dig deeply into themselves, who have
commitment and interest in exploring beyond the stated goals of our endeavor.

Unlike Lisa, Jan has no definitive set of criteria that defines a ‘good’
Protégé. As he speaks one can, however, infer these preferences as he
identifies qualities in Tomas that he values and responds to. Many of these
qualities have been mentioned before but can also be found articulated in tables
1-4 (pgs. 149-151). He also indicates throughout his interview, that he gives to
each person what he or she is prepared to receive and I am reminded of how it
felt for me at the beginning of our interview: Jan wanting to know what kind of
time I was expecting to devote to the interview so that he could regulate his

responses accordingly. The metaphor I hold for Jan is that he judges the

soundness of the container and only puts into it what it can hold, but he does not

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seem to restrict his offering in any other way other than the capacity of the
Protégé.

Both Jan and Tomas indicate that theirs is a special and unique
relationship, and my sense is that he has given more to Tomas than he has to
others, perhaps by virtue of the qualities of close-ness they have with one
another, yet there is an undeniable similarity of worldview between the men.

This shows up more in Tomas’ interview than in Jan’s. Jan is very ‘easy-going’
and it is hard for me to imagine that there would ever be a good enough reason
for him to NOT offer what he could to a more junior music therapist, his general
humility seems to prevent him from actually knowing, or at the very least, stating
his value.

Tomas, on the other hand has a clear vision of what, for him, constitutes a
‘good’ Protégé. He is now in a position to be filling the Mentor role for others and
he acknowledges having a ‘couple’ of Protégé’s at the time of our interview.
Tomas and I distinguish between the more formalized mentoring relationships
that are inclusive to his role as a program director of a music therapy program
and the more spontaneously forming relationships that he currently has with two
junior therapists. He begins talking about one person in particular who he finds
‘stimulating’ because “you give him just a little (he gestures with his hands) and
he does this much (his hands move outward to indicate a much greater amount)”
He goes on,

Well, I think that they need to be creative and he or she needs an engine,

you know what I mean? And they really have to have a need for

Iearning...l mean, I don’t see the point if that person doesn’t want to go

somewhere. I mean that it must be quite strong actually for it to develop
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into a strong mentor relationship. I mean, sometimes, you know, you have
to supervise people who do not have that strong engine.
“True”, I say. He continues with a very definite tone,
And you have the responsibility to try to help them as much as you can,
but if it has the character of a mentor relationship I would say that they
would need to have this self-starter to want to go somewhere and to have
ammabn
“So, motivation”, I am paraphrasing.
“STRONG motivation...not only motivation, but STRONG motivation”, he is
emphatic.
“For you”, I say.
“Yes, for me it is quite important...in general...well yes, for me that is my
statement. Probably everybody wouldn’t agree but...” and then after a pause, he
begins to talk about why it is so important to have this strong motivation. He
continues, “I think there are several reasons, first of all, I don’t think that if you’re
talking about successful relationships...l mean really successful”...and then I
cannot quite understand his meaning but suggest that maybe we need to find
another word for successful for this because it doesn’t seem to be the right word
for him. And then almost as an aside, as we struggle for the right word,
Yes, it depends on how you use it, if you use it boldly to, to mean a (and
then his words slow and he begins to speak very thoughtfully) relationship
that promotes development and growth to make THAT happen, I think that
the motivation of the Protégé needs to be quite strong...l REALLY think
that because, I mean, it is a long way to go. It is a hard way to go, yeah.
It is a hard way to go, there’s going to be lots of troubles, lots of hard work

and lots of frustration and if you don’t have strong motivation, I don’t think
you’ll make it.

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“Yes”, I say this softly...l hear that his path has not been easy, and that the
climate he works in is not easy, and that a life of the mind...the life that he leads
holds tremendous challenges. I also hear that he is willing to help another
through that, but that he is not willing to put forth energy if the person does not
have the commitment and grit to do their own work too. That is what I hear in
this very intense exchange. And he begins to lighten again,

“...also if you need to push, I mean then you probably wouldn’t want to be a

mentor then.”
“Would it feel too dependent?” I ask.

Yeah, yeah. I think part of what makes you a Mentor is that the Protégé
stimulates you and that he or she has created new things...unexpected
things so that you feel that you can learn from the Protégé. In those two
relationships I was thinking about- part of my joy is WOW! This is
interesting- you know? didn’t think about that. They show me new
things, you know? So it’s two things: it’s creative and motivated. I would
probably guess also open and willing, you have to be willing to see new
things.

“So responsive to you and to the things you offer?”, I paraphrase again.

Yeah, responsiveness meshed with autonomy. If he or she is doing
exactly what you are thinking, it gets boring. You need to have some
autonomy there...and that gives a freedom because I can, we can actually
enter more difficult, thought-provoking material, because when we get
freedom, I can think loud, I can think wild ideas, wild thoughts (he says
this with passion), because I know that he’s assessing things and making
his own choices and not just copying my ideas so it makes the whole
relationship much more creative...much more stimulating. So these are
some of the things.

Earlier in this document, I refer to the concept of amplification and its
interpersonal application to the initial phases of the mentoring relationship- where

the relation is so resonant that each individual actually serves to amplify and

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reverberate the other, but Tomas’ statements here seem to indicate that it is a
more reciprocal, more simultaneous resonance where BOTH parties are
amplified and the ideas (in this case) actually reverberate, get larger and persist
because of it.

Canon has just finished talking about how she feels able to move in and
out of roles, especially institutional ones and concludes with a statement about
people who work for her needing to be able to take responsibility for him or
herself. I ask her to elaborate on this, wondering if she is able to bring the same
qualities of equanimity she received from Lisa to her work with junior therapists,
or potential Protégés. Mostly, Canon seems to mentor occupationally and
reflects on this function as a business owner. Canon owns and operates a music
therapy service agency in the greater Los Angeles area and employs thirteen
music therapists on average.

I feel like Lisa has really influenced me in the best possible way as I
said with the people who come...| feel that the people who come and want
to work for me. ..l’m kind of checking it out...do I get that feeling like, are
we supposed to be together? I feel like I am verbalizing what Lisa just did
for me, both in that (referring to the educational institution where she
studied with Lisa) space and what she continues to do- but I feel like I am
there really to just have a space- like, I’ve tilled the garden a little bit and
they can go now and work as music therapist and be identified as music
therapists and that’s the structure that we have and their job title and they
can go and be respected in the ways of the world by being compensated,
you know, better than they get in a lot of other places, and also that l have
laid the ground work that we are professionals, we turn in professional
reports, we communicate with you about what we are doing and that is
laid out for them, BUT they are going to go in there and they are going to
learn about themselves and they are going to develop music therapy
through their clients. I’m just holding that space and I’m really not going to
tell them how to do that. Because I trust their own evolving process and I
really feel like, you know, that is what Lisa did for me. She trusted in me
when sometimes I just didn’t even know I had it in me.

