_. ~1<:.().~\\.\~~~~ :~'AAX.~. ' 19'b. THE BUBBLE. , =----- NO. 1. Single Copies, 6 Cis. LANSING, KAY 30, l8G8. Hezekiah Z. Solemnstyle, Editor. Tnl£ BUnDL:B wlll be published OCco.sl0Dl\lly. nt Pl'etent, by tho Stolenl Peu Ynnkers' So Ciety. nt tho Agdcultnrnl College. Correspondence sollolted. All Communications must be (HldrC88ed to the f3ltCRltTAltY a},' THE 8. P. Y. 8., MI('ll. STATlt,AaR' LCOLLWR. I SALUTATOR,Y. We suppose It to be a fact, that no grent enterpriseWRS ever started with out a occusioning multitude of ques tions, and rendering necessary a long account of the whys, the wherefores, and the prohabUities of the undertak ing. Such being the cose, we find It our duty, unpleasant though it may be, In the event of sending om this, our .lit tle paper, to begin it by "rltlng an editorial, setting forth the designs of the publisher •. Our denr Public need not be fright ened nt our sudden advent. \Vemean her no harm; but, on the contrary,' hope to do her much good i at Ienst, we nre ~Olllgto try. "Anotner neW8~ paper I' 80me one may exclaim; :'und pray, havo we not R. sufficient num ber, nay. too many in circulation al~ ready JH PiU1se a moment, friend. This Is an unusual oue. It Is different from any yon have ever seen! It may be humorous, Jike Punch; or, Wise, Hke the Atlantic lJfonthly; or, moral, like the Spectato,' or &OO1'ls, thoso silky cUl'h. ; 'J'hO&O Inu&:hlng eyes that lorm liO light ~ Those i>omiDable thing. A yOUDg woman Mventeen or eigbteen years ot ago, In whose personal appearance -there was nothing remarkable, was led to \he piano, and theu and there ensued • _ue which beggars all description, and Which, had I n<>t since become familia. with tho like, would even now cause my every hair to t\88ume an upright position. The young person drummeu once or twice upon the keys and tho com "any reiapsed Into .11ence; then .. sudden change eft me over her; she seemed to gasp for breath; she caught opasmodically wllh both hands at the lnatrument, opened her mouth to IIlI utmOSI capaCity, and suddenly jerk Ing her head backward aDd to ons side gave utterance to a successiona of scream. ot such an unearthly char aetor tbat it brought me to my teet ... d senl the blood back to my heart with COnvulsivo force. I would have apruDdlr f~rward to hor .... Istanee but ""'" .talDed by B lien eman Who sat · beeld tl to the condItIon of e me. The remainder of the company had not noticed me but they appeared totally Indift'er: ent as tb young lady who was apparently su;' ~~~g such horrible agony, Hereo: beh~~~~ h~ now become frightfUL k, grew pale a~~ 'ifue,::,~~ f Udly ; she she Would lean forwarl o~~~she~Y:' r [ 1 [ • e t 1 s I 1 r e a 'f a n it e ~ I . ~ ~ ~ ~ (I atrumcnt, upon which her bands were nervously working; anQll she would straighten herself backward, and again all the room would be filled by t hose terrible shrieks and cries. But I wish not to prolong the Bcone. Tho aflair ended, at,1ength, and as the company dispersed the friend who had provented me from displaying my ignoranco In public, explained matters to me. You may perhaps imag~ne what IDY feeling must have l)een as soon as r was mnde to com prehend the situation of aft'airs: I w ent home and reUred to my couch, 'but the remembrance of the scene at t·he party haunted my slumbers for many succeeding nights. And ever, as I think upon the circumstances of Ihat memorable eveninll'. and of the many other· like scenes I have wit nessed, I feel to exclaim, In the words of that illustrious poel, Milton H. Chaucer: " With })lcrumre I Cl\n h ORr the hooting or mldulght owlets through tho gloom; ., With pat.louco I bl\vo lhcnrd dis puting ~'ltll fourteen womon III Ollf) room; 'VUh cnlmneli8 I call bear th~ bawltng or chlldrOlll11 the nUrlJerv; Aud to dlatnrb m e , cnterwnullng Moot horrible indeed must. be I 1'\'0 s tood where OOUIlOU loud d id rMUe, Whore 8ho119 did burai. und bullets hilts: I've b oo'l'd norco n orco elemollt..nl bnttie , 'Xhe