Wayouts are just that... p. 12 . 4 -- October 1989 . ·WHAT'S UP: BACK IN A fLASH, KICKING ASS! The REAL best of Lash Is here/ ••• p. 7 G That rotten kid Is back ••• p. 7 9 Dig with Big Baby... p. 9 8 Classifieds ••• 8 Out and about. •• G · Entertainment .•• p.8 p.10 p.12 Volume I . Number2 MSU's aftemative - and truly independent . voice ·Abortion debate divides state · by M.L. ELRICK uR·I Executive Editor : It's a dedslon no woman .wants to 1ace, yet thousands do each year. A decision on an Issue so sensi tive two highly-charged and polarized s~es have done battle In the courts, the streets, and In the media. Some say the declsk>n belongs to the woman. Others say there should be no declslon and, oonsequently, no abortion. Abortion IS h&rdly a new Issue, but It is one that was hotly contested for years betore the Supreme Court's landmark declsk>n In Roe vs. Wu. Even the terms generally U&ed to desalbethecombatants-and- abortion, pro-life- are mmeated. · We would have no problem being named anti-abortiOn Hour opponents would be prc>-abortlon, • said Barbara Listing, Michigan Right To Life president. Listing spoke to the uR-1 on the heels of a pro-choice rally In Lansing that drew thousands to the capitol lawn more than a week ago. The beautiful Weather, Dixieland music and giant American flag backdrop belled the seriousne&& of what was the first post-Webster vs. Reproductive Services abortion rally In Michigan. Pro-Choice forces fired the ftrst salvo In what promises to be a bitter fight In the Legislature- and In the voting booths In November 1990. We are drawn here by a compel- llngandcommoncau&8-topre- serve freedom of cho6ce tor the women of our state,· said former Michigan First-I.my Helen MHliken, co-chair of the Citizens tor-Personal Freedom. We are here to say to our legislators: We cannot, we wiU not accept a step back to the days wt*1 Will this effort cost some leglsla- tors their jobs? "I think that's up to the voter. (However), I think most voters don't vote on one Issue; Listing said. The anticipated ouster of some elected officals "depends on the other Issues Involved In the campaign; she added. Milliken minced no words, telling a cheering crowd to -Wage war on lawmakersattemJ)tlng to deny women theirConstltUtlon8l rights.· That Is where the anti-abortion and pro-life factions differentiate themselves-rights. The Right-to-Life movement holds that life begins at conception and that their opponents have sought to dehumanize the fetus In an attempt to make abortion acceptable, thereby taking rights from a unborn person. Pro-choicers sett the fetus Is not a person until months Into a pregnancy, and that a woman should have the right to terminate a pregnancy I f she · sees flt. .Between the two sides, there can be no middle ground. And some say that may cause voters to base their ballot on a candidate's abortion 1.-----------------=====;;;;;;;;;;;;;.;;.;, posklon. Twe el ..___... ,, .......... •,... i:Mice rallJ ill Lauiq. .a-llMAllom GARRllON · women died from self-Induced and unsanitary ~Ion. We wll not to18rate government Intrusion Into our Right-to-Life survey numbers givlna private live&.• majority In this Important swing state. Listing...:.. citing Detroit News and However, with the exception of some close races, many observers said they didn't believe a candidate's view on abortion could cost them their seat. them a majority-said pro-life legislators are planning to push a five- bill, aborllon~estrictlve package, through the Legislature. But Hice almost everything sur- rounding Michigan's abortion debate, that Is yet to be· seen. Pro-choice forces are pushing legislators to leave Michigan a · "Choice• state, claiming to have a: ' .' 2 •Reporter-Intelligencer . · , 4 October, 1989 NEWS, OPINION, ENTERTAINMENT THE uR-1 AN ABORTION ALTERNATIVE SERVICE ~ MOOD !lfl:SIC TO SUIT ANY TIME OF DAY' WE CARE ... and we are here to help! We need your help at SHARED PREGNANCY, a completely private non-sec tarian group of volunteer men and women from all walks of life, that serves those experi encing a crisis concerning pregnancy contact: 501 N. Walnut , Lansing, Ml . 