_ ‘ ‘0 J.’ ’\'.' 0.\".'. “:rL'u," A. --. 1. w»‘ 19% gkfs f. ,. ' - . . 41 ' NW . I “3237?; ’ 14:! E" T" {‘I‘, 3 Yr "" ‘ 9%; . 25m; ‘ g r 1' _ 4'5". 1"" r "u‘ "Mia . g "9' I: ‘ l“ r'- v I . v- 0 1' “NM; . . ' k I . 4 i ‘4 ' - a ,-,:.2. - 4%}?! x . 13‘ . 0‘ "4'. meta gym I ‘ .n‘ WM. 33‘; i] . ‘ A {LI-,i‘,"y'.,|w it .{t l g We ‘ 1351.3?fl‘il'3115‘: i I ‘2‘ 1' “1‘75” .' J ' 0".) ""514. 58 Jllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll 3 1293 01688 7394 This is to certify that the dissertation entitled ANTICIPATORY REFLECTION WHILE LEARNING TO TEACH: THE ROLE OF HOPE, FEAR, AND EXPECTATION presented by Paul Finbarr Conway has been accepted towards fulfillment of the requirements for Ph.D. Educational Psychology degree in QWMQAA Major professor Date NVQW (if! ,/ L/ MSUI'J an Affirmative Action/Equal Opportunity Institution 0-12771 (.— LIBRARY Mlchlgan State University PLACE IN RETURN BOX to remove this checkout from your record. TO AVOID FINES return on or before date due. MTE DUE I, . DATEDUE DATE DUE “’64:: / I'v . L . _;032'2’Ju ‘5 W} 3 é’fld “u 33 JZBGZU l sit? a :2 2312 1/93 C‘JCIWM“ ANTICIPATORY REFLECTION WHILE LEARNING TO TEACH: THE ROLE OF HOPE, FEAR, AND EXPECTATION By Paul Finbarr Conway A DISSERTATION ‘ Submitted to Michigan State University in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY Department of Counseling, Educational Psychology, and Special Education 1998 ABSTRACT ANTICIPATORY REFLECTION WHILE LEARNING TO TEACH: THE ROLE OF HOPE, FEAR, AND EXPECTATION By PAUL FINBARR CONWAY This study argues that current reflective practitioner models of teacher eduCation have a temporally truncated and retrospective bias underpinning their conceptions of what it means to reflect. This bias has resulted in an emphasis, within teacher education pedagogy, on remembering over imagining and retrospective over prospective reflection. The study examines six Intern teachers' anticipations or future oriented reflection during an innovative two-semester internship program in teaching. Each Intern was interviewed three times, over a period of six months, in focus groups and one-on-one, in two contrasting school settings. During each interview Interns were asked about their hopes, fears and expectations, as an entry point into conversations about anticipation. Focus group sessions included drawing activities in order to elicit Interns' graphic representations and conversations about remembered and anticipated experiences. The questions addressed in the study were: (i) what are the changes in anticipation that occur during the internship in teaching, and (ii) to what can these changes in anticipatory reflection be attributed? Interns' anticipations emerged in three domains: the self, relationships, and institutions. Of these three domains self and relationship anticipations were most prominent. The themes of Interns anticipations in the domain of relationships were care, power, and pedagogical content knowledge; and time, resources, and self-organization in the domain of self. Issues that emerged from Interns' graphical depictions and verbal descriptions of their practicum experiences were: the reliance on cultural metanarratives to represent remembered and anticipated experiences, overextension dilemmas related to care and power, the potentially educative role of hope, and the unanticipated or surprising dimensions of the internship experience. The study contributes to our understanding of the importance of attending to and cultivating anticipation among novice teachers. Furthermore, it makes a strong case for finding more of a balance between memory (retrospective reflection) and imagination (prospective or anticipatory reflection) in teacher education coursework and conversations with prospective teachers about their field experiences. It is argued that anticipations are critical in understanding future teachers' professional development and that teacher education programs should adopt this more temporally distributed model of reflection focusing on anticipatory as well as retrospective reflection. COPyrisht by PAUL FINBARR CONWAY 1998 To my parents ACKNOWLEDGMENTS Ni neart go cur 1e chéile. Few big undertakings are accomplished alone. This was no less true in the case of this dissertation. I appreciate the support of many colleagues, friends and family, both far and near, who have helped me at various stages both throughout the Ph. D. program. I found their support particularly helpful, in the last two years, while I wrote this dissertation. My parents have always valued education and encouraged me to do so also. I am forever indebted to both of them for the numerous sacrifices they have made to make possible many of the opportunities I have been so fortunate to have. Thank you both. I also want to thank my brothers - Joe, Noel, Brian and Gerard - for their visits, many phone calls, support and good humor. I feel fortunate to have experienced such a rich environment here at Michigan State University. I am grateful to the many fellow students, local school teachers, and university faculty who have contributed in various ways to my graduate education. I want to especially thank my dissertation committee, Dr. Chris Clark (Director), Dr. Anna Neumann, Dr. Susan Florio- Ruane, and my advisor, Dr. Walter Hapkiewicz. Chris has been a model of how to be an attentive, supportive, demanding and exacting dissertation director. With his extensive experience in the fields of teacher thinking and teacher education he provided excellent guidance in our frequent meetings during the dissertation process. I especially want to thank him for detailed, quick, and thoughtful feedback during the arduous process of writing and revising the'dissertation. His emphasis on the reflexive aspects of research vi and teaching helped me plan and complete a dissertation that encouraged me to think about how I might integrate my future research within my teaching. Anna provided key insights on identity issues and, as ever, her questions were provocative and insightful. Susan was inspirational as a teacher and methodologist, as well as providing innumerable ways of reframing and extending issues in my research. My advisor, Walt, helped me think about issues in human development extending my dissertation research beyond the context of teacher education. During the practicum research I benefited greatly from his close attention to the development of my writing style. Throughout, my doctoral program he was a tremendous support personally and professionally during what sometimes felt like an endless process of graduate assistantships, papers, and courses. I enjoyed and learned alot from the many lunches we shared and the engaging conversations about university-life, sports, and educational psychology. Thanks Walt. I also want to thank my doctoral program guidance committee -- Dr. Walter Hapkiewicz (Chair), Dr. Christopher Clark, Dr. Penelope Peterson, Dr. Richard Lerner, and Dr. Steve Raudenbush. Each took time to get to know me and offered many helpful suggestions which influenced the course of my doctoral program. Above all, however, they were good models of how to be both caring and challenging educators. In addition I would also like to acknowledge a number of other people who helped me complete this dissertation. Dr. Miriam Ben-Peretz read an early draft and offered a number of key suggestions. Members of Dr. Christopher Clark's Writing Group read and responded helpfully to drafts of this dissertation. Loukia Sarroub, Steve Sheldon, Cindy Hartzler-Millar, Mark Gover, and Gaston Dembele offered invaluable suggestions in my preparations for the dissertation oral examination. vii Other faculty and graduate students also contributed greatly to my graduate school experience through the projects (LEAP, CIERA, and LATTICE) I had opportunities to work on and research groups (SCRG) I participated in, during the last five years. In particular, the following faculty have been invaluable: Dr. Carol Sue Englert (Literacy Environments for Accelerated Progress - LEAP project), Dr. King Beach (Socio-cultural Research Group), Dr. Ken Frank (MQM), Dr. Maria Teresa Tatto (Linking all types of Teachers with Intercultural Education- LATTICE project), Dr. Yong Zhao (Technology), Dr. Sharon Feiman-Nemser (Teacher Education Internship Program) and Dr. Richard Prawat. Carol Sue has been a wonderful role model as a person, teacher, and researcher. Her good humor, ceaseless enthusiasm and extensive knowledge of literacy have taught me much. Membership in King's SCRG group for the last five years was a great forum for discussing issues of human development from socio-cultural perspectives. Ken, in addition to always beating me off the squash court, introduced me to the world of advanced statistics. Teresa guided me through the process of being a participant-researcher on the LATTICE project. Yong amazed me with his energy and helped me think about the role of various technologies in educational reform. Sharon has helped me keep the question of when is student teaching truly teacher education foremost in my mind. Finally, Dick helped me think about the many thorny philosophical issues in educational psychology. Five years of graduate school were particularly enjoyable because of the close community among students and faculty in the College of Education. My educational psychology 'cohort' group of Steve Sheldon, Susan Wallace, Heather Pleasants, Meg Ropp, Dan Schultz, Jim Erekson, Tat Ming Tze, Chen Cheng Hui, Ailing Kong, Whitney Hosmer and Susan Blake were great viii colleagues and friends. Thanks to Mark Gover for his friendship and inspiring conversations and to Jim Bowker with whom I studied during doctoral comprehensive exams. Monthly 'Thank God it is Friday'(TGIF) gatherings hosted by faculty added to the community atmosphere in the Department of Educational Psychology. Fellow international students, too numerous to mention by name, in the College of Education provided wonderful insights on culture, education, and politics in various countries - around the world, as well many tasty meals during our potluck gatherings! The vibrant atmosphere among international students would not have been possible without the dedication and thoughtfulness of Anne Schneller and Dr. Jack Schwille in the Office of International Studies in Education - thank you. Ba mhaith liom buiochas a gabhail le Bord Bainistiochta Scoil Naomh Ronain, Cluain Dolcain, Baile Atha Cliath. Ach go h-airaithe ba mhaith liom buiochas a gabhail leis an Priomh-Oide Ben Dundun, na muinteoiri eile, ach go h-airaithe, Eithne Bowe, Noel Morgan, agus Jean Mason as ucht bhur litreacha agus glaoch guthain. Various others kept me going over the last five years via e—mail, phone calls, invitations to dinner, runs, camping, and chats. Thank you especially to Kailonnie Dunsmore for her friendship. Vibha Bhalla and Gaston Dembele and I had many memorable evenings together as we ate and shared stories about our earlier lives in India, Burkina Faso and Ireland respectively. Thank you to, Alison Walsh, Laurent Joncheray, Emily Kania, Nicola O'Hare, Bendicte Simon, and Walid Habib, in Ann Arbor. Thank you to Sandra O'Reilly and Scott Coleman. Runs with Valerie Friedland, Susan Wallace, Iim LeSeuer, Loukia Sarroub and others provided good conversation and refreshing breaks from long bouts with the computer! To my colleagues in ix Residence Life, from whom I learned much about different cultures of the world, conflict resolution, and community development, thank you, in many languages, to Hakan, Khaled, Ferri, Munjed, Rudie, Raul, Oggie, Ozzi, Diane, Karen, Haiming, Steve, Thompson, Mary-Ann, Valarie, Nancy, Shirleyetta, and Mary Ellen. Friends and colleagues in Ireland also provided great support. Thanks to Hugh and Marie—Annick Gash for their hospitality on my frequent visits to Dublin. I am indebted to Hugh for introducing me and inspiring me to enter the field of educational psychology. Edward and Sharon Kehoe, Greg Mannion, Colm and Hilary O'Cuanachain, and Johnny MacCarthy, all provided tangible encouragement from afar. Finally, I want to express my appreciation to the Intern teachers who participated in this research project. They gave generously of their time even though they sometimes felt overwhelmed with the demands of the Internship. When it came to audiotape transcription I could not have asked for someone more meticulous and helpful than Karla Bellingar - thank you. In addition I want to thank the principals, teachers, and university faculty, especially the two university—school liaisons whose Interns participated in this research, and other staff who helped in various ways. Buiochas 1e Dia TABLE OF CONTENTS LIST OF TABLES ....................................................................................................... xviii LIST OF FIGURES ......................................................................................................... xix CHAPTER 1 GREAT HOPES, FEARS AND EXPECTATIONS: STARTING A CONVERSATION WITH PROSPECTIVE TEACHERS ........................................... 1 Statement of the Problem .............................................................................................. 1 Explanations for Teacher Education as a Weak Intervention ................... 1 Solutions for the Weak Intervention ......................................................................... 3 Autobiographical methods ............................................................................... 3 Extended and Integrated Field Experiences .................................................. 4 Inspiration for the Study: Possible selves as the basis for a class activity ............ 5 Reflecting on a Class Activitszhen and Now .............................................. 7 Why Anticipatory Reflection? ...................................................................................... 8 Match with Program Goals ................................................................................ 8 Neglect of Anticipatory Reflection ................................................................... 9 Developmentally Appropriate .......................................................................... 9 Here-and-now versus what might be: Actual and Possible Development ........................................................................................ 9 Dissertation outline ....................................................................................................... 10 Summary ......................................................................................................................... 12 CHAPTER 2 REFLECTION AND TEMPORALITY IN LEARNING TO TEACH ..................... 13 The Reflective Practitioner Model ............................................................................. 13 Reflection in Teaching and Reflection on Teaching .............................................. 15 Recent Criticisms of the Reflective Practitioner Model ........................................ 16 Anticipatory Reflection ............................................................................................... 16 xi Conceptions of the Future in Research on Teaching ............................................. 17 Planning and anticipation: Instrumentality and Identity an Integrated Framework ...................................................................................................................... 18 Differences and Similarities among Everyday, Career and Life Flaming ........ 22 Teacher Education and Autobiography as a Pedagogical Tool ............................. 23 The Influence of Psychoanalytic Thinking .................................................. 24 Tempbrality and Reflection: From a Two to a Three Act Temporal Drama....25 Irreversibility of Time ...................................................................................... 26 The Important Role of Prior Knowledge in Learning to Teach ......................... 27 The Past and Future as Stories We Tell Ourselves in the Present ......... 3O Temporality and Reflective Thought: A Sociocultural Perspective on the Future-in-the-Present ................................................................................................... 33 Making the Future-in-the-Present ................................................................. 34 Prolepsis ............................................................................................................... 35 Prolepsis in Conversation ................................................................................ 37 Prolepsis: A Summary ...................................................................................... 38 The Michigan State University Teaching Internship: A Social Constructivist Approach to Developing Reflective Practitioners .................................................. 39 Epistemological assumptions underlying teacher education program models ............................................................................................................. 40 Teaching as assisted performance .................................................................. 42 The central role of field experience as a folk theory about learning to teach .................................................................................................................................. 47 Anticipation and teacher education .......................................................................... 51 Summary ......................................................................................................................... 53 CHAPTER THREE. TOOLS AND TALES, AND TALES OF TOOLS: LIVING A DESIGN ................. 55 Research design overview ........................................................................................... 57 xii Context and Settings ..................................................................................................... 58 The Internship ................................................................................................... 58 The Two School Settings: Negotiating Entry .............................................. 59 Rationale for Interviews: My Stance as a Researcher in this Study ....... 61 Qualitative Methods and Research on Teaching ................................................... 65 To Celebrate or Change Teachers .................................................................. 66 Phenomenological psychology ...................................................................... 66 Sources of Data ............................................................................................................... 70 The Interviews ................................................................................................... 70 Timing of the Interviews ................................................................................. 72 The Content and Format of the One-to-One Interviews .......................... 73 In-depth Phenomenological Interviewing: A Three Phase Model ....... 74 Shared Aspects of All Three Interviews ....................................................... 75 A Rationale for Hopes and Fears as a Proxy for Anticipation ................. 76 The One-to-one Interviews ......................................................................................... 79 Surprise as the Unanticipated ......................................................................... 81 The Content and Format of the Focus Group Interviews .................................... 87 The Participants .............................................................................................................. 96 Rachel ................................................................................................................... 97 Kelly ...................................................................................................................... 99 Gina ..................................................................................................................... 101 Thomas .............................................................................................................. 102 Olga ..................................................................................................................... 103 Michelle ............................................................................................................. 104 Data Analysis ................................................................................................................ 105 Analytic Moves ................................................................................................ 106 Narrative Psychology and Narrative Analysis ......................................... 108 xiii Summary ....................................................................................................................... 111 CHAPTER 4 CHANGES IN ANTICIPATORY REFLECTION: TURBULENCE, OPTIMISM AND EVER CHANGING HOPES AND FEARS ................................................... 112 Contours of the Intern year: Shared Internship; Different Journeys? .............. 113 Linear Anticipations and Non-linear Experiences ................................... 115 Patterns in the Story-line Drawings ............................................................. 115 The Role of Hope ............................................................................................. 120 Internship as a Cultural Transition Experiences ...................................... 122 Societal Metanarratives and Presentation of Self while Learning to Teach ................................................................................................................... 122 Actual Experience Drawings as Records of Growth and Development .................................................................................................... 133 Summary ....................................................................................................................... 135 Metanarratives ................................................................................................. 135 Surprise .............................................................................................................. 136 Holding My Breath: "When I Have My Own Classroom" ................................. 138 Moving Toward Openness and Flexibility ................................................. 141 Tension Between CT Classroom and Interns Hoped for Classroom....148 Limitations on Anticipating Hoped For Classroom ................................ 149 Summary .......................... , ................................................................................. 150 Learning to Teach: Ever Changing Hopes and Fears ........................................... 152 Hopes Related to Teaching ............................................................................ 154 Fears Related to Teaching .............................................................................. 158 Hopes and Fears Related to Teaching: Different Views on Anticipation ...................................................................................................... 163 Surprise: The Unanticipated Dimensions of Learning to Teach ....................... 167 Summary ....................................................................................................................... 171 xiv CHAPTER 5 ANTICIPATIONS: RELATIONSHIPS AND SELF. . 173 Relationship Anticipations ....................................................................................... 174 Self-extensions .................................................................................................. 175 Anticipating Teaching as Caring for Oneself and Others .................................... 176 Self-care and learning to teach ...................................................................... 185 Power over, for, among and with others ................................................................ 189 Discipline and Punishment: Power over Others ...................................... 186 Making a Difference: Power for Others ....................................................... 194 Legitimacy in front of Others: Power among Others ............................... 198 Maintenance of Relationship with CT: Power with Others ................... 201 Teaching Others Something: Anticipating Others Subject Matter Knowledge ......................................................................................................... 207 Pedagogical Content Knowledge .................................................................. 208 Surprised by Children’s Prior Knowledge .................................................. 209 The Self and Anticipation while Learning to Teach ............................................ 214 Time .................................................................................................................... 215 Resources ........................................................................................................... 218 Summary ....................................................................................................................... 227 CHAPTER 6 BALANCING MEMORY AND IMAGINATION IN TEACHER EDUCATION ................................................................................................................ 229 Summary of Claims .................................................................................................... 229 The Presence and Importance of Anticipatory Reflection: With an Eye on the Pedagogical Horizon .......................................................................... 230 The Identity Focus of Interns Anticipations .............................................. 231 The Role of Hope in Learning to Teach ................................................................. 231 Optimistic Biases or Positive Illusions ........................................................ 233 The Psychological and Pedagogical Role of Hope ..................................... 233 XV The Origin of Interns Hope ........................................................................... 235 The Role of Surprise in Promoting Inquiry ........................................................... 235 The Origins of Surprises ................................................................................. 236 The Domains of Intern's Anticipations: Self and Relationships ..................... 237 Increasing Prominence of Relational Anticipations ................................ 238 Dilemmas about Self-extension: Identity Dilemmas? ......................................... 239 Care and Power: Dilemmas of Identity ....................................................... 240 Emergence of Tension Between Current and Hoped for Teaching Setting....241 Memory and Imagination while Learning to Teach ............................................ 243 Implications of Reconfiguring Memory and Imagination in Teacher Education ........................................................................................................... 244 Contributions of the study ......................................................................................... 245 Contribution to Teacher Education Program(s) and Participants ......... 245 Contribution to Research on Teaching ....................................................... 247 Contribution to Research on the Psychology of Anticipation ............... 248 Methodology of the study .............................................................................. 249 Conclusion .................................................................................................................... 249 APPENDIX A ONE-TO-ONE INTERVIEW PROTOCOL DECEMBER ........................................ 251 APPENDIX B FOCUS GROUP ACTIVITY DECEMBER ................................................................. 258 APPENDIX C ONE-TO-ONE INTERVIEW PROTOCOL FEBRUARY ......................................... 260 APPENDIX D FOCUS GROUP ACTIVITY FEBRUARY ................................................................. 265 APPENDIX E ONE-TO-ONE INTERVIEW PROTOCOL APRIL ................................................. 267 APPENDIX F xvi FOCUS GROUP ACT IVTTY APRIL ......................................................................... 271 APPENDIX G CURRENT & HOPED FOR DRAWING RUBRIC ............................................... 272 LIST OF REFERENCES ................................................................................................ 274 xvii Table 1 Table 2 Table 3 Table 4 Table 5 Table 6 Table 7 Table 8 Table 9 Table 10 Table 11 Table 12 Table 13 Table 14 LIST OF TABLES Comparison of Attributes of Everyday Planning, Life Planning, and Composing a Life as a Prospective Teacher .............................. 21 Promoting Reflective Practice from a Vygotskian Perspective....46 One-to-One and Focus Group Interview Summary ...................... 83 Interview # 1 - Coding Categories: Feb. 24. 1997 .............................. 85 Main Participants and Secondary Participants ................................ 87 Intern Information ................................................................................ 97 Current-Ideal Drawing Rubric Categories ...................................... 142 Interns' Teaching Related Hopes that Loomed Largest September to April by Category ........................................................ 160 Summary of Total Teaching Related Hopes by Category ............ 160 Interns' Teaching Related Fears that Loomed Largest September to April by Category ........................................................ 161 Summary of Total Teaching Related Fears September to April by Category .................................................................................. 161 Interns' Self as Teacher Related Hopes September to April by SubCategory ................................................................................... 164 Interns' Self as Teacher Related Fears September to April by Sub-Category .................................................................................... 164 Anticipatory Domains, Themes, and Dilemmas .......................... 172 xviii Figure 1 Figure 2 Figure 3 Figure 4 Figure 5 Figure 6 Figure 7 LIST OF FIGURES Interns’ Anticipated and Remembered Story-lines ..................... 116 Rachel's Current & Future Drawings .............................................. 145 Gina's Current 8: Future Drawings ................................................. 146 Hilary's Current 8: Future Drawings ............................................... 147 Domains of Anticipatory Reflection based Content Analysis of Teaching Related Hopes and Fears ............................................. 157 Domains of Intern's Hopeful Anticipations ................................. 166 Domains of Intern's Fearful Anticipations .................................... 166 xix CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION Rationale for this study Teacher education programs are in a crisis about their own effectiveness. Minimal change in beliefs among graduates of teacher education programs has bolstered a conclusion that teacher education is a i weak intervention (Kennedy, Ball, McDiarmid, Schmidt, 1990; McDiarmid & Ball, 1989). It is widely accepted that it is difficult to influence the beliefs, knowledge, and actions of student teachers during teacher education programs, despite concerted efforts to graduate 'reflective practitioners' in most contemporary teacher education programs. k ' rv ' n f t a h r a ' The problem of the 'weak intervention' of pre-service teacher education has many potential explanations, all vying for preeminence: inadequate subject matter knowledge, the overpowering influence of the 'apprenticeship of observation' and prior knowledge (Lortie, 1975), difficulties in transforming and representing knowledge in meaningful ways for children, cognitive-developmental limitations of young adults (Perry, 1968), life task demands of early adulthood (Havighurst, 1951), relatively low academic achievement levels among entrants to teacher education programs in the US (Lanier & Little, 1986; Darling-Hammond, 1996), and a schism between university-based knowledge and practitioner-based knowledge in the 'real world' of practicum school and classroom (Buchmann & Schwille, 1983). Teacher education for some or all of these reasons is seen as a 'weak intervention'. Even when beliefs and intentions of student teachers seem to have been influenced they are then 'washed out' during the first few years of teaching (Zeichner & Tabachnick, 1981). Addressing each of the explanations noted above, alone or in combination, in teacher education programs is fraught with difficulties. First, overcoming inadequate subject matter knowledge is difficult in a relatively short period of time and even then does not address the even more important issue of future teachers' ability to transform and represent knowledge to children and adolescents entrusted to their care (Shulman, 1987). Second, the overwhelming influence of the 'apprenticeship of observation' (Lortie, 1975) and prior knowledge makes it difficult for teacher educators to influence deeply held beliefs about knowledge, teaching and learning (Peterson, Clark, & Dickson, 1990; Anderson, Blumenfeld, Pintrich, Clark, Marx, & Peterson, 1995; Richardson, 1996). Even lengthening the duration of teacher education programs, as is the case with teaching Internship programs, still may be countered by these powerful past experiences. Third, the developmental level of most student teachers as young adults poses cognitive and life task constraints on what an ambitious teacher education program striving to graduate 'transformative intellectuals' may hope to accomplish (Perry, 1968). Fourth, the seductive power of experience, the real world, and hands on experience for student teachers in providing the real stuff of teaching leaves the university based teacher educator, more often than not, playing catch up trying to justify the worth of teacher education courses (Buchmann & Schwille, 1983). These authors all make clear, for a variety of reasons, that student teachers' personal beliefs about themselves as learners and as teachers are centrally implicated in learning to teach (Lortie, 1975; Zeichner 8r Tabachnick, 1981; Peterson, Clark, & Dickson, 1990; Feiman-Nemser, & Featherstone, 1992). This stress on the significance of student teachers' personal beliefs, we might even call these intimate beliefs, draws researchers and teacher educators towards tracing student teachers' evolving subjective realities of their teaching experiences. The importance of taking student teacher beliefs into account has been a central tenet of reflective practitioner oriented pre- service teacher education programs in the last fifteen years (Schon, 1983; van Manen, 1995). Two approaches alone or combined have been widely used to promote teacher education programs as a more powerful intervention: use of autobiographical methods as a pedagogical tool and the development of extended and more integrated field experiences. S l I' E I] l . l' AW One solution to the stability of prospective teacher's beliefs has been to use autobiographical reflection in teacher education coursework. This solution is intended to assist prospective teachers delve more deeply into their prior knowledge and experiences so that these can be either overcome or built upon in developing teachers who are both self-aware and self-critical. Assuming that prospective teacher's prior knowledge and experiences are like misconceptions which can be ejected and then replaced or overcome seems naive and at odds with the acknowledged importance and stability of such prior knowledge (Smith, Roschelle, diSessa, 1993/ 1994). Furthermore the replacement of misconceptions hypothesis seems disrespectful of students experiences and ethically questionable. However, assuming that student teachers prior knowledge can be built upon or reconfigured seems more plausible given the research on the enduring facets of prior knowledge and experiences. In addition attempting to reconfigure or build upon student teachers' prior knowledge is to me more ethically defensible since it may include greater respect for student's prior knowledge and identity. Extendedandmtegratedexpenences Another solution has been to lengthen the duration of field experiences in teacher education programs. In many of the programs that have extended the field experience component it has also included an effort to better integrate field experiences with coursework Among some widely cited examples of extended field experiences with greater efforts to integrate coursework and field experiences are the teacher education program at the University of Cincinnati featured in TIME magazine (Wulf, 1997), Oxford University, England, (McIntyre, 1990; McIntyre, 1993), Michigan State University (Feiman-Nemser 8: Beasley, 1997). The central goal of each of these programs has been to make teacher education a more powerful intervention. When a new and longer teacher education program is established, as happened at Michigan State University beginning in 1993, the question is whether the aforementioned problems still remain valid criticisms or are directly resolved by the new program. When the new program costs more, takes more faculty time, adds a year to the time it takes future teachers to graduate, and doubles the practicum period, it raises serious questions about what the compensating benefits are for graduates. Among the questions it raises is the nature of prospective teachers' reflection in such programs. Do these prospective teachers begin their two semester Internship with the same concerns as traditional teacher education students and end up thinking and grappling with different concerns? If they do, is this because the program affords more sophisticated levels of reflection as a result of the prolonged practicum? These questions about the Internship program come from a perspective that privileges learning rather than organizational theory as the preferred perspective for understanding educational change. However, these questions suggest the work reported here is a program evaluation study. It is not. While some of the remarks I make or the voices of the participants speak directly to program evaluation this is of secondary concern to the primary focus of this study, which is novice teachers' anticipatory or prospective reflection. Let me first recount the inspiration for this study and then provide a rationale for attending more deliberately to anticipatory reflection in pre-service teacher education as an alternative solution to the weak intervention problem. a {fin o .r I-.. _. o -_‘ : - - n- --. o - - ..qav; During the first session of Teacher Education 301, Learners and Learning in Context, Summer 1996, the first course in Michigan State University's teacher education program, I asked each student to complete two sentences on a blank sheet of paper. The sentences were 'What I hope most in learning to teach is...