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It seems that for Canon, it is important to offer her employees (who she
views as protégés or potential protégés) a ‘space’ similar to what she
experienced with Lisa, but obviously in a different (occupational) setting. Her
statements have resonances with Tomas’ as he struggles to communicate that
while many people may come across your path as potential Protégés through
one’s involvement as an educator, therapist, or business owner, there will be
perhaps only a few who stand out as holding the potential as a Protégé partner in
a mentoring relationship. Tomas’ criteria were fairly specific. Canon relies on
pure resonance- offering unconditional space to all and waiting to see who will
flourish within it. It is unclear whether Tomas has actually modeled his mentoring
style upon his experiences with Jan. My sense from the tenor of our entire
interview is that there are strong similarities between their styles, but that Tomas
is his own person with his own style and values. These are possibly informed by
his positive experiences and shared values with both Jan and his other mentor
(the American), but he is very thoughtful and I believe most capable of taking
what feels authentic for him and leaving the rest. Canon appears to be more
strongly influenced in style by her experiences with Lisa, and because her
interface with potential Protégés is mostly occupational (as opposed to Lisa’s
interface including the academic), she has not been overly challenged to move

beyond the boundaries of that particular function to expand her role.

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Protégé Characteristics- Recapitulation
Aggregating data is not a feature of Portraiture as a research method, but
I was curious about how closely related the views about ‘good’ Protégé

characteristics were for these participants (see Table 1).

 

 

 

Lisa Canon Jan Tomas
-Spontaneity -Open space -Open -Stimulating
-Feels called to -Feels called to -‘Bril|iant’ -‘an engine”
-Protégé initiated -Protégé initiated -Offers new ideas -Strong motivation
-lnterpersonal -Acts on advice -Creative
commitment -Offers
-Shared interests/ new/unexpected
passion things
-lntellectual ability -Open

-WiIling to see new
things
-Responsive
-Autonomous

 

 

 

 

Table 1. Aggregation of Protégé Qualities by Participant

The most prevalent quality cited by the participants had to do with the
Protégé being intellectually adept (5 responses) (Table 2). Both male and female

participants identified these qualities.

 

lntellectually Adept

 

 

Intellectual ability
Brilliant
Brings new ideas
Brings new and unexpected things
Willing to see new things

 

Table 2. lntellectually Adept
140

 

 

The second most prevalent quality identified were qualities related to

open-ness (3 responses) (Table 3) and were also mentioned across genders.

 

Open-ness

 

 

Responsive to an open space
Open to new ideas
Open to feedback

 

Table 3. Open-ness
Interestingly, the final two groupings of Protégé qualities were unique to
gender. In other words, both men cited one set of characteristics and both

women cited another. Both characteristic groupings were cited twice (Table 4)

 

 

 

 

Responsiveness Protégé Initiated
(Men identified) (Women Identified)
Acts on advice/ feedback “They call me”
Responsive, but autonomous “People come to me”

 

Table 4. Gender Specific Protégé Qualities
Of course, the above tables are simply ways of organizing the information
and thoughts of the participants. It would not be responsible to suggest that
because one quality was mentioned by a particular individual and not another,
that the quality might not be valued by all of the participants. But it is interesting
to note that both men seem to value a sense of activity- the ‘doing’ or productivity
of the relationship— and are connected to the outcomes of the relationship. In

contrast, the women in this dyad held strong value for the relationship itself
141

 

 

independent of its outcomes and were interested in ‘holding space.’ I suggest
that an appropriate way to describe this difference might be an emphasis on
doing versus being. Another way of looking at it is that for the men in this study,
the relation is also important, but the relation is ‘performed in the world’ and that
the development of the Protégé is seen as occurring through ‘doing together.’
For the women in this study, the relation is performed in the world through ‘being
together, or sharing space.’ There is some support in the literature that supports
this finding. (Humble, Richards, Solomon, Allen Blaisure & Johnson, 2006;
Mysyk, 2005). Once again, I do not organize the findings in this way for the sake
of generalizing outward to society at large, but rather to understand more deeply
some of the similarities within these mentoring dyads themselves. These
similarities may provide insights as to why these particular relationships have
been of long standing and with little reported conflict. The roles and expectations

of each party to the other seem to be congruous.

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CHAPTER 9
Divergences

Dissonance

Dissonance is a natural part of resonance. As mentioned earlier in this
document, resonance is comprised of the equal and opposite phenomena of both
consonance and dissonance. I conceived of dissonance as a sense of challenge,
foreign-ness, incongruence or incompatibility of any relation. Also dissonance
can occur potentially when there is a sense of something ‘missing’ from the
relation. It was noted earlier that an experience of professional dissonance for
both Canon and Tomas led them toward the resonance they perceived with Lisa
and Jan, which was the prelude to the relation. When dissonance is the primary
experience between individuals or institutions, it serves to repel. When held in
balance as within the field of resonance, that dissonance can provide enough
difference to be not only functional, but rich in its contrasting texture. Dissonance
provides information that is defining in nature highlighting what is not the same.
In this way, dissonance serves as another potential part of the amplification of
the self in relation. While we seek consonance or sameness initially, I believe
that we also seek to become aware of differences in an ongoing dynamic of self-
definition. It is a measure of the stability of the formed and established
relationship that individuals can take on the challenge of working in the
dissonances while maintaining the esteem of the relation. In this way, the formed
relation is ‘activated’ in its dynamic to contain the differences and allow them to
amplify both individuals. I feel that this ability to hold dissonance or difference

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within the field of resonance is critical to the longevity of the mentoring dyad.
Kram (1984) discusses a complex process of separation that occurs in mentoring
dyads that involves both psychological and structural factors. During this
dynamic time it is not uncommon for conflict to precipitate premature dyad
ruptures and disintegration. Indeed one of the challenges, as I see it, is in
negotiating that dynamic movement toward individuation (what my participants
have called the shifting from vertical to horizontal). This process of shifting from
the vertical to the horizontal can trigger projections and counter-transferences,
insecurities and dependencies. Mentors must be able to engage these dynamics
mindfully, understanding the nature of individuation and the functional role of
dissonance in the relation and simultaneously being sensitive to their own issues.
It seems to me that the burden for negotiating this time sits primarily with the
Mentor. Maturity, sensitivity, insight and a familiarity with negotiating cycles of
relationships are necessary Mentor qualities that help them successfully guide
this transition.

In this section I present and discuss differences within and between dyads.

Same Story, New Perspective

Earlier in this document, I suggest that in the early stages of the mentoring
relationships ‘sameness’ and ‘consonance’ between Protege and Mentor was an
important feature in the formation of the relation for these participants. As the
relation begins its ‘working’ phase or as Kram describes it, the ‘cultivation’ phase,
the potential exists for boundary making and the development of awareness

about ways in which members of the dyad are the same and in what ways they
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are different. Tomas mentions that he is more detail oriented than Jan, and that
he, in factworks with another man who thinks and processes information in more
similar ways to him than Jan. This does not diminish Jan’s importance for
Tomas. The two men share a similar way of negotiating the relationship- through
what Tomas describes as ‘regulation’ and this regulation involves proximity or
distance between them.