48933 484-1882 Remember: WE CARE! • Periodic computerized fitness evaluations • Incentive prizes for aerobic point achievement • Personalized matched exercise partners •Specialized clinics • Organized club activities •Regular motivation and support INTERESTED? ~ EXERSTART l1@CP Dov@ @Oonlli> If so, the Exerstart For life Club may be just what you have been waiting for! OLIN HEALTH CENTER MICHIGAN STATE UNIVERSITY SPRESSO ROY ALE CAFFE . 226 ABBOT ROAD 'E'lt BEGGAR"S ~" c"NTU. MIDN!GIIT BLOODY MARY MORNING 'LOO off until 2p.m.,., -·---('ij· ,,-;.::-\ l:- SAT: -- - --------- SUN: All YOU CAN EAT SPAGHETTI 3-8p.m. oX' _....-::; Your partner in printing: • Announcements •Booklets •Brochures • Business Cards • Carbonless Forms • Custom Color Ink • FAX Service • Letterhead •Mailers •Menus • Newsletters • Office Forms · • Pick-up and Delivery •Stapling • Typesetting ST LANSING 514 MICHIGAN AVE. 1/2 MILE EAST OF FRANDOR PHONE 332111 7171 FAX 332-5729 ©1989 ASPC, inc. the University Reporter-Intelligencer Page Three The Second Front Pa e - Transfer students feel tuition Increase crunch by SHANNON DRAYSON u R-1 Connpondenl attend two-year schools first because of financial reasons. Combined with the prices MSU The average community college charges tor out-of-state students, probably has an enrollment as big as many are forced to take on several one of MSU's dormitories. job&, apply tor loans and obtain ftnancialaid. i Craig Walsh, a sophomore But leaving behind the community college can be disorienting In more ways than one. Students transferring majoring In flnanoa, said he was to MSU not only leave behind ooi:y campuses and fndivlduallzed Inst rue- tlon, they gain the added bill that Is the before registration, which forced him to take out an additional loan and find result of this year's tuition lnaease. startled by the Increase. The unlver- sly notified him only three weeks But transfer students still are choo&- a job. Ing to attend MSU despite the dizzying rate of rising tuition. MSU transfer students are scrambling to find a way to make ends meet. Meredith Kuntzsch, a senior In advertising who transferred to MSU last year, was sympathetic. 1 have two jobs and I still barely This year's 7 .9 percent hike hit make ends meet,· Kuntzsch said. transfer students especially hard. Many transfer students elected to She does not qualify for financial aid and said she feels helpless. "The nation's top priority Is HAIR A MESS? Let us help you out-Come to GARY'S CAMPUS HAIR SALON $9.00 uni-sex hair styling "A Cut Above Yet Priced Below" ...._....._ ..... .....,_, 351-6511 549 E. Grand River (next to Confection Connection) M-F 8am-7pm Sat 9am-2pm education, yet they are unwilling to help students like me,• she said. Richard Henson, MSU's associate director of admissions and scholar ships, said most transfer students still are choosing MSU despite the rising tuition costs. "For most, It Is education Interrupted or education delayed, but It normally Isn't education unobtained. • Other students, such as Sean Bredy, a James Madison junior, said he didn't mind the tuition increase. "It's just that when I pay the Increase, I want to see improvement.• Bredysald. Some views on abortion Ill President Bush (R): Opposed to abortion, except to save the mother's life or in cases of incest or rape. Ill Sen. Donald Riegle (D): Pro-choice. . Ill Sen. Carl Levm (D): Pro-choice. Bush Ill Rep. Bob Carr (D): Pro-choice. Ill Gov. Blanchard (D): Pro-choice. Ill State Sen. William Sederburg (R): Opposed to state funding of abortions, but believes women should have the right to choose. Ill State Rep. Lynn Jondahl (D): Pro-choice. BENNY'S PIZZA andDEU 1001 s. OnD.4 Rtnr 332-0534 - . . Nov.11,1- 2Roll ...... ..,.._......,, My order ------------ Pan Pizzo two email ...... c•-• +two lie- $6.97 wwwwwww ... - - . , Farah a Sons I 221 Ann St. 337-9632 the. BIG dri11k 25¢ off 46 oz. fountain Coke I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I e e ABORTION: The bottom line is clear \.~f;_ / t.t.'°' , QI _,._ ~ ~v,S "~ · ~ · V'i~~ " ~i , / J_ Le--r l'1 Y €14 g12. Yo THAW.*'0H11r Afl.