‘ and 'What I fear most in learning to teach is...'. Then since we were sitting in a circle I asked them to roll up this piece of paper and throw it across the room to another member of the class and asked each person to again throw the piece of paper. At that point I asked them to open up and read the one piece of paper that had landed near them after this second throwing. Looking around the class I asked someone to read out the 'hope' expressed on their sheet and continued until all hopes had been read out. Without discussing hopes I then asked each in turn to read out the 'fear' expressed on their sheet of paper. What followed then was quiet dramatic and engaging conversation by these students in their first week of the teacher education program. The students mentioned teachers they hoped to emulate or teachers they feared being like. They mentioned atmospheres, incidents or events they hoped to be able to create and others they feared they would be involved in as future teachers. I very much doubt that the conversation would have been quite as engaging or generative if I had only asked about hopes or fears alone. Somehow I think that asking about both hopes and fears made each seem more salient and real: the contrasting affective contour of each set the other in relief. For example, if I had only asked the students to talk about their hopes or aspirations the conversation would have neglected an important aspect of these teachers' stances as future teachers', namely, their fears. I chose this class activity because of the reading on possible selves (Markus & Nurius, 1986; Cross & Markus, 1990) I had been doing over the previous year that seemed to offer the potential of using possible selves, a person's hopes, fears, and expectations, to understand anticipatory socialization. It occurred to me that possible selves might also be a fruitful way in which to understand novice teachers' concerns and aspirations. What was most intriguing to me, in reading the possible selves literature and having undertaken the aforementioned class activity, was the degree to which the themes of hope, fear, and expectation were alive and active among soon to be teachers. Furthermore, inquiry about possible selves elicited both cognitive and affective aspects of these future teachers' beliefs as I saw from their spirited responses. Reflecting on this activity, at that time, I realized that it might be useful to begin thinking of teacher development in general, and student teacher or Intern teacher development specifically, in terms of possible selves and what I later learned could be described as anticipatory reflection (van Manen, 1995). Knowles, Cole and Presswood (1994) cite numerous studies that highlighted the enduring themes of hope, fear and expectation in learning to teach. Despite the notice given to hopes, concerns and expectations of student teachers there is a general and widespread suspicion (Nias, 1996; Noddings, 1996) of emotion/ affect in education and social science: too warm, too fuzzy, too uncontrollable. However, the pervasiveness of anxieties, fears, and concerns in the early stages of learning to teach are also spotlighted by Veenman (1984) in his extensive review of the perceived problems of beginning teachers. The 'hopes and fears' class activity convinced me that these themes and the theme of expectations would be appropriate operationalizations of anticipatory reflection with future teachers. «Moreover, learning to teach, as an activity, is accompanied by strong affect. Indeed it is the affective intensity of learning to teach that constitutes both it's peril and appeal. Furthermore, trying out a questionnaire with many experienced teachers in a Masters level educational psychology course and post-BA teacher education students on their professional hopes and fears convinced me of the generative nature of these themes in understanding anticipatory reflection. B E I' l . . l 1 Reflecting again on this activity one year later, in June 1997, I began thinking of this class activity as a critical incident in my own teaching and research. One year later the activity had become more salient in my mind since it formed the point of departure for my current research. In retelling the incident I see it in a new light: it looms larger, takes on a watershed significance, and is a source of inspiration. It is interpreted from the point of view of that day in the past being retold in the present. Inevitably, this leads to the important understanding that remembering the past and imagining the future are always undertaken from the point of view of the present. 150 .. flI' ? Why focus on anticipatory reflection that student teachers engage in during the internship? Four reasons favor the adoption of a focus on anticipatory reflection: first, it matches the MSU teacher education program's stated goal of graduating reflective practitioners, second, there is a general neglect of the prospective, future oriented, imaginative aspects of teacher reflection, it seems a developmentally appropriate focus in working with prospective teachers as they look to the future in their chosen careers and finally, there is much to be learned about prospective teacher development by listening not only to where student teachers are in the present but also where they think they might be in the future. anhpmggals, Most importantly, the Internship can be seen as a 'The Year of Reflection' since, by both design and happenstance, reflection and contemplation are foregrounded. The MSU teacher education program is designed with the explicit purpose of furthering the Interns' reflective capacities. With regard to practice, the focus on anticipatory reflection is in the spirit of constructivist teaching, which attempts to take account of the learners' perspective -- in this case student teachers' emergent professionalism. For example, anticipatory reflection can address images of teaching and teachers that future pedagogues want to emulate or shake off, that they want to nurture or weed out. The adoption of an anticipatory reflection perspective is potentially very fruitful in understanding the fifth year internship that is designed to graduate teachers who are more competent and mindful about teaching. The program is twice as long, at least, as many teaching practica in traditional programs. Thus one might wonder if there is a different developmental process for Intern teachers as they learn to teach over the two semester Internship. This begs the question that if the Internship program is a stronger intervention than traditional teacher education programs the stronger program effects might manifest themselves in the domain of anticipatory reflection. W The use of autobiographical methods as the method of choice to promote greater awareness and a self- critical stance among prospective and practicing teachers has resulted in the dominance of a retrospective stance toward reflection. This retrospective stance obscures and sidelines the prospective, future-oriented, anticipatory, or imaginative dimensions of reflection or cognition among prospective teachers. In summary the use of autobiographical methods has brought about a situation where memory and remembering are privileged over imagination and imagining in teacher education coursework. From a temporal perspective the focus on retrospective aspects of reflection has resulted in a temporally truncated view of reflection and cognition in teacher education. W A focus on anticipatory reflection seemed developmentally appropriate since student teachers are investing considerable energy both psychologically and socially in the future as they begin to fashion a professional identity (Bullough, Knowles, & Crow, 1991). Greene (1986) notes that adolescents and young adults have an increased consciousness of time and temporal phenomena which appears can be best understood from a contextualist rather than cognitive-developmentalist perspective. Thus, I argue, the circumstances of the Interns with their new career looming on the horizon and the sheer affective intensity of this experience channels their attention and makes them alert to 'becoming a teacher' in the immediate and long term future. dexelgpmem, In her Presidential address to the American Educational Research Association meeting Ann Brown (1994) noted how both many versions of progressive education nd current has focused attention on the developmental level of learners in the present, that is, actual development. She continues by contrasting this position with a Vygotskian perspective which addresses the realm of potential development. This study's focus on anticipatory reflection likewise addresses potential development and thereby draws attention to the relative neglect of this important lens on teacher development. Furthermore, life-span developmentalists (Neugarten, 1977; Whitbourne, 1985) and researchers focusing on self-development (Allport, 1955; Gergen, 1972; James, 1890; Maslow, 1954; Ryff, 1984; Schutz, 1964) according to Cross and Markus (1991) all "stress that what an individual is striving for, or is in the process of 'becoming' is at least as significant for explaining individual functioning as what the individual currently is" (p. 231). In slightly different fashions all these researchers draw attention to how "in an effort to describe the actual or here-and-now self, researchers have ignored the power of the self that 'might be'" (Cross 8: Markus, p. 231). I contend that teacher education researchers focusing on teacher self- development have been equally remiss by focusing on the here-and-now self of teachers at the expense of teachers' future or potential selves. D . | |' IT This dissertation is organized into five sections: the problem, the literature, the design, the claims, and the conclusions. I will, broadly speaking, follow this outline but have taken some liberties in my chapter titles in the hope of communicating a key idea in each chapter through the title. In Chapter One, Introduction, I outline what educational problems are being addressed in this study. Chapter Two, Reflection and Temporality in Learning to Teach moves beyond the immediate confines of this study and draws on literature in psychology, philosophy, teacher education, 10 anthropology and human development to weave an argument and develop a framework for understanding anticipatory reflection in the context of novice teachers' field experiences. I question the retrospective bias of the reflective practitioner model of teacher education and make a case for a more temporally distributed model of reflection focusing on anticipatory as well as retrospective reflection. Chapter Three, Tools and Tales, and Tales of Tools: Living a Design, articulates why I adopted a phenomenological stance in this study and the'way I sought to use conversation and imagery as tools to understand the anticipatory aspects of learning to teach. In Part Two I recount my extensive conversations and drawing activities with six prospective teachers during a two semester teaching Internship. Chapter Four, Changes in Anticipatory Reflection: Turbulence, Optimism and Ever Changing Hopes and Fears, I describe the extent to which the Interns' experiences during the internship were a tremendous surprise to each of them and how they used societal metanarratives to represent both their anticipations and their actual experiences. Based on a content analysis of their expressed teaching related hopes and fears I then describe three domains of Intems' anticipations: relationships, self, and institutions. In Chapter Five, Relationship and Self Anticipations, I give a number of illustrative examples to convey the various anticipatory sub-themes within the two main anticipatory domains (relationships and self) about which the Interns spoke. In Chapter Six, Balancing Memory and Imagination in Teacher Education, I outline the study's main claims and then describe the implications of these claims for educational psychologists, teacher educators, prospective teachers and collaborating teachers, and researchers. I make a case for finding a better balance between memory and imagination in teacher 1] education coursework and conversations with prospective teachers about their field experiences. Summary In summary, the field experience component of MSU's new teacher preparation program is longer and more in depth than most. Furthermore, the two semester internship, a keystone element of this program, has not been adequately studied. Hence, it is crucial that the we begin to more comprehensively understand the experience of the program, from the Interns' point of view, i.e., their subjective realities as pivotal in educational change. The internship program can thus be viewed more generally as a significant innovation in teacher education and more specifically as an innovation intended to promote anticipatory reflection, or future-oriented reflection, of Intern teachers. For the purposes of this study I focused on future teachers' expressed hopes, fears, and expectations as a starting point in understanding student teachers' anticipatory reflection. Adopting this theme or thematizing approach, according to Kvale (1996), the study addressed two main research questions: (1) What changes in anticipatory reflection occur during the Internship in teaching?, and (2) To what can these changes in anticipatory reflection be attributed? 12 CHAPTER 2 REFLECTION AND TEMPORALITY IN LEARNING TO TEACH This chapter is composed of three sections First, I situate anticipation both within the reflective practitioner model of teacher education and prominent frameworks on the preactive phase of teaching. I note the temporally truncated focus on reflection in current enactments of the reflective practitioner model of teacher education. This retrospective bias in the current construal of reflection can be attributed to a temporally truncated view of reflection. Thus anticipatory or prospective dimensions of reflection are obscured and under—exploited in current teacher education practices. Second, I present a sociocultural perspective on reflection since it offers a more temporally distributed framework on reflection. I draw attention to how anticipation reflects the distribution of mind in both culture and time. Third, I describe the internship to situate the programs' social constructivist approach to graduating reflective practitioners within traditions and practices of teacher education. In conclusion my analysis advocates a more temporally distributed model of reflection to reframe the temporally truncated conception of reflection pervasive in reflective practitioner models of teacher education. The reflective practitioner model: An international resurgence. A central tenet of recent educational reform efforts internationally has been an emphasis on both pre-service and in-service teachers reflecting on their practice (Schdn, 1983, 1987; van Manen, 1995; Calderhead & Gates, 1993; LaBoskey, 1994; Hatton & Smith, 1995; Fullan & Stiegelbauer, 1991). The focus on reflection has swept both pre- and in-service teacher education programs 13 to the extent that it has become the most popular discourse on professionalism in many countries including the United States (Galluzzo 8: Howey, 1997), England and Wales (Whitty, Miles, Barton, Whiting, 8: Furlong, 1997) and Australia (Walker, Preston, 8: Mitchell, 1997). Reflective thought, as defined by Dewey is active, persistent, and careful consideration of any belief or supposed form of knowledge in the light of the grounds that support it and further conclusions to which it tends. (1933, p.9) Despite the attention to teacher reflection by Dewey in the early part of this century it is only in the last fifteen years that the notion of reflection has become a guiding beacon for teacher education. Shulman and Colbert characterize teachers who embody the contemporary focus on reflection as those who can learn from their own experience. Reflection requires that a teacher be able to lQQlleas‘ls on his or her own teaching and it's consequences. (Shulman 8: Colbert, 1989, p.44) The reflective practitioner model, acting as a centrifugal force since mid-80's in professional education, precipitated a move from a behavioral competency model supported by process-product research on teaching (Good 8: Brophy, 1986) to a social contructivist model of teacher learning (Englert, Tarrant, Mariage, 1992). Carefully examining the two quotations above drew my attention to an apparent discrepancy in temporal emphasis. Dewey characterizes reflection as deliberate thoughtfulness about teaching beliefs and practices without specifying that it has a predominant retrospective focus. Shulman and Colbert, in contrast, seem to privilege looking back on teaching experience and it's consequences. This subtle shift in emphasis, which accurately l4 characterizes much of contemporary reflective-oriented theory and practice in teacher preparation programs, has had far reaching implications in terms of privileging retrospective over prospective reflection. The current focus on autobiography and life-history exemplifies this attention to retrospective reflection. While not denying that a focus on retrospective reflection, more than likely, may perform some anticipatory function, the almost exclusive focus on retrospective reflection, looking backwards in time, seems to me to negate the potential benefits of a more explicit focus on prospective reflection. Reflection in teaching and reflection on teaching. Focusing on student teachers' development by starting with hopes, fears and expectations, or possible selves (Markus 8: Nurius, 1986), locates my work in the realm of what van Manen (1995) terms 'anticipatory reflection' or anticipation of future teaching experiences. He identifies 'anticipatory reflection' as future-oriented reflection before action, 'retrospective reflection' as past-oriented reflection after action, and both of these as "thinking Qn__o_r about teaching" (p. 34). By way of contrast he describes "thinking in the experience of teaching" (p. 34), or , reflection in action, and identifies 'contemporaneous reflection' as a 'stop and think', after a lesson or unit, that differs from the more 'immediate reflection' demanded by the urgency of classroom second-to-second decision making during actual teaching. Reflection as conceptualized by van Manen is a temporally distributed phenomenon involving the preactive, interactive and postactive phases of teaching. Other than van Manen's work the considerable literature on reflection has sidelined the temporally distributed dimension of reflection in favor of levels, domains and the academic traditions of reflective thought. 15 Recent criticisms of the reflective practitioner model Zeichner's (1994), invited address to the International Study Association on Teacher Thinking (ISATT) meeting in Gothenburg, Sweden, is illustrative of the prevailing conceptions of reflection which favor levels, models and academic traditions over a temporal perspective on reflection. He presented both a conceptual overview and cogent criticism of the reflective practitioner literature and related practices in teacher education. Zeichner (1994) and others (Laursen, 1994) have claimed that reflection in teacher education programs is used so glibly that it is a vacuous and meaningless concept prey to changing political ideologies and handmaiden to the latest fad or whimsical notion of teacher education. Zeichner drew attention to the advantages and disadvantages of various efforts to clarify conceptions of reflection. Among the conceptual issues and frameworks on reflection that he noted are: the technical, practical, critical levels of reflective thought (Carr and Kemis, 1986; van Manen, 1977), the debate over the detached logical-rational view of reflection versus reflection as a process imbued by a more connected ethic of care, the tension between reflection as an individual or solo undertaking versus reflection as a social practice, and finally the academic traditions within which reflection has been enacted in teacher education programs. Despite his broad overview of reflective models and practices he did not address the dominant temporally truncated conception of reflection. Anticipatory reflection Anticipation is a rich concept in that it suggests the uncertain, the premature; it alludes to high hopes and expectations, it allows for caution and foreboding, prediction and prescience. All of these anticipations are active 16 during the Internship. Over the last few months in conversations with colleagues I have noticed that using the term anticipatory reflection makes some people uneasy since the term appears to be contradictory. The apparent internal contradiction has to do with the observation that anticipation denotes looking forward in time and reflection looking back in time. However, I argue that what is meant by ’looking back’ is turning inward, examining one's own experiences or anticipated experiences not exclusively looking back in time. Looking back in the reflective sense is about gaining some reflective distance to better understand the meaning of lived experience, one’s relationship within and to the world. Reflection is not only, about taking the long view backward in time but also, and this is borne out in experience, about looking forward toward the horizon. Looking toward the future with knowledge of the past from the viewpoint of the present, I am suggesting, is a particularly salient aspect of novice teachers' everyday experience. This clarification I am making is crucial in not constraining the temporal dimension of reflection from a conceptual standpoint. Furthermore, at least as importantly, from a practitioner's viewpoint, it addresses the lack of attention paid to the anticipatory dimension of novice teachers reflective thought. Conceptions of the future in research on teachers and teaching: Research on the preactive phase of teaching. There is considerable research related to anticipatory reflection in learning to teach that does not use the term directly. This indirectly related research includes studies of teacher concerns extending over the last seventy years (for a review see Veenman, 1984), the Tyler rationale and its' spectacular influence on curriculum planning since the fifties, teacher planning and 17 decision making research mainly during the late seventies and early eighties (Shavelson, 1976; Clark, 1986; Clark 8: Peterson, 1986), and the teacher expectations (Good, 1987) research over the last thirty years. Other less frequently cited work addresses teacher thinking about the future in terms of teacher "future perspective" (Kelchtermans, 1993; Kelchtermans 8: Vandenberghe, 1993; Janssens 8: Kelchtermans, 1997), the school of the future (Andersson 8: Lawenius, 1983), lifemapping (Kompf, 1997), and recent work growing out of the future orientation literature pertaining to teacher development as action in context (Lauriala, 1997). Common to most of these, but especially to the Tyler rationale, teacher planning and teacher expectations literatures are the instrumental focus of these research traditions. ' What I mean by instrumental focus is that the completion of a task or the accomplishment of an important short term goal or objective characterizes much of the research on teacher planning, teacher expectations, and Tyler rationale inspired research. Lacking in each of these perspectives, on the preactive phase of teaching, is the imagination and identity-related dimensions of teaching. Let me give an example from a recent review of the literature on short term and long term planning in human development. This review of the human development literature on planning provides a contrast to the teacher education literature since it includes both an imagination and identity component in addition to an instrumental focus. Planning and anticipation: Instrumentality and identity an integrated framework. I have outlined the research on the preactive phase of teaching drawing attention to the relative balance between instrumentality and identity in comparing, for example, the teacher planning research with this 18 study’s focus on anticipation. Whereas planning tends to have a predominantly instrumental focus the notion of anticipation involves more identity related concerns. By instrumental focus I mean the main question the teacher asks of him or herself is ’what can I do today, tomorrow or next month’?: the task is the main question. By identity focus I mean the question foregrounded by the teacher is more likely to be ’who can I be today, tomorrow, next month or next year’? or ’who can I relate to today, tomorrow, next month or next year’? Implicit in the identity realm is a longer time perspective. Note the two versions of the identity question: ’Who can I be?’ and ’To whom can I relate’? The former has a more psychological focus, the latter a more relational. I will return to this bifocal dimension of identity later. I would now like to further develop this contrast between the more short term instrumental focus and the more long term and relationally imbued focus of the anticipatory perspective. I present this contrast in the form of a model to draw further attention to the temporal and relational dimensions of each perspective. Smith (1996) in her review of life-planning research presents a model of how people think about events in advance. Much research focuses on events after they have occurred i.e. retrospective oriented research on human development. Referring to actual human experience she notes that Many events, however, are considered in advance. Some degree of thought is given to how events might unfold: People think about future emotional states, about possible best and worst scenarios, and about possible consequences of action...Life planning involves thinking about future content, course, and purpose of an individual’s life. Engaging in such future anticipation serves to reduce uncertainty, motivate behavior, and enhance an individual’s sense of well-being. (p.243) 19 She sire foc She, as I do, favors and uses the term ’active anticipations’ to encompass both short term task oriented planning and the longer term ”decisions and strategies intended to shape the lives of individuals” (p. 243). The term ’active anticipation’ is helpful in conceptualizing the relative focus on the instrumental versus the identity focus in learning to teach. Thus, the question that seems most pertinent is what aspects of anticipation in learning to teach are shared with life planning or everyday planning respectively. In essence this raises the question about the relative role of instrumental and identity oriented anticipation in learning to teach. The attributes in Smith’s comparative framework on everyday and life planning goals, knowledge, resources, actions, and actors provide five helpful comparative categories. 20 Table 1 Comparison of attributes of everyday planning, life planning, and composing a life as a prospective teacher (after Smith, 1996). lTlanning everyday Planning about life Composing a life as tasks a prospective 4 ' teacher G ALS . Usually one goal 0 Usually multiple, 0 Single but complex goals complex goal 0 Goal is exact, 0 Complex goal has 0 Goals have been specified or easily to be created chosen 8: often found prescribed 0 Priority setting 0 Goals tend to be 0 Goals may be easy for plans vague vague or clear 0 Goal achiev. = 0 Goal achiev. = 0 Goal achiev = closed problem and opens up new goals static and running static target - running target targets 0 Goals are 'cool'. 0 Goals 'hot' i.e. Goals 'hot'. High little emotional High emotions 8: emotions 8: high involvement high stakes stakes KNOWLEDGE 0 Mostly complete 0 Imperfect many 0 Many routines but routine scenarios uncertainty TIME 0 Short-term, high 0 Long-term, 0 Long-term, (Usually...) limited 8: low flexible with high flexible, and high variability variability variability RESOURCES 0 Required 0 Required 0 Required (Usually ..... ) resources known 8: resources not be resources usually usually to hand in known and not known but not advance always available always available ACTIONS 0 Highly 0 Low 0 Low to high controllable controllability control 0 Relatively simple; 0 Highly complex 0 Complex, often prioritized. with sequence routinized 8: unclear sequence glen 0 Often detailed 0 Frequent 0 Often detailed anticipation of reconstruction of anticipation and "plan of action" vague plan of action reconstruction of before hand " lans of action" 0 Low error rate 0 High error rate 0 Low 8: high error rate ACTORS . Usually a single 0 Usually more than 0 More than one planner; single one planner planner providing memory but may provides input input often from involve managing [groups, family, outside the others mentor] immediate teaching setting 21 Differences and similarities among everyday planning, career, and life- planning. Smith (1996), in her review of the everyday and life-planning literature, identifies similarities and differences between everyday and life- planning. First both processes are active anticipations. Furthermore, in terms of similarities both processes involve ”the generation, selection, and coordination of goals and strategies for implementing decisions and actions to obtain these goals” (p. 246). However, she continues by qualifying this claim of similarity noting how life-planning is more likely to involve generation, selection, and coordination of components far less certain in definition and inherently more complex than in everyday planning. Extending this distinction, to learning to teach suggests that it may neither be solely like everyday planning in its instrumentality nor like life-planning in its identity focus but some intermediary position seems most theoretically and practically defensible. Reflecting on my own experience as a primary school teacher, on conversations with other teachers, on readings in the research on teacher planning, and on work with student teachers everyday planning is an inherent aspect of teacher’s lives but there is more to the story of learning to teach than the decision making involved in planning. Thus teaching, and particularly learning to teach, may also be like life-planning in it’s uncertainty and investment of self. Smith cogently describes the difference between everyday and life-planning in terms of the differential emotional and relational investment. While the efficiency of planning for the completion of an errand or the organization of a dinner menu may produce short-term frustration or happiness, planning to begin parenthood and to raise a child can have life-time implications...life plans may also be more intimately linked 22 to social, interpersonal, and emotional dimensions of the self compared with everyday plans. (p. 248) While teaching is neither exclusively like planning a dinner menu or solely like planning to become a parent it has aspects of both planning experiences. In light of both the everyday and life-planning aspects of learning to teach I have created a third category called career planning, or composing a life as a prospective teacher, occupying the far left column in Table 1 in addition to the everyday and life-planning columns in Smith’s model as represented in columns one and two. Having compared the research on the preactive phase of teaching with the human development literature on everyday planning and life planning I now turn to the role of autobiography in promoting reflection in teacher education. I claim that the focus on autobiography has supported a retrospective bias to the practice of teacher education. Teacher education and autobiography as pedagogical tool. I now turn to the role of biography in teacher education and critique its retrospective temporal bias. The introduction and widespread acceptance of biographical methods in the preparation of future teachers and professional education of experienced teachers is possibly the most striking change in teaching method among teacher education programs in the last decade. My main point is simple: the focus on autobiography has given an undue role to retrospective reflection but that autobiographical methods, framed appropriately, are essential in promoting both retrospective and prospective reflection that pays specific attention to the cultural embeddedness of those reflected upon lives. There is an extensive literature on autobiography in teacher preparation, with regard to pre-service and in-service teacher education (Goodson, 1994), which I do not review in detail. I restrict my 23 observations to some of the assumptions underlying this method of promoting reflective practice. I take two examples, Pinar and Grumet (1976) and Goodson (1981; 1994), from the teacher education literature each of which is frequently cited as a source of inspiration and guidance in thinking about the role of autobiography in promoting retrospective reflection. The influence of psychoanalytic thinking. Pinar and Grumet's (1976) book Wm psychoanalytically inspired text is an example of a source referenced in asserting the role and method of biography in teacher education programs. Seldom noted by authors citing Pinar and Grumet are the limitations of psychoanalytic methods. The regressive or retrospective methods in psychoanalysis have been hailed, by critiques of psychoanalysis, as useful in promoting insight but of questionable use in promoting change in action or practice. The old story goes that after spending three years in psychoanalysis a man discovers that his phobia for darkness has to do with early traumatic experiences. The origin of his fear is discovered, but the fear remains. It is surprising then how this fundamental criticism of psychoanalytic methods, producing insight without change in human action, so widespread even within psychoanalytic circles, remains unremarked upon in the teacher education literature. However, my criticism of the temporally truncated perspective implicit in the current uses of biography are not meant to detract from the crucial role of autobiography in addressing a number of central issues in the experience of pre-service and in-service learning. In particular the use of autobiography in the context of reflection as a social practice is very different from individually oriented psychoanalytic practice. Goodson makes a strong case for the role of 24 autobiography and life history in teacher education as the royal road to understanding teacher learning and helping teachers understand their own learning (Goodson, 1981; Goodson, 1994). Goodson (1994) summarizing the benefits of an autobiographical focus claims that it serves a number of important personal and political functions. Among these benefits are 0 questioning the overly narrow but popular focus on ’practice’ and attendant insufficient attention to the broader context of the teacher’s life, 0 debunking of the timelessness myth of educational practices, 0 sponsoring the teacher’s voice (Goodson, 1991), 0 reframing and rearticulating problems in teaching, 0 understanding the apprenticeship of observation (Lortie, 1975) during the interactive phases of learning to teach, and 0 appreciating the gendered nature of the teaching profession. My point in addressing the commonalty between autobiographical methods and psychoanalytic methods is to highlight their shared retrospective focus. I now turn my attention to the philosophical reasons for the focus on retrospective bias in current enactments of the reflective practitioner model. Temporality and reflection: From a two act to a three act temporal drama. St. Augustine’s well known contemplation on the nature of time provides a useful canvas upon which to sketch some of the ways in which time is implicit in any account of development, change (Valsiner, 1993), or indeed reflection. What then is time? If no one asks me, I know; if I want to explain it to a questioner, I don’t know. But at any rate this is much I dare affirm to know; that if nothing passed there would be no past; if nothing approaching, there would be no future time; if nothing were; there would be no present time. 25 But the two times, past and future, how can they be, since the past is no more and the future is not yet? On the other hand, if the present were always present and never flowed into the past, it would not be time at all but eternity. But if the present is only time, because it flows away into the past, how can we say it is? For it is, only because it will cease to be. (St. Augustine, Confession, XI, 14, cited in Valsiner, 1993, p. 13) For the purposes of this study I will restrict my discussion to (1) the irreversibility of time, (2) the tri-partite nature of present time, and (3) making the future as an example of the constructive nature of human _ development. My purpose in drawing attention to these three themes is to illustrate the unacknowledged temporally distributed nature of reflective thought. The irreversibility of time section outlines how notions of development in psychology and other realms of social sciences have had a very symmetrical, and often very linear, set of foundational assumptions. The next section on the tri-partite nature of time outlines how our usual conception of the past, present and future is a series of ’nows’ on a calibrated time-line. Finally, I present a model of the future which illustrates the way the future is created in the present by various constraining mechanisms. Irreversibility of time The irreversibility of time may seem like an overly abstract concept to be discussing in relation to the development of reflection among prospective teachers. However, this concept is intimately tied to any notion of development, change and prediction. For most of this century the social sciences have been operating on the basis that time is reversible. Social scientists have assumed that a given event in the future can be predicted from the present: that the past is symmetrical with the present and the present with the future. Likewise the present is predicted from the past. The 26 symmetrical relation between past and present, present and future does not imply a linear notion of change, since a cyclical pattern could be repeated, but one where novelty and chance happenings to not seem possible. The present in this case equals the version of -t of the future t. If time is viewed as reversible between present and the past, then it should be equally possible to see it as such between the future and present. (Valsiner, 1993, p. 20) Thinking in such a manner was made possible by the transformation of time into a number (Valsiner, 1993). In summary, this temporal or historical determinism, ”we may even call it the founding myth of classical science” (Prigogine, 1980, p.214), is nondevelopmental in nature and has been widely recognized as inadequate for understanding the problems that physical and social scientists encounter (Prigogine, 1987). Second, conceptualizations of reflection in the teacher education literature have an underdeveloped temporal framework with regard to the relations between the past, present and future dimensions of reflective thought. As St. Augustine’s reflections on interrelations between past, present and future suggest, this is no easy matter. Granted, powerful ideas such as the ’apprenticeship of observation’ (Lortie, 1975) clearly articulate the heavy hand of the past bearing down on present teaching practices, but this alone hardly counts as an elaborate temporal model to think about reflective practice. If anything the ’apprenticeship of observation’ theory, an apprenticeship all novice teachers experience through 15,000 hours of elementary and secondary schooling before entering teacher education, seems to be quiet deterministic: the past defining the present and future. The important role of prior knowledge and experience in learning to teach. 