Canon and Lisa presented very symbiotic in many ways. The differences
between them were difficult to pull from them, though they may be more apparent
to the outsider. There were clear differences in age, life experience and status
between the two women, yet the qualities and characteristics shared by them
served to bond them together strongly. These shared experiences included
gender, the experience of being a mother, and the experience of being bi-cultural
in North America. Canon alluded to difference and separateness only
peripherally in her art as she described her sense of being completely separate
from Lisa leading to an understanding of a coexistence of sameness and
separateness being held in paradox, much like the gestating fetus is part of yet
separate from the mother. In the cases of both dyads, similarity was more
prevalent than difference. Alternately, the differences between individuals within
the intact dyads were not within the contexts in which the mentoring occurred.

There were, however, differences between dyads that bear noting. Some
of these have already been mentioned.

The ways in which both dyads are situated culturally and within the
institution of music therapy are quite different. Within the American music

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therapy institution, Canon and Lisa are marginalized both by their racial identities
and in their theoretical ideologies. They identify this marginalization as a factor in
their resonance. In contrast, Jan and Tomas seem to be in the center of the
Norwegian music therapy community, not on the fringes. They are the
trendsetters and occupy positions of privilege within their Universities and in their
professional communities.

From a feminist perspective, there are differences between the dyads that
may be attributed to gender differences. A prominent difference that has already
been articulated is the way in which both dyads negotiate proximity and
boundaries. Lisa and Canon operate with somewhat permeable boundaries that
shift depending on the institutional culture they are negotiating as a dyad. What
differentiation is present between them seems to be based on the roles they play
within those institutional cultures— and they both see these as illusory,
impermanent structures that do not reflect the reality of their connection. They
describe their relationship as more of a meeting of souls. There is a strong
preference within this dyad for referencing maternal and women’s metaphors
characterized by the sense of ‘being’ and ‘sharing space’ as fundamental to the
relationship.

In contrast, clear boundaries were present in the stories of Jan and
Tomas. The mentoring functions were occupationally focused on professional
writing and academics and did not expand to include many personal areas,
though both men identify themselves now as friends. Given the length of their
association, the identification of friendship would seem to be consistent with

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Kram’s final phase of Mentoring that she calls Redefinition. In this phase, the
partners in the relation define themselves as friends- though as we see in the
case of Jan and Tomas, the Mentor continues to be revered as a significant
player in the development of the Protégé. There is a strong preference within this
dyad for referencing ‘work’ metaphors characterized by the sense of ‘doing’ and
‘activity’ as being foundational to the relationship.

Between the Mentors themselves, Lisa and Jan shared a similarity in that
they did not experience levels or hierarchy in the same ways their Protégés did.
Yet, in the negative space it is important to note that while Tomas has certainly
come to be a ‘colleague’ for Jan, with an extremely prominent career that could
be seen as rivaling the elder man’s (though only Jan suggests that he will one
day be Tomas’ student), the same could not be said for Canon and Lisa. Has
Canon truly become Lisa’s equal professionally? Lisa and Canon do not speak of
this kind of dynamic taking place for them, and the two women are on very
different professional tracks. The relationship between Canon and Lisa has not
had to weather what might be construed as professional competition. Only Jan
in his role as Mentor to Tomas has experienced the dynamic shifting between
vertical and horizontal. As an admirer of both Jan and Lisa, I must say that I feel
these two people have no equals, but the challenge of helping a Protégé become
(arguably) more important than himself has been all Jan’s. I feel that his humility
and focus on his own continued development has given him a kind of

detachment that allows for development in others. Jan clearly states that he has

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never viewed Tomas’ work as a competition but as an alternative, an extension
or an elaboration. He mentions the idea of competition specifically,

Of course, if I hadn’t published and if my student published before
me, that would probably be a little threatening, but since I have so much
recognition at the international community of music therapy, I feel it is
really important to reach out from that...so I am really thankful that there is
a person like Tomas.

And Tomas offers this reflection that is similar to Jan’s,

Norwegians...(he sighs slightly and pauses)...he tries and I try. So
we don’t talk very, very much or very personal, so its like things are said
like in just a few words. Like sometimes, even indirectly, but he said
something like he had been feeling a little bit alone about writing about
music therapy so that me writing this kind of text kind of encouraged him
and encouraged him to write more about music therapy— because he had
been writing about other things in the late 80’s.

Reciprocity was an early feature of this relationship. Jan seemed

most able to appreciate the camaraderie of a peer.

Negative Space

Within the category of Divergences or Dissonance I include a concept that
I call Negative Space. As mentioned previously, negative space in this context
refers to that which is conspicuous by its absence and functions to allow
phenomena to stand out in relief against it. Negative space is often referred to
as the space that surrounds the subject of a painting. If a painter is able to work
from the negative space or the space around the subject, he or she is often able
to capture details of the subject that could be overlooked. Including negative

space can offer a more complete treatment of phenomena.

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I begin this exploration of negative space phenomena by noticing who was
not included in the study. Earlier in this document, I mentioned that I spent over
a year developing the research design for this study. I experimented with
questions through focus group research and talked about my interest in
mentoring to many people. Doing this helped me delimit my study and also
illuminated complexities and potential problems that had heretofore been
unanticipated. By making a commitment to what constituted ‘good’ mentoring, l
effectively eliminated the possibility of exploring the shadow side or negative
aspects of the relationship. I heard many stories from music therapists that
indicated to me that stories of ‘shadow mentoring relationships’ were not
uncommon in our field. Some therapists even shared stories of abuse, unethical
behavior and exploitation- not only from the direction of mentor to protégé but
also the converse. I heard stories of this type from both same and mixed gender
dyads. Obviously, these relationships were not of long standing and many of
them resulted in damaging ruptures. The difficulties I experienced in finding
dyads who felt that their experiences in mentoring had been both long-term and
beneficial to both parties were actually not as common as their damaging
counterparts. While I made a choice and a commitment to explore ‘goodness’
based on a desire to co-construct knowledge of positive traits and characteristics,
I made a personal commitment at that time to not ignore the ‘dark side’ or
potential dark sides of these relationships. Feminist and Critical methodologies
seek to create balance in the literature by offering equal and opposite
perspectives. I hope to include such a perspective here. From my selection

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process, I learned that relationships such as Lisa and Canon’s and Tomas and
Jan’s are somewhat uncommon. Lisa and Jan provide interesting and inspiring
models to learn from. Knowing stories of dysfunctional mentoring relationships
leads me to the knowledge that being able to hold the protégé in mind with
equanimity and a particular state of consciousness as Lisa and Jan have done is
a rare thing. While it is tempting to think of this mentor quality as simply ‘nice’ or
idiosyncratic to these two Mentors as individuals, I believe that it requires
tremendous personal insight and courage on the part of the Mentor to face their
own motivations, needs and to work in their counter-transferences. Both Lisa
and Jan have been in the field for a long time and are skilled therapists. Both
use their own resonance to become aware of what they bring to the therapeutic
setting. Although the mentoring relationship is not a therapeutic one, Mentors
will bring all of their skills to the table in any relationship they enter into. Both
Lisa and Jan have coached and supervised many students through their training
and have, learned from those experiences as well. Knowing this, I am aware of
how critical it is for a teacher, supervisor, mentor to take in mis-takes or mis-
steps in relationships with students or protégés and learn from them. I believe
that Jan and Lisa have done this and it allows them great clarity and the wisdom
of which Tomas speaks. Mixed gender dyads and those relationships that did
not survive the dynamic shift from vertical to horizontal provide us with important
knowledge about potential conflicts and pivotal moments and challenges within

the life of the relationship.