€ yov /Al FP/l ~ It's up to the individu.al to decide Without a doubt, there can be few Issues or subjects as sensitive as abortion; there is no middle ground- you either believe It should be legal or should be outlawed. Some, like President George Bush, have sought to establish a moderate position by opposing abortion except In cases of Incest, rape, or danger to the mother's Hfe. However, the bottom line remains: Should women be allowed to have abortions? We strongly believe the question of whether or not to bear a d'tlld- for whatever reason, be It to abort a disabled fetus or an unwanted preg nancy- ls an Intensely personal decision. And we strongly believe that decision should be be left up to the Individual. There can be no debate on this: A woman's body Is her own and she alone may decide what happens to It. It is a simple personal freedom issue. End of argument. Questions regarding the beginning of life and viability of fetuses Is fine for theologians and scientists, yet It Is the woman who must bear the unwanted burden, no matter what unanswerable question has been "answered.· To believe abortion Is widely used as a means of birth control ls fantasy and a tool to dupe the Ignorant. While we have never experienced an abortion or the agony that must political hacks by out-of-toud't conser- accompany the episode, It Is hard to believe anyone would take such a vative presldents-theirdecislon decision lightly. And If so, certainly not does not shock us, but disgusts us. twice. Yet, as politics swirls and changes, woman will still face the same agonizing decision. We assert that the 1972 Supreme Yet some persist with the abor- tlon-as-birth-control and other paper- thin arguments for a ban on abortion. Unfortunately, the trend In this Some local offices mute on iaue An Informal uR-1 survey of East Lansing's representatives confirmed that abortion Is a delicate Issue many legislators fear may cost them their job. Some of the pols are keeping a tight rein on local offices when asked about their position. Court Roe decision was correct. decade has been to restrict abortion Women should be free to have rights, with many anxiously awaiting the outlawing of abortion. While we are disappointed, we are While President George Bush and abortions without restrictions Imposed Gov. James J. Blanchard have staked out their positions for all to see (Bush by the state. anti-abortion with exceptions and Blanchard pro-choice), others have been a little tess forthcoming. If It takes a Constitutional amend- Once again, the bottom line: Ifs a not surprised by the Supreme Court's ment to assure this right, so be It. decision In Webster vs. Reproductive Services which gave states the opportunity to place limitations on abortion. woman's choice- let her make It. 11 was believed politically expedi- ent-as Mr. Bush has shown with the reversal of his 1980 position on. abortion- to oppose or restrict a woman's right to an abortion. And by following the largely conservative high court's record- a court stacked with See related· graphi• C p. 3 ' • > > Of the elected officials represent- Ing the MSU community on a national and local level, two local offices could not or would not disclose their boss' stance and one other office was conoemed how the uR-1 would state its boss' case. The Lansing office of U.S. Sen. Don Riegle (0) and East Lansing office of U.S. Re • Bob Carr (0-East Lansing) wouldn't or couldn't tell the uR-1 where their boss stood on the abortion Issue. They Instead said they dealt with specific constituent concerns-which didn't lncludedlspensing lnfonnation on their boss's abortion position. to the Abortion Is definitely a concern. The Capitol office of state Sen. William Sederburg (A-East Lansing) did talk, but was cautious - point of suggesting the senator call a reporter to explain his position person ally- but did talk about his position. The offices of U.S. Sen. Carl Levin and state Rep. Lynn Jondahl ( Okemos) simply said their bosses were "pro-choice.• h Is a disservice to constituents to hide on the abortion Issue. We urge al candidates to inform their offices on their positions on aucial Issues. Without a doubt, abortion Is one suctt Issue. 4 October, 1989 Reporter-Intelligencer • 5 LETTERS: YOU CAN WRITE OUR STORIES TOO !