27 Ausubel (1968) asserted that if we had to reduce all of educational psychology to just one maxim, it would be that what a learner already knows is the most important factor in learning (Bennett, 1993). Why is the ’apprenticeship of observation’, and it’s implicit temporal determinism, so compelling to educators be they practitioners or theorists? The importance attributed to prior experience and knowledge is supported by various academic and folk learning theories. Implicit theories, lay theories (W einstein, 1990), world images (Wubbels, 1992) and images (Clandinin, 1986; Connelly 8: Clandinin, 1988; Calderhead 8: Robson, 1991; Johnston, 1992) are among the terms that have been used to identify preservice teachers' prior knowledge and experiences. Research on people's lay theories about social science suggests that these knowledge structures have an important role in people's interpretation of formal scientific knowledge (Fumham, 1988). Extensive research on the role and nature of prospective teachers prior knowledge and experiences and their impact on teacher preparation experiences presents the following set of findings: 0 student teachers enter teaching with "well-worn and common sensical images of the teacher's work" (Britzman, 1986, p. 443) which act as filters for interpreting coursework and field experiences (Anderson, 1984; Buchmann 8: Schwille 1983; Shulman, 1987; Calderhead 8: Robson, 1991). 0 student teachers enter teaching with "firmly rooted images of themselves as teachers, and high ideals and aspirations" (Cole 8: Knowles, 1986, p. 459). 0 prior knowledge and experience are accessed differently by traditional and nontraditional preservice teachers. Traditional college age student teachers rely on their own experiences in school in their constructions 28 of teaching whereas nontraditional preservice teachers tend to rely less on K-12 role models and more on work and family experiences in their constructions of teaching (Bullough 8: Knowles, 1990; Powell, 1992). 0 initial preconceptions and beliefs about teaching remain intact and relatively unchanged despite teacher education coursework and field experiences (Weinstein, 1990; Wubells, 1992). 0 the stability of prior knowledge related to teaching has been attributed to : (i) the 'apprenticeship of observation' (Lortie, 1975) from a socialization perspective, (ii) the stability of procedural knowledge from a cognitive perspective (Anderson, 1983), or (iii) the inability of teacher education coursework to reach the firmly held world images (W ubbels, 1992) from a psychotherapeutic perspective (Watzlawick, 1978) 0 as experiences in the field component of teacher preparation accumulates preservice teachers move from a reliance on past schooling experiences to interactive experiences once teaching begins (Bullough, Knowles, 8: Cole, 1989). The upshot of this widely supported set of conclusions has been a heavy and important emphasis on prior knowledge vis-a-vis learning to teach. This had a two-fold legacy: first, leaving prospective teachers in a deterministic loop, and second, underplaying the importance of the novice teacher’s goals and purposes as they emerge within the various settings in which they learn to teach. Underplaying the role of the future in the literature on learning to teach tends to obscure the emergence of novelty arising from goals and purposes. While, I do not believe that the past, and particularly the apprenticeship of observation, is inconsequential in novice teachers learning to teach it has been given so much attention that the role of the future has 29 been sidelined. Thus, what has been given scant attention is the prospective or anticipatory dimension of learning to teach, which involves hopes, wishes, fears, expectations, and intuitions. The past and future as stories we tell ourselves in the present. And now to come to the core of my argument about the relation between past, present and future. Even though the ”past is no more” (St. Augustine) it has been given an exalted status in research on teacher learning. Because ”the future is not yet” (St. Augustine) it has often been shied away from'for fear of delving into speculation and soothsaying. The key issue then is the stance in the field of teacher education and human development that sees the past as part of the present. It is widely accepted that the past is part of the present through schema based models of memory or the strength of stimulus-response pairings. An equivalent notion of the future-in—the- present is not upheld. My point is that both ”the past and future are stories we tell ourselves in the present” (von Foerster, 1992, pp. 5-6). Taking up this notion of the past and future being part and parcel of the present frames the present as a three-part drama: the past-in-the-present, the immediate present, and the future-in-the-present. In a similar vein Lewin reminds us that ...the psychological field which exists at a given time contains also views of that individual about his future and past. The individual sees not only his present situation; he also has certain expectations, wishes, fears, daydreams for his future. His views about his own past and that of the rest of the social and physical world are often incorrect, but nevertheless constitute, in his life space, the ’reality level’ of the past...it is important to realize that the psychological past and the psychological future are simultaneous parts of the psychological field existing at a given time t. (1943, pp. 302-303) 30 Since I started this section with a quotation from St. Augustine and many authors draw on his ideas in discussing temporality, I will conclude with his model of past, present and future. Augustine put forth a three part view of the present in his model of time which he discusses at some length in Book XI of his Confessions. He spoke of the past in the present through our memories, the immediate present through attention and the future through expectation (I will use the term "imagination" rather than expectation). His model was taken up by later twentieth century authors such as Heiddegger (1927) and Ricoeur (1984). An important dimension of Augustine's temporal framework, not noted in the contemporary literature on temporality that draws on his ideas, is the resolution of the dilemma he identified: how we can understand the past that is gone and the future that is not yet. The distended mind (or maybe today we would say distributed mind) is his resolution. Foreshadowing contemporary notions on distributed cognition, as put forth by Cole (1996) among others (Cole and Engestrt'im, 1993), Augustine sees the mind as temporally distributed. In the context of this study this tri-partite framework presents a useful way of understanding memory and imagination, retrospective and prospective reflection, the past and future as stories the prospective teachers tell themselves in the present. So far the way I have presented the tri-partite model of the present obscures the actual salience of the past-in-the-present, the immediate present, or the future-in-the-present at any given time. Augustine identified two processes that are crucial in furthering differentiating the relations between past, present and future. First, the extent to which time is experienced as a ”concordant whole and at other times as splintered and discordant fragments” (Polkinghorne, 1988, p. 129), and second the inevitability of experiencing the disharmony of time as part and parcel of human existence 3] (Polkinghorne, 1988). For example, in an Intern's teaching practicum the experience of time as discordant might take the form of thinking of the lazy hazy days when he or she was a student unencumbered with the concerns of being the teacher. Alternatively an Intern might imagine, in the present, a fear-inspiring lead teaching experience in the future with the reasonably comfortable present seeming ever so fleeting, transient and precious. An important caveat in counterpointing the past and future is that they are but a breath apart. The subtle manner in which St. Augustine addresses this issue avoids an overly simplistic splicing of time into neat compartments of past, present and future. Expectation refers to the future, and memory to the past. On the other hand, the tension in an act belongs to the present: through it the future is transformed into the past. Hence, an act may contain something that refers to what has not yet come to pass. (cited in Cole, 1993, p. 123) As St. Augustine's musings on time suggest the present becomes the past only "because it ceases to be". Augustine's thoughts on the relationship between past and future through the present illuminate the manner in which "the tension in an act belongs to the present". Having identified the assumptions underpinning the retrospective bias in the reflection literature I now draw on the work of two socio-cultural theorists. First, I outline Valsiner’s writings to address how we literally ’make the future’ in the present. I then draw on Cole and Engestrom (1993) and to understand the complex and counter-intuitive relations between past, present and future in terms of the construct "prolepsis". Common to both Cole and Valsiner's conceptualization of the future in the present is Vygotsky's four level framework encompassing the phylogenetic, the cultural-historical, ontogenetic, and microgenetic levels of human development. These four 32 levels refer to the development of the species, people, person and task respectively. These next two sections will provide a helpful theoretical framework within which the future can be seen as an active part of our present or immediate experience as opposed to the common conception of the future as relatively disconnected from the present. Thus, I adopt a socio- cultural perspective on reflection since it's temporally distributed conception of human cognition/ reflection provides an alternative perspective to the truncated temporal view of reflection pervasive in the field of teacher education. Temporality and reflective thought: A sociocultural perspective on the future-in-the-present. The tri-partite model of temporality: past-in—present, immediate present, and future-in-the present can be seen as threaded together through narrative. Life as semiotically or narratively construed at any given present time has been taken up by a number of authors (Polkinghorne, 1988; Valsiner, 1993; Ricoeur, 1984, 1985, 19913; Brockmeier, 1995). Both Valsiner (1993) and Brockrneier (1995) discuss the role of language in the construction of human temporality. The main rival, Brockrneier (1995) claims, to the idea that our concept of time is intimately tied to language asserts that time is non- linguistically shaped by material rhythms and cycles that shape our lives . These rhythms have to do with the general cycles of biological life, the multilayered rhythm of our social fabric (e.g. the daily routine of work, television schedules, academic semesters, etc). A detailed exposition of the philosophical issues arising from these competing perspectives is beyond the scope of this study. I will restrict my argument to Valsiner’s thesis, that can be 33 summarized as ”making the future in the present: a constraining perspective” (1993, p. 31), favors a semiotic explanation of temporality. Making the future in the present. Valsiner describes the semiotic mediation of the future-in-the—present as the ”process of constraining (both of oneself and others) as a mechanism of ongoing experiencing of the life-world (the microgenetic aspect), and of on- going experiencing of the life-world (ontogenetic aspect) of the individual” (1993, p. 32). It is crucial to note that the term "constraining", as used by Valsiner, does not have any connotation of suppression or disempowerrnent; rather, it is meant to convey a channeling of semiotic and material resources toward ”progressive empowerment” (V alsiner, 1993, p. 32). Within the process of constraining he identifies and describes four sub-processes namely: fossilization of constraints, constructive partitioning of uncertainty fields, multiple domains of constraining, and redundant organization of the constraining process. Fossilization of constraints refers to the process of constructing ”constraints to limit the present degrees of freedom in relationships with the environment in a time bound process” (p. 32). Constructive partitioning of uncertainty fields refers to the process of constraining the here-and-now developing within the flow of uncertainty. Thus it is never the case that an individual is faced with completely random and utterly contextualist world. Multiple domains of constraining refers to the way people, for example, choose a domain such as language to semiotically constrain their experience of the present, and thereby their making of the future. Construing the present in certain ways linguistically and not others eliminates or reduces the chance of some other construals or experiences. The stories we tell ourselves 34 about the present shape what we notice and what we ignore. Valsiner quotes Maturana who describes the constraining function of language in human activity: Human beings can talk about things because they generate the things I they talk about by talking about them. That is, human beings can talk about things because they generate them by making distinctions that specify them in a consensual domain, and because, operationally, talking takes place in the same phenomenic domain in which things are defined as relations of relative neuronal activities in a closed neuronal network. (in Valsiner, 1993, p. 34) Valsiner's perspective on the semiotic mediation of the future-in-the—present draws our attention to the manner in which language, or other signs, we use in the present afford or restrict various construals of the future. Prolepsis. Cole (1992; 1996), also adopting the Vygotskian four level model, makes two critical points with regard to studying the temporally distributed nature of cognition. First, the issue of time in development cannot be meaningfully addressed without examining the hierarchical and embedded nature of the different levels. Second, we need to try and understand the different time- lines including the phylogenetic and cultural-historical course of events within which microgenetic and ontogenetic life courses are embedded. In addition we need to address, when trying to understand the developing mind of one target individual, the co-ontogenetic aspects of development by examining the ontogenetic time frame of others in the target individual’s life- world. Cole uses the term prolepsis to identify the complex interrelationship between past, present, and future taking the case of a mother-child dyad. Past, present and future in the context of embryogenesis 35 Cole makes a case for prolepsis first by claiming that we have a very good understanding of how the past, present and future are related in the context of embryogenesis whereby ”genetic code assembled from the past when sperm and egg unite at conception provides current and future biological constraints within which the biological process of development can take place” (1996, 182). Cole then extends this argument by claiming that ”the end can be in the beginning” if and only if there were constraints on biological development present from birth. The end being in the beginning is not meant in a causal deterministic sense but in a probabilistic sense (Cole, 1996). Cole then extends this argument into the cultural domain using prolepsis as an interpretive framework. Paupresentandmgmrumuontextholepss Cole claims that analogously there exists a similar set of cultural constraints such that ...human interactions with the environment are simultaneously symbolic and material, it is possible for human beings to project prior successful adaptations into the (imagined) future and then embody them as material constraints in the present. (1992, p. 20) His argument that ”the end can be in the beginning” in a cultural context is premised on the notion that in human culture, say in the case of newborns or novice teachers MW W. Prolepsis is the cultural mechanism which brings ”the end into the beginning” or as Webster’s dictionary describes it: ”the representation of a future act or development as being presently existing”. Two applications of this perspective spring to mind with regard to this study. First, in the case of Intern teachers their Collaborating Teachers (CT) might draw on their own remembered experiences of student teaching to construct constraints such as 36 adopting a ’sink or swim’ method of preparing the novice teacher since it was what they perceived as having worked in their own developmental history of learning to teach. Thus the sink or swim model is seen as most consistent with the imagined future of the solo teacher working in his or her classroom. Second, the manner in which a CT presents the curriculum, drawing either on behaviorism's associationist underpinnings a set of building blocks to be assembled and remembered or a network of ideas based on a constructivist epistemology is another example of how the CT's cultural past may greet the novice teacher as his or her cultural future. To summarize, in each of these examples both Coles’ and the two Internship program cases illustrate how a proleptic process draws resources from the past (recollected in the present) in order to set up expectations for the future which are embodied as constraints on the present (e.g., constraints might be ideas mediated linguistically, or material constraints such as lack of money or the demands of the state assessment test). Let me elaborate further on the concept of prolepsis in the context of conversation. This will illustrate how, through prolepsis, in the context of a CT and Intern teacher, the cultural past greets a novice teacher as his or her cultural future. Wm]. Cole (1996) and others (Stone, 1993; Stone 8: Wertsch, 1983) have developed the concept of prolepsis in the context of human development and classroom instruction respectively. Rommetveit (1974) claims that human conversation is ”often strikingly elliptic” (p. 87) in the sense of extreme economy of oral expression, and it is also at times proleptic in the sense that the temporarily shared social world is in part based upon premises tacitly induced by the speaker....What is said serves...to 37 induce presuppositions and trigger anticipatory comprehension, and what is made known will hence necessarily transcend what is said. (p. 87 8: 88) The notion of prolepsis seems a slippery one if what is understood or understandable in conversation depends only on what is uttered verbally. Prolepsis presses one to think about how we can understand more in a conversation than is said, more in a text than is written and feel more than is understood in any situation. This notion of understanding more than is written or said is of major concern to humanistically oriented scholars and they have spoken of it in terms of a ’circle of understanding’ or a ’hermeneutic circle’ (Rommetveit, .1974) wherein an initial reading of a text is extended and enriched by subsequent readings. Rommetveit explains this transcendence of what is written or said in terms of a ”humanistic grasp of meaning and anticipation of potentialities of human existence” (p. 89-90). Thus anticipatory comprehension is intimately tied to the hermeneutic circle of understanding. PW Let me review the notion of prolepsis in the context of the culturally constituted mind. First, it challenges our incremental notions of self and learning based on classical learning theory which tends to convey a simple past to present to future temporal trajectory. Cole makes this point clearly, using the example of the way parents imagine the future of a newborn. Cole (1996) gives the example of how parents in the US in the 1990’s on the birth of a baby daughter might think of her as a future soccer player: a scenario very unlikely if she had been born in the 1950’s. In a similar fashion my brother on the birth of his first child in 1996 drew on his and his wife’s different cultural histories, growing up in Ireland and the USA 38 respectively, to humorously project a certain jockeying for position as to whether the new born might eventually play an All-American game such as baseball or join the fledgling soccer mania in the US. In both examples The adults are not building upon the child’s existing repertoire of behavior and modifying it bit by bit. The baby is, for them, a cultural being, and it is in those terms that they treat it. (1996, p. 186) The culturally constituted mind, as White so eloquently stated, is a ”continuum extending to infinity in both directions” (1942, p. 120). Prolepsis, far from being a minor mechanism in human development is ”a ubiquitous feature of culturally mediated thought” (Cole, 1996, p. 187). While it may be ubiquitous it has received little attention in human development literature. Finally, prolepsis, as a form of anticipatory comprehension, is inherent in human discourse, a point essential to understanding the interview as a research method in this study. Having discussed both the role, limitations, conceptualizations of reflective thought and offered an alternative temporal framework I would now like to turn to the focal teacher education program and describe it's social constructivist orientation to learning and it's goal of promoting reflective practitioners. The Michigan State University teaching Internship: A social constructivist approach to developing reflective practitioners. Different visions of teaching afford and constrain different possible selves by the way they anticipate program outcomes. The Michigan State University teaching internship program has adopted a social constructivist approach to the development of reflective practitioners. As Richardson (1997) notes the mere adoption of a constructivist approach to conceptualizing 39 learning in any teacher education program does not of itself prescribe an instructional agenda since prospective teachers construct knowledge regardless of the instructional approach. However, the promotion of social constructivist learning in the MSU teaching Internship has prompted faculty to emphasize the importance of reflective or instructional conversations (Goldenberg 8: Gallimore, 1991) between collaborating teachers, Intern teachers and university personnel and an inquiry based approach in coursework. Such teaching methods tend to promote active participation by learners. In outlining the social contructivist model I draw attention to the underlying epistemology of the MSU teacher education program since teacher education programs, like any educational endeavor, have either an implicit or explicit epistemological stance. I address the relative importance attached to reflection in culture and teacher education since the attention given to reflection in both spheres inevitably influences any attempts to attend to anticipatory or any other aspect of reflection. Epistemological assumptions underlying teacher education program models. In this section, I identify the main models of teacher education, and then describe MSU’s social constructivist approach to teacher education. While the real world, rarely if ever, presents us with pure forms, model characterizations bear a strong family resemblance to the assumptions, outlooks, and practices of various teacher programs. Three epistemological positions based in the predominant Western folk psychological theories (Bruner, 1996) of learning underlie teacher education program models: the transmission, the constructivist, and the sociohistoric (Case, 1996). Michigan State's social constructivist teacher education program is consistent with the situative-pragmatic or sociohistoric 40 model. Case (1996) delineates three epistemological orientations which have influenced education in the last few hundred years: empiricist, rationalist, and socio-genetic. Greeno, Collins, and Resnick (1996) have characterized these positions as behaviorist-empiricist, cognitive-rationalist, and situative- pragmatic respectively. Two of the three epistemological stances, the empiricist and rationalist, have historically been most influential in education while the sociogenetic has only become influential in the last few years/J Like any educational program or teacher education institution MSU offers certain affordances and constraints based on how it enacts it's vision of teaching. The vision of teaching in the Michigan State University program is in keeping with recent emphasis on teaching as reflective practice. The notion of affordances and constraints is relevant in understanding student teacher learning and development within an organizational setting. As Englert, Tarrant, and Mariage (1992) emphasize dimensions of teaching attended to will be different if the vision of teaching is informed by the process-product literature rather than a social constructivist vision. The teacher education program in which the study took place adopts a social constructivist perspective on teacher learning and development. A move from a vision of student teacher learning as 'solo performance' of discrete behavioral skills to one of 'assisted performance' (Tharp 8: Gallimore, 1988) underpins the program's course design. Extending this vision of learning as 'assisted performance' the program envisions student teachers becoming members of a 'leaming community' of professional educators engaged in reflection as a social practice (Feiman-Nemser 8: Beasley, 1997). We. The 'assisted performance' principle has implications for program enactment and of good teaching, knowledge, 41 relationships, and of standards or outcomes either at the program level or at the level of individual student teachers. First, for example, becoming a good teacher framed within a process-product model looks different than a good teacher from a social constructivist perspective (Englert, Tarrant, Mariage, 1992). The latter may focus more on how any culture provides a certain range of practices prescribed as good teaching. Second, an extended mentoring relationship over a two semester Internship in teaching and course work designed to weave university based knowledge and that of practitioners are two focal points of program planning. Both of these emphases, position the novice teacher, the collaborating teacher and university personnel in a more relationally intense inquiry oriented milieu than in programs with an underlying rational-technical approach to the development of professional practice. W. The social constructivist vision of teaching as the institutional / professional identity the program expects Interns to approach or reach is encapsulated in the program standards for Interns. Consistent with the general trend in education toward standards- referenced (Gipps, 1994) assessment "the program standards represent understandings, skills, commitments, dispositions necessary to be an effective beginning teacher" (Michigan State University: College of Education, p.37). The four program standards are, (i) knowing subject matter and how to teach them, (ii) working with students, '(ii) creating and managing a classroom learning community, (iv) working and learning in a school and profession. The fourth standard relating to working and learning in a school and profession is an overarching goal of the teacher preparation program. The sub-goals under this standard are (a) works well as a teacher in a school community, (b) works collaboratively with his/ her MSU Liaison, 42 collaborating teacher and seminar instructors in ways that support his/ her learning, (C) mflfifiifi on his/ her experience and seeks opportunities for continued learning and improvement, (iv) is open to alternatives and constructive feedback. The third sub-goal highlights the centrality of reflection, both as a means and an end, in the MSU teacher preparation program. It clearly set the expectation that Interns be reflective about their practice both individually and collectively. Having established the critical role reflection is deemed to play in MSU the teacher preparation program I will now focus on the program's instructional principles (see Table 2) and practices based on a Vygotskian or socio-cultural theory (Vygotsky, 1978; Luria, 1976; Wertsch, 1985a; Werstch, 1985b; van der Veer 8: Valsiner, 1985; M011, 1990; Tudge 8: Winterhoff, 1993; Daniels, 1993; Daniels, 1996; Cole, 1996). I have chosen this model since it incorporates many of the ideas either implicit or explicit in the enactment of the teacher education program at Michigan State University that I have observed and been part of over the last four years. Many course syllabi in the departments teacher education program generally acknowledge a social constructivist stance to learning and often specifically seek to enact classroom activities based on principles from this perspective. For example, in pursuit of reflection as a social practice, both a process and goal, considerable emphasis is put on peer collaboration and the role of both language and conversation between the various partners in Internship program in promoting reflective teaching. In summary, the reflective practitioner orientation of the MSU teacher education program seems most consistent with the notion of reflection as a social practice. pregmm. The move from solo to assisted performance reflects a socio—genetic or social constructivist epistemology. Here the image of good teaching and 43 learning to teach is one involving inquiry, collaboration, instructional conversations and responsive instruction. Englert et al describe good teachers from a social constructivist perspective as those who involve students in classroom dialogues about cognitive processes rather than relying on seatwork and independent practice to develop students abilities to self-regulate. (1992, p. 73) In the context of preoservice teacher education the role of the collaborating teacher is to provide the design environment in which new ideas can be tested in a collegial setting with an emphasis more on modeling and coaching than a focus on either scrutiny of behavioral competencies or exposition of expert knowledge. The role of the novice teacher is to work in an apprenticeship like situation observing, conversing, and trying out ideas and strategies within a sheltered workshop setting. This mentor-mentee dyad has been characterized by Dembele (1995) as a cognitive apprenticeship involving modeling, coaching and fading (Newman, Griffin, 8: Cole, 1989). The emphasis then is not on providing a ’pure’ real world experience, although the sheltered workshop setting may approximate it, rather the focus is on the quality of action and conversation about pedagogical and educational issues. These conversations ideally address curriculum, the students’ progress, pedagogical content knowledge, purposes of lessons and units, the school mission, the school within the community, and the school in the broader society context. Obviously, specifying the conversational content alone is insufficient to characterize well this move toward assisted performance. After all, teachers and student teachers in a traditional oriented program may address each of these conversational topics in private reflection. The critical difference is the emphasis on collaborative inquiry and reflection. In this scenario what is critical is not the application of theory but the conversation between theory and practice. The principles and practices of teacher education from a Vygotskian perspective are illustrated in Table 2. The widely held assumption in the MSU teacher education program is that reflection as a higher mental function originates through social interaction and later becomes a psychological phenomenon. This principle is based on Vygotsky’s second general law of genetic development. The other principles outlined in Table 2 flow from this principle. In terms of practice the MSU Teacher Education (TE) program places a premium on instructional conversations through which higher levels of reflection may be internalized by prospective teachers. However despite the heavy emphasis on reflection in the TB program reflection is often seen by Interns as less immediate and secondary to their 45 Table 2 Promoting Reflective Practice from a Vygotskian Perspectivel Principles from Vygskian theory 1 Implication for Teacher Education I ‘ 1. Reflection as a higher mental Attention needs to be paid to the function originates on social quality of interactions between interaction and later becomes a personnel involved in teacher psychological phenomenon preparation program in their work with novice teachers (Tharp 8: I. a. Intemalization/ appropriation Gallimore, 1988) consists of a series of transformations I. a. Provision of scaffolded interpsychological experiences for novice teachers as a means of fostering reflective thought and practice H. Conscious realization of one's Promotion of teacher's own mental functions is metacognitive processes as a way of characteristic of higher order promoting self-regulation ‘ thinking III. Elementary mental processes are The promotion of rglaon is subject to the control of the consistent with the promotion of environment whereas higher self-regulation psychological processes are subject to self-regulation W. Higher order thinking is based Encouraging teachers to consciously on the conscious use of verbal (or use verbal mediation as a strategy to other mediational means) mediation direct their own actions/ practice as a (Diaz 8: Berk, 1992; John-Steiner, means of promoting reflective 1992) practice in response to teaching situations I Adapted from Manning, B. H., 8: Payne, B. D. (1993, p.363) WW 4, 361-371. 