roBd and Tush ot herds ot cattle, nut. navol hoor I auaht Hke this! WUhJoy. I'd 118t. the dllmal cal1mg Of lle rce wo lv" b 0 1\i>!Jns In the wood , Dut to lUy yery lM)ul RppalUo& Arc 80unds like l.he3e-tbey freeze the . blood !" ntmGLABY. On the night oHhe 21st ins!. a room occupied by peaceful, law-abiding citIzens was broken Into by burglars. It is supposed that they were in search of plunder. Their noise arous ed thc occupanls of the room, who at tacked Ihe villains with such right good will that they were soon forced to flee. They ~ushed for the door, stumLU0II' over -,ables, chalre, etc., bnt at length succeeded In gettIng away. No property was missed, bnt upon exambaatloD after _their depar ture It was found that In their vlolenl ell'orts to escape the burglars had sha ken from their person mllUonBof ver min which now literally covered the floor of the room. It Is to be hoped Ihal In such" com munltyas ours such flagrant outraIres agalnsl the peace ot society will not go unwhlppod o(jusllee.. X. HITOHCOCK Ilvesln Lansln!:; deals in stationery, books, &c., &c., which he sells orf"l cheap, He ill withal" very obliging gentleman, and we reo commend him to students and others who wish anything in his line. • Tn>: State . Board of Agriculture held a meeting at. the College, on the the 27th ult. 71556 I' 'l'AllLE E'l'IClUE'l''l'E. tlHY CAil.~ JEUNl:. f~~ol.· C-n.CL1> . ~"'~.'(''''. It is customary now, in th~ higher circles 01 society, to use big language at tho table. /::lee to it thell that you do uot fail In this particular. Much depends upon your language. Use the biggest \~ords you can find, for if thoy do not express YOllr Illeaning, nobody else will know the difference. It may seem funny and foolish to talk in thIs manner it you have never t"lked so heretofore, but you w1l1 B09n get nsed to it, ami besides It i. fashionable. When at the tablo never use such an old fashioned expression as " pass the bread. please j" but say," cause the staff of life to have a motioll hitherward." Instead of saying, "Waiter!, alloth~ er cup or tea," Bay" menial attend .. ant, convey hither an additional measure of the infusioll of YOUDg Hyson." If in lleed of l\ glass of water, say, " precipitate Into the vitreous vessel a quantity of the pr.otoxide of hydro gen." If, unfortunately, you hav~ drop ped your knife, use language like the following: "My cutting Instrument being uusupported, gravitation, caus ed it.to d .. cend." If you talk of other subjects, still preserve the fllShlonable table-ulk. If yOU inquire artcr the health of your friend's family, do It in this wise: "Whal Is the hygienic condi tion of your conjugal partner ami youthful offspring?" And in speaklng'on tbe weather: "The meleorlogical phenomena of tbe present hebdomadal period are ex ceedingly propitious for the ';'pid development of vcgetatIon." After tWs style you must learD to lalk at table If YOII have t"o l""'lt de sire to enter the upper (?) circle. - - --- - LEC'l'tlU. A lecture will be given before the Agricultural College Lyceum, on Fri day evening, June 6th, by tbe Rev. John Patchen, of Okemos. Mr. Patchen's lalents as a lecturer being well known, a rich treat Is ex pected. All are Invited to attend and share It. - ---.---- BOCIAL.-The social all'air at the Female Seminary, last Friday even Ing, was of a character well calculated to Inspire pleasure and .aUslaction In the hearts of those in attendance. M an expression of our approbation of the entelt.llnment, we vote our thanks. "Own multis aliis." APPLES. apples is a frut" that grous onto tha Is "ousually about as bIg , trees. as a hole Into the sIde of a barrel, tho Iha Is sumUmes bIager and sumtImes tha is littler. the tree that till> grow onto Is orna mental as well nsyouseful. the little Burds cum and lite onto the limbs and worbuU forth their songs to their creator and other folks In mogt huti· ful stralnsas. apples dos fiurst rato in sum places hut tha dont henr. tha dont hang onto