~~ ~~t 'em, The University Reporter-Intelligencer is looking for motivated people for a want 'em variety of positions. If you are interested, or know of . - :::wehavealewconditions, The uR-1 encourages al of its points, letters to the editor or ~~==::n someone who might be, please con- :.':~~~== tact us.at: 351-4899 or at our offices ~":~~=:~i:.ica- at 142 Gunson. Anyone willing to . :u:i::~~;~truy work hard will not be turned away. ~17~.:'."rwisestimu- This may be the break you were springboard for intelligent, I 00 k1· n g f 0 r '· Please send letters typed and double-spaced (or on a macintosh disk) to our offices · - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - at 142 Gunson the Friday before publication. Letters may be edited for clarity and become property of the uR-1. They will not be returned. So get cracking. . I I I I · r•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••··~ I : ~~w ~~[Q)~~ : 1 I It's a neat-o reader response card! I I , . : So are we headed in the right tra.ck? : I Please let us know, send this card to our offices at 142 I I Gunson St. with·any criticisms, comments or suggestions I · I or other things you believe will enhance our ability to serve I ! I ! the MSU community. Remember, this is your paper, too. I I I I I I I I I I . I I I I I I I I I I I I I ·I I I I I I I I I I I I I I ~--··················································-~ · . · · 6 • Reporter-Intelligencer 4 October, 1989 Johnnie, oh, Johnnie, where is you gone? The wold al Cowlel Houu lelt Wed"8aly was •John la e.:k!• But where ls back? And, damn, am I ahead of myself already? Yep. : OK. So, how did this humbte undergrad (paying upperdlYtslon tuition rates) know DiBI was back? Simple, goofbell, I asked. Af. about 8:45 am., a colleague and I pulled up to the mansion and parked (In OIBl's spot, of course). I went to the entrance and rang the bell where' was met by a charming woman with a Bavarian aooent 11 Dr. DIBlagglo In?" I asked, knowing John likes to be called "doctor.· "No, he's not In right now: the kindly las& replied. (Thought he might want &Ome to send to relative&, whal with him being named geek of the week and all, don'tdlaknow~ I queried H he might still be In Asia. sautlnlzing the new MSU program he sautlnlzed last year. . Being a helpful MSU employee, she said; no, he was back. useflA. · But I Hice 0181, and I know he kwes this university. I know It's Important for him to hit the brick& and tout MSU and maintain Its high profile. I know he'd rather spend the night In Cowles Mansion with a glass of MSU-produced wine and a good, hol, plate of MSU cafeteria tood, than In the waln&CXJttlng of a ruined Europeatl Back home, I presumed. Nein, she said. Back In Washington. You know; of castle or In a strange hotel room. the D.C. variety: However, whal I just don't know is Since when was being "back• being In Washington, D.C.; home of not Sparty and the John Hannah Administration Building, but home of other folks with ceramic heads and the John's Travels: Pentagon? where he Is half the damn time! Perhap& my great friend UnivenW- D·summed It up best In the lead of one of his administration stories about "Here tOday, gone tomorrow: So, have a safe trip, John - and I guess It's back when you con- Undaunted, I asked where he was, as I wanted to bestow upon him . 1 O copies of the newestest and be&test campus newspaper. sider that our prez Is a rare c:Ommodlty don't forget to write. on campus. Almost as rare as a condom machine, and almost equally ·. ~Elrick I• Ex.cutiv• Ed/tot' of tlNt uR-1 Fillinl! cups just won't do for this lad the rantings of an~ellian-1nspired paranoid afraid of the government Intruding not only our homes and bedrooms, but now our exaetory systems as well. The question at hand Is not whether d~ are bad for you or . whether people who use drugs should work while they're tripping or whether drugs are just groovy as long as they're not on my block. government should have the povier to enact leglslatlon·allowlng businesses or other employers (Including the government) to test Its employees for drug use. , · . · · drunk, not wired, stoned or tripping, remember? pllshed without trampling on our Ninth Amendment rights. Perhaps the Bush Administration But was there a big clamor for could see Its way fit to Invest some breathalyzertests to be administered money Into our decrepit educational to all ship captains after the spoiling of syst~ rather than buying little plastic vials. And maybe the minimum wage Prince William Sound? Or