46 urgent classroom concerns. The on-going dilemma between reflection and action can be seen within a broader cultural setting in which experience rather than reflection is viewed by prospective teachers as the main arena in which learning occurs. The central role of field experience as a folk theory about learning to teach I now turn to the role of field experience in the focal teacher education program: the four year old eight month long teaching Internship at Michigan State University. I address the problems related to the way field experiences are generally construed in the context of developing reflective practitioners. I discuss the central role attributed to the field experience component of teacher education by prospective teachers and teachers and school personnel. This discussion is important since it draws attention to the way folk pedagogy or cultural beliefs about the field experience component of teacher education programs can influence enactment of field experiences. The centrality of field experiences has been long acknowledged in professional education but actually understanding what goes on during this watershed experience has been problematic (McIntyre, Byrd, 8: Foxx, 1996). This pivotal position occupied by field experience in learning to teach has not been lost on those advocating educational reform since such movements generally call for some reconfiguration of teacher education generally and field experience specifically. A Spring 1997 article in TIME magazine entitled ’A New Lesson Plan’ on teacher education reform, which focused on the University of Cincinnati year long internship program, quoted US. Secretary of Education, Richard Riley, as saying Though you prepare for teaching by taking courses, the best preparation is teaching itself. To learn with the support of master teachers is 47 absolutely critical, and I think teaching colleges are beginning to realize this. (1997, p. 76) This quote from Secretary Riley illustrates a staunchly held folk theory that learning to teach is best done by teaching: ”the best preparation for teaching is teaching itself”. However, his remarks also include a new theme in teacher education namely the guiding and coaching role of the experienced teacher: ”to learn with the support of master teachers”. But the kernel of his message is that experience is the best teacher: field experience is primary. Overall, Secretary Riley’s remarks identify the three main components of teacher education programs: coursework, teaching practice, and support by experienced teachers. Of these three the support and guidance of experienced teachers has been underexploited traditionally in teacher education where there has been an emphasis on solo learning and performance. Secretary Riley's claim that "the best preparation is teaching itself" echoes a widespread and staunchly held theory about learning to teach. Indeed, this belief about the primacy of action forms a powerful anticipatory schema for prospective teachers engaged in teacher education programs. It also raises the relationship between experience and reflection in teacher education. Regardless of what aspect of reflection be it in terms of domains, levels, or temporal emphasis the MSU internship program Interns and faculty are influenced by folk theories vis-a-vis the relative roles of experience and reflection while learning to teach. WWW Field exPeriences were instituted long before there was a any substantial effort at theorizing about their role (Guyton 8: McIntyre, 1990), which bequeathed an almost exclusive focus on doing at the expense inquiry, reflection or contemplation. Reflection has entered the fray at two levels: first at the level of examining 48 program assumptions by teacher educators and second as the desired process and outcome of many contemporary teacher education programs. Both of the process and outcome dimensions of reflection are central to the MSU teaching internship. However, on the broader cultural canvas reflection is generally, at least in Western cultures, brushed aside in favor of action This special situation of knowing we know is traditionally elusive for our Western culture. We are keyed to action and not to reflection, so that our personal life is generally blind to itself. (Maturana 8: Varela, 1987, p. 24) The current emphasis on reflection can be generally seen as a move in culture involving a inward looking self-examining stance (Gergen, 1991 ) and more specifically with regard to teacher education it (Schtin, 1983, 1987; van Manen, 1995) can be seen as an antidote to the exclusive emphasis on behavior or performance in some teacher ’training’ programs (Cruickshank 8: Metcalf, 1990). Those advocating reflective practitioner models of teacher education view teaching as a cultural and communicative art with a concomitant focus on human action as purposive behavior. mmmmmummmmmm. Research on field experiences has highlighted their problematic influence and mixed messages (Guyton 8: McIntyre, 1990; Hulin-Austin, 1990). On the one hand student teachers value field experiences almost universally as the most useful component of their programs, on the other hand teacher educators are concerned about the unreflective reproduction of teaching practices well learned during the ’apprenticeship of observation’ (Lortie, 1975). This concern is not mainly about student teachers mimicking their co-operating teachers but rather replaying the past or reincarnating the apprenticeship models despite the new setting and heightened awareness of role that is part and parcel of learning to teach. Furthermore, during field experiences both 49 student teachers and teacher educators are often caught in a dilemma whether they ought to celebrate or seek to change teaching practices they see in classrooms. There is, however, another problem with experience and it is at the level of the folk theories widely held about experience as ’the’ vehicle for learning to teach. Buchmann and Schwille (1983) call this the ’finitude of experience’. They characterize this widely held folk theory about learning to teach from experience as follows Firsthand experience is trusted implicitly as both the means and content of education. It is supposed to be down-to—earth, personal, and practical. Ideas encountered in books are pale in contrast. Compared with life as a school of hard knocks, the school of hard books seems irrelevant and ineffective. Immersion in the ’real world’ teaches people ’what is what’. (p- 485) They continue by criticizing this widely held folk theory about learning to teach from experience with an emphasis on how Those who want to learn about the world of work firsthand often do not challenge limits set by present occupations and social structures. (p. 485) They suggests a solution in the form of a plea for how books and art might be used to give a better access to the real world than firsthand experience. In later work Floden and Buchmann suggest that a break with experience as the modal journey in learning to teach (Floden 8: Buchmann, 1987). In conclusion, the preeminent place given to field experience in folk theories about teacher preparation acts as a powerful anticipatory scheme influencing prospective teachers intellectual commitment to coursework and their 50 convictions about the final court of appeal on what counts as the ultimate place to learn how to teach. Anticipation and teacher education The conception of anticipation varies depending on the epistemology underpinning teacher education programs. Anticipation does not arise as an 'issue from a behavioral perspective. In both the cognitive and socio-cultural frameworks anticipation can be viewed as part of teacher cognition with the former emphasizing the teachers individual anticipatory schemata (Neisser, 1976) and the latter the contextual scaffolds that might afford or constrain certain anticipations. Neisser (1976), describing and defending (1978) his theory of mental images, following Ryle (1950), asserts that images we have in our minds are anticipations. Anticipatory schemata, Neisser claims, are a necessary for perception to occur since these schemata are attuned to information and then can direct explorations to make the information more accessible. Without going into his theory in detail I will note two issues that pertain to this study. Neisser views images, even if they are not the same as the actual object or person imagined, as "preparation for seeing these phenomena...". People describe images differently than they would describe objects, but this does not refute the possibility that the images are the inner aspects of preparation to see those objects” (1978, p. 173). This powerful idea when applied to the case of anticipatory reflection in teaching implies that anticipatory reflection far from being merely speculative, guides the seeing. So an Intern who anticipates discipline as her main fear maybe more attuned to seeing events and interactions as disciplinary issues. In a very real sense then, understanding Interns’ anticipations is about understanding their 51 ”preparation for seeing” or planning for perception. Second, while disputing Hampson and Morris' and (1978) claim that all unfulfilled expectation results in surprise Neisser draws attention to the relationship between anticipation and surprise. Anticipation from a socio-cultural perspective must be understood through mind in culture as illustrated earlier in Cole's view of prolepsis and Valsiner's portrayal of how we make the future-in-the-present. Within the MSU teacher education program the Interns capacity to anticipate, imagine and ‘plan for the future, can be thought of in two ways. Given the importance attached to prospective teachers exploring their pedagogical biographies the program acknowledges in practice the central role of prior knowledge and experiences in the construction of filters or schernas through which teacher candidates interpret their coursework and field experiences. In addition the emphasis put on collaborating teachers apprenticing Interns into ways of seeing classroom life and planning curriculum draw attention to the content of mentoring conversations as a means through which Interns develop in their capacity to imagine and plan for the future. Feiman-Nemser and Beasley (1997), in a detailed study of one MSU collaborating teacher-intern teacher dyad identified the conversational content of a planning meeting as consisting of designing learning activities (42%), coaching (16%), exploring content (38%), and clarifying roles (4%). In summary there has been a change toward a more social epistemology among teacher educators whereby reflective practice is viewed as a social practice rather than acts of solo cognition. The adoption of a more social epistemology will influence efforts to promote any aspect of reflection. In addition within the current focus on reflection, be it viewed either solo or as a social practice, there is an ambivalence about how reflection is viewed in 52 society which impacts the relative importance attributed to action and reflection in professional education. Summary This chapter situated anticipation both within the reflective practitioner model of teacher education and prominent frameworks on the preactive dimensions of teaching. I critiqued the temporally truncated retrospective focus in current enactments of the reflective practitioner model of teacher education. I then presented a sociocultural perspective on reflection since it offers a more temporally distributed framework on reflection. Finally, I described the internship to situate the programs reflective practitioner orientation within traditions and practices of teacher education. Given this study's focus on the internship field experience component of the teacher education program I addressed the problems related to the way field experiences are construed in the context of educating reflective practitioners. I have made the case generally, as many others have, for the importance of reflection in the education of teachers. More specifically I have argued for increased the presence of anticipatory reflection in teacher preparation coursework and field experience. This is not meant to sweep away the important role biographical and retrospective oriented methods play in teacher education programs and more broadly in the politics of teacher education. Rather, this reconfiguration of the relationship between retrospective and prospective reflection revives Dewey’s emphasis in his writings on reflection. Our judgment turns backward for it’s material: something has turned out differently than we anticipated, and so we think back to disCover what was the matter. But while the material of the judgment comes to 53 us from the past, what really concerns us is what we shall do the next time; the function of reflection is prospective. (Dewey, 1932, 1960, p.14) Thus, I am making a case for studying the anticipatory dimensions of reflection more deliberately as a precursor to integrating activities that make it more central in conceptualizations of reflection, in field experience and coursework. 54 CHAPTER 3 LIVING A DESIGN: TOOLS AND TALES, TALES AND TOOLS In the following pages I describe how I developed a design, incorporated tales or narrative analysis as an analytic tool (tools and tales) and recount the study as tales of tools including the use of both interview and imagery as data co-authoring tools. I commenced this study with a number of assumptions and a working design, yet the study also evolved to address additional topics (e.g., the issue of surprise as the unanticipated), that emerged from my analysis of the first and second set of interviews and the previously unspecified uses of imagery and drawings as tools in the second and third focus group sessions. Thus, I lived a design in the sense that it grew, in large part, out of my analysis and reflections over the course of the study. Now I am not claiming that I cobbled together a study on the morning of each phase of interviewing. Rather, I entered this study with clear ideas about my questions, initial design, and mode of analysis but was also seeking ways to learn from my conversations with the Interns and my reflections en route about the phenomena of anticipatory reflection or prospective teachers' orientation to the future. My main assumptions at the beginning of the study were: that student teachers are oriented toward the future phenomenologically as a new career looms on the horizon, that the construct of possible selves involving hopes, fears, and expectations might be useful in bringing forth and understanding anticipatory reflection, and that there would be some changes in anticipatory reflection over the course of the Internship. Having assumptions does not imply that a researcher enters a study with preconceived ideas. Rather I view my assumptions as particular 55 sensitivity with which I commenced this work. Malinowski makes, what I think is, an important distinction between preconceived ideas and foreshadowed problems and their respective roles in hindering or helping scientific inquiry Good training in theory, and acquaintance with its latest results is not identical with being burdened with 'preconceived ideas' ....Preconceived ideas are pernicious in any scientific work, but foreshadowed problems are the main endowment of a scientific thinker, and these problems are first revealed to the observer by his theoretical studies (Malinowski, 1922, pp. 8-9) I might add here that the interplay between my theoretical studies and practice as a teacher educator helped in the development of a foreshadowed problem around the theme of anticipation while learning to teach. With regard to methodology I was drawn to thinking about how I would benefit from thinking about my interview data as both a representation of Interns thinking and in a presentational and performative sense as co-constructed texts. By representation I mean the way in which research on teaching assumes an isomorphism between thoughts or beliefs and the language to describe them (Freeman, 1994). This stance claims we can look through language, as if words are a transparent window into teachers' thinking. An alternative and increasingly compelling view is that language is used in a presentational or performative sense and the socio-linguistic context makes a difference in what is said, what is not said and to whom it is said or not said. In the following pages I describe how I used these assumptions, which grew out of both my graduate coursework and fieldwork with prospective teachers over the last few years to address the issue of anticipatory reflection among Intern teachers. 56 Researeh design everview The study involved a series of one-to-one and focus group interviews with six Intern teachers in two schools over a six month period during the latter two thirds of the Internship program. This design incorporated settings where both individual and collective reflection were examined. The contrasting school settings helped highlight the influence of social contexts on the construction of novice teachers' anticipatory reflection. One of the schools was in an urban setting and the other in a suburban setting. The study commenced three months into the Internship, at the end of the first phase of lead teaching in early December 1996, and continued through the end of the Internship in April 1997. The series of three one-to-one and focus group interviews provided autobiographical data on each Intem’s development. Questions pertained to the influence of role models and critical incidents that contributed to the development of particular modes of thinking about teaching, and the hopes, fears and expectations among Intern teachers at three stages during the Internship in teaching. During the three focus group meetings, held during the Guided Practice seminars, I both listened for and explicitly addressed anticipatory reflection issues with the Interns both in the Fall and Spring. The series of one-to-one interviews with six Intern teachers, three in each school, provided a detailed description of evolving Intern teachers' hopes, fears and expectations as an entry point in understanding anticipatory reflection. This design was intended to address the following two questions: (i) what are the developmental dynamics of anticipatory reflection over the two semester Internship, and (ii) to what can these be attributed? In addition the focus on Interns in two contrasting settings, I hoped, would give a sense of the variability and range in hopes, fears and expectations among Intern 57 teachers in specific settings as well as provide data on the encounters in the school setting that contribute to the construction of anticipatory reflection. In the following sections related to the study design I describe: (i) the two school settings, (ii) my stance as a researcher in this study, (iii) the rationale for the phenomenological approach taken in the study, (iv) the timing of the interviews, (v) the content and format of the one-to-one interviews, and (vi) the content and format of the focus group sessions. ContexLansLSettiugs IhLlntemshinmgram The length and format of student teaching varies dramatically around the world. For example, Morris (1998) notes how Japanese student teachers spend two weeks during pre-service education engaged in a practicum-like experience. In many other countries a period of about fifteen weeks of student teaching is typical (Morris, 1998). Teaching internships appeared in the US in the 1950's to allow returning veterans entry into the teaching profession (Smith 8: Souviney, 1997). The thirty week teaching Internship which is the focus of this study is considerably longer than the vast majority of teaching practica in the USA. or others countries. The focal teaching internship program has sought to foster a teacher preparation program with mentorship, through 'guided participation' (Rogoff, 1990), of Intern teachers by both collaborating teachers and university teacher educators as a guiding principle of program design. Teacher Interns undertake a two-semester teaching internship in one collaborating teacher's classroom starting in September and finishing the following April. They spend four days per week in the classroom initially observing, then teaching small groups and finally taking on more and more responsibility during a 58 period of Guided Lead Teaching in November with a final eight week block of Lead Teaching in February and March of the Winter/ Spring semester. Once per week all Interns in a given school meet in a two hour Guided Practice Seminar with a university supervisor, the term used is "university liaison", and their fellow Interns at that school site to discuss problems of practice. The fifth day of the week is spent taking two half-day classes at the university related to curriculum and professional issues. The role of anticipation and efforts to promote anticipatory reflection, planning and imagining the future, may seem like an uphill battle given the strong cultural beliefs that privilege experience over reflection. Within the teacher education program Interns' capacities to plan and imagine the future are fostered both within coursework which includes lesson and unit planning in four subject matter areas: science, literacy, mathematics, and social studies. Rather than a focus on generic cross domain teaching skills planning is taught within subject domains. WWW Having worked in the teacher education program, both as a university school liaison supervising Interns and as a course instructor over the three years prior to commencing this research seemed to facilitate my entry to both the program and sites in which this research took place. I initiated contact with faculty directing and co-ordinating the teacher education cohort programs and was advised to submit an abstract of my proposed research to the Academic Planning and Program Committee in the Department of Teacher Education. Once my initial proposal to engage in research within the Internship program was approved I worked with one of the four teacher education teams. The Teacher Education department split into four teams a number of years ago with the intention of providing a cohort experience for student teachers 59 where there would be a chance for faculty and students alike to develop more long term productive educational relationships rather than the likelihood of more sporadic and random encounters in larger programs. One administrator suggested a site for the suburban setting I sought in this study. I chose the urban setting based on my prior knowledge and experience with urban schools close to the university over the previous three years. I met with the University-School Liaisons (supervisors of the field placement) at both sites and outlined my plan for the research project in general. Once both Liaisons had tentatively agreed to integrating the study with their Guided Practice seminar I suggested that I visit a Guided Practice seminar and present the proposed study and outline the commitment I was . asking from the Interns over the following five to six months. Both of these information sessions for Interns lasted about half an hour during a Guided Practice seminar two weeks prior to the commencement of data collection. I described my proposed research trying to 'sell' the project, noting both the extra commitment on their part as well as the potential benefits that might accrue to them through participation. On this latter theme I suggested that giving them my transcriptions of the interviews could be useful for their on- going reflection as well as a text to revisit in subsequent interviews. Both the urban and suburban site had five Interns at the time of the informational meetings. Three Interns in the urban site and four in the suburban site agreed to be part of the study. However, after the first focus group meeting in this latter site two more Interns said they were willing to be included in the focus group part of the study since they found the discussion during this first focus group meeting very interesting. When I refer to the city school site I use the name, CityVille, and BurbVille to signify the suburban site / community. 60 {-10 -.‘ o 1.0. o."_r: , .. :. :or ' ' . 11.1w0uld like to present my stance in this study by tracing briefly my experience of the main traditions of research in teacher education. This biographical section conveys the various ways I have been both drawn toward and influenced by different traditions of research. There have been a number of intellectual traditions in social science that have underpinned teacher education research each of which I have been influenced by over the last fourteen years that I have been involved in education both as a pre-service teacher and primary teacher in Ireland as well as a graduate student in the US. Zeichner and Gore (1990) identified three of these traditions as the functionalist, interpretative and critical schools of thought and examined the contribution of each at three phases of teacher socialization namely: prior to formal preservice training, during preservice training, and finally, socialization that occurs in the workplace culture. I will also address the advent of post-structuralist thinking in educational research. The post-structuralist movement has been particularly influential in the last ten years and I have come into contact with it’s ideas and practices as a doctoral student. The W is rooted in the tradition of sociological positivism (Comte, 1853; Durkheim, 1938). According to Zeichner and Gore, Functionalism is a view which is characterized by a concern for providing explanations of status quo, social order, consensus, social integration, solidarity, need satisfaction, and actuality. It approaches those general sociological concerns from a standpoint which tends to be realist, positivist, determinist, and nomothetic. Functionalism is based on a conception of science which emphasizes the possibility of objective inquiry capable of providing true explanatory and predictive knowledge of an external reality (p. 2). 61 Zeichner describes this approach as realist in the sense that it supports the status quo, positivist in both the methods it employs and predictive intent, determinist in postulating an all-pervasive and overwhelming 'influence' on empty vessels such as teachers in schools under the power of social forces, and nomothetic in the identification of universal principles which govern, for example, teaching practice. My memories of my undergraduate teacher education program bring back articles and ideas from the functionalist perspective. Kounin’s model of classroom management as well as research on teacher effectiveness emanating from what I now understand to be the process-product research tradition (Good 8: Brophy, 1986) with it's focus on discrete teaching skills and their relationship to achievement outcomes of students falls within a functionalist perspective. My exposure to the functionalist tradition was only one among several as an undergraduate. Whereas research reports and chronicles of research traditions may cast these schools of research as discrete and analytically separable, they are often intermingled, as in my case, as part of socialization into teaching. Second, Zeichner and Gore (1990) identify the Web based in the Germanic / Teutonic idealist tradition of social theory (Dilthey, 1976; Husserl, 1973; Weber, 1927) and challenging the "validity of the ontological assumptions which underwrite functionalist approaches" (Burrell 8: Morgan, 1979, p.32). In the interpretive tradition there is a common concern to understand the nature of the social world through the subjective experience of people. According to Burrell and Morgan (1979) this approach seeks explanation "within the realm of individual consciousness and subjectivity, within the frame of reference of the participant as opposed to the observer of action" (p. 28). Zeichner and Gore describe this approach as nominalist in the belief that the social world as mainly existing through the 62 names, concepts, and labels used by participants, antipositivist in the rejection that human affairs can be studied and understood as the natural world is studied, voluntarist that individuals are recognized as capable of making choices and having plans and aspirations, and finally, ideographic in the focus on subjective accounts of experience. The teacher thinking research of the last two decades (Shavelson, 1976; Clark 8: Peterson, 1986; Clark, 1986; Day, Pope, 8: Denicolo, 1990; Day, Calderhead, Denciolo, 1993) is closely aligned to an interpretive perspective. Caldherhead (1996) summarized the move from functionalist to interpretive research on teaching as follows The research on teaching in the late 19605 was strongly characterized by a behaviorist stance that sought to describe teaching in terms of sequences of behavior, and then to investigate the relationship between that behavior to children’s learning. The research in the next two decades, however, became far more concerned with how teachers understand their work and thought processes, judgments, and decisions that their work involves. (p. 709) Zeichner and Gore identify a third strand, the mm with two main trends: one emphasizing reproduction and structure (Althusser, 1976; Bowles and Gintis, 1976) and the other emphasizing production and agency (Giroux, 1981). Critical theory was the tradition I most engaged in and was inspired by as an undergraduate in it’s critique of societal inequities, the banking concept of education, and emancipatory pedagogy as articulated so powerfully in Freire’s Bedagegyefjheflppressed. Weiler (1988) outlines a critical theorists' stance as recognizing that it is important to acknowledge the intended role of schools as apparatuses of social reproduction and sites of cultural reproduction at a high level of theoretical abstraction; we need to keep in mind the relationship of schools to the wider society and to recognize the realities of class and gender [and race] relationships in terms of power and control. But at the same time, the acts of resistance, negotiation, 63 and contestation of individuals in the production of meaning and culture must also be recognized (p. 24). People are thus recognized as both shaping and being shaped by culture. Furthermore, a critical stance seeks to engage in research that attempts to bring to consciousness that which is generally submerged in everyday life. Class, gender, and race, the definers of society's lines of stratification, are acutely examined, aiming at social transformation toward greater justice, equality, freedom and human dignity (Zeichner 8: Gore, 1990). Research within this perspective emphasizes the central importance of collaboration and participation between researchers and participants. Finally, reality is viewed as socially created and sustained (Zeichner 8: Gore, 1990). Zeichner and Gore did not describe a fourth intellectual tradition, post; Wham, which has been gathering momentum during the last decade in educational research (Usher 8: Edwards, 1994). Critical theory is different from post-structuralism in that the former assumes that there are structures that are identifiable and possibly changeable in society while the latter doubts that there are such structures. Premised on the notion that there is no core or center, post-structuralism challenges those who go in search of a Holy Grail or core structures that the search is in vain. Given what Derrida (Kearney, 1986) described as the endless deferral and dispersal of meaning, researchers are prey to a Russian roulette of meaning. The influence post-structuralism has had on my teaching is in the wariness it has fostered in my thinking toward totalizing discourses. By totalizing discourses I mean grand theories that seem to be taking on the status of a master narrative and come to exclusively dominate a domain of inquiry in either education or psychology. However post-structuralist theory seems problematic since it seems to eschew any notion of progress central to many educational reform efforts. In addition, a central question raised by many post-structuralists, namely power, is one I have become more vividly aware of as a researcher and teacher. However, as Roseneau (1992) notes, there is a certain irony in that just as minority groups are for the first time finding their voice these same voices are. subject to deconstructionist criticisms that vaporize any nascent sense of agency. [1 l' . ll 1 l l l . For a long time the study of teachers and teaching took an objectivist stance toward learning about the lives and work of teachers. Such work often only involved researchers making brief, more often than not, brief skirmishes into a school to get what is needed and leave without any return for the participants. I sought to do two things in this design of this study from it’s earliest stages. First, I wanted to gain an understanding of the vagaries of the Intern’s experience during a challenging period of their lives both personally and professionally through extended contact with the participants. Second, while I was eager to ’get the data’ I wanted to also make a contribution to each Interns' experience as well as make a contribution to the work of the university personnel working in both schools with the Interns. I took the challenge of making a contribution seriously by first not trying to get in the Interns' way. Much like the Hippocratic Oath stipulates that doctors do no harm ("primum num nocere") I also sought not to hinder the work of the Interns. For example, during the period of lead teaching in the Spring I shortened the interview to about an hour and was careful to let each Intern know that I saw it as my responsibility to work around their schedules since they were gracious enough to give up their time to take part in the study. I also promised, and gave them, a large portion of the transcript from the 65 interviews which some of them used in their coursework related projects and professional portfolios. Comments the Interns made in the one-to-one interviews as well as feedback from the liaison in each school suggest that the Interns found my intervention had a positive impact on their Internship experience. IQ celebrate er change teachers? The recent focus on teacher’s lives as interwoven with their work is a new conceptualization of what it means to understand teachers and teaching. As Goodson (1994) points out it is naive to suggest that the adoption of qualitative methods or interpretative methods per se signaled an era when the work of teacher’s was better understood or given a sympathetic hearing. Goodson (1994) cites the history of the early use of case studies as an example of how research in education tended to take a sympathetic view of everyone in the educational endeavor but teachers. Today the tide has turned and while many interpretative oriented studies try to understand students' experiences many also seek a greater appreciation and sense of teachers’ work. However, an uncritically sympathetic view of teaching and teachers is just as undesirable as a unsympathetically critical stance. What is optimal, in my view, is a position of critical sympathy where celebrating teachers’ work and contributing to change in teaching practices are equally worthy aims. W No one qualitative method or orientation has the high ground in understanding teachers’ experiences. Many approaches could be recommended to a researcher in his or her endeavor to bring forth a useful understanding of teachers. However, for the purposes of this study I adopt a phenomenological approach. The main point of phenomenological psychology is to understand the life experience (Lebensweldt) of informants or participants in a research study (Giorgi, 1995). 66 Phenomenological psychology (Giorgi, 1970; Giorgi, 1995) was inspired by the work of phenomenological philosophers such as Husserl, Merleau-Ponty, and Heidegger in Continental Europe during the 1930’s, 40’s and 50’s. Among these Husserl is most frequently identified as the founder of phenomenology. More recently Merleau-Ponty’s work on embodiment has been very influential in constructing a bridge between cognitive science and human experience (Varela, Thompson, 8: Rosch, 1991). A related approach to phenomenological psychology is phenomenography (Marton, . 1981 ; Uijens, 1992). Uijens differentiates the lineage of phenomenological psychology and , phenomenography noting that the former was inspired by Husserl and other phenomenological philosophers but the latter grew out of the holistically oriented work of Gestalt psychologists. Within North American psychology phenomenology has been most influential in the area of non-directive counseling through the work of Carl Rogers (1961), one of the leaders in the field of humanistic psychology and client-centered therapy. Three ideas from the phenomenological stream of literature seem most pertinent to elaborate on in the context of this study: (i) lived-world experience, (ii) bracketing, and (iii) researcher stance. 