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The missing mixed-gender dyad is another important feature within the
negative space. It is interesting to me that this proved so difficult to find. It is
possible that I simply was not in contact with the right people. I did speak with
several individuals who I would consider to be very prominent Mentors in our
field. They gave me names of other individuals that they felt had been mentored
or that they continued to mentor that were of a different gender. In every case,
the protégé denied having that kind of relationship with the other person. I agree
with Crutcher (2007) who presents cautionary findings about mixed gender and
mixed race or cultural dyads. I understand that in some contexts, gender may
not play as prominent a role, yet there is such potential for dissonance present
that the relation would need to be very explicit about the psychological, cultural
and political waters they were navigating. This has implications in the related
tasks of supervision as well.

In addition to the absence of the mixed gender dyad and the dysfunctional
relationship, I also consider the lack of major conflict in the relationship between
these mentoring dyads to be negative space phenomena. Although Tomas
admits to having recently experienced a minor frustration with Jan as a
colleague, neither man reports experiencing conflict in the relationship. The
same is true of Lisa and Canon. From a critical point of view, this is hard to
understand, as it is commonly believed that all relationships contain some
measure of conflict. It is hard to imagine two relationships of 20 or more year’s
duration not having had some measure of conflict to work through. Nevertheless,
the participants deny the existence of conflict in these relationships and I must,

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therefore, include this as part of negative space phenomena. Though there may
be many possible explanations for this, I propose that the absence of conflict is
related to the ways in which both dyads regulate proximity. In reflecting on this, I
am reminded of Winnicott’s theoretical construct of the ‘good enough’ parent
(1960). I think of the proximity between Jan and Tomas and Lisa and Canon as
being ‘close enough.’ Close enough to be functional and resonant- to have
meaning for both parties, but not so close as to be ovenlvhelming or enmeshed.
Tomas alluded to this separateness as he spoke of regulating the inter-relation
by being more or less in contact, and through his use of the metaphor of
chopping wood with his sons. His metaphor led to my image of trees in a forest.
Growing too close together will stunt the growth of both. ‘Enough’ space needs
to exist between the trees to allow for their full growth and development. Canon
and Lisa seem, on the surface and as evidenced by their drawn images to be
potentially more enmeshed. But they each acknowledge that while they share a
space, it is a large enough space for both to occupy. Canon reflects,” We get to
share a lot of space together because it is not just about what we call the reality
here but also our dreaming.” Furthermore, women’s ways of knowing informs us
that women can sustain closer proximities with other women. It is, in fact,
necessary to learning. As my cognitive processes often form an image before
the cognitive construct can be put into words, I had an image of ‘close enough’
that emerged from my reflection on this aspect of negative space. This image is
of two magnets. ‘Close enough’ would be the place where one begins to feel the

pull to merge, but will still be able to hold the space between and not collapse

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into oneness. There is a tension to holding that distance and both parties must

be in agreement to that space being held.

Negative Space Recapitulation

This Portrait of mentoring relationships between music therapists is set
into relief by the presence of negative space phenomena such as: ‘shadow’
relationships not included in the study, the absence of the mixed gender dyad
and the absence of conflict. Through this lens of negative space, the reader can
recognize and appreciate the challenges and skills of the participants more fully,
and conceive of a sense of ‘close enough’ proximity as a necessary condition of

interpersonal resonance.

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CHAPTER 10

Reverberation and Interpretive Discussion

Earlier in this document, I describe reverberation as an experience of
consonance or dissonance that seems to persist long after its moment of impact.
Like abstract art themes of magnification, intensification and perspective
(Marshall, 2007), reverberation can be experienced as an intensification or
prolongation of resonance. I experienced the emergence of thematic material
(consonances and dissonances) through the iterative cycles of rumination and
writing as reverberation. My attention was drawn persistently to particular
themes, as they seemed to jump from within the interview transcripts. Lawrence-
Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis describe the empirical process of interpretation as a
cognitive activity involving “recognizing, sorting, and organizing perceptions
toward a cohesive construction of understanding.” (pg. 30) They also refer to this
as an active search for connections and coherence. My interpretation of
Portraiture weaves together the verbatim words of the research participants with
the organizing world-view of the Portraitist and is presented in such a way as
integrates analysis and reflection into the Portraits themselves as a means of
presentation or exhibition. Not unlike abstract art, particular aspects of the
stories of these two mentoring dyads persist and are intensified through the
Portraitist’s hand.

In this ‘reverberation’ of themes, the focus now moves outward, like the

outer ripples on a pond, or like the experience of stepping away from a portrait in

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a gallery, where the details will merge together toward a broader sense of form,
color and subject. -

I perceive the themes of this study to exist on separate but related axes.
One axis is the Axis of Experience. By this, I refer to the relational experience
and its unfolding and development over time between the members of the
relation. The second axis is the Axis of Qualities. By this, I refer to Mentor and
Protégé qualities that were both attractive and functional for the dyad, as well as
the qualities of the relations themselves that contributed to their longevity and

functionality.

The Axis of Experience

The Search for Resonance

The first primary theme to arrive from within these data is the theme of
Resonance as a determinant of the relation between these music therapists.
Among these participants, it was the potential Protégé to first recognize
resonance between him or herself and the potential Mentor. This recognition or
awareness of a perceived consonance with the potential Mentor led these
Protégé’s to seek proximity with the potential Mentor. Resonance was first

recognized through the potential Mentor’s work.

Discursive Point 1
This is a pre-relatlonal phase that is not addressed in the mentoring
literature. It seems that for these music therapists, there is a condition or set of

conditions existent within the consciousness of the potential Protege that may or
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may not be related to transition and change. What are the conditions in our lives
that provoke us toward a particular book, presentation, or worldview? In Canon’s
case, there was a general sense of dissonance with the field of music therapy as
it was interpreted in the United States in the 1970’s. In Tomas’ case, it was an
ambivalence about therapy in general and a specific (if at that time vague) notion
that music could be channeled through his social values to benefit society at
large. In my own life, transformation has been directly linked to discontent or
discomfort with the existing structures in my life, propelling me toward ideas or
people who were pursuing similar questions.

As these conditions are persisting within the potential Protégé, the
potential Mentors appear to be ‘getting on with their lives’- or actively engaging in
the act of being themselves professionally. Both Lisa and Jan seemed to be
authentically pursuing their interests, following the impulse of the work as it was
growing within their practices, fulfilling themselves in their work. These
fulfillments took the form of published works, presentations, talks,
demonstrations, professional service, teaching etc. This is an important insight
to me and I think a feature of these self-selected relationships, and that is that
the relationships are based on attraction, each individual pursuing their work with
an authenticity- responding to opportunities to deepen their experiences.