afterthe spil this summer In Narragansett Bay could be reduced so more people will engage In "honesr labor rather than off of the Rhode Island coast? · taking to the streets to make $2,000 a day ~lling crack. only country bedeviled by drugs? And since when Is America the It's not a proposition for the legalization of aH drugs, or for workers to endanger lives by building cars people In Germany and Britain and the Soviet Union and even Japan did them, too. If they don't, will someone · when they think they're feeding please tell me how Sid Vicious died? Or why even a nice boy Jike Paul McCartney admitted once to doing LSD? elephants. . stay within Its jurisdiction and not Interfere with Individual privacy. It's a call for the government to The question Is whether or not the Pardon me If I'm wrong, but I thought A recent quote from Herbert Kleber an aide to the federal drug czar, William Bennett, Illustrate& the direction In which our country Is heading. Kleber was defending a proposal to test workers for drugs. 1f Americans are to remain competitive with our foreign competl- · tlon, we can't afford a workplace that · prove thal Its Interest to protect the Is stoned,· Kleber said. · We need to ask ourselves, as a country, where do we draw the line between legitimate governmental . Intrusion and protection of Individual privacy? Ifs a fine line, and a slippery one at that. But the government must was so right. ~ Go piss up a rope, Herb. Sure, Herb. We all.agree thal people should not assemble cars or fly planes or navigate giant supertankers while they're on the peak of a peyote trip. But H they like to pop a pill rather than sip a Bud after work, so be It. It's their buslness,~and It's hypocritical to people outweighs the Interests of the people to be left alone. And they have not done thal. The Bushmen haven't even tried to cover their Invasion of our minds and bodies - be• a woman's right to decide whether or not to have an abortion, or anyone's right to decide . whether or not to do drugs or submit · differentiate between after-work to a urinalysis test. martinis and after-work lines -- It's all bad tor your health and It's all drug use. 11Ja ElpCon Yaktez cantaJn was The drive to remove drugs from the workplace -which I assume would require some sort of drug- testing requirement Can be accom- Gee-k of the Week I'd like to find the political science professor who told me that Democrats like big government and Republicans like small, unobtrusive governments. And pat him on the back, becau&e he The almighty dollar rules, and If companies with budgets as big as Third Wortd GNPs want something, you'd better believe they're going to get It. So much for the changes we really need. I wouldn't hold your breath for those. Or anything else, for that matter. Most of all, you'd better not hold It In. Someone might be around the carrier waiting for a sample. _Stearns I• managing ~itOI' fOI' th• uR-1. "WhemWK thMe's a sight to be s9911, alumni to be milked, exotic MSU program to b9 visited, or trip to be taksn, /'H be there, Ma.• -FormerUConnPr ......... JohnDIBlagglo Song to be sung to the tune of •Message In a Bottle•: •A year has past since I smoked that joint; I should have been cautJous right ftom the start. Ssems I thought only I would kncNI; Now I'm standing In this bath- room, pesing In a cup; .. I'm being tested for IUlcit drugs, I'm being tested for Ill/ell drugs. I hope It's not In my I hope it's not In my system any more, bladder any more, yeah, yeah. (big guitar solo) My obviously deficient songwriting skills aside, these lyrics are more than Sorry, Zaa Zsa baby. We'd kill to have the chance to slap you, but It appears that prlvlleg• has been reserved for a gorgeous Beverly Hiiia police officer. Too Bad. You should have been walloped years ago for you rterrlble acting or a dozen other ruaona. It waa long overdue, assuming, of courM, that you were socked. . . . . . 4 . . . . , . . ,. #-,# #",.. ,> # # • • , ) ,.. I ,. , # ' ' f .