1. Lived World Experience (Lebensweldt). Growing out of Husserl and Merleau-Ponty’s emphasis on understanding human experience by being-in- the-world, researchers have been drawn toward getting close to the ’lived experience’ of research participants. This notion of getting close to the life of a person, group or community has long been the method of choice among anthropologists but only been broadly appreciated within psychology in the last twenty years (Giorgio, 1995). For example, Bronfennbrenner, one of the most influential figures in ecological psychology, strongly advocated for the adoption of more phenomenological method stating that 67 Very few of the external influences significantly affecting human behavior can be described solely in terms of objective behavior and development and events; the aspects of the environment that are most powerful in shaping the course of psychological growth are overwhelmingly those that have meaning to the person in a given situation. (Bronfenbrenner, 1979, p. 22) More recently Varela, Thompson, and Rosch (1991) have asserted the importance of Merleau-Ponty’s notion of embodiment as a fundamental tenet of phenomenology in their advocacy of a fruitful dialogue between the sciences of the mind and human experience. Merleau—Ponty's concern was with the manner in which the fragmentation within academia was splintering research on human experience into different non-communicating departments (sociology, anthropology, and psychology).j According to Varela, Thompson, and Rosch (1993) the debate in social science about everyday human experience vacillates between one or other version of one-sidedness. On the one hand there are those who claim that cognitive science will eventually overcome our immature human self understanding; on the other hand, ”there can be no science of the human life- world because science must always presuppose it” (Varela, Thompson, Rosch, 1993, p. 13). Thus the debate about lived world experience has fallen within a larger debate about the validity of subjective experience in social sciences. In the 1940’s a summary document ’The use of personal documents in psychological science’ was authored by Gordon Allport (1942) and published by the Social Science Research Council in the United States. This document addressed both the varied use and respect for the validity of ’personal’ documents in sociology, history, anthropology, and psychology. Allport concluded that such documents, be they written or oral, were especially suited for the purposes of understanding the ”complexities of phenomenal 68 consciousness” (1942, p. 37). In anticipation, according to Yans-McLaughlin (1990), of criticism from objectivists he responded that often the best way to find out about people’s motives, experiences, and thoughts was: ”Why not ask them?”. 2. Bracketing. Bracketing is the phenomenological stance of holding back or blocking out one’s presuppositions when entering into the life world of another person or community. The intention with bracketing is to allow the other’s world View to seep into the consciousness of the researcher. Total bracketing seems both unwise and impossible. Since the researcher inevitably has a standpoint. This rather obvious point seems to have been less clearly understood and taken into account in the early phenomenologically inspired research literature. I will distinguish between a strong and a weak view of bracketing with my stance favoring the latter. Nowadays the writings of critical theorists and feminist scholars has drawn acute attention to the l standpoint of the researcher: we cannot have ”a view from nowhere” (Nagel, 1986). Nowhere can be the strong view of bracketing in which we see the world of the other naturally though immersion in their world. Nowhere can also be the stance of the objectivist researcher who distances him or herself sufficiently to see all the better. Neither the insider nor outsider ”views from nowhere” adequately considers the complexity of being a participant-observer where the best viewing is done by capitalizing on the tension between being both participant and observer, both an insider and outsider with a point of view in all situations, albeit different in each. In an odd sort of way total bracketing seems to leave the researcher free not to question his or her world view just as taking an objectivist stance does in positivist oriented research. However, bracketing encourages involvement and sympathetic 69 understanding with the informant's experience whereas an objectivist/ positivist stance advocates detached objectivity. Sources of data The interviews were semi-structured and as described earlier my general orientation in this study were phenomenological. Smith (1995) notes that the difference between structured and semi-structured interviewing is that the latter is guided rather than lead by the interview protocol. Structured interviewing, he claims, usually shares much of the rationale of classical experimental research designs which puts unproductive constraints on the experimental or interview situation. Structured interviews generally use short questions, are to be read exactly as on the schedule, questions must be asked in an identical order, and ideally have precoded themes or categories (Smith, 1995). Like the move in experimental research from classical experimental studies to design experiments (Brown, 1992) or transformational experiments (Bronfennbrenner, 1979) there has been an underlying shift toward a phenomenological/ interpretive stance in the move from structured to semi-structured interviewing. Semi-structured interviews focus more on trying to develop a rapport with informants, focus less on the order of questions, and explore interesting areas or issues of concern that arise in the course of the interview. These differences are not accidental but follow from the phenomenological position adopted by most semi-structured interview projects. The interviewer has an idea of the area of interest and some questions to pursue. At the same time, there is a wish to try and enter, as far as is possible, the psychological and social world of the respondent. Therefore the respondent shares more closely in the 70 direction the interview takes and he or she can introduce an issue the investigator has not thought of. In this relationship, the respondent can be perceived as an expert on the subject and should therefore be allowed maximum opportunity to tell his or her own story. (Smith, 1995, p. 12) Three issues from this quotation are worth addressing in more detail: (1) ”an idea of an area of interest”, (2) ”at the same time there is a wish to try...”, and (3) ”the respondent can be perceived as an expert”. First, the notion of the researcher having an area of interest, or what others call a ’sensitizing concept’ differentiates semi-structured interviewing from full-scale ethnographic studies in which a researcher might generate practically all aspects of the study from the ground up including the focal question. Second, all the time while keeping the sensitizing concept in mind there ”is also wish” to enter the phenomenological world of the informant. This, I have noticed, involves a sensitivity to the language used by informants, be it in - terms of frequent or recurring phrases/ metaphors, or sensitivity to how the demand characteristics of an interview situation may encourage the informant to present a particular public persona. Having both an idea to pursue and a wish to understand the worldview of the informant presents the researcher with many dilemmas not unlike those that teachers find themselves grappling with (Lampert, 1985). Lampert describes how "the teacher as dilemma manager - a broker of contradictory interests" (p. 178) can learn to cope over time. These dilemmas do not present ready made answers save maybe poet Rainer Maria Rilke’s (1984) counsel that we ”live the questions”. It is not an either/ or situation where only attending to either the informant's world view or to my research interest alone will suffice. The challenge is to, in the words of James Joyce, have "two thinks at a time" (Kearney, 1985, p. 10) 71 Third, taking the position that the most knowledgeable people about the focal question were my informants encouraged me to take seriously the idea that they were they experts on how they were anticipating the future. I was forthright with them about my area of interest in the written information I shared with them from the beginning of the study. This method of starting semi-structured interviews in a rather loosely fashioned way and moving to more directed and structured questions has been called funneling (Smith, 1995). Thus over the course of the study as I came to know each informant better I was able tailor the interview in an improvisational manner. In summary both during each interview and over the course of the study I became somewhat more focused in my questions and more comfortable deviating from preset questions based on my developing knowledge of each Intern. W The Interns were interviewed three times (see Table 3): (i) in December around the end of the first period of lead teaching, (ii) during February toward the middle of their main period of lead teaching, and (iii) in April during the final month of the Internship program as they were gradually withdrawing from their classrooms. I chose these junctures during the Internship since, I hoped, they would give a sense of changing anticipatory reflection within context of the Intemship's changing demands. For example, the first round of interviews at the end of the first period of guided lead teaching at the end of November/ beginning of December was well timed in terms of getting a sense of the Interns' reflections on their first semester and their anticipations with regard to the Spring semester looming on the horizon. The first interview I hoped, would give a sense of the hopes, fears, and expectations the Intern teachers have for 72 themselves and their students during the just completed first semester of the Intern year. The second round of interviews provided an equally opportune moment to assess their changing reflection since the interns were deep in the throes of lead teaching, an eight week period during which they are substantially responsible for the children, the planning, teaching and learning. Thus the February/ early March interviews assessed changing anticipatory reflection during the final phase of lead teaching, which is a focal point in the Intern year program. The final interview six weeks later at the end of the Internship provided an opportunity for interns to both reflect back on their Intern year and anticipate their first year as teachers. This focus group session took place, then, during the less hurried period after lead teaching as they were gradually moving out of their placement, finishing up Internship related coursework and preparing for the job hunt. The final interview thus gave a sense of how anticipatory reflection develops under less pressure and busyness than during lead teaching. Each of these stages during the Internship provided a different blend of demands on the interns, in terms of time spent in their placement classroom, on planning, on Internship related coursework, preparing for the demands of entering the world after college and overall time commitment and expectations of the Internship program. In many ways each of these demands was present at every point of the Internship year, however, they shared the limelight in what might best be characterized as a figure-ground relationship. Warsaw In this section I will address in detail (1) a three phase framework for in-depth phenomenological interviewing, (2) the shared and non-shared aspects of all three interviews phases, (3) a rationale for adopting hopes, fears, and 73 expectations as a tracer or proxy for anticipatory reflection, and the thematic focus and format of each one-to-one and focus group interview phase in greater detail. won-.1 u- ou-u 0:4 . '1 - ' : ,8 1.” . . - 101‘. I adopted a three interview or three phase model of in-depth phenomenological interviewing. Seidman (1991) outlines this three phase method as follows: the first interview focuses on life-history, the second interview on specifics of the focal theme, and the third interview on the informant’s meaning attributions with regard to the focal theme. I chose this format as a heuristic device for a number of reasons. First, the process of in- depth interviewing matched my general plan for the interview process of starting with the Interns' past and present teaching experiences early in the study and from this moving toward the focal theme. Second, the process as outlined by Seidman, while semi-structured, did not seem constrictive and I used the three phase approach as good advice rather than as a dictate to be slavishly followed. For example, I supplemented the focus on life-history in the first interview with questions that addressed my focal theme. Third, Seidman (1991) offered advice for phenomenologically oriented interviewers under the title ’technique is not everything but it makes a difference’: listen more talk less, explore rather than probe, listen rather than think of the next question, attend to different channels of communication rather than the verbal only, follow up on what the interviewee says, ask open ended questions, follow up but don't interrupt, ask participants to tell a story, and ask for concrete details. I endeavored to keep these rules of thumb in mind as I was working with the interns over the course of the study. These strategies complemented general guidelines I have been using in my counseling / 74 mediation work over the last few years. Thus at various points during the interviews I was conscious of how good interviewing practice could assist my work with interns. For example, in the case of explore rather than probe I was reminded of the three step counseling model of exploration, understanding and action. Exploration here reminded me of being attentive to the directions interns were taking the interview and the crucial importance of roaming around the known from the perspective of the Interns' anticipations of the future. The first interview focused on life-history and the focus of this study anticipatory reflection. Thus the first interview addressed biographical / personal history of each intern in terms of it's influence on their decision to become a teacher. The second interview in February focused on the Interns’ specific meanings and experiences related to the focal theme of this study: anticipatory reflection. The categories or themes I choose for the second interview were derived from themes that emerged when I analyzed the first set of interviews. These themes are summarized in Table 4. The second interview clarified, when necessary, biographical issues arising in the first interview and then focused more specifically on role models, critical incidents, hopes, fears and expectations the interns are experiencing as they teach. The third interview focused on both the Interns' and my understandings of the changes in their anticipatory reflection over the five months of the study. Shareiaspectaefjnmgintmziems. The three interviews were similar to one another in structure. All three interviews started with an open ended invitation to recount their current experiences in their placement classroom. I decided that starting with their immediate experience during 75 each interview would be comfortable for them since they were immersed in the setting and, as such, were the experts on their classroom setting and experience. In addition I hoped that by starting with their reflections on current experiences this would surface the key issues or critical incidents on their horizon during that time period. All three interviews used Interns' hopes, fears and expectations as a way of addressing anticipatory reflection. In addition, the second and third interviews involved explicit attention to themes brought up in the previous interviews. During all three interviews I was alert for the role of critical incidents in the Interns' recollections and anticipations. Critical incidents - the term to describe "significant events in teachers' lives and careers;...incidents or milestones, beacons, turning points, decision points, times and places in one's life that introduce significant changes in one's thinking and practice" (Knowles, Cole, 8: Presswood, 1994, p.82) - have been highlighted as important in student teachers learning to teach (Knowles, Cole, 8: Presswood, 1994). The inclusion of critical incidents and role model questions in my interview protocols is based on the assumption that significant prior experiences are parts of memory and remembering that influence anticipatory reflection. All the interviews were audiotaped and I asked Interns about their hopes, fears and expectations as a proxy for the anticipatory reflection they engaged in. During all three interviews I asked about Interns' hopes, fears and expectations since I expected these themes to provide insight and generative discussion around the Interns experience of: (1) anticipatory socialization, (2) transition experiences, (3) avoidance and approach, and (4) the contrasting affective aspects of being a novice teacher. 76 A 'al nd ara rxfraniiat fl 1. Anticipatory socialization: Possible selves have been identified by Cross and Markus (1990) as indicators of anticipatory socialization to describe how hopes and fears may foreshadow development in the domain of self and identity. Cross and Markus describe how across the life-span from late adolescence to the late sixties there is a distinctly different set of possible ' selves identified by men and women. As people age Cross and Markus noted _ that there was a tendency for progressively more focused configuration of possible selves and an increased density or elaboration within specific life domains. In summary there was an overall decrease in range of possible selves but increase in focus of possible selves identified by people as they age and they craft their identities accordingly. The configuration of possible selves, to use the language of narrative psychology, reflected the participant’s individual history and imagined futures within or constrained by encompassing cultural expectations and practices. In summary hopes and fears foreshadow the possible. It was primarily this hunch that possible selves might be a useful concept around which I could engage in reflection and conversation with the Interns and colleagues interested in this inquiry that I choose to adopt possible selves as an opening gambit in the interviews. 2. Sensitive to the dynamics of transition experiences: The second reason for adopting hopes, fears and expectations as a proxy is related to the first, as its' focus is on the notion of change being particularly salient during the year-long internship. I hoped that the focus on possible selves would tap into the transitional dynamics of the Internship. From my experience as a University-School Liaison during the two years prior to this study I noticed how personally challenging the Internship turned out to be for many. Interns found themselves, often to their own surprise and irritation changing or 77 trying to change well-learned habits of mind and action in their personal and professional lives. For example, I noticed how some referred to their sense of the shift from being college students to being in the world of work during the Intem year. Possible selves also have the potential to be useful in tracing changes in identity during a transition period in which hopes and fears become more salient. 3. Indicators of approach and avoidance: Possible selves consist of hopes, fears and expectations. Hopes, on the one hand, are an indicator of what people want to move toward, what they aspire to become, and attain. In contrast, fears, suggest what people are trying to avoid, to move away from and find particularly undesirable. Furthermore, hope and fear can be two sides of the same coin: what is strongly aspired to may generate an equally strong fear of not being attained. However, hope and fear attend to related but different realms of human experience. Granted one may, as a novice teacher, hope to have ’good discipline’ and at the very same time fear not having this very same phenomenon. In this regard Wagner's work on 'knots' in teachers' thinking is a helpful construct. Over a fifteen year period Wagner (1984; 1987; 1993) and her colleagues have repeatedly found that the thinking processes of teachers and students sometimes become rather confused, going around in circles without finding an "exit"....we called these internal conflicts "knots"....these "knots" appeared to have significant impact on thinking and emotions as well as actual classroom behavior. (Wagner, 1993, p. 1) Wagner's, theory of subjective imperative is useful in understanding the relationship between why hope and fear may be two sides of the same coin. 'Hope is in a sense similar to what 'must be' an imperative however as Wagner claims we do not imperate when what we claim ought to be might not be: "one does not imperate oneself something unless it is possible that it 78 may not happen what one feels 'ought to' or 'must' happen...so "knots" are conflicts in consciousness arising from the perceived or anticipated violation of subjective imperatives" (1993, p. 5). Therefore the subtext of many strongly felt hopes mey la the underlying fear that the very opposite to the hoped for outcome may ensue. Thus, where hope and fear are conjoined around a particular theme may be indicative of knots. Most important is Wagner's categorization of three basic types of imperative violation conflicts of which all may refer to anticipated conflicts in the future: reality, conflicts of possibility and conflicts of impossibility. . However similar the content hope and fear they are different in directionality and the affective energy infused in each experience. Hopes are sought out; fears are avoided. Hope can energize but an excess of hope or unrealistic hope can lead to disillusionment and frustration. Fear can paralyze and stultify but also provide impetus and sustain momentum in not wanting to be a certain way or be like a certain person. Hope can tap into the idealism of youth of those embarking on a new career. The Interns' idealism, however unrealistic appearing to more seasoned professionals no doubt serves a useful function in helping them stick with their career choice when fears seem overwhelming and when expectations may seem more dark than light. [1 _ . . WM- During the first interview I asked each Intern to tell me about their (i) experiences in their placement, (ii) life-history as it relates to teaching, and their hopes and fears for life, and (iii) teaching and the program standards. The first and second parts of the interview were relatively open-ended as I sought to get a picture of the Intem’s developing sense of 79 themselves as teachers. Asking each Intern to ’paint a picture of your placement in words for a foreign visitor’ to their classroom was the focal question to guide the first part of the interview. The second part of the interview, life-history, was more structured, and asked each Intern to describe who they expect to become as a teacher. With regard to life history I asked them to describe teaching role models from their school, family, and related experiences such as coaching or previous work experience, critical incidents which might have influenced their views on teaching, and asked them to pick out the key themes or threads rurming through their life-history with regard to how it influenced their choice of teaching as a career. Experiences in childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood as well as family, school, and media influences were explored. The third, semi-structured, phase of the interview focused on the themes of fears, hopes and expectations in relation to their life in general, their teaching, the program standards, their students and placement school. In addressing their hopes, fears and expectations for their students I focused these questions on two children the Intern identified based on their contrasting concerns for these two children. W: The second interview involved three parts: (1) an open ended time at the begirming when interns talked about changes or issues they were grappling with in their placement, (2) questions related to their hopes and fears in relation to life, teaching and program standards in that order, and (3) finally their hopes and fears related to the themes in Table 4: themes which emerged from my analysis of the first set of interviews. In one or two cases I had questions unique to an intern arising from the Guided Practice seminar or an incidental conversation. For example, I went on day- long bus trip in early February with the interns in the urban setting to visit all the fourth grade classes from their school who were at a week long winter 80 camp in rural Michigan. While trudging across snow in sub-zero temperatures Thomas mentioned to the group how he was inspired and encouraged in his choice to be a teacher and make a contribution to society listening to President Clinton’s 1997 State of the Union address. I followed up on this conversation with Thomas during the second interview to find out whether and how his January inspiration was reflected in his February anticipations about his future as a teacher. WW: Overall, the focus of these final set of interviews was toward understanding the Intem’s meaning making from the viewpoint of anticipatory reflection. In doing this I tried to draw on data and interpretation from the first and second interviews so that my own and their meaning making were at the center of attention. I focused on meaning using one of two strategies. First, I asked the interns about the surprises they had experienced during the Internship. Second, I tried to address the intellectual and emotional connections between the participants’ teaching related anticipations and their anticipations beyond the domain of teaching. a ' i at Listening to the first and second set of interviews I hit on the idea of asking the Interns about what surprised them most about the experience. Surprise seemed to me a very practical and authentic way of addressing anticipation. Surprise conjures up the notion of the unexpected, the unanticipated, the issues that were neither explicitly hoped for nor specifically feared. Surprise can be pleasant or unpleasant and sometimes may be terrifying and paralyzing. One way or another it inevitably comes back to some sense or some expectation about the future jolted by some event in the 81 immediate present that provokes disequilibrium. Scheffler (1977/1991) describes surprise as a cognitive emotion: Expectations have the function of orienting us selectively toward the future, but this function does not require that they blind us to the unforeseen. Indeed, the presumption of mismatch between experience and expectation underlies another cognitive emotion: surprise. (p.11) 82 Table 3 One-to-One and Focus Group Interview Summary 1-1 Interviews Focus Group # 1 DECEMBER focus on life- history 8: hopes plus fears across various domains of teaching 8: self 'looking back to Sept. 8: ahead to what is on the horizon for the Spring' Activity: reflection sheet 8: discussion # 2 FEBRUARY questions based on SPECIFICS of themes from #1 * elaboration 'holding your breath' theme from #1 Activity: drawing 8: writing about current 8: hoped for teaching setting # 3 APRIL questions based on MEANING of themes from #1 8: #2 ’8 surprise as "unanticipated aspects across themes" Contour of the remembered past 8: anticipated future Activity: Contours of Intern Year 8: Beyond 83 Scheffler also speaks of surprise as one of the pivotal cognitive emotions and attributes considerable importance to it as a precursor to more focused inquiry. This view of surprise as a prelude to inquiry echoes Dewey’s (1933) notion of ’felt difficulty’ as a precursor to inquiry. Scheffler (1991), drawing on Dewey, cogently argues for the important function of emotion in inquiry and problem solving: The course of problem solving...is continually monitored by the theorist’s cues of feeling, his sense of excitement or anticipation, his elation or suspicion or gloom. (p. 9) Utilized as a way of understanding the unanticipated, surprise also helped me understand some of what the Interns anticipated, expected and were not surprised about during the intern year. The content of the final interview included the themes that emerged from the first round of interviews and those that I later addressed during the second round in February. Questions or themes arising from related issues aired in the Guided Practice seminar were added also as I thought of them during the interview. This final interview addressed the Interns attributions about and expectations of changes in their self- and other-related hopes, fears, and expectations over the course of the Internship. The question about what surprised them about the experience was posed at each stage of the final interview. In addressing surprise I then asked each Intern to cast this experience of surprise forward and describe how this was influencing their vision of the future. I addressed meaning by questioning them about their surprises across each theme from the first and second set of interviews. This focus on surprise brought together both anticipation and meaning making in a grounded manner. For example, at the beginning of the final interview, 84 Table 4 Interview # 1 - Coding categories: Feb. 24. 1997 0 RESOURCES: " Material resources: when interns talk about using curriculum guides, lesson plans, post-it notes, diary / planner, abundance or lack of resources or $$ or any other mention of resources from any location within or outside school setting " Human resources: when Intern talks about using, relying on, imagining, interacting with teaching role models from the past, collaborating teacher, other teachers in school, university faculty or others. 0 TIME: when Intern talks about temporal dimensions of learning to teach such as anticipating: needing to fill up time, having too little time, organizing time, segmenting time in different ways, strategies for dealing with reconfiguring time during the Internship vis-a-vis teaching and personal life 0 IMPACT [EFFICACY when Intern talks about making a difference in the immediate and distant future, having an impact to compensate for past ills in education and/ or their own experience 0 LEGTTIMACYtINTIMIDATION) when Interns talk about their anticipations with regard to their standing with their collaborating teacher, other teachers / administrators in their school, students, and parents. 0 HOLDING THEIR BREATH FOR THE SAKE OF CONSISTENCY when Interns talk about maintaining a certain equilibrium or balance as a means of working with their CT rather than being the very teacher they anticipate being in the future 0 IMAGINING POSSIBLE SELVESIPOSSIBLE PEDAGOGICAL WORLDS when Interns talk about alternative ways of acting as teachers or different / new visions of schools in society 0 POWER when Interns talk about issues of control, authority, and power they experience during the Internship vis-a-vis their relationship with students and/ or teachers, administrators, university personnel, and parents 0 ENGAGEMENT WITH STUDENTS 8: EXTENDING ON ESELF when Interns talk about either extending themselves or being drawn in to relationships and involved in the lives of their students 0 BEING KNOWLEDGEABLE AND FLUID BOTH ABOUT AND IN REPRESENTATION 0F SUBJECT MATTER when Interns talk about being comfortable and expert with subject matter, curriculum and representation of knowledge 85 when it was very open ended, I phrased the question about how they were thinking about the future given the overall surprises of the Internship very broadly. ”Given what you have just described/ reconstructed in this and the earlier interviews where do you see yourself going in the future?” The format of the final one and half to two hour interview was, as in the earlier interviews, (1) initially focused on the Intern’s immediate or present experience, (2) addressed to their hopes and fears in relation to life, teaching and the program standards, and (3) addressed the surprises of the internship across the themes identified in the first and second interviews, and how these surprises were influencing their anticipations. As with the other two I started the interview very open ended in the hope that by being attentive to the Intern’s initial comments and anecdotes I could get a sense of the tenor and pivotal events since we last talked. The second part of the interview, like the previous two, addressed hopes and fears in relation to life, the program standards, and teaching. Finally, the third part of the interview addressed themes from interviews one and two. Each theme was addressed in terms of surprises and expectations. For each theme I then asked about their stance toward the future, given the surprises they had just mentioned, by asking the following for each theme. "Given what you have just described surprised you with regard to where do you see your self going in the future?" [e.g. time ] In summary, the third interview addressed the Interns' perceptions of changes in their anticipatory reflection as teachers. This was addressed at first by open ended questions and then by presenting the Intern with comments they made earlier in the year and asking them to reflect on differences they 86 see now in their hopes, fears, and expectations. In tailoring interviews for individual interns I reread each transcript earlier during the day or on the night prior to both the second and third interviews. CoMeuLandJcnnaLothefemsgreups The Guided Practice seminar is meant to be a forum for guided reflection on the problems of practice the Interns encounter in their classrooms and therefore is a logical site to study Intern reflection. The Table 5 Main Participants and Secondary Participants URBAN SUBURBAN 1-1 INTERVIEW 0 2 females (1 European 0 3 females (2 European- (only) American. 8: 1 African- American. 8: 1 African- Ameriean.) American) 0 1 male (European- American) FOCUS GROUP as above plue 2 males as above me 1 (1 European-American 8: 1 African American) European American female seminars, at the two schools operated as focus groups for the purposes of following up on and extending issues raised during the individual interviews. According to Frey and Fontana's (1993) typology of 'Group Interviews and Dimensions', focus groups usually have a formal preset venue (the school practicum site), relatively directive interviewer/ moderator, and a structured or semi-structured question format (reflective surveys and drawing activities in this study). 87 My role in the focus group interviews was facilitator, having discussed the activities prior to each Guided Practice seminar meeting with both liaisons during which some changes were made to my original plans. In preparation for both the first (December) and second (February) Focus Group meetings I met both University-School Liaisons to discuss my plan for the Guided Practice seminar. I gave each Liaison a memo outlining my tentative plans for each seminar. For example, the memo to both liaisons in December consisted of the original text from the proposal which I had shared at an . earlier meeting with each liaison as well as recent amendments. This original text was elaborated on in more detail based on my ideas and further developed in response to Liaison suggestions. Both Liaisons, while making suggestions, were eager that I have a chance to explore and bring forth the Interns’ anticipatory reflection. Their suggestions mainly focused on how my plans might be best framed to fit with the on-going activities in their school / Guided Practice seminar setting. Some of the suggestions they made were incorporated into the way each activity was framed. For example, during the December meeting the Liaison in the suburban school mentioned that the reflections I was asking the Interns to engage in might draw on an autobiography paper they were doing for their coursework. The liaisons in both schools were present and participated in each focus group often making comments and co-facilitating or assisting. The liaison in the suburban school was unable to attend the February meeting thus I led this myself. Due to time pressures the plans for the final Focus Group meeting in April were discussed over the phone. W. The activities in the first focus group meetings in both schools lasted about an hour and were divided into two 88 half-hour sessions. Both half-hours sessions involved Interns in written reflections in response to questions I gave them followed by group discussion of their responses. In the first half-hour Interns were asked to remember their hopes and fears from the previous September as they contemplated the Internship year. During the second part of this session they were asked to reflect on their hopes and fears for the coming Spring semester. My purpose here was that the Interns would first individually and later collectively identify and reflect on both the hopes and fears they had at the beginning of the Internship year in September and those they currently had as they anticipated the Spring semester. Both questions were about anticipation -- the September anticipatory reflection being a reconstruction in December of how they felt at the beginning of the semester. The Interns responded to the following questions while reflecting on their state of anticipation at the beginning of the year: What I hoped most in learning to teach at the beginning of the Internship was.... How did this hope play out in your teaching? What did you do to attain it or seek it out? What I feared most in learning to teach at the beginning of the Internship was... How did this fear play out in your teaching? What did you do to cope with it? During the second part of this focus group they again reflected based on questions I posed: What I hope most in learning to teach during the second half of the Internship is... What I fear most in learning to teach during the second half of the Internship is.... As a whole group they then discussed (i) how the Guided Practice seminar and other support we offer each other as Interns can be educative as we 89 anticipate hopes and fears in the Spring; (ii) How can we as interns get help or elicit support from our CT or Liaison as we anticipate various Internship experiences? Wm. My original plan for the second Focus Group meeting was that they would engage in a 'Draw-A-Teacher activity' -- including both a feared and hoped for image with a narrative commentary as the basis for a discussion (Weber 8: Mitchell, 1994). However, based on my analysis of the first set of interviews I noticed a theme, related to the Interns’ anticipations, which I thought important and could be explored in more detail in the focus group. This theme is best expressed as ’holding your breath’ since many Interns expressed a felt need not to become inconsistent or out of step with their CT while at the same time waiting to get into their own classroom: holding their pedagogical breath. A typical expression of this viewpoint is the following comment by Olga in December: 0. I hope that all the questions I have now are answered. And they're not questions but just fears and I just want to feel independent and you know, like I don't need another teacher around to help me. Not that I don't want help but I mean, I can just have my own classroom and feel comfortable running my own classroom. And later in the same interview she commented: Q You know, then I feel kinda awkward in that position. Whereas if I have my own classroom, if it doesn't work, it didn't work and you know, I'm not being judged or anything like that. So I think that's kinda hard sometimes. Other Interns were more specific in describing how being an Intern constrained their teaching and how they were looking forward to the day they would be more free to choose what they would teach and how long they 90 would spend on various topics. April spoke of feeling hemmed in by the time constraints in working with her CT. Again my point here in presenting these comments by Interns is to draw attention to how thinking ahead to the day they would have their own classroom was a means of coping with the here and now constraints of their internship experience. G: But it's really hard to get everything you want them to know into just a half an hour. So that's still a problem and there's really, there's really no way of getting around it except for you're just going to have to cut it short all the time, you know. That's why I'm looking forward to my own classroom. Speaking in February Olga, again, returned to the ’in my own classroom / holding my breath’ theme and commented on how being in her own classroom would reduce the time pressures she experienced working with another teacher. 