the tree till tha ripens, becos tha likes to ripen in the genial climate of a trunk or hn mow. apples nint thot mutch of by the moral folks becos tha seduced Mother eve, and they have seduceel lots of smal boys since. apples Is youse!"ul for lots of things. tI", Is good to ete and Ihe seeds Is very youseful to bring foks to parties. ces by the ma purson can tcl who he liks beat. tha Is sumtimes ground up and squeezed before tha Is et. Good templars dont ete um In thIs wa, but it ant" so that tha wont ete a chIcken that has roostcd onto a SGur apple Tree. thIs Is A composIshun by a senyur. The Monthly Exercises of the Senior Class. '.rho Faculty have recently (I\Uen into tho practIce of permitting the Seniors to indulge In the p)lerlle pas· time of origninnl declamations once l\ mont\!. Last Wednesday a pro· gramme of such exercIses was filled by a division of this class. No.1 as· cended the rostrum, wrInkled his vest in an excruciating manner by way of obeIsance, when he appeared ready for action. He proceeded first to dis· cu". In general the state of society, and then dropped clown to a regular cussln' of it In detail. Men were de· graded for weariu" plug·hats and au athemas against women who adorned themselves with babillments of mod ern cut, were uttered without l'e serve. In connection with the speak· er's views, a man taking such a crea ture as the sole partner of his joys Rnd 80rrO\v8, evinces moral degener cy, intellectual decay and corporeal rot. We hope when No.1 bolVs to Hymen, it will be with a full blown sbaker, fully bebanneHed and beblig ged. No.2 deviated somewhat fiOlIl hIs usual bent. Although he naturally appears melancholy and gIven to the contemplation of serious subjects, we know of many racy squibs that have emanated from his quill. He seemed to regard New England as a bl!)" sub· ject for the display of oratorical pow er, but his solemn tones, with our drOWSiness, suggested t.he Idea of funeral solemnities, and we roused up alld expecting to see the corpse brought in. Undoubtedly he had been reading 1l Pensaroso and Bax ter's Saints' Everlasting Rest. 'Ve were particularly pleased with the mental evolutions of No.8, whoso physical structure, enst In a liliputIan mould, made his abilIty all the more apparent. He was "multum in par va." He spoke of newspapers, nnd we opine his fore·knowledge of the BuMI. macle his subject much moro attractive, inasmuch 88 the appear anco of the Bubble would occasion Buch an expansion in the interests of tho literary world. The discourse of No.4 was exceedingly dry for such a wot subject. In explaining the phe· nomena of the Gulf Stream, hIs tones were too melodious. It Is our broth· erly advIce that he provide himself with 1\ mallet and an old pair of pants, retire to Borne secluded spot, and have a mock auction, for the benefit of his voice. The hietorienl discussion No. last, places Heredotus and Thucydides In unnotlclble InSig nIficance. The nonchalence with which he rallied his subst.ntial form ' up bofore the audience, was Indeed surprisIng. But he, In common with 1Il",t the others, fnHed In givIng a due amount of gesticulory expression to thele well written oratIon~. Ea~h stood up there Ilko a protuberanco on the epidermis of a prostrated ar borenl structure. These exercises were enlivened with Instrumental mu,ic by the College Band, which Is best criticised hy quotIng from the remarks of ·one of the small boys of ihe College, who inquired if it wa.. usuol to play tho Doxology on such occasIons. A-- . 'rilE fiend in human form who perpetrated the following, deserves to be held up to the unIversal execration of mankind. EDITOR. THE DAWN' OF DAY. 'fhe shades ot night. GTC vanishod, The east. 18 Oa.ming roo, J~lke J . 8 . 8.'8 whiskers. (}r Ettu DrutO'B heM. 'fho milky wuo t.hnt. girts t.he tlky, Which ever I!iCcms to mo Like t.h' mousto.che of F. P. D., I Gnn now no IODier eee. And liMning fair o'er b111 nnd v!\le, Tho ttlOrnlng star "ppoo.red, 1~0