> • ._ • • .J> • I ~ I ,, .J • , ' · . ,.. # Reporter- lntellligencer • 7 ,,, - 1hlfll&.. , get It now1· he yelps. -You just desatbed What the prof In my econ class last year called •supply-side economics,· right? The way he _ explained It, when Reagan rammed through those whopping tax cuts In the ear1y 80s and ran up the deficit, he justified 'em the same way your pal Bush's, Is doing now, Isn't he?" -"Our prof had us reed an article In the AllantJc Monthly where his budget director -a guy named David Stockman-admitted that Readan wanted to reward his rich friends who'd put him In the White House by glvng them a big tax cuts. Reagan needed a way to cover up the obvious giveaway ;so Deaver or ~came up with~ high- sounding name for It: 'supply-side economics,' as If they'd discovered a new economic theory. Bush called it 'voodvoo economics' In those days• 1..M's see how much you remember from that class about t~ rest of it; I says, the teacher coming out of me even though I'm retired. "How did they answer the question why the deficit wouldn't go up when they cut those taxes?" ·1 do rememt>et-1· he says. "They claimed when all the tax savings were Invested the way they said they would, there'd be such an Increase in eco nomic activity, tax revenues'd sky- rocket and thh govemment'd end up with a surplus Instead of a deficit I .. Course it didn't work out that way; he say5. "When Reagan left the White House, the deficit was more than twice what It'd been when he started. We never got those new factories, ~her. •And now,· he condudes disgust edly, "your pal Bush Is selling the country the same· old snake oil Regan peddled when he was.presldenu· . jacket George was wearing during Saturday's MSU-Miami thriller? Mrs. Pet1es shouldn't let him leave the house without checking his gym bag . next week. Gosh, lookln' spiffy, bruddert 4 October, 1989 Lam Larrowe Lash is through with voodoo doo-doo Whatever happened to voodoo economics? . I'm out at the supermarket, gettln' mighty Impatient as I maneuver my c:mt up to the checkout. h's piled way up . . h goodies; my delmonlcos, BM 9" C8Yis and South African lobster tals on top. Ordlnmty, now !hit the 'U"s retired me I doni mind waiting. but this time I doni want the frozen stuff to thaw out before I get It home. I look up to the front of the line to see what's the hold- up, and I see this skinny kid up there fumbl.ln' with his food stamps. Wh&rs takln' him so long, I wonder. All he's got In his cart Is a measly beg of economic statesmanship at Its best. of generic rice, a couple loaves of day-old breed, some Navy beans. I'm just abOut to yell at him to get a move · goes Into effect, Ike the Rolls does on when he piunlcs down his food stamps on the counter, straightens up OK"r You watch, sonny. The economy's · gonna surge ahem when that tax cut when I give It a shot of high-test gas, - . and looks around, spots me a the end · , don't get It,· he says. ,f they give America's wealthiest tam Illes a of the line. $25,000 tax cut, how's that going to "Hey, Lashr he chirps. "When we get through here, you got time for just one . help the economy? People like that quick question?- "How come you got food stamps7" I asks him when I get out ot hte perking lot-where he's waiting for me. •you don't know what It's like being a student these days, lssh~· he com- plains, -You being a fat cat, puAlng down your pension, driving your Rolls there and all. First, they cut backoon financial aids for we students, and now the 'U"s raised tuition on us again. The only way I can stay In school ls cut back on my food budget. already spend as much as they want to on their ·houses, cars clothes, trips they take. "Food, too,• he adds, glancing down hungrily at my delmonkx>s and lobster tails In the cart. "They'll just put the money they have left over after the tax In the bank. There's no way they'll be able to spend It.· -You should've llstened to the Presl- dent,· 1 scowls. "Here's how he explained the benefits of his tax cut: •:A lower capital gains tax rate will reduce the coat of capital arid create 'What I want total< to you about, though,• he goes on, "Is what do you Incentives for Investment n the long- . term prodUdlve capacity of American think abOut Congress aJtttng the capital .gains tax. Isn't It outrageousr . _ Industry.'• "Negative: I tells him. 1t's an example 1 still don't get 1t: he scowls. That's just a lot of words. Could you put It In simple terms for me"r "OK.