0 Painting, science, because I team teach with the other first grade teacher, so I teach her classroom for a half hour and my classroom for a half hour but for science experiments, a half hour is never long enough. So I mean, I'm rushing through and it's like can I beat the clock. And then the kids get wild because they're being rushed so it's, I kind of dread science. Whereas if it was just me teaching science in MY OWN ROOM for an hour, I wouldn't be... you know, I'm dealing with another teacher so I really have to be on a time schedule. [0 #2, 45] Based on these comments it occurred to me that while the Interns were striving for consistency with their CT in the immediate present they were telling themselves a common and recurring story about their future: ”when I II have my own classroom I will.... . Thus, to explore both the Interns’ stories of the immediate-present and future-in-the-present I designed an activity in which they were asked to draw and annotate their experience of (1) 91 themselves in their teaching placement, and (2) their anticipated sense of themselves in a hoped for or ideal teaching position. This pair of drawings and annotations I hoped would allow a more in-depth exploration of what seemed to be a significant experiential theme for many Interns. I expected this theme to be more salient and accentuated given the pressures of lead teaching during which the second focus group meeting took place. This hunch was borne out in the focus group discussions. In addition to exploring the ’holding your breath’ theme I wanted to use graphic images as a way of evoking the Interns’ thinking since I was conscious of how to date my work with the Interns had relied exclusively on verbal data. Thus I wanted to draw on the Interns analogical, intuitive thinking to complement the more analytic verbal data teacher thinking research (Wubbels, 1992). Verbal-analytic activities are also most typical of the various reflective methods used in the teacher education program in which the Interns were learning to teach. Perhaps we could learn something interesting and novel from a more graphic, analogical intuitive approach to representing Interns’ anticipations. The materials used were colored crayons, white 11” by 18” chart paper, with an accompanying reflection sheet with the following questions for both the ’Now’ and ’Future’ activities respectively (see Appendix D). Instructions for the ’Now’ classroom drawing were: Please draw a picture: of the classroom setting you are in and the image you have of your self in this setting. Please write a paragraph explaining how you think about your drawing on the space provided on the back of the page (Instructions for commentary) Please describe your setting. Use words or phrase that capture the atmosphere of your placement for you. Please describe your image of your self in this setting. Use words or phrase that capture the main idea / atmosphere/ image you have of your self teaching in this setting. 92 And for the Ideal or Hoped for classroom: Please draw a picture: of the classroom setting you imagine or hope to be in and the image you have of your self in this setting. Please write a paragraph explaining how you think about your drawing on the space provided on the back of the page (Instructions for commentary) Please describe your setting. Use words or phrase that capture the atmosphere of your placement for hoped for teaching setting'. Please describe your image of your self in this hoped for setting 8: teacher'. Use words or phrase that capture the main idea/ atmosphere / image you have of your self teaching in this setting. Drawings have been used to understand many facets of human development. For example, children’s conceptions of the political (Cairns, 1996; Coles, 1986a) and moral world (Coles, 1986b), and group values (Dennis, 1966), have been studied through their drawings. In the realm of educational research students’ drawings have been used to evoke teacher reflection (Weber 8: Mitchell, 1993; Tovey, 1996), and teachers’ drawings have been used to understand pre- and in-service teachers’ thinking about students, classrooms, and life as a teacher (Weber 8: Mitchell, 1995). Haney (1996), commenting on the use of drawings in Co-NECT, a large scale professional development initiative, noted how students’ drawings helped teachers reflect on their teaching such a way that ”discussion turned to teachers themselves -- not just what was being taught but how” and that drawings, particularly those done by kids, are generative in ”engaging teachers and evoking reflection”. Likewise, my use of the Interns’ drawings was intended to evoke reflection and was specifically designed to elicit the prospective dimensions of reflection. W. The themes of the final focus group meetings in both schools were: (1) reflecting on the ACTUAL EXPERIENCE of the Intern year, (2) then ANTICIPATING or looking to the next year of teaching 93 when each Intern. might have their ”own classroom”, and (3) thinking back to how they HAD BEEN ANTICIPATING the Internship at the beginning of the Intern year in late August/ early September. In addressing these three issues 1 adapted the life-line or story-line method. I used the story-line method a few years ago while teaching developmental psychology (Sugarman, 1986) in adult education classes. The story-line method has been used in research recently to research experienced teacher’s remembered teaching experiences and perceptions of professional identity (Beijard, 1995). Usually the story- line/life—line method is used to address people’s retrospective reflection, as is the case of it’s use in life-span developmental psychology or Beijaard’s study of experienced teachers’ professional identity. However, I used it to encourage reflection that was both retrospective and prospective. Among the advantages of the story-line method according to Gergen (1988) are: (1) informants graphically represent their experiences, (2) story-lines are relatively easy and quick to construct and ”may be perceived by the respondent as an interesting and creative mode of self-expression” (Beijaard, 1995, p.286), (3) the graphical depictions of informants’ experiences may vividly represent what otherwise might be very difficult to convey, and (4) the use of the story-line helps the researcher understand experiences in a manner difficult accomplish via other means. The main disadvantage is that the story-line method might gloss over important details especially when used to reflect over extended periods of time. I asked the Interns (see Appendix F) to draw two lines: 0 to represent their actual experienced comfort level over the Intern year and to project this forward to their first year teaching after the Internship. Thus this line was both retrospective and prospective, 94 0 to reconstruct their anticipations of the Internship from the point of view of the previous September when they were commencing the Intern year. Initially in planning the activity I defined comfort, much like ’flow’, as a balance between challenge and boredom. However, this seemed problematic as I thought about the process of assessing the lines. Thus, in the focus group I actually defined the ’Y’ axis as comfort. Each Intern was asked to annotate this in the following manner. Draw a line to describe the Internship experience from the point of view of challenge and support (or overall comfort) and then project this line onward to your next teaching experience/ first teaching job (if applicable) Mark one or more high points, low points and turning points clearly with a star. Then in one or two sentences (on this sheet) describe and explain the reasons for one high point, low point and turning point over the course of last two semesters. HIGH POM LOW POINT TURNING POINT Pick one point you anticipate in the future and describe what would make this a high low or turning point for you. Write a few lines below to describe how your reasoning about this anticipated point in the future relates to some past experience you have had learning to teach. My intention in choosing comfort for the ’Y’ axis was to get a holistic rating of the Intern year. Of course critics might assert that it is in only times of cognitive dissonance and conflict (Festinger, 1957) that cognitive change occurs thus comfort does little to illuminate learning during the Intern year. However, comfort need not necessarily be inimical to learning, indeed conflict as a precondition for learning is but one perspective. A Vygotskian perspective offers an alternative view claiming that learning can also occur when we get support or assistance, not unrelated to comfort, that we are apprenticed into a community (Tharp 8: Gallimore, 1988). 95 This form of annotation led to the identification of critical incidents or watershed moments during the Internship. The main purpose of these discussions was to raise the Interns' consciousness about their own anticipatory reflection and also about that of their peers as they reflected back on the Intern year as well as looked forward to their first teaching position. In summary, the interviews incorporated discussions and questions about the Interns’ personal histories related to anticipatory reflection, hopes and fears for themselves in relation to life, teaching, and program standards, hopes and fears in relation to their students, strategies Interns used for realizing hopes and avoiding or coping with fears in teaching, teaching role models, and critical incidents. Two drawing activities I used in the second and third focus group interviews addressed anticipation using primarily a non-verbal mode of data co-authoring. 1] Ba . . Six Interns took part in both the three one-tOoone and focus group interviews. A seventh intern who taught in the suburban setting dropped out of the Internship program in the early part of the Spring semester. She did not contact me directly and expressed through her Liaison that she did not want to participate in the study any longer. I did not use the data collected from my interview with her as part of the study documented here. I will describe each Intern who participated drawing on the first interview which focused on the teaching-related autobiographical aspects of each Intem’s prior knowledge and experience. In the following paragraphs I describe the three suburban based Interns and then the urban based Interns. In recounting each Interns background I rely on their own words. 96 The participants in this study had much in common. All were in their early twenties, twenty-two to twenty-four years of age, and single. All were from Michigan and had grown up there. Rachel, Kelly, and Gina interned in the suburban school and Thomas, Olga, and Michelle were based in the urban school. Table 6 Intern Information Intern Practicum Gender Race- Grade level Class School Ethnicity Teacher Thomas CitAy Male Caucasian 3rd. Tricia Olga City Female Caucasian lst Olive Michelle City Female Af.-Amer. lst Maria Kelly Suburb Female Caucasian K Jo Gina Suburb Female Af.-Amer. K Gail Rachel Suburb Female Caucasian 1 Rita Rachel. Rachel’s placement was in a lst grade classroom. Despite being in a year long Internship during her fifth year in college she did not always want to be a teacher. In fact she detested the cute image of the teacher and the apple. She was a psychology and child development major before entering the teacher education program. Growing up in a poor one parent family for her first decade she was attracted to teaching in the hope of being a nurturant figure for tomorrow’s adults. She was propelled into teaching, in part, by realizing how she did not want to have to work in a factory like her single 97 mother had to when she was growing up. Rachel might be best described as having a 'lifeguard' metaphor of teaching. Despite poverty and no long term marriage in her extended family to serve as a role model, Rachel has 'overcome the odds', to use Werner and Smith's (1992) phrase to characterize the lives of high risk children who survive and lead productive lives. Like many of the high risk children who became successful adults in Werner and Smith’s Kauai study, Rachel was a strong advocate on her own behalf. For example, Rachel mentioned how she had sought out resources throughout the teacher education program in general as well as having actively pursued her particular Internship site since she anticipated feeling challenged and comfortable there. Rachel, speaking in December during the first interview, was happy in her classroom placement and saw the school faculty as having "wonderful" relations. The classroom and school came to her notice a few years ago and she sought it out since it was consistent with her philosophy of teaching despite the fact that she would be "coming out into suburbia teaching all white kids...there is nothing wrong with being comfortable during your Internship year". Like the other Interns in this building she felt the placement of each Intem’s nameplate alongside that of the class teacher outside the class door had helped establish her as a bona fide teacher. Looking to the pedagogical horizon Rachel is hopeful for a job, happiness in her work, and a job in a setting that matches her philosophy of teaching. She views herself as a person willing to change. However she noted that reform and innovation in education "is all cyclical". In talking about her teaching-related fears Rachel was most concerned about being happy herself and not making kids feel they owe her anything. 98 In summary, Rachel sees care in the emotional sense as central to her work as a teacher. An advocate on her own behalf she has managed to negotiate some difficult periods in her life to the extent that she is sure that many of her teachers would be surprised as she herself is in her becoming a teacher. In midst of uncertainty in many domains Rachel, among all the Interns in this study, seemed to have the most concerns about her future. Kelly. Kelly’s placement was in a Kindergarten classroom that she described as a ”happy place” overall. The school operated a split day Kindergarten with an a.m. and p.m. group of children, providing her with two classes of children to work with. Kelly says that she "had always wanted to be a teacher" but drifted away from it and only returned to what had been her career dream in high school when her best friend reminded her of their Sunday school work with kids and how good Kelly was with kids "My friend made me think how I used to think". In the midst of the Internship Kelly is comfortable, self-aware, and less put out, according to her, by classroom vagaries than some of her peers who are in turmoil. Sometimes she has fears which are real yet when she thinks about them, they are unfounded. She finds herself moving into unknown territory during the Internship where the scripted interactions she learned as a Child Development major do not apply. With lead teaching beckoning she sees some lifestyle changes as she lives through the Internship year and keeps an eye on the pedagogical horizon. "Surprised" she says "by some of the things coming out of my mouth" she keeps herself in check as she learns to teach fearing she will become like her dismissive and authoritarian 4th grade teacher. This dismissive voice coming out of her own mouth sometimes worries her. Keeping up with the daily minutiae of teaching she is 99 "becoming a sticky person" and is building piles of materials in her room whereas previously she had never tried to save things. Like a number of other Interns Kelly brings her Child Development methods and Lab school experiences to her teaching Internship. Struggling to be more spontaneous in her interactions with her students she is moving away from a-well learned script from her child development classes. This move into unknown real life conversational situations evokes an internal dialogue about who she wants to be as a teacher. I have had so many kinds of models... it is really hard... from my child development background there was a right and wrong way to respond to a situation and now I AM FEELING THAT IS NOT THE WAY. You cannot go to a textbook to respond to every situation....now that I’m not in that environment I do not have to say, A, B, then C. I sometimes now say ”I can’t talk to you right now”...but I am struggling with interacting with kids in a way that is positive all the time....raising their hand and they are talking about...”my grandma came to visit”...they have a way of bringing up irrelevant information...l say ”Hands down!” but I do not want to be like that....I might miss something I wanted to know. Becoming a stuff person to stay ahead? Becoming a ”stuff person” and not just thinking but providing for the future by saving resources is theme expressed by other Interns. Prompted by the vast expanse of time stretching out ahead of her Kelly goes on to describe how she is beginning to gather resources and becoming a ”stuff person”. This mediation of the future by various artifacts (stuff) that she is collecting may seem ordinary. Yet from the viewpoint of sociocultural theory it is a clear example of tools being used to mediate the future. The role of internal speech as a mediational device is illustrated by Kelly’s comments ”I say ”Hands down!” but I do not want to be like that....I might miss something I wanted to know.” Here the anticipation that student interactions may provide useful 100 insights ("something I wanted to know") is the source of an inner dialogue about the appropriateness of her asking the child to put his hand down. Furthermore, her comment ("I do not want to be like that") is about identity: who she wants to become as a teacher. In addition the following quotation illustrates how, at the instigation of Kelly’s CT, she is now making lists and becoming a collector of teaching resources. Other Interns have commented how going shopping at the Mall has become a resource gathering endeavor since the Internship started in September. , K Next few weeks down time....done with teaching responsibilities....we are just doing lot of holiday things ...when we come back I am getting ready for lead teaching...I am looking forward to it but I am nervous...I make it a habit not to worry about those things...just what am I going to do with all that time? P On a daily basis how do you keep a step ahead of your self? K I feel like I have been doing really well keeping on top of things. my CT is queen of organization....everytime she says make a list...I was not a stuff person before I never saved things...I threw stuff from classes out...now I have to save things and collect it's lifestyle change but I am getting used to it. The material used here illustrates both mediation of the future via tools/ materials and inner dialogue or talk. Gina. Gina’s upbringing and her suburban internship placement were strikingly similar in many ways: in both she was one of only a few "blacks", her term rather than African-American, in an affluent white suburban setting. She grew up in a predominantly white community located in a small affluent mid-western city and her practicum classroom was also in a white, 101 affluent mainly middle class, suburban setting. She identified herself as middle class black but was adamant that, like her high school friends, her college friends were predominantly white and that the music her African- American peers listened to was somewhat alien to her. Within her extended family she was able to see the problems of gangs, drugs, and violence that her working class African-American cousins experienced in a nearby large metropolitan area. To be a child growing up in the nineties, Gina said, was particularly difficult since she viewed today’s children having to deal with gangs, drugs and child snatchers. Gina began the year with a good collegial relationship with her CT but a number of "issues", Gina's code word for racial problems, that caused constant tension during the Spring semester. Of all the Interns Gina's relationship with her CT appeared most problematic. Despite support from university personnel it ”was an on-going source of stress for Gina from early Spring to the end of the Internship. Gina's description of her CT '8 manner of treating her was as a "slavechild" [FG # 3, field notes]. The tension between them was not resolved as Gina preferred not to ruffle the waters in her placement setting. Thom Thomas’s placement was in a third grade urban setting. Coming from a relatively affluent suburb in a large Midwestern city the placement’s working class community was a ”a new experience for me.” He viewed his interest in developing his coaching skills and experience as a coach as having inspired his teaching career choice. Teaching and coaching, he said, ”positively reinforce” each other. Having many international student friends and his working in a very diversity conscious residence life department as a 102 resident assistant (RA) were identified as turning points in how he anticipated his life plan. Before his exposure to many different cultures through work, friends, and a trip to South America Thomas anticipated spending all his time teaching in Michigan. Now he hoped to teach abroad like one of his friends. Despite the unwelcome teasing by some of his peers that males going into elementary teaching were immature, gay and escapist, Thomas was happy with his career choice. While his parents suggested other career options, (engineering by his father and brother and law by his mother), they nevertheless supported his eventual choice. While he enjoyed the freedom his CT gave him over the course of the Internship he, at times, wished she was more ready to give him feedback on his teaching. Overall, he was happy with his placement and felt very at home being part of planning the third grade week long camp to an outdoor adventure center continuing a twenty year tradition among third graders in this city school. nga. Olga's placement was in a first grade urban setting. This was her second attempt at the Internship year so it was a high stakes undertaking with her family hoping to see her make it second time around. In W Boundary, a celebrated text on the challenges of educational and cultural transitions, (1991) Mike Rose describes how he noticed and navigated different social and educational worlds as he moved from a predominantly working class Los Angeles immigrant Hispanic community to middle class America. Olga too noticed distinct differences as she moved regularly after her parents' divorce back and forth between a predominantly middle class affluent university town and a working class inner-city neighborhood. As 103 she saw a different futures unfold before her in the back and forth between the two sets of culturally-shaped expectations she worried about how students in her practicum placement classroom would fare given that they were in an inner-city community similar to the one that drew her out of a college bound life. Olga remarked that her boyfriend who grew up in the urban community of her practicum site never aspired to a college education and now at twenty- six was hoping to go to college 0 The community? I think is like the typical Cityville. I mean, my ‘ boyfriend grew up just down the street. He went to CitySchool. And he's just, you know, he went to Brighton and all this, you know, the Cityville schools and his whole, no one in his family went to college. You know, now his brother who is 30 just is going to Salem as a freshman and he says it's so hard but he's going full time just this year. And my boyfriend, now, he's going to be 26 and he just took his first class. So they're starting to like get involved but you know, my boyfriend was like, I was never encouraged to go to school. I think that's a very typical feeling. Like all his friends who grew up in this neighborhood did not go to college. None of them. You know, so it's like they're, they like went to work at like GM maybe or whatever they're doing. [0 #1, 1954] Olga enjoyed working with her CT but envied the closer relationship she saw between other Interns and their CT's. She felt her CT was more business-like than necessary at times and said she would adopt a better balance between personal and professional in relationships with Intern teachers should she ever become a CT herself. Michelle Interned in a first grade urban classroom. Michelle's decision to become an elementary teacher could be summarized by what for her are two interconnected words: faith and fate. It was ”my fate and destiny”. She 104 frequently mentioned how her Christian faith helped her through the difficult moments of the Internship. She spoke of many afternoons as a teenager helping a neighbor's child with homework as an experience that made her think of teaching as a career. Later, however, when asked what influences in the past had prompted her to enter teacher education and embark on a teaching career she said it was not the past but rather a sense of calling. She further elaborated on the sense of a call to teaching describing it as the way she could best use her life in the eyes of God. Her CT had a difficult relationship with an Intern the previous year and this was a source of anxiety to the CT in the beginning although Michelle did not know this until later in the year. "Walking in harmony" with her CT was how she characterized their relationship at one point during the year. Detainee-81's The interview data were analyzed according to inductive methodology (Erickson, 1986; Miles 8: Huberman, 1994). Thus the data were continually analyzed over the course of this study in an iterative process of data reduction, category generation and further data collection. For example, the first wave of interview data was catalogued as a precursor to more detailed inductive analysis (Miles 8: Huberman, 1994), leading to a series of hypotheses and themes / categories that helped guide the remainder of the study. The constant comparative method (Glaser, 8: Strauss, 1979; Behrens, 8: Smith, 1996) was used to ensure that the categories are reliable during data analysis. Triangulation in the analysis drew on data collected in the one-to- one interviews, focus group interviews, as artifacts from the drawing activities and in the Intern's written autobiographies. When drawing conclusions I sought out disconfirming data (Miles 8: Huberman, 1994). 105 Furthermore, opportunities to share my initial interpretations of the data with colleagues through a writers group, the Socio-cultural Research Group (SCRG) and at a conference (Conway, 1997) provided many helpful insights. Later I looked for transitions in discourse by doing more fine grained analysis of a small number of transcript segments from both the one-to-one and focus groups interviews. I relied on Erickson and Schultz's (1977, p.153- . 157) six-stage process of video tape analysis in getting started on an inductive analysis of the discourse data. Analyiime/es On a continuum from inductive to deductive studies my research falls more toward inductive but is not as highly inductive and loosely structured as a design used by researcher who takes a number of years to study an exotic culture. My data induction analysis process loosely followed a "...fairly classic set of analytic moves arranged in sequence" recommended by Miles and Huberman (1994, p. 9): 0 Affixing codes to a set of field notes drawn from observations or interviews 0 Noting reflections or other remarks in the margins. 0 Sorting and sifting through these materials to identify similar phrases, relationships between variables, patterns, themes, distinct differences between subgroups, and common sequences. 106 0 Isolating these patterns and processes, commonalties and differences, and taking them out to the field in the next wave of data collection. 0 Gradually elaborating a small set of generalizations that cover the consistencies discerned in the database. 0 Confronting those generalizations of knowledge in the form of constructs or theories. I have come increasingly to view data collection, or data co-authoring (Kvale, 1988), and analysis as an iterative process. The steps / guidelines outlined above helped me in this iterative process. Viewing data analysis as a three phase iterative process of data reduction or condensation, data display and conclusion drawing/ verification (Miles 8: Huberman, 1994) provided me with both a useful heuristic and some practical tools for proceeding. I am thinking in particular about Miles and Huberman's advocacy of the methodical use of data display as "an organized, compressed, assembly of information that permits conclusion drawing and action" (p. 11). They advocate data display noting that there are weaknesses in the overuse of extended text, the most common representational format for qualitative data, since the latter is cumbersome and sometimes promotes hasty and unjustified conclusions. With regard to the type of data being collected in my study I see the following within case and cross case data displays being most useful in addition to extended text. (i) cross-case matrix by theme for each phase of the study 107 (ii) time ordered within-case matrix spanning the three phases of the study (including phase 1 8: 2 matrix to aid in directing the third interview protocol development) (iii) time-ordered cross-case spanning three phases of study Eacdbackfitmendatarollectionandanalysia After completing a number of one-to-one interviews I outlined what I had been doing in initial data analysis. During each interview I made quick notes in the margin of the interview protocol but did less of this in later interviews as I tried to concentrate more on what was being said. After each interview I immediately made notes about my initial impression of the themes and issues that arose during the interview. Later that day or the following day I started a computer file (within-case) on each Intern, copying my initial post- interview reflections and adding other reflections. I occasionally noted cross- case issues under the category of 'General' that arose or occurred to me in the context of the particular interview. Narratixepsrcholmandnarrathteanalxsia Many advocate narrative as a method in research, however, I adopt the position that narrative is best viewed as a mode of analysis rather than a method per se. Sarbin (1986) claims that there has been a ”systematic suppression” of narrative in interview research where interviewers focus solely on categories be they a priori or generated via grounded theory or other inductive methods. Narrative theory alerts researchers to how humans use story to make sense and communicate about their experiences. Bruner (1986 8: 1990), Sarbin (1986), Polkinghome (1988), and others have drawn attention to the use of narrative analysis in psychology. Bruner has been an advocate of narrative 108 ways of knowing in educational research. As I analyzed the data I was alert to vignettes or stories the interns used to convey important aspects of their experience but particularly their use of story to describe their anticipations. I marked the transcripts as I'noted the abstract and other parts of narratives. These abstracts, or story summaries, were useful and memorable in my subsequent analysis of other interviews in the study. The narrative turn is one among many of the so-called turns that have taken place in the social sciences in recent years. The post-modern turn, the rhetorical turn, the linguistic turn, the contextual turn all point to the increasing sensitivity to interpretation in educational, psychological and sociological research. Within the (@of psychology the role of narrative modes of representation has been given unprecedented attention (Bruner, 1986, 1990; Sarbin, 1986; Casey, 1995-96). The epic tale, the mere anecdote, the dainty story, the quaint yarn no longer linger on the sidelines but have taken on important roles in data collection and analysis. Tales, anecdotes, stories, and yarns are no longer to be discarded in favor of the more categorical answers or responses that turn up in interview transcripts. Rather they are being brought forth by more story friendly interview strategies and attended to more acutely in analysis and often form the center piece of research representation. Polkinghome’s distinction between first order referents as the events which make up a story (1988, p. 60) and second order referents as the plot was useful for four reasons: as a general definition of narrative, as an indicator or means of searching and seeking narrative units and recognizing narrative genres, it provided emplotrnent as an explanatory principle within a narrative analytic framework, and finally draws attention to how individuals in telling draw on their culture’s repertoire of plots or storylines. First, 109 Polkinghome’s distinction between first and second order referents illustrates the interwoven nature of narrative and temporality. This is achieved by distinction between a first order referents chronicled as a series of events and second order referents which recount events through plot not necessarily in the chronicler’s sequence rather according to sequence best suited to the plot such that ”When the same set of facts found in a chronicle list are emplotted into a narrative, the meaning produced is of a different time order (1988, p. 61). Second, his definition provided a basis upon which to analyze the data being attentive to the narrative flow. This method of segmenting the data is sensitive to how an anecdote or story can encapsulate meaning made of experience. What might have been deleted or ignored in analysis only examining categorical type interview data is elevated to a new plane within a narrative framework. Third, Polkinghome presents the act of emplotrnent as a means through which people reconstitute their narratives. Temporally embedded narratives invariably involve past and future retold in the present. Emplotrnent Polkinghome defines as not the imposition of a ready made plot structure on an independent set of events; instead it is a dialectic process that takes place between the events themselves and a theme which discloses their significance and allows them to be grasped together as parts of one story (1988, p.19-20) Unlike the logic underlying paradigmatic ways of knowing, based on ’if X then Y’ propositional logic, narrative ways of knowing uses the ”logic of plot to help events cohere into meaningful wholes” (Polkinghorne, 1988, p. 61-62). Fourth, Polkinghome highlights the inherently cultural nature of narratives since when hearing stories we often immediately recognize the story type be it romantic, epic, tragic, tragi-comedy, farce, satire, heroic. There is then a limited repertoire of story types on which any person can draw. Here 110 Polkinghome draws on Gergen’s research which claims that ”Although the object of self-narrative is the single self, it would be a mistake to view such constructions as a product or possession of single selves” (Gergen, 1991). Summary In summary, data gathering was a three phase process over a six month period involving both one-to-one interviews and focus group interviews. Semi-strucutred phenomenological interviewing was the strategy I adopted as an interviewer. Six Intern teachers participated in both the one-to-one and focus group interviews and three additional Interns participated in the focus group since they were interning at the two focal schools. Over the course of the study data analysis was a three phase process of data reduction, data analysis and conclusion drawing / verification. A variety of matrices were used to construct within-case and-cross case representations of the data. I also used a qualitative software package called NUD‘IST mainly as an organizational, storage and retrieval tool for the seven hundred pages of interview transcript. Throughout the study I read the interviews texts from a narrative perspective paying attention to how Interns launched into stories or how narrative patterns were threaded through their representations of their remembered and anticipated teaching experiences. lll CHAPTER FOUR CHANGES IN ANTICIPATORY REFLECTION: TURBULENCE, OPTIMISM, AND EVER CHANGING HOPES AND FEARS. In this chapter I draw on three main data sources: the annotated story- line drawings, the current and hoped for classroom annotated drawings, and the Interns' expressed teaching related hoped and fears. Based on this data the chapter describes the vagaries of anticipatory reflection during the Internship focusing on: the unanticipated turbulence and personal turmoil of the intern year, Interns' optimistic anticipations, the stability of life themes in contrast to the changing nature of Interns' teaching related anticipations. Prominent aspects among these teaching related anticipations were the "holding my breath until I have my own classroom" phenomenon and finally the necessary role of surprise. I chose to start with data gathered at the end of the Internship during the final Guided Practice seminar in both schools since Interns’ graphical representations of their actual experiences and their recollection of their anticipations at the beginning of the Internship formed such a striking contrast visually and were the source of insightful conversation. I claim that the verbal descriptions and graphical depictions extend beyond the immediate narratives of the Interns and are related to societal grand narratives. In addition, the graphical representation of both expectations and experiences form a panoramic backdrop against which other data can be viewed. Three broad topics of anticipation emerged from the hopes and fears content analysis: self, relationships, and institutions. These three themes comprise the framework for chapter five. Drawing on these three main data sources I address this study's two main questions in relation to anticipatory reflection: 112 (1) What are the changes in anticipatory reflection that occur over the internship? and (2) To what can these changes be attributed? In the summary of each sub-section of this chapter I consider both questions in the light of the three data sources noted above. Allow me first, however, to revisit and set the context for this study’s main questions. There is an important prior question begging attention namely, whether anticipatory reflection is a phenomenon at all during the Internship experience. Entering this study I was alerted to the anticipatory aspect of prospective teachers' cognitions by my work in teacher education and by the literature on teacher anxieties and concerns (Veenman, 1984). Second, I was alert in my data collection and analysis to how the Interns might find my interest in their future orientation at odds with their temporal orientation. My attention to the future dimension of their reflection was not misplaced and they readily spoke, often very vividly and passionately, about aspirations and anxieties they were grappling with on a day to day, week to week, and month to month basis during the Internship. H ._ . .. ». ... .. a. .9 ‘ ... ..'