Lisa mentions that it is important that the Protégé ‘calls her’- or initiates
the contact. This seems to imply that the potential Mentors are not seeking out
opportunities to mentor, but rather deeply involved in the actions of authentic

engagement with their work. There are, of course, activities within our profession

156

that increase the probability that potential Protégés will seek proximity: teaching,
writing, publishing, supervising, presenting, being involved in professional
service, among others; anything that increases the visibility of the senior
therapist. What I have learned through engaging this research process is that
whatever I choose to do to actively express myself professionally should be
motivated by an integrity and authenticity. Sometimes individuals are motivated
toward certain activities because they feel they ‘should’ or because their
predecessor in a position did a particular thing, or because they may make a little
more money for performing some other activity. The stories of these dyads lead
me to believe that it is actually important to the longevity of our field to be
authentically engaged in the professional activities that are most fulfilling for us,
rather than taking on opportunities and services that are not particularly resonant
out of obligation or ambition. Will potential Protégés be attracted to what is
authentic in us, or to a projection? Or worse, to a shadow aspect of our selves
that is operating for an unconscious reason? Though I did not pursue an
understanding of negative mentoring relationships, I believe that this must

account for some of the problems experienced within negative relationships.

Responding to the call...Resonancel Resonating

Once the prospective Protege increased proximity to the potential Mentor,
the Mentor is then moved to acknowledge and respond to the potential Protégé.

At different times, both Lisa and Jan began to experience a ‘call’ to pay

attention to the Protégé, whose work stood out as having unique potential. It

157

would seem that to differing degrees, both parties perceived a positive
resonance,orconsonance.

Lisa and Jan noticed and valued similarities between Canon and Tomas
and themselves. Some of those similarities involved worldview and culture.
Gender was perhaps a more unconscious similarity but I believe contributed to
an overall sense of ‘sameness’ that served to allow for recognition of a
consonance between the parties. Furthermore, Lisa and Jan also noticed and
valued certain qualities in Canon and Tomas and these became part of a
pervasive sense of ‘potential.’ These qualities included being intellectually adept,
open to new ideas and a willingness to be responsive to feedback and

suggesfions.

Discursive Point 2

In Figure 5, there is an arrow (indicating a process) between resonance
and amplification and between those two features, are the equal and opposite
phenomena of consonance and dissonance. From the stones of these two
relationships, I am persuaded to believe that the perception of the interpersonal
consonance between potential Mentor and Protégé actually enabled a sense of
amplification that contributed to the formation of the relation. The relations in
these cases experience resonance moving in two directions. It is not totally
reciprocal at the early stages of the relationships. It is possible that the degree of
felt energy between the members of the dyad might have been initially weighted
with the Protege, but as soon as the Mentor recognizes the resonance him or

The Relational Experience
158

Interpersonal Resonance

Consonance H Dissonance

Amplification

l

Reverberation

Harmonic Not Harmonic
Functional Dysfunctional
Mutually Beneficial Ruptures

Figure 2
Diagram of Emergent Themes l- The Relational Experience

159

herself and as soon as the terms and structures of the relationship are
articulated, the weight of felt energy evens out and weighs toward the Mentor as
s/he begins to hold the Protégé in mind with a particular state of consciousness
that is unique within the spectrum of other relationships.

What is happening within the Mentor at this time that recognizes the
Protégé as one with potential? Allen, Poteet, and Burrows (1997) suggest that
positive self-reflection is a primary motivator in that mentor recognition. As I
reflect on this possibility for the participants of this research, I notice that both
Lisa and Canon and Jan and Tomas had very similar things to say about one
another. Lisa noticed and recognized qualities in Canon that Canon identified as
important to her. Jan identified qualities in Tomas that Tomas felt were
significant qualities in Jan that met his needs for a Mentor. Jan and Tomas
seemed to experience a lesser degree of ‘sameness’ than Lisa and Canon, but
there seemed to be enough similarity to create a fertile field for interpersonal
growth...including how the relationship is regulated. The degree to which
positive self-reflection played a role in the attractiveness from Mentor to Protégé
is uncertain. That being said, the Mentors and Protégés did seem to be
experience elements of self-reflection in the felt resonance in their relationship.

My experience of this feature of the resonance can be conceived of as a

theoretical construct:

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The Other is Felt as an Amplifier of the Self

Mentor Protege

   

       
 

  
     

The Fully The Fully

 

 

Actualized ‘ Realized
Self /Imagined
> Self
Potential for Legacy What I want to Say
Potential for Progeny What I want to Do
What Can I Contribute? How I want to Work
Potential for Community Who I can be

Figure 3
Diagram of Emergent Themes II

This diagram indicates the nature of the amplification that can occur within
the resonance between Protégé and Mentor. For the Protégé, the Mentor
represents themselves fully realized... the imagined self. The Mentor can
embody the imagined voice of the Protégé...saying things or writing things in a
way that is inspiring to the Protégé. The feeling of “that is what I want to say-
that is how I would like to be able to say it.” The Mentor can serve as a life
model of what might be possible for a junior person in the field. The feeling of, “I
would like to teach, or write, or have a private practice like that.” The Mentor
serves as a role model of what it means to work in music therapy. The feeling of,
“ I want to play like that, I want to interact with clients in this way.” And the

Mentor can serve as a mirror of the Protégé’s own potential. Through the

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Mentor’s particular state of consciousness, through their positive statements and
constructive feedback, the Mentor teaches the Protégé to believe in themselves.
The feeling of, “This is who I can be, this is who I am.” I began this work with a

quote from a children’s song, sung by “Elmo”,

If just one person believes in you,
Deep enough, and strong enough, believes in you...

Hard enough, and long enough...
It stands to reason that you yourself will
Start to see what everybody sees in
You...
And maybe even you,
Can believe in you... too!

This is a critical mentoring function within the psychosocial domain.

For the Mentor, the Protégé can represent the Mentor fully actualized.
One’s life has come full circle when one is able to give back. The Mentor
recognizes that they have had an impact, that they have a unique perspective to
offer in a relationship with a junior member of the profession. In the Protégé, a
Mentor can see the potential for a legacy of their work. The feeling of, “ I can
leave the profession, or my job, when I know that there are good people to carry
it on.” More specifically, the Mentor can view his or her Protégés as progeny.
Jan mentions this specifically when he refers to raising a generation of music
therapists. If the Protégé projects parental functions on the Mentor, the Mentor in
turn projects images of progeny toward the Protégé. It is the feeling of, “This

person is a part of me...their own person...but a part of what I leave to the

profession.” The Mentor can also resonate with the Protégé from the place of

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giving back. The feeling of, “This is what I can contribute to the future of our
profession. Finally, the Mentor can resonate with the Protégé from a position of
building a community of like-minded individuals. The Mentor can feel a sense
that the Protégé ‘gets them’, understands their point of view and resonates with
them. Lisa spoke of being marginalized in the profession. Tomas reflected that
the profession is ‘difficult’ and that if one does not have strong motivation, he is
afraid that individuals will not ‘make it.’ There is an isolating quality to the work of
senior therapists and potential Mentors. Lisa and Jan are particularly
independent thinkers and have stepped out on limbs. For these Mentors, it must
feel important to create a unique sub-community from among the larger music
therapy community. These sub-communities exist as acknowledged groups:
Nordoff Robbins Music Therapists, Guided Imagery and Music Fellows,
Neurological Music Therapy trained individuals. Yet, many Mentors do not wish
for large followings, but rather are content with a few people who ‘get them’, or
who understand their work and appreciate their work; a small group of people
with whom they can talk and exchange ideas. The Protégé holds this potential
for the Mentor and the greater the degree of felt resonance, the more hopefully
that potential is held.