· 1 says. 1f you're loaded and the government Gl'15 your taxes and lets you keep most of your profit when you sell your stock or a pleoe of real estate you've owned for awhile, you're gonna do It, right? So they cut your taxes, OK, you Invest your tax savings In a new factory or new machine, right? The new factory produces goods that add to the supPly of the proouct, the price. comes down. The new factory pro vides employment, and the machine your money bought Is more efficient, cost-efficient. 9The way President Bush puts It, In no time with CX>Sts of procUdion and prices coming doen all over place, weil be getting back too the Japanese and the Germans took away from us when the Democrats was runnin' That rotten little kid is back ... "crusade forthe lktle peop1e· against neutrality after one side of the Issue - the handsome but unruly Beverty Hlls (and a potential source for future police force. . lfs hard to Imagine when the airlines refused to let her take a pet abo8ld (~last crusade) they weren't You might say whaley. referlng to the dragon lady herself stories) footed the blll for this excur- sion. Seems more than a bit fishy to us. Speaking of newsmakers-we're- sick-of, It's goOd to see Blllk• Ezor filally tound a place he won't get In any trouble-the acoomodatlng and recently remodeled EL.PO pokey. Inexpensive and clo6e to the watering holes that helped bring little Bj.akey to his present pilght. Ar.d why Is It that plumbers, electricians, et ceteraa never wear underwear? Is that some kind of union thing? Just where can we get one of _ those belts that just lets the top quarter of the pale moon rise? Don't you hate the shorting of We hate to take a shot at good ole president to "Prexy"' In newspaper . Blaka, but It seems the only thing he headlines? can't outrun Is the law. Good thing, too. · Hope to see him and his humon- To certain of those who made the uR-1 baptismal party last week and left '*Y· mut:Ue-lltNllll. •·• anotl»I' ...- Md ti,,,. to ,.i rt.. adlMlllln ehoD., ,,,. ,_,,.making,,. tlowllllJ with. t.wtnMhd . . . wotldju.t a I,,,,. mo;....,....., __ This week the Provocateur cannot . help but start with the beautiful, witty, entertaining first lmiy of Hootervllle (speaking of which, she used to be Mss Hungary and they doni give that to no gals from Pancalcevllle) ••• Of course, we refer to Zaa Zaa (need I say Ga-more?). Rag of the week, hands down. The Provoc Is tired of her wasting the taxpayers money, time and cluttering up the court dockal with her gous ego back at Dooley's harrasslng a christening check: would Mr. Bill, the womenfolk and generally annoying John Wayne, Sir Lany Oliver and the already delicate cllentelle. someone riamed Ms. Seka please call us so we can get you to sign those That brings us to another kind of generous checks you left! clentelle; dlentelle of a lobbying sort. Enter client John Secor, editor-In- And on keeping checks: as the chief of Th• State Nt1ws (uh-oh, he's 54-8 District Judge race heats up, It going to think this Is one of those personal attacks they were afraid oft). candidates have to say to students - such as being concerned about their Wiii be Interesting to hear what the Seems Big J went on an ex- penses-pald trip to Israel this summer, rights and pertinent Issues -and courtesy of the Jewish Antl-Oefama- tlon Laague. Now he's writing about problems In the Middle East. Quite a globetrotter and then contrast that with their adherence to the overbearing~ alcohol and noise ordinances. Hey, Jordle, hey, Hao& - go easy superrrian ••• able to leap borders and .ethics In a single bound. While we realize first~ ·experience Is helpful when grappling with l&Sues. we have to question .rs . on us, babe&. Back to babes for a minute. Just what w8s that horrible tan FOR A LIMITED TNE ONLY, t. uR-1 wi1 be oftlring daMiHda frM of clwgel Nlat a aotll IMftain, W.. W. will accept da•il•dl ft many~. incblng: penlOl'lllls. wtlds, !mt and r.:u... ..._ (eought or offlred), roomm .... or hauling. M. mu.t be dlliv•ed ID fHt uR-1 olficM at U2 cale\s. Yo. Lem. guess what? You stiri<. And you're going to get a punch n 1he nose. lhalks. Va - for the at. of COUf'le. You're a dol but you alreodv knew that. you conceited bitch. Milhai: To the brother I never hod. rm really going to ml• you. Treaevgene Yo. MOOlh; don't stat any was without us