. .M. .. . _u. The most striking discovery of all during the course of this study was the discrepancy in levels of comfort between what the Interns expected or anticipated about the Internship year and their actual experiences. Comfort, as I defined it on their instruction sheets, involved a balance between too much challenge and too little support. My intention was to have the Interns consider the internship and draw two graphic representations, one of the profile of their anticipated comfort levels and one of their remembered actual comfort levels. Comfort alone may not ensure development but may not 113 necessarily preclude it either. The words of Russian educator Marchenko were on my mind at the time I devised the activity - to paraphrase his adage - - development occurs when there is balance between maximum challenge and maximum support. Two alternative positions have been discussed in the literature on learning and development. Some claim we only learn under stress or when we experience cognitive dissonance (Festinger, 1957). For example, Piagetian constructivists adopt the cognitive disequilibrium hypothesis. This view of learning by conflict is usually based on an assumption of the rugged individual learner facing cognitive crises alone and successfully. However, others claim we learn with assistance and support: the assisted performance hypothesis (Tharp 8: Gallimore, 1988). Socio-cultural theorists stress learning as assisted performance and are more sympathetic to the claim that some form of support is a precondition for learning. The assisted performance hypothesis underpins the MSU teacher education program. The issue here, then, is what are the preconditions for growth? My position, in terms of using comfort as the 'Y' axis in the graphic representation exercise, is that learning to teach requires both conflict and support. Whether Interns learned or not under either extreme condition, or somewhere in between, is best resolved by referring to the Interns' accounts of what contributed to their growth. Gina, for example, experienced considerable discomfort or conflict, and disengaged from working with her collaborating teacher. Consider the case of Gina when major social conflict and tension did not support growth since at a certain point for her there seemed to be a law of diminishing marginal returns in effect. On the other hand high comfort supported her learning as she describes a high point during the internship: "Author study - got into that it was a lot of fun and I learned a lot" [Focus Group (PG) #3: Story-line activity sheet]. In contrast, 114 both Thomas and Olga spoke of how too much support or not enough challenge, brought about by boring school routines, left them feeling lethargic and disengaged from learning to teach and was a source of discomfort and a time of minimal learning. WW That the Interns representations of their anticipations were linear and their experience was non-linear is one summary of the discrepancy or mismatch between their anticipated and actual experience story-lines (Figure 1). There is general anticipation of an ever more satisfying Internship experience and overall rising expectations represented by the more or less linear drawings. Drawings by Kelly, Thomas, and Hilary in particular are markedly linear with an anticipated ever rising level of expectations from September to the end of the Internship eight months later. Drawings by Gina, Rachel, and Olga also illustrate this anticipated ever rising level of expectations, however these are tempered by anticipation of a low point during lead teaching, precipitating an even higher level of comfort after overcoming this challenge. Starting low or at a medium level of comfort with a general increase of expected comfort level is common across all anticipation drawings. W Comparing the Interns’ drawings representing their actual experiences with the anticipated experience presents a number of contrasts. First, whereas the anticipation drawings start low or at a medium level of comfort the actual experience drawings start high with what could be described as a honeymoon experience. For example, one 115 COM- FORT COM- R)RT COM- K)RT COM- FORT COM- FORT COM- PORT Sept. Dec. May. Future Kelly Sept. Dec. May. Future Hilary Sept. Dec. May. Future Thomas \ Sept. Dec. May. Future Olga l i Sept. Dec. May. Future Figure 1 Interns’ Anticipated and Remembered Story Lines 116 COM- COM- FORT R)RT COM- FORT COM- COM- K)RT Gina K Sept. Dec. May. Rachel % Sept. Dec. May. Future Kell § Sept. Dec. May. Future law 8 Sept. Dec. May. Future W Sept. Dec. May. Future Olga Sept. Dec. May. Intern described her "coasting" experiences during the early phase of the Internship as follows: ...at the beginning of the year I felt like I was just kinda coasting along, you know, it was a high point. And then you know, as the pressures kinda started building of, you know, lead teaching and that was, I guess, my turning point was when I kind of felt like hmm, maybe this isn't gonna be so easy. [FG#3, S, 11] Second, the actual experience drawings are more non-linear and turbulent. Third, both the number of troughs and peaks and the depth of low points is far greater in the actual experience drawings than what was anticipated by the Interns. WW Let me extend the analysis of the drawings by examining two pairs of drawings prototypical of the two main patterns. First, consider Thomas’ drawings which suggest linear anticipations and non-linear experience, similar to those of Kelly and Hilary. Second, consider Rachel’s drawings which suggest more or less linear expectations and non-linear experience similar to those of Gina and Olga. Thomas’ anticipation of the Internship year was strikingly linear starting from a relatively low point but then an anticipated ever rising level of comfort and satisfaction in teaching. However, very quickly this ascendant trend was thwarted by experience. Thomas described the actual experience of being in the classroom during the second and third months as characterized by a sense of ”not belonging." This accounted for the first unanticipated low point. This sense of not belonging was overcome during the Guided Lead Teaching period in November when he said he ”felt like a teacher." During the Spring he experienced another low point but toward the end of lead teaching and coming out of a week long camp in February with the third 117 grade classes at an outdoor education center he said "I feel very good about teaching and learning". Looking ahead to his first year as a teacher he anticipated being able to "stand on my own...in my own classroom." I now extend this analysis of surprise by claiming that it is similar to the surprise and subsequent identity journey immigrants and international students may undergo as they are immersed in a news culture. Navigating a new culture often involves the following stages 1 0 a honeymoon period, 2 0 a realization that the vacation is over and then a struggle with life problems, and 3 0 eventually, hopeful, a more stable period. Rachel's account of her story-line which is strikingly similar to this prototypical cultural transition or identity journey. First the honeymoon in the first semester, a little slow to get going, if you look at her story-line. Rachel later talks about difficulties anticipating students' knowledge in a science unit early in the Spring and finally a more stable period later in March. R: ...when it started, it just seemed sort of like, it was just all new so it took some while to get used to it. But no, things were cool. You know, the high point was at the end of December. That would be vacation. Actually before vacation but I was feeling really comfortable in late fall. Then the struggle... R: Things were, you know, I felt comfortable. I knew what my responsibilities were. I knew the kids. It just, it was going well. And then I came back from vacation and in January right before lead teaching, I was stuck doing this four week matter unit and that was really hard for me and I felt like I was at a disadvantage because everyone else kind of had time to prepare for lead teaching and I was trying to do, finish this unit and get everything ready for lead teaching and I felt overwhehned and overworked... 118 P: That was the unit you did and the kids knew more than you had anticipated. R: Right. Yup....which was more challenging because I couldn't just follow the little book or you know, the materials that she had before and I was trying to think of alternative ways to assess because I had a hard time, just, you know, I had a hard time doing what was expected or just...I was trying to find ways to challenge the kids because they did know how. They knew the difference between a solid, liquid, and a gas and I couldn't, you know, in good conscience spend four weeks on something that they already knew. Then the resolution and perspective shift...and a more stable experience R: So that was a lot more work on my part. And then so I just think that lead teaching started on the wrong foot for me and then I gradually began to lose self confidence. I was doubting myself as a person and as a professional. And then I just wanted to quit. And luckily, I had some good friends who told me that the profession and the children needed me so....then I started, in March, things, those last four weeks of lead teaching, I really felt like, you know, I tried to put things into perspective so then I felt pretty good about stuff. And it's been constant since. [FG, #3, S, 3-4] Rachel's case illustrates the initial experience of surprise at the realities of teaching encroached on her and the subsequent struggles she experienced. Rachel's comments pertain to the challenges of anticipating children's prior knowledge and planning subject matter for children. Reviewing the second pattern through the case of Rachel it is apparent she anticipated one low point in the year during lead teaching. This low point was preceded by the same anticipated ever rising level of comfort as that by Thomas and other Interns. However, Rachel, unlike the others, said she did not experience an immediate high but this arrived rather quickly when she felt comfortable with the ”routine” in her placement. This sense of being comfortable and capable was obliterated by January when she felt ”overwhelmed” and ”depressed." This low point according to Rachel was so discouraging she felt she could not stick with the program. She described 119 spending more and more time sleeping, not feeling like she wanted to engage with the program and what was happening in her placement classroom. Through what she characterized as ”support” from. her fiancee and from fellow Intern Gina she survived this low point and felt more engaged and comfortable in the Internship during the last six weeks of lead teaching in late February and March. While Rachel anticipated a.low point during lead teaching she in no way anticipated the on-going turmoil and intensity of this low point. Summer; In summary, neither Thomas nor Rachel, like the other Interns, anticipated the intensity of the turbulence and personal turmoil that they actually experienced. A number of questions arise from the above analysis of the anticipation and actual experience drawings: the importance of being optimistic, the internship as a cultural transition experience, the role of societal metanarratives in the presentation of a teaching self, the significance of the actual experience drawings as records of growth and development in the context of developmental theory. Wm First, there is the Interns' initial naiveté and its relation to being optimistic -- or the necessity of hope - and the attendant implications for a pedagogy of hope. One could look at the linear anticipation drawings and characterize them as naive and typical of novices in any field of endeavor. Going further, one might make a case for the importance of enlightening Interns early so they do not go into a teacher education program or field placement with unrealistic hopes which might act as a setup for disillusionment. There is undoubtedly a strong case to be made for such a stance. After all if one sought to foster unrealistic hopes one might be accused of being reckless and irresponsible. I do not deny that there is a role for dampening or "cooling off" unrealistic hopes. This might be summed up by a 120 teacher educator being responsible for helping novice teachers set appropriate expectations for themselves, their placement and what can be realistically achieved from entering teaching. However, taking this stance too far unveils the possibility of being so tethered to local realities that neither hope nor the imagination produce, in dialogue with reality, a necessary educative tension. Let me expand on this educative tension. We live in a era dominated by pragmatism of mind and action (Freire, 1995). Fostering wild dreams and unrealistic hopes - it is argued -- is dangerous. What is also equally dangerous, I argue, is the chance of never recognizing the generative role of hope psychologically, pedagogically, and politically. Two responses seem worth noting: not deadening hopes and fostering new hopes. Both types have been addressed in the psychological research on the "positive illusions". Many prominent theorists have argued that accurate perceptions of self, world, and the future are essential for mental health. Yet considerable research evidence suggests that overly positive self- evaluations, exaggerated perceptions of control or mastery, and unrealistic optimism are characteristic of normal thought. Moreover, these illusions appear to promote other criteria of mental health, including the ability to care about others, the ability to engage in productive and creative work. (Taylor, 1988, p. 193). Taylor (1994) notes that "positive illusions" need to be distinguished from denial and repression. Thus, I argue that far from being naive, the Interns', positive illusions are necessary, adaptive and healthy in navigating the difficult realities of the Internship. One intern contrasting her experiences with her anticipations characterized the latter as naive; however, her naiveté may have been productive G: ...In the long run. But looking at it from, just if you just look at it, it's a lot of work and it was a lot of work and it was more than I expected and it made me want, think, actually think about quitting. I mean, that thought never crossed my mind before I started this year...I always knew 121 I was gonna teach but this thing really makes you think twice. So I mean, that's looking at it from two different, I don't know... P: So...if you had to draw this at the beginning then, you didn't really anticipate this. You didn't expect some of these here. And that's what nearly made you quit. G: Oh, yeah. As I told my liaison, walking down the hall, if I wasn't almost finished, I probably would quit. P: Right. But you're nearly finished. G: Right. So I mean, if I would have done this at the beginning of the internship, I might have, I don't think my lows would have been so low and I would have had, I would have probably put in more highs. Cause I had kind of very naive View [FG #3, S, 4] This Intern describes her perspective on the internship "that's looking at it from two different" views: the optimistic view at the outset of the journey and the less optimistic view in hindsight. WWW When looking at contours of the actual experience drawings I was struck by the way they reminded me of a graphical representation I had seen of how international students or immigrants adapt and cope with living in a new culture. My observation was that the actual experience drawings seemed like cultural adaptation contours. Common to both is the general trend of a honeymoon / euphoria followed by a low period when reality's difficulties take hold, often followed by a return to a medium level of comfort. The internship might be productively viewed as a cultural transition experience. Three lessons seem most salient from drawing this comparison. First, the initial euphoria is important in helping interns and immigrants alike delay dealing with all the challenges at once of the their new cultures. Second, the low period for interns then seems analogous to when culture 122 shock sets in for immigrants/ international students. Third, whereas planning tasks and activities in the short term generally tends not to involve issues of self and identity, life-planning and longer term anticipation does surface issues of self and identity. Student teachers enrolled in teacher education programs with shorter teaching practice periods may only experience the identity dimension of learning to teach during their first year as teachers. They often do so in an unsupported fashion. They do not usually have access to the mentoring that may be provided by a university, a mentor teacher and peers. Consequently, the identity journey is more than likely more lonely, turbulent, and possibly less educative. Interns spoke of this first year teacher phenomenon in the urban setting during the final focus group interview. They described how they thought the Internship allowed them to experience what friends of theirs in other teacher education programs were experiencing in a solo and unsupported fashion. For example, in taking short international vacations (tourists rather than immigrants) or when novice teachers make brief visits to classrooms less of the self is at stake. The brevity of these experiences and the certainty of imminent return to home cultures and known roles centers them on activities and tasks rather than on reflection on one’s experience and identity. In contrast, immigration for extended periods into the cultural milieu of a particular classroom inevitably involves planning and anticipation that encompass an identity journey - one that is often turbulent and less smdoth than anticipated. Likewise immigrants more so than vacationers really experience culture shock and the attendant identity journey. h. h _ . A._ , U. ”H”. . . r , . -. a." . , ..': Self, Thinking of the contour lines as story-lines or the basis for a narrative construal of the internship experience connects the Interns' individual story- 123 lines with societal metanarratives. This is based on the assumption that various prototypical contour patterns reflect a store of myths or cultural narratives upon which people draw to understand and construe transitional experiences in particular. Transitional experiences amplify and accentuate the narratives people adopt. Entering a new and challenging situation we need a story to help us make sense of the journey and to anticipate what might happen next. Gergen and Gergen (1988) argue for the cultural embeddedness of narrative forms. Rather than construing our past or future in an infinite variety of ways, we rely on a relatively small repertoire of narrative forms. Rather than being direct and original products of our lives our stories are constructions of our experience. Rather than the individual being the source and possessor of these stories we draw on the available narrative forms in culture, irnbuing them with the particularities and nuances of our self- representations. Gergen and Gergen (1988) present metanarratives as limited rather than infinite, constructs rather than products, and resident in society rather than the individual. Gergen (1991) argues that in recounting stories of self and identity we tend to draw on grand narratives. In the romantic period people viewed themselves as possessing an inner self, ”the deep heart's core” (Yeats, 1996, p. 28), directed by deep personal motives. In the modern period one can speak of a factory-like sense of self, such that people use experiences as input or raw material and manufacture an identity as a product. In both the case of romantics or modernists, Gergen argues, there is an underlying assumption that the individual person possesses a coherent life story. In the postmodern world view, autobiography as the fixed possession of an individual is questioned. The person is viewed as less autonomous and not so much in 124 possession of an autobiography rather as the leasee of a sociography, in that we appropriate one of our culture's grand narratives rather than originate d e n o 00 a personal story. Gergen’s graphical depiction of how the main narratives in Western culture could be represented bears clear resemblance to the range of contours in the lntems' anticipation and actual experience drawings. Gergen outlines three main narratives: the success / the happy ever after; the failure / the tragic; and the epic-hero narrative. A number of observations are salient when analyzing both sets of Intern drawings from viewpoint of the grand cultural narratives depicted by Gergen. The Interns' anticipation drawings are overwhelmingly like the "happy ever after" pattern with an anticipated ever ascending and increasingly positive evaluation of experience over time (Figure 1, p. 113). The actual experience drawings reveal a more complex and problematic array of narratives. Gina’s seems a prototypical case of a tragic narrative, at least as far as the internship is concerned, whereas she seems to anticipate a ’happy ever after’ experience once the internship is over, when she has her own classroom. Describing the experience in April Gina clarified the uninterrupted downward trend in her representation of the intern year commenting that there were ups and downs within the general downward trend. She then nominates the previous night as the upward turning point in this downward, tragic story. G: My low point, I would say would be about half way through lead teaching. Well, okay, so it's a very big low point because it was just half way through lead teaching. I'm not, I wasn't doing any of my own lessons. P: Right G: But that will start at lead teaching so I guess you could say that was a low point. And it really didn't get any better when lead teaching was over. 125 Just because of other situations, other things that were going on. So but there were some, there was some high points to my lead teaching. Even though it was low, there were high points to my lead teaching. P: In that, yeah. G: Within that, and then I really should have probably drawn it like this. Cause that's how things seemed to be going, up and down, up and down, and up and down. But then I get to my turning point, I would say would be last night, I think. Because thing were starting to come together. There was an end very, very soon. I'm gonna be, I've done the job interviewing and I'm gonna have my own classroom. I'm almost done. I don't have to deal with anything any more. I can just... it's all over. So I would, I was feeling like really good last night because things were just going great. My paper was going good, my portfolio was going right, so that was my turning point. And I see, I can only see things getting better. Because if things got any worse, I don't think I could take it. I would just have to crawl into a little hole and sleep a little while, until it got better. So I should really, I guess it should go like this. [FG #3, S, 2] She then drew a series of small ups and downs during the trough at the bottom of the low point in her remembered story-line” All the other Interns' story-line drawings from September to May looked similar to each other and were characterized by an up and down pattern. This pattern is characteristic of Gergen's "epic-hero" metanarrative. Interns' comments support this claim. Gina's narrative seems to go from tragic, to epic-heroic, then she anticipates a happy-ever-after story line for her first year as a teacher. Indeed it is interesting to speculate whether Gina's epic-hero addendum to her tragic narrative is an example of a broader pattern in which people leave behind a tragic narrative by taking on an epic-hero narrative. Gina's comment about the eventual up and down nature of her experience during lead teaching within the general downward trajectory were echoed by other Interns as they spoke of the Intern year K: That's how I'm thinking about it. Cause it's gonna, it's gonna benefit me. All my work and all my ups and downs are gonna be worth it. 126 The others' drawings of remembered comfort levels resemble the epic-hero narrative. September to May all but Gina manifest the trough and peak contours typical of the epic-hero narrative pattern. The actual experience drawings reproduced in Figure 1 represent the Interns' past only through May; I also asked each intern to continue the line projecting forward in anticipation of their first year of teaching. Examining just this part of the drawings - May onward -- again presents a more complex array of narratives than the remembered anticipation drawings. While similar to the actual experience drawings, the projected future drawings are less extreme than the archetypal case of an epic hero '5 trials and triumphs. Take for example Rachel and Kelly’s first year teaching anticipations (Figure 1). Both have the same epic hero patterns as that which they depicted in the actual experience. However they anticipate lower peaks and higher troughs. Rachel shared her thoughts when I remarked on this pattern: P: But it's not the sort of thing, looking at the, looking at past, in the last few months, there is, there are higher highs and lower lows than you see in the future. It's sort of more, it's more consistent in a narrower band in the future. R: Right. Because I can learn from this year and know that if this is what I'm going to do then I don't have to feel like that and think that I wanta quit. I mean, sure, I might entertain the thought but I won't really consider it like I did. And hopefully I won't be so depressed. I mean, I was really down and I hope to be a little bit more steady. And I think this year has hopefully given me what I need to not be so emotional. They therefore anticipate challenges smaller than those experienced during the intern year, and view themselves as ready to meet them. Both Rachel and Kelly who anticipated epic-hero story-lines in the future supported this view in their verbal descriptions with what some might characterize as 127 "realistic" expectations about the limitations on finding a balance between their personal and professional lives. P: K: Right. What do the others think? What do you think about the future, having had this year experience? Well, I think, I kind of agree with what Rachel had drawn on hers. Kind of what I was thinking...l mean, I know there'll still be highs and lows. I'm planning on still having highs and lows. I think that's kind of a natural, you know, flow for something like this. But I'm hoping that they're, instead of like this, they're, you know, like that. That I can learn to not let a low at work be such a personal low. Right. I think to a certain degree...that [it] can make you a good teacher that you make it really personal. But there also comes a point where you need to, you know, be able to go home and not think about school all night. [FG #3, S, 4-5] Curious about the balance both Rachel and Kelly were striving for between their personal and professional lives and how this might impact their anticipated first year teaching I asked Kelly to elaborate. The subsequent conversation suggests that there was some consensus among the Interns that finding a balance between personal and professional was implicated in the anticipated stabilization of the epic-hero narratives. P: K: That's an interesting phrase that you used. Not to let a low at work become a personal low. You sort of... Let it have less power to do that. I mean, I was thinking, I don't honestly think that you can't do it at all either. I mean, for me anyway, I don't think that I could ever not let something that, you know, horrible that happened at school not affect the other parts of my life but I would hope to make it less. It seems like doing your interning, it like consumes every part of you. You know, and I'm hoping that that's limited a little more in the future. 128 P: Yeah, somebody mentioned in one of the interviews that the internship sort of invades every space of your life. R: Uh huh. Iagree. G: I don't think I have a life. P: Right. But I mean, if you sort of think ahead, I mean, when you're teaching, you hope you have a, you're going to plan for one? G: A little bit better than then. I mean, I don't plan on reverting back to when I was in college or anything...and I'm anticipating the first couple of years being quite tough. But not as tough as this. [FG # 3, S, 5] Listening to the Interns' verbal descriptions lends support to my claim that the graphical depictions were related to specific metanarratives. The conversational exchange above and what follows between Rachel, Kelly, Gina and I, discussing the depth of the lows and the height of the highs in their projected drawings, helps explain their less turbulent epic-hero anticipations. Central to understanding their recollected and anticipated epic- hero narrative is the sense of personal agency and capacity to meet daily challenges: to rebound from each low. Rachel talks about how during her first year teaching she anticipates being more able (i.e., increasing agency) to find a balance in her life. P: Right. G: But eventually, I'll... R: I think stability. I mean, we just talked, you know, in our interview and we talked about this. But you know, now the whole thing about being on someone else's schedule and when I have my own class, I'll be able to make the decision if I'm having a rough day, maybe I'll go home right after school that day. And I won't stay until dark. I would like to try to make more of a separation between this and my at home life. P: Right. 129 K: There needs to be some time for me. Maybe I'll read a book. Wouldn't that be interesting! And yet, partly with the way you were describing personal and work or professional, they can't not be related in some ways, too, though. Right. I don't think it can be totally separate. I think that I'm always, you know, for example, you know, we were having this concern about a student before we went to break, you know, with his home situation. His parents were in a bloody custody battle and I mean, I think that will always bother me. You know, I think maybe you know, as time goes on I can learn to leave it a little more. I mean, I was having dreams about this kid. I wanta at least sleep without thinking about it. So... you know, I'm hoping that I can separate more as time goes on. Yeah, that's interesting. Listening to the interviews from various different people, and you recounting about dreaming about it, the internship not only invades your days. It invades your nights as well. Completely. [PG #3 S 5.6] Peppered through the conversation about how things will be different in the future are Interns' references to "my own classroom" or "my own room" in which they anticipate being less constrained than when working with a CT as Kelly describes. K: Well, I think I will know a lot more in a few years, just because I will have had a bigger variety of experience. And more of a chance to try a lot of things. It feels like I have a lot of ideas now and there's not time for all of them. You know, and when I get into my own room where I get to decide what's most important, what I want to do, you know, I'll be able to try more of those out. You know, so I think basically just, you know, more experience of course. [Kit], 12] Rachel, in contrast, sees the first few years teaching as involving measured consolidation rather than the free rein Kelly anticipates. Furthermore, it is only what Rachel really values, "things that I think are necessary or I deem worthy", that will stake a claim on her time and energy. Thus, for Rachel, 130 personal meaning is part of her anticipation of how she will choose and teach "those extra things". R: Oh, definitely. Absolutely. If I, you know, like you were saying, if only I had my own classroom or when I have my own classroom, because then I can choose some of those extra things. I mean, when you have to be realistic. As a first year teacher, I don't see myself doing all kinds of extra things. I see myself following the curriculum pretty much, you know, getting done what I need to get done. And then after I'm more comfortable, you know, with myself and with the role, I see myself doing extra things. But then there will be things that I think are necessary or I deem worthy. [R #2, 7] To complete this extended analysis of the story-line narratives I quote a section of transcript in which the Rachel, Kelly, Gina, Hilary and I discuss their projected futures. They talk about being optimistic as the default stance toward the future. Kelly, however, adopts an epic-hero narrative for her projected future at the end of this discussion. P: So everybody here drew one as well. So you can see the difference...you wanta show the different so she gets a sense of...so you can see the people are quite different. So we're looking at this part of it here, looking at, and I noticed in the other school, people drew something as pretty straight to the future, or it was either straight and rising. Yeah, straight or rising. Whereas here, a lot of change. People are thinking about. Do you want to take, if you want to take a minute and just think about it. Okay. Okay. So when you look at, you think about the future, I mean, you have sort of things moving up and up and you have things up and down, what will contribute to the up and down or what will contribute to sort of the rising tide of expectations? What will ensure that? Oh, the rising? Yeah, everything seems to be... Well, I sure hope it gets better. 