I propose that this initial resonance and amplification can be seen as a

foundational interpersonal action that actually serves to form the relationship.

Developmental Phases of the Relationship
For Lisa and Canon and Jan and Tomas there seemed to be distinctive

phases to their relationships, though they were slightly different. For both, there
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was a pre-relation where resonance was felt and recognized, where proximity
was sought and obtained and where the Mentors became aware of the Protégés
and began to hold them in a particular state of consciousness that held potential
for the mentoring relationship. The relationships differed concerning the working
styles of each and to what degree the relationships were outcome oriented. Lisa
and Canon’s reflections seemed to suggest a sense of development by ‘being
with’ and Jan and Tomas’ reflections seemed to suggest a sense of development
through ‘doing together.’ The working phase of Lisa and Canon’s relationship
occurred within the structure of the academic setting- though it was not limited to
that. Jan and Tomas’s relationship was formed through Tomas’ attraction and
proximity within the academic setting, but did not develop into a working
mentorship until later, when they worked together to form a music therapy
training program in another part of Nonrvay, and the relationship has continued to

develop through the writing of texts (published articles and books).

Discursive Point 3

From these data provided by these participants, it seems that their
experience of mentoring and being mentored continue to support Kram’s
developmental phases (1983). Initiation, Cultivation and Redefinition also
characterize the experiences of these research participants. My question was
really about whether or not music therapists mentor differently from other
professions and it would seem on the surface that it is not the case. I do think
that being aware of oneself as a musical being, indeed, as music itself may

influence whom we choose as Mentors and Protégés. Being music
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interpersonally, when one is aware of it, may influence how Mentors listen and
respond to Protégés. Knowing the style of music we are... are we pre-
composed, note-for note musical beings? Are we improvisational, existential
musical beings? Are we meditative, complex ragas whose repetition and ‘being
with’ is transformative? I think that there may be styles of being musical that
influence our ways of being with others, client relationships as well as mentoring
relationships.

Kram’s developmental phases seem to be to be archetypal. Indeed, the
great round of the Mandala (Jung, 1973; Kellogg, 2002) indicate that there are
archetypal patterns available to us and all of life that begin with emptiness, move
from generativity through individuation to community, continues on to
disintegration and back to emptiness again. Kram’s phases are not really
different from this archetypal view of process. What is intriguing about Lisa and
Canon and Jan and Tomas’ relationships has to do with how they have
negotiated the dynamic movement between vertical and horizontal.

The mentoring relationship is further activated and amplified as the
Protégé grows in independence and prominence and the dynamics of the
relationship begin to pivot from the vertical to the horizontal axis. Both Protégés
in this study moved gracefully into their independence apparently without conflict,
crisis or rupture of the mentoring relationship. I feel that this was largely due to
the consciousness of the Mentors. The fact that neither Jan nor Lisa viewed the
Protégé in a subordinate position and the fact that for the most part the
relationships were free of stereotypical power hierarchies contributed to this.

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Another possible factor that contributed to the smoothness of this movement may
have had to do with what I refer to as ‘close-enough’ proximity. It does not seem
as though either Mentor was narcissistically invested in the Protégé. Neither
dyad reported negative transference and counter transference experiences,
though I imagine these do happen. Another factor to consider is that both
Protégé’s continue to hold the (former) Mentor in high esteem. The dynamic
feels (to an outsider like myself) as if the Mentor holds a consciousness of the
horizontal quality of the relationship and the Protege holds the vertical-
regardless of their prominence. This is reminiscent of eastern teacher/student
relationships, where regardless of age and prominence, the teacher is held and
maintained in the highest regard by the former student. Indeed, prominent
teachers cite the lineage of their particular tradition, placing themselves as

perennial students.

The Axis of Qualities

As the axis of experience refers to the experience of being and developing
in mentoring relationships, so the axis of qualities refers to Mentor and Protégé
qualities that were both attractive and functional for the dyad, as well as the
qualities of the relations themselves that contributed to their longevity and
functionality. Some of the qualities of the relations have been discussed
previously. The first prominent quality along this axis of thematic material I call

the ideal professional parent.

The Ideal Professional Parent

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Both dyads made reference to the Mentor being seen as an ideal
professional parent. This parenting function corresponds to other models in the
literature, namely Kram’s (1983) in which Mentors are seen as individuals who
negotiate and cultivate environments to be favorable growth environments for the
Protégés. Protégés feel protected and nurtured in ways that are different based
on culture, institution and gender. Mentors alternately experience Protégés as
progeny or family- with the potential for carrying on the legacy of their influence.
This is not to be confused with the concept of progeny in scientific research-
where generations of Protégés perpetuate the Mentor’s actual work. Between
these music therapists, there is no question that the work to be carried on

belongs solely to the Protégé.

Discursive Point 4

Both Protégés in this study referenced parental metaphors when
discussing their relationships with their Mentors. Canon’s images were
specifically gestational both in her language and in her drawings. Tomas
referenced his own experiences as both a son and a father when describing
qualities of his relationship with Jan. Clearly, this is an area where similarity of
style is a very influential factor in the longevity of the relationship. There are
many different kinds of mothers and fathers; many ways of parenting. There are
styles that work between people and styles that do not work between people.
Were these dyads just lucky or did they actively choose people who were
stylistically similar? There is no way of knowing the answer to that. What is

helpful for a potential Mentor to consider as they move into relationships with
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potential Protégés is they ways in which parenting worked for them, and the
ways in which parenting did not work for them- both as a child and as a parent.
The parental transference and counter-transference is a common phenomenon
in therapeutic, supervisory and educational settings. Clearly, the mentoring
relationship holds that potential as well. From a personal perspective, I am
aware of feeling weighed down by very dependent students. I perceive this as a
parental counter-transference. I do not think that resonance would develop for
me with a very dependent Protégé. Tomas feels the same. He expressed
concern that his Mentors not feel as though they had to take care of him, and
independence and autonomous thinking is a very important quality in a potential
Protégé, for him. As a person who is interested in becoming a better Mentor, it is
an important point of learning to recognize the role of parental influences in these

relationships and to be alert to the projection.

‘Close-enough’ space

The Mentoring relationships between these dyads seem to be regulated
through what I call “close enough’ proximity that allows for ongoing autonomy and
growth. This maintenance of proximity through ‘close—enough’ contact can be
represented in the second building block in the interdependent triangle model
that is called ‘maintaining.’

During the activated or working phase of the relationship, Mentors employ
a variety of approaches in their work with the Protégé. Within this qualitative
theme the sub-themes Sword made of Clouds and Like Chopping Wood

emerged.
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Discursive Point 5

Close-enough proximity enables boundaries and negotiated contracts to
be established between the participants of the relationship. In the sub-theme
represented by the metaphor Sword made of Clouds, Lisa is really referring to
what I call a sacred contract of care and honesty and a commitment to hold the
Protégé to the standard to which they aspire. I specifically refer to this quality of
mentoring in my acknowledging poem at the beginning of this document,

You believe in me fiercely, stubbornly, and I rise higher that I would
have imagined; not because you tell me so with vacant praise but because
you hold me to a standard that I hold only in hopeful shadow, not daring to
own for myself.

As I see it, the Mentor must be wise enough and expansive enough to
hold the Protégé in the paradox between who they are and who they are
becoming.

Even when boundaries and outcomes are not explicitly negotiated, it
would seem that they are tacitly agreed upon between Mentor and Protégé. Lisa
and Canon offer us an example of a very close proximity relationship where the
roles were negotiated in a tacit manner...probably aided to a certain extent by
the external structures they were functioning within (however vehemently they
denied them). Those external structures provided a tacit container with agreed
upon roles and agreed upon outcomes (the degree program). Their sacred
contract was a different level of agreement. My sense of their experience is that
in contracting spiritually with Canon, Lisa offered access to herself and to her

consciousness to benefit Canon. Canon contracted spiritually to make herself
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authentically vulnerable and open to Lisa’s guidance, engaging the forward
nudging in an open and non-defensive manner. There was tacit trust evident in
both dyads, and trust by definition can exist only in the presence of risk.

The metaphor of sword made of clouds indicates an agreement to tell the
truth with knowledge and compassion for the person one is speaking with. I
teach a short unit on conflict resolution to our local music therapy interns three
times a year. One of the favored catch phrases of conflict resolution is, “Be

tough on the problem, soft on the person.” Sword made of Clouds.

Discursive Point 6

Like chopping wood; this persistent image of strength and space reminds
me of the structure of a house. I am certain that Tomas never imagined that this
image would hold as much meaning for me as it has over the years since our
interview. But it is a powerful image of regulation, communication, inter-relation,
productivity and collaboration. Maybe it is because I have chopped wood and
remember what it is like to work that hard for that long. How after a while the
shorthand of gesture takes over for words and how you are too tired to talk about
what you are doing anyway. You know that if your partner turns to the left, that
he will get that log, and you should go to the right to get the next one, or to stand
back as a tree is set to fall. I know that there is a quality to the silence with which
my Mentor listens to me when she is thinking that I am really off the mark and it
is different from the silence that tells me she is listening compassionately. I
actually know much of what she will say before she says it, her voice is that

internalized in me. But I like it when she says it all the same. And to be honest,
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we don’t talk about the relationship either, as Tomas and Jan don’t talk about
their relationship. There is a quality that Jan and Tomas exemplify for me that is
reflected in this metaphor and that has something to do with the strength and
maturity of space in a relationship. Once again, this would not work if one or the
other of these men had a stronger need for closeness than another. This aspect
of their resonance is very important and provides another point of knowledge:
that positive and long standing mentoring relationships are negotiated around
issues of communication, relationship and proximity. Degree of closeness
seems to be idiosyncratic to dyads. Self— knowledge seems to be critical here as
well. The negotiation between Mentor and Protégé can again be verbal,
nonverbal or tacit. My learning is to make agreements about proximity and

access clear, for myself and for the other person.

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CHAPTER 11
Contemplation:
Implications, Limitations and Possibilities

I have described Mentoring as a developmental relationship between
junior and senior individuals within professions and organizations. They are
potent interpersonal processes that evolve over time and hold potential for
growth or for rupture and disintegration. The purpose of these relationships can
vary depending on the situation but what they have in common is the aim of
furthering growth and development of the Protégé. The purpose of this research
is very personal. Through studying the worldviews, practices, qualities and ways
of being of exemplary teacher/mentors in my field, I hoped to understand and
develop qualities within myself that could serve the next generation of music
therapy professionals.

In the process of pursuing this research (which has taken several years), I
learned a great deal about mentoring. Firstly, I learned to distinguish between
mentoring and clinical supervision. There is a qualitative difference between the
two functions. The role of the clinical supervisor is to oversee clinical work and
the development of clinical skills. The clinical supervisor has mixed loyalties in
the sense that s/he is responsible to the agency for which they work. S/he also
holds an ethical responsibility to the clients receiving therapy from the student or
intern. And then the supervisor is responsible to the student/intern last. The
supervisor’s role includes clinical education, socialization to the profession and

ensuring the safety of clients. Clinical supervision usually takes place over a

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finite and limited time frame and assessment and evaluation of the performance
of the student/intern is the ultimate outcome of the relationship (Merrill, 2004,
2007). Through this research process, I have learned that the Mentor’s role is
very different. The Mentor’s first responsibility is to the Protégé and his or her
development and to the achievement of the Protégé’s goals. The Mentor’s areas
of concern are broader than those of the clinical supervisor and include
occupational and psychosocial domains. Mentoring relationships tend to be of
longer duration, often greater than two years. Spontaneously forming
relationships tend to last longer than those that are structured. This is not
surprising when one considers the role of interpersonal resonance.

I came to this research process with an intention to explore and
understand whatever I might be able to understand about the qualities of positive
mentoring relationships through the inspiration of skilled and exemplary
participants. I hoped that even considering the differences between mentoring
and supervision, that I would learn more about how each of those roles would
unfold and inform one another in my own lived experience as an educator,
clinical supervisor and Mentor. I have learned much from all four participants,
but in particular, I have learned about holding an open psychological field for my
students...especially those with whom I do not share a natural resonance, that
allows for their unfolding. l have learned to seek the places of resonance so that
we might find a common ground on which to work together. I continue to learn
what it means in practice to hold a sword made of clouds. And I continue to learn

to regulate each relationship uniquely. l have learned that it is the Protégé who

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calls the Mentor, not the other way around. I have learned that it is OK to not
work well with everyone, that relationships are idiosyncratic to a great degree. I
have learned that sometimes development happens simply by ‘being with’ rather
than ‘doing with.’ I have learned that roles are ephemeral and temporary and l
have especially learned to embrace the parental transference.

I think that this research: the stories and Portraits of Jan and Tomas and
Lisa and Canon can offer much to readers. Like an exhibition, the meaning will
be negotiated individually, but for me, the Portraits have created a scaffold
whereby Lisa and Jan become models for working with others.

These Portraits also serve music therapy as a profession. As we who
comprise subsequent generations of music therapists begin to move toward
prominence, it is time to synthesize and integrate the wisdom that the more
senior generation offer us. These pioneers have much to teach us through their
lives and stories. The music therapy profession is really at a place in our
development where we now have elders to mentor others. Those of us taking
the mantle as educators and clinicians need to learn from the wisdom of these
elders in the profession. These Portraits serve to step inside the minds and
hearts of two extraordinary professional elders, and they share their inner
workings and motivations in a way that their edited works cannot.

When conceiving and designing this study, the researcher in me had
hoped to offer a new perspective on mentoring for music therapists and sought to
influence practice through the inspiration of these exemplary participants. I
envisioned a generalizability of inspiration. I have definitely experienced that

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outcome personally and imagine that others will feel the same way. I feel that
the Portraiture methodology is a good fit for arts based therapies because it
resonates with the creative worldview that music therapists live in. It offers us
thick and nuanced description of phenomena that is focused on ‘goodness’
without ignoring shadow and negative space. Portraiture is a collaborative form
of inquiry in the sense that meaning is negotiated between the Portraitist and the
reader, and that is another resonance with music therapy. Its ability to move
deeply inside phenomena offers a unique opportunity to study human inter
relations. This study also serves the Portraiture methodological literature itself,
offering music-centered language and perspectives for the processes of the
methodology and offering up new approaches to performance of findings through
my connection to abstract art concepts of intensification, magnification and
perspective. Another benefit to this methodology is that it constructs knowledge
in a way that is engaging to read, welcoming and open to readers and reader
interpretation. It does not use language or numbers to keep readers at arms
length from the experience of interpretation, but rather invites them in to
participate in the creation cf new perspectives.

Finally, these new perspectives on mentoring address a gap in the music
therapy literature and have the potential to influence music therapy education.
Additionally, the theoretical constructs presented have the potential to inform the
larger body of literature on mentoring through a deeper understanding of the
musicality of human relations- particularly the concepts connected to
interpersonal resonance.

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A deeper understanding of the nuances of mentoring for both Protégé and
Mentor can serve to free educators and music therapy clinical supervisors from
feeling the pressure to take on Mentor functions and more fully embrace their
role as a supervisor that, by definition and function includes assessment and
evaluation. Having this kind of clarity may also serve to address what
Manathunga (2007) describes as the dishonest promotion of mentoring as value-
free when it is actually a veiled attempt at masking the supervisory relationship.
The supervisory relationship can be seen as an interpersonal environment that
holds potential for future development into a Mentoring relationship once the
evaluative component has been completed.

A deeper understanding of mentoring will enhance Mentor sensitivity to
the complexities inherent in their role and could promote greater awareness of
the ethical implications of the relationship.

Finally, it is my hope that fostering a deeper understanding of mentoring
will encourage potential Protégés to reach out to their exemplars and models, to
seek proximity and to extend the ‘call.’ I hope that potential Mentors will respond

to the call and begin the enriching path of mentoring others.

Limitations

While this study contributes significantly to an area of the music therapy
profession that has been underrepresented in the research literature, there are
also limitations to it. Though I disagree with those critics of Portraiture who

suggest that only the voice of the Portraitist is illuminated through this method,

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not that of the participants (English, 2000), it is true that the breadth and scope of
the portraits are by definition interpreted through my personal lens. I have striven
to keep my lens as transparent as possible through self-examination and
member checking processes, but my choice to explore only positive relationships
eliminates exploring what goes wrong in these situations. As this research
represents a beginning place, I do recommend exploring the alternate condition
(negative experiences in mentoring and being mentored) in future research
endeavors. I do recommend, however, that such research be undertaken with
caution. I spent a great deal of time considering the goals and potential
outcomes of my research, and that process determined the focus. Research
processes toward negative experiences can further damage relationships and/or
potentially re-traumatize wounded individuals. The value of the outcomes of
such an inquiry would need to be considered in light of the potential harm to
participants.

I also think that it would be incorrect to assume that because Lisa and Jan
appeared to employ similar ways of being at times, that all exemplary mentors
are like them or should be like them. I do not assume that is the case, but rather
that the over arching theme of interpersonal resonance is most central to
effectiveness and that individuals with various personal styles will attract and be
attracted to persons with whom there is a potential for resonance. The openness
with which Lisa and Jan hold the working phases of the mentoring relationship is
no doubt idiosyncratic to them as was the salient negotiation of proximity and

access they employed with their Protégés. I am convinced that however these

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negotiations take place, they do need to take place in order for the mentoring
relationship to stay healthy and effective. In this way, the method of regulating
that space will be individual and this research does not attempt to generalize that
to others. Readers hoping for a ‘paint by numbers’ approach to mentoring will be
disappointed by this research. Hopefully, readers with this intention will be
inspired to develop their own way of mentoring albeit inspired by these portraits.

The depth and detail inherent in this methodology and the fact that l
engaged this process as a single researcher, necessarily limited the number of
dyads that could be included in the study. Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-
Davis suggest that they, in fact, use teams to conduct their work in Portraiture. I
think that one benefit to the practice of using a team has to do with triangulation
and rigor. l have attempted to use the literature as a source of triangulation and I
employed member checking as another source of triangulation. This is a
legitimate approach and adds depth to the study. A team would have added that
much more to this, yet very few researchers have the kind of institutional support
and funding that Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman-Davis enjoy. Another benefit
to the use of a team is that the sheer person—power of multiple researchers would
enable the inclusion and interpretation of more dyads. Further, I believe that
having research partners would increase the perspectives or facets through
which to experience these phenomena. If funding could be procured for a topic
such as this, I believe that a team approach could certainly enhance the

knowledge generated from within these processes.

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I

Finally, the member checking process was very illuminating to me. It is an
important process that reinforced for me the notion that though the researcher
and participants are co—inquirers, the researcher is ultimately a guest or visitor to
the relationship. Participants choose what to talk about, the researcher chooses
what to write about, and through a continued negotiation and collaboration also
talk about what might be missing. In member checking, I received comments
like, “Well, I guess I didn’t talk about that very much at the time, but now I see it
as being important.” I have tried to include these further insights within the text
but my wondering is about whether having had this information earlier would
have changed or added to the essential themes. My sense is that the new
information only enhances the themes that are already present...but it could
have gone differently. If I were to engage another study using this methodology,
I would embrace member checking not just at the conclusion of the study but
throughout, and in future, I will include such a disclosure and caveat in the
consent form, preparing the participants for such an in-depth collaboration over

the long term.

Recommendations

This research serves to paint a portrait of mentoring relationships between
music therapists with a broad brushstroke. There is a wide field of possibilities
remaining for further research into this phenomenon. Survey studies could
gather demographics about the identities of current Mentors in the field and the
prevalence of both formal and informal mentoring between music therapists.

Such studies could ascertain prevalent belief structures about mentoring and
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determine educational needs. Further qualitative research could explore
‘shadow’ mentoring relationships with a view to more clearly understanding what
goes wrong in relationships, again with the goal to increase awareness and
promote education and support.

Clearly, mentoring is a phenomenon within organizations that is believed
to contribute to positive working environments through supporting both
advancement and retention. Many music therapists who do clinical work
exclusively work in isolation, and I believe that having a Mentor would greatly
enhance the quality of work life. Music therapists who work in teams or within
educational institutions will benefit from Mentors as well. I believe that further
research with the goal of increasing clarity, skill and understanding will serve the
profession and its future.

Finally, there is, I believe a pressing need for greater focus on the
institutional culture of music therapy as a sub-sector of society. I believe that as
musician-artists, sensitive and open to the human aesthetic, we have a unique
way of being in the world that heretofore has been marginalized to the extent that
we ourselves seek resonance outside our own context as we align theoretically
with extrinsic sources of knowledge and meaning making. It is certainly my
desire to continue to seek to understand that unique position we occupy as

artist/musician/social scientists.

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