131 1? Okay I mean, it rises, but I know I'm gonna have my ups and downs but I just don't think I'm gonna hit a low that low. Because it won't be...what will make it different? I'm just hoping. I'm trying to be optimistic about my future. Right. Okay. Does some of it have to do with the place, this change of setting? Proximity to the parents and all that? Oh, yeah, of course. But I think a lot of it has to do with the setting. The school or the classroom or? The community. Right. The school, the classroom. Okay. So what do you think, Kelly, about...you have some ups and downs. How do you attribute those? Well, I mean, I kind of attribute my ups and downs to the same kind of things that I had ups and downs for this year. If I, when feeling unsure about something, if I'm struggling, you know, with how to teach something, that may be kind of a low. You know, and if I work at it and, you know, figure out some new strategies that may be a high, you know. Or other things. Discipline problems or whatever. To me that just struck me as that's how it would be is kind of a constant up and down. [FG #3, S, 10-11] For these Interns, then, a more stable version of the epic-hero narrative is what they anticipate. A sense of personal agency in the face of the challenging daily realities of teaching characterizes of the epic-hero narrative: "...if I work at it...figure out some new strategies that may be a hig ...". Michelle's comment about the key unknown in teaching supports an epic-hero narrative construal of teaching since teachers often struggle with difficult classes. The inevitable up and down nature of teaching is conveyed 132 to Michelle by her CT. As Michelle then says the point she is trying to make is that it is hard not knowing about the children she will eventually teach. P: Michelle, you were going to say M: Yeah, I kinda agree with what Olga was saying. I think what she was trying to say is like because we have such a good group, you know, good group of kids, we don't know how our kids will be, you know, for whatever job, teaching job we have. It's with every class, there's a different type of children. And I'm happy to, my CT, too, she was talking about how, you know, you're gonna get a year where you have a good group of kids and the next year might be, you know, a disaster. It's up and down. So the point I'm trying to make, it's hard not knowing, what kind of group of children am I going to get? I was able to handle this group of children, because they were like this, but what about you know... it's like the unknown. P: That's interesting because flipping back between working with individuals and groups is one big thing in teaching. You're talking now about groups of kids, working with a group of kids. You know, and sometimes a teacher will spend a lot of time talking about individual kids. But there is something about a groups chemistry. [FG #3, U, 10] «SOIL: .10‘1‘I - 91-. .n; o. {a o ._ o o. .n 2". Ir ' our: Developmentalists have presented models of growth that have come in for frequent criticism. Critics point to the prescriptive function of developmental models (Bruner, 1986), chiding some developmentalists for hiding behind a veil of objectivity when the latter claim they are merely describing development. However, my concern here about representations of development is the over-reliance on either linear models or an inverted ’U’ or ’U’ shaped curve. Let me make one point before addressing how we might think of representing growth. It is fashionable to castigate anything linear in representations of human growth or inverted U-functions of growth common in developmental psychology textbooks (Meacham, 1997). The criticism is based on a concern, often justified, about how some linear models 133 of growth may smooth out and oversirnplify the actual subtle troughs and peaks, regressions and progressions, of human change and development. In the context of this study however, the Interns' relatively linear representations of their anticipated experience and projected experiences draws attention to the role of the linear in the phenomenology of the Internship experience and teaching. The Interns' representations of their remembered experiences support Meacham's (1997) observation about the limitations of developmentalists' inverted U-shaped functions to characterize human growth. Based on his comparison of college student biographies with his reading of developmental journals he comments: I had expected on the basis of reading developmental journals and textbooks to find among the student autobiographies numerous life stories that could be described as growth curves, that is, series of achievements in a given domain, with each achievement building on the previous ones. However, there were only a few instances of this image or pattern of change and development...to my surprise, roughly a third of the autobiographies can be described not as growth curves or as inverted U—functions, but instead as U-shaped functions. That is, life was preceding well until an obstacle arose or some misfortune occurred, after which there was a struggle to restore life to its proper course (1997, p. 49). Many graphical abbreviations of growth and development have been suggested in social science literature in different domains of human change and development. Strauss (1982), among others, has made the case that many aspects of human growth appear to have a ’U’ shaped developmental trajectory and that many human functions over the life-span appear to have an inverted ’U’ shape. Others have proposed a learning curve with a steep upward trend which later plateaus. As useful as these models may be in their respective domains it is hard to see how any might adequately represent both the linear and non-linear aspects of the Internship experience. None would 134 seem to be able to do justice to the roller-coaster-like series of ’U’s and inverted ’U’s needed to characterize Interns' representation of the internship year. Proponents of the above noted developmental models might object to classifying the actual experience contour drawings as valid records of change and development since the common metric, comfort might be the inverse of growth. However, taking both the Interns’ graphical depictions and verbal descriptions together, the Interns' attributions of when they experienced growth are worthy of being taken seriously. Furthermore, proponents of the above models of human growth might claim that what is really at issue here in the contrast between the Interns' representation of their year long experience and the grand graphical abbreviations of development is grain size. They might make a case that the troughs and peaks of the internship experience are merely blips on the screen in the long haul of a teacher’s career. However, my response here is that there are likely to be many more blips on the screen that may be overlooked by rigid adherence to the grand graphical abbreviations. For example, Huberman’s (1989) classic research on the teaching life—course of Swiss teachers looks somewhat like an inverted ’U’. Here again what is missing, and what may go unheard by educators in teacher education programs, is the turbulence, unanticipated by many student teachers, that belies the steady growth or decline portrayed in the inverted ’U’ shaped representations of a career. Summary Ms. Let me summarize my claims based on the story-line activity at this point. The extended analysis of the anticipation, actual experience, and projected future drawings serves a useful purpose in setting 135 the stage for elaborating on the Interns' anticipatory reflection. So far I have presented and discussed the contour drawings addressing individual differences, extending the analysis by comparing the internship to a cultural transition, and comparing patterns in the drawings with representations. of some of our culture’s grand cultural narratives. muse. The degree of surprise the Interns felt during their field experience year is, I think, the most notable theme to emerge. This surprise results from dramatic contrasts between the Interns' anticipations of a 'happy-ever—after' story—line and lived experiences of either an epic-hero pattern or a tragic pattern. Another issue worth addressing is that grand cultural narratives are unconscious tools with which people semiotically constrain their experience of the present and their imagining of the future (Valsiner , 1993). Here I am thinking in particular of the Interns' projections into the future at the end of the Internship. As with their reconstructions of past the Interns rely on a similar repertoire of narrative constructions. The mediational role of narrative has a two fold function. Interns lease cultural narratives and also embody this narrative with nuances of their local realities or anticipated realities. Finally, the comparison I draw between the Interns' experience learning to teach as a cultural transition, akin to immigrants or international students living or studying abroad for a prolonged period, highlights the centrality of identity development in learning to teach. This study addresses two main questions in relation to anticipatory reflection. (1) What are the changes in anticipatory reflection that occur over the internship? and (2) To what can these changes be attributed? 136 In the preceding analysis I sought to partially address both questions using the annotated story-lines the interns drew, wrote and spoke about to represent their experience. This analysis suggests that the Interns' anticipatory narratives remained somewhat similar despite the turbulence of their experiences. Both the Interns' representations of their Intern year anticipations and their anticipations of their first year of teaching were characterized a happy-ever-after narrative. Thus, anticipation was characterized by stability in narrative choice rather than by change. However, Rachel's and Kelly's drawings appear to adopt a condensed or less turbulent epic-hero narrative. This is an interesting phenomenon since assessments of people's learning are usually correlated with the degree to which they have profited from and adapted to experiences. Thus we might hypothesize that those Interns whose first year anticipatory drawings match the turbulent experience closest have transferred more adequately than those who revert to the happy-ever-after narrative despite a turbulent experience. This raises the question of who learned from the internship? Was it the Interns who stuck with the happy-ever-after narrative despite the turbulent experience? What was learned? Did some learn that the happy-ever—after narrative, however "inaccurate", might be adaptive in the future? Thomas made a comment to suggest that he at least adopted the happy-ever-after narrative knowing that it might be inaccurate. Did others learn that a condensed version of the epic-hero might work best, be more "accurate", in the future? Kelly and Rachel, anticipating a less turbulent epic-hero narrative, both commented on feeling more capable of dealing with the daily "ups and downs" of teaching having experienced the internship. Thus even Interns who anticipate the epic-hero narrative were hopeful or optimistic that 137 these narratives would be less turbulent; in short that teaching will get better or easier. To the second question -- to what can these changes be attributed -- my analysis of the story-lines activity suggests that choice of anticipatory narratives can be attributed to societal metanarratives. Identifying the reason for change in choice remains elusive. A reliance on a small store of narratives is what seems to characterize both the internship anticipation and the first year anticipation. Anticipatory narratives appear more stable than change oriented. Valsiner's hypothesis that our reliance on constraining mechanisms that semiotically mediate our representations of the future in the present support and may help explain why anticipatory narratives remain stable. How do we represent the future? For many the answer is the happy- ever-after narrative. For others the answer is the less turbulent and less demanding epic-hero narrative. However, in the case of those who adopted the epic-hero narrative the anticipatory narrative remained similar. . . v n I will now return to an earlier phase ofthe Internship to take up the theme of hope in the context of a drawing and annotation activity ('Current‘ and 'Hoped for' classroom) I asked the Interns to complete during the second Guided Practice seminar focus group meeting in February. This exercise provided an opportunity for Interns to both gain some reflective distance from the immediacy of their practicum setting and to explicitly acknowledge the tensions and conflicts they were experiencing between their actual and hoped for teaching self. Freppon and MacGillivary (1996) describe a imaginative or prospective oriented reflection activity in which student 138 teachers also grappled with many tensions around self as teacher. I first present my rationale for choosing such an activity and then address the issue of hope as pedagogically and psychologically important during the transitions of the Internship. ' Interns' hankering for independence from their CT and the comment "when I have my own classroom" during the first round of interviews in December alerted me to a theme best described as ’holding my breath-when I have my own classroom’ for the sake of being temporarily consistent with the collaborating teacher. This sense of not being at home or sensing some cultural discontinuities is analogous to cultural alienation in other spheres of life. Following this up in the second round of focus group meetings in February, the theme seemed to have crystallized as a key issue for many Interns. For example, Olga spoke about having "my own classroom" in a number of different ways during the first interview in December. She spoke of fears she was grappling with and viewed having her own classroom as a significant factor in allaying her discomfort. O I hope that all the questions I have now are answered. And they're not questions but just fears and I just wanta feel independent and you know, like I don't need another teacher around to help me. Not that I don't want help but I mean, I can just have MY OWN CLASSROOM and feel comfortable running my own classroom. [0 #1, 1190] Having already substitute taught Olga construed having her own classroom as giving her greater curricular freedom as well as being out of the judgmental spotlight. 0 You know, then I feel kinda awkward in that position. Whereas if I have MY OWN CLASSROOM, if it doesn't work, it didn't work and you know, I'm not being judged or anything like that. So I think that's kinda hard sometimes. 139 [o #1, 1366] Other Interns quickly acknowledged this theme when I brought up this theme. Michelle spoke about the frustrations of working on her CT's time schedule as follows: M: But it's really hard to get everything you want them to know into just a half an hour. So that's still a problem and there's really, there's really no way of getting around it except for you're just going to have to cut it short all the time, you know. That's why I'm looking forward to MY OWN CLASSROOM. [M#2, 777] Noticing the "holding my breath until I have my own classroom" theme drew me to think of ways of exploring this further with the Interns in the second focus group meeting in February. I devised a drawing activity in which I asked each Intern to draw and annotate their current and hoped for setting and their place within each setting respectively. In the context of this drawing activity a central issue expressed by Interns was the need they felt to maintain a certain consistency in their teaching style involving alignment with their collaborating teacher in class management and instructional practices. The main issue is that in dealing with the felt tensions around self, curriculum, and management many Interns resorted to resolving these tensions, at least in part, by claiming that once that had their own classroom the problems would disappear. There was a range in the tension Interns felt, from high to low, between their classroom setting and their hoped for setting. In the following section I summarize their annotations about self, setting, and perceived Intern—CT tension as well as their graphical depictions of students, centers and physical layout of the classroom for both current and hoped for drawings. I examined the drawings on a number of criteria and developed a 140 rubric with the following four main categories: self, students, tension, and setting, which included the sub-categories of physical layout and centers. These categories in the rubric are summarized in Table 7. Both of Rachel's, Gina's and Hillary's 'Current' and 'Future/Ideal' drawings are in Figures 1, 2, 3 respectively as samples of what the Interns drew in this activity. I will summarize my observations under each main category in turn. Analyzing the four Current and Hoped for Setting drawings and annotations drew my attention to three themes: 1) the general trend among Interns in both schools to move away from too much structure and move toward greater openness, creating space, and flexibility, 2) the differences in level of tension perceived by Interns between themselves and their collaborating teachers in the two school settings, and 3) the limits on what the interns were or felt able to anticipate in their future teaching settings. Melingmmpemesmmxibfligc The most notable difference between the two schools was the overwhelming manner in which the ’Current’ drawings and attendant comments of the suburban Interns addressed the highly controlled, structured and directive nature of the teaching culture in the Interns' practicum classrooms. All four Interns in the suburban building wanted more open and freer classroom environments in their ’Hoped for’ settings. The urban Interns, in contrast, felt that their classrooms were places that already were relatively flexible and they hoped for a similarly flexible future setting. This difference in perspective on classrooms on a inflexible-flexible continuum seemed to explain the different level of perceived Intern-CT tension between Interns in the two schools. Rachel, like the other suburban Interns, described a sharp contrast between her ”crowded and closed-in” placement classroom and her ”open 141 and inviting” hoped for classroom. Commenting further on her current setting she said Basically I feel the same way about my teaching in this room. It is quantity rather than quality. I feel like there is too much to do (extra stuff, not in the curriculum). It’s a very intense classroom Her hoped for classroom in marked contrast had space for children to touch things and do things...classroom with no defined front where teacher stands...windows with sunlight shining in and sixteen children not twenty four On the other hand the more urban Interns mentioned how they wanted to continue what they were seeing in their placement classrooms. Brendan, an urban Intern only involved in the focus group part of study, commented on how he wanted to Table 7 Current and Ideal Classroom Rubric. Teacher Students Setting Tension Presence / absence Presence / absence Space High - large/ small Prominence Generic/ Detailed Furniture Medium Configuration Low ...perpetuate the teaching philosophy of my collaborating teacher by creating a learning environment that can accommodate both ’teacher- centered’ and ’student-centered’ activities. I want to provide areas where students can work individually and collaboratively. For example, I want to create a reading center where students must work silently in a ”cozy” 142 setting with comfortable furniture. I like the table concept for desks. It provides a certain degree of privacy while also promoting collaboration. [BF-U-FG#2] Michelle, also in the urban school, commented on her current setting as follows: we are a center based classroom. Every part of my room is related to a particular subject. This takes place mostly during morning. The afternoon is saved for whole group Much of what she has seen in her placement classroom is appealing and she then remarks how: I would still have the same classroom - however I will be teaching 2nd or 3rd grade. I will have a bigger carpet area with a couch. This would also be their library area for reading. I will have centers 3 days of the week. Most of the time will be whole group Michelle’s hoped for classroom is then not too distant from the one she experienced during her internship. Moving towards openness and flexibility was a theme supported by my analysis of the setting , consisting of space and the configuration of furniture in the drawings. The most notable aspect of the future oriented drawings was the degree to which they suggested that the Interns were trying to create space. However, another way of interpreting this is to claim that rather than creating space they were unable to fill space. But, the latter suggests a limitation on their capacity to engage in anticipatory reflection. However, the former hypothesis of creating space seems more convincing when viewed with the supporting evidence of the annotations attached to the drawings. A number of Interns clearly expressed a hope to create classroom environments in which there was a more open use of space. Overall, the hoped for configuration was more like a circle or u-shaped class arrangement compared 143 to the more square like current drawings. Rachel and Gina, for example, envisaged moving toward a large group circle space. Be it small or large circles their desired classroom would have children in a seating configuration that favors some whole group activities. Four of the Interns, for example, favored one circular or u-shaped large group arrangement in preference to a number of small groups or a two large rectangular desk configuration. 144 Figure 2 Rachel's Current 8: Future Drawings 145 Figure 3 Gina's Current 8: Future Drawings 146 Figure 4 Hillary's Current 8: Future Drawings 147 Tn' larmanlnrnh df lar The suburban Interns expressed a greater sense of frustration and dissatisfaction about the overly structured and directive nature of their building and classrooms. All interns in both schools were equally emphatic about how they hoped for more open, flexible, child-centered classrooms. I developed a measure of the degree of tension falling into three levels (high, medium, and low) based on a combination of the Interns’ comments about how divergent their current and hoped for settings are and the actual differences I interpreted between the current and hoped for drawings. An illustration from one the Interns in the suburban school will be useful in understanding the higher level of tension they felt between the current and hoped for setting. Gina who felt very hemmed in by the perfectionism and directive style of her placement commented on her room in very pointed manner G: My room is very cutesie and always needs to have some kind of decoration up. The kids go to centers for most of the day; we do start out as a large group on the rug. Everything must be in it’s place and just about perfect. The kids need to follow directions and pay consequences if they do not. There are must dos and fun dos. My role is to run the day and guide the children. Discipline is the key. There can not be a wasted minute. [FG # 2, Reflection Sheet] This comment was made a half an hour after Gina had entered the Guided Practice seminar very upset at the way her teacher had taken a dismissive attitude to one of her main university course assignments: the Intern inquiry project. Her CT had sent books home with the kids that Gina needed in school to complete her assignment. The CT was getting tired of Gina’s project. When she had calmed herself, Gina continued by describing her hoped for classroom as more open and flexible: 148 G: I want a classroom with a lot of open space. I want a book area with pillows making it interesting. I want a texture table open all the time. Creation stations open all the time. Large group area. Manipulatives open to the kids. Children free to explore and create...My ideal classroom will have no more than 18 kids. [FG # 2, Reflection Sheet] Both Gina and Rachel’s hoped for classrooms diverge considerably from those they experienced in their settings. Kelly and Hillary, the other two Interns in the building, described similarly divergent settings. Hillary's in particular contrasted the current and the hoped for sharply: My classroom is very teacher oriented. Much of our school day is spent sitting at the table doing some sort of seat work. I feel that the atmosphere in our room is very controlled. The control is in the hands of the teacher, not the students. [FG # 2, Reflection Sheet] In contrast, almost in pendulum like fashion, she describes her hoped for classroom: I would like to have a child-centered classroom. I want pictures of children on the walls as well as children’s artwork. I want to have centers in my classroom like a creation station, an art center, a math center, a reading center, etc. There would still be structured learning (children sitting and raising hands) time as well as center times everyday. I see my self as the ”facilitator of learning” as opposed to dictating what they are learning for every activity, everyday . [FG # 2, Reflection Sheet] All of these examples from the annotations to the current and hoped for drawings clearly give a sense of the contrasting level of tension perceived by the Interns in the two settings. Limitations on anticipating hoped for classroom. Limitations on what the Interns could anticipate seemed apparent in two domains: depicting themselves as a teacher and students. More of the 149 current drawings (4 of 8) than hoped for (0 of 8) drawings had the Intern included. In Gina's and Rachel’s this depiction was of a scale appropriate figure whereas in Hillary's and Michelle’s the teacher looms larger than life. One might wonder then why the Interns did not draw themselves into their hoped for setting. Was it too difficult to imagine themselves in these settings? Is it easier to concentrate on drawing the physical layout as they anticipate their hoped for classrooms? Might the emphasis they put on the physical layout, rather than drawing themselves illustrate their sensitivity to portraying their emerging sense of classroom geography and how it impacts the learning community? Thus the emphasis may not, from their viewpoint, be solely on picturing themselves but on imagining a certain type of setting and the learning it may or may not facilitate? Students: Again curiously absent in five of the hoped for/ future drawings were depictions of students. My main observation with regard to students is that the future oriented drawings are less likely to be peopled. While two pairs of drawings had students in both current and hoped for settings and two pairs had students in neither, the absence of people, self or other, begs the question about the difficulty of imagining the personal and interpersonal compared to the actual physical layout of classrooms. Summary The "holding my breath until I have my own classroom" dimension of anticipation appeared to crystallize during the Spring semester. Why might this be so? Rachel's comments in December about how she changed from a focus on being like her CT to developing her own teacher identity is characteristic of this change in Interns' orientation with a consequent 150 anticipation of what might be in their own imagined classroom. Her comments also allude to the development of self as teacher as an explanation R: I wanted to learn another style/ approach to teaching through my CT. I was interested in picking out things from her that I could use in my own teaching practice. I was a careful observer of my CT. I observed what she said and did as well as how she did things...Again I observed and took copious notes. I used her as a jumping off point to perpetuate my own growth. Now I am more focused on observing and reflecting on my own behaviors. My interpretation of this change is the increasing premium over time on Interns' emerging identities and sense of self as a teacher. Focusing on Interns' anticipatory reflection may be at the leading edge of their identity development. Thus there appears to be a move from fusion to individuation crystallized into Interns imagining themselves being a teacher in another place over the course of the Internship. Fusion being Interns' desire to be closely aligned with their CT compared to individuation as Interns press for a sense of themselves as a teacher. Furthermore, the focus on anticipatory reflection may bring forth the Interns' imminent individuation and identity journey. The "holding your breath until I have my own classroom" phenomenon raises a number of important themes in thinking about how Interns anticipate the core aspects of their teaching practicum. These themes address the role of differences, collaboration and match in the mentoring- mentee experiences and relationships. First, imagine if the Interns adopted an alternative stance to "when I am in my own classroom", such that they viewed the tension between themselves and their CT's as educative. One could imagine an Intern in this scenario claiming that ”If I do not try out some of my own ideas and start conversations about differences now, I may 151 always end up holding my breath and putting off discussing differences in teaching style and substance until the conditions are right...a time that might never arrive”. Second, the focus on collaboration in teacher education literature obscures the generative role of cognitive and teaching dissonance. While a naive conception of collaboration glosses over differences, a challenging and less naive view accepts the naturalness and ubiquity of mismatch. Considerable weight has been put on the importance of matching prospective teachers with mentor teachers in teacher education. Consequently, less emphasis has been put on addressing how all mentees might raise differences in style, preferences and goals in the practicum setting. The ubiquity of mismatch rather than match in mentor-mentee relationship, as expressed in the current versus hoped for classroom drawings, provides a starting point in addressing tension between CT and Interns. The "when I have my own classroom" phenomenon and the Current/Hoped for classroom drawing activity make a case for the importance of Interns' anticipatory reflection as an active part of their present experience. Thus, an active part of present reflection is thinking about what might be in contrast to what is. I . | l . E l . l l E The findings on teacher concerns, as long-standing and supported by numerous studies as they are, result in an unexamined stance toward apprentice teachers. This unexamined stance privileges concerns and anxieties over novice teachers' aspirations and hopes. In the following content analysis I describe and categorize the Interns' expressed teaching related hopes and fears from September, through December, February, and April. The Interns' pattern of hopes and fears presents anticipation as an 152 active and dynamic aspect of Interns’ experiences while learning to teach. Three themes emerged after a content analysis of the teaching related hopes and fears: self and relationships. Relationship encompasses interpersonally oriented hopes and fears [parents, children, CT-IT relationships, class management, relational issues under self as teacher] arising from the content analysis and the relationship issues raised in the context of the drawing activities [e.g., CT-TT tension]. Another is the domain of self, encompassing anticipation of time and goals set by self and others. Self encompasses themes from the content analysis of hopes and fears. Within these three themes a number of sub-themes were salient. Time, resources, and goals set by self emerged as significant under the category of self. Goals identified by self can be further divided into five categories: (i) attaining expectations of others, (ii) becoming a certain type of person in terms of relationships, (iii) becoming in terms of developing knowledge, (iv) becoming in terms of self-improvement, (v) becoming in terms of career goals. Within the category of relationships care, power, and pedagogical content knowledge were salient. I do not present the Interns' life-related hopes and fears save to remark that overall they remained very stable across the course of the study in contrast to the Interns' teaching related hopes and fears. Indeed, this observation about the relative stability of the life related hopes and fears in contrast to changing teaching related hopes and fears suggests that Interns' teaching related anticipations are not only active but changing regularly during the lntemship. One final remark about the Interns' life related hopes and fears is that they were typical: they wanted to get married, have families, be happy and be healthy. For some these were immediate hopes, as was the case for Rachel, who got married the month after the internship finished; whereas the others hoped marriage and children would happen within five 153 years or shortly thereafter. Two Interns hoped to travel for a year or two before settling down. an 1 a h' Hopes and fears are about change. Novice teachers' hopes and fears about teaching are about change in the context of learning to teach. Hope signifies a desire for a better ’present’ in the future and fear points to anxiety about a worse or undesirable ’present’ in the future. Change, from this perspective, then is about what is to be approached — expressed as hopes - and what is to be avoided - expressed as fears. Taking a perspective on learning to teach as enculturation and participation in and transformation of a particular community of practice presents the possibility of thinking about hopes and fears as beundary markers in the transforrnative process. The following section describes and discusses the Interns' teaching related hopes and the strategies Interns adopted to attain their stated aspirations. HopesmLatedJojeaching I adopted five categories to assess the thematic changes in Interns' hopes over time. These five categories that emerged from my analysis of the data are: hopes related to teaching self, to children, to curriculum and instruction, to university expectations, and to classroom management/ control. The Interns' teaching related hopes that loomed largest are documented in Table 8 and summarized by theme in Table 9. Examples of expressed hopes in each category are as follows: 0 Self as Teacher: "1 hope I can be fun and laid back" Thomas, "I hope I can be positive and caring" Rachel; 154 0 Children: "I hope children can all have the same resources" Gina; 0 Curriculum and Instruction: "1 hope I can teach subjects effectively" Thomas, "I hope I learn more about teaching subject matter to Kindergartners" Rachel'; 0 University Expectations: "1 hope I can complete my portfolio" Olga; 0 Classroom Management: "I hope I can manage the kids - the whole class by myself" Michelle. Varying number and increasing complexity of hopes. Over the course of the year the Interns hopes seemed t0‘get more specific and locally defined and more numerous than the more generic aspirations they spoke of in September. This is not surprising save that it reiterates the case for an emphasis on contextual factors in understanding human development. Interns tended, but not exclusively, to think of more specific goal like hopes (”to develop shared reading center” Olga in February) later in the year than the more broad aspirational type earlier (”hope to be a teacher who has control of children and learning” Olga speaking of her hopes in September). Veenman's (1984) meta-analysis of research on teacher concerns presented a strong case for the prominence of classroom management during the early years of learning to teach. Surprisingly among the Interns in this study class management was only a prominent hope in September. My interpretation is that the teacher concern literature focus on fears/ anxieties/ concerns portrays a conservative picture of novice teachers: concerned about discipline and adopting a custodial approach to teaching. Focusing on prospective teachers' hopes presents a contrasting picture in which they seem also engaged with curriculum and self as teacher related aspirations. ' 155 Scanning the changing hopes over the year the Interns' aspirations during September, December, and February tend to be focused on teaching self and curriculum / instruction rather than management or the children. What draws these novice teachers forward is not control or power but the particular identity they envision for themselves as teachers and the enactment of this in a particular curricular and instructional manner. In April, at the end of the school year, the immediate goals of fulfilling university coureswork requirements loom prominently and this was the only time this category of goal was mentioned. Similarly, with regard to children there was no mention of children in September but by December this was a category which remained in February and April. Two final observations are, I think, important: the predominance of curriculum / instruction and self as teacher hopes in mid-year and the perennial focus on the teaching self. First, during December and February curriculum and instruction was mentioned a lot compared to September or April. This may reflect an ”in the trenches” or curricular immersion phenomenon during the middle internship where subject matter and curriculum issues are being confronted on a daily basis. Second, various hopes related to self as teacher remained a constant feature throughout the year. Interns, however, differ on the degree to which issues of self and identity are prominent as aspirations. Rachel, for example, mentioned teaching self related hopes more often than other Interns and chalked up eight of the eighteen mentions in this category. This raises the question as to why this was the case as well as whether this can be seen as desirable and indicative of the reflective practitioner ideal or more indicative of self absorption. 156 Figure 5 Domains of Anticipatory Reflection based upon Content Analysis of Teaching Related HOpes and Fears. th>QOQ_O>r OOZ...mZ... XZOErmUQm “yr/Zégfififlgfio @mflwfimiwjrgz mmr>._._Ozm_.=_um 0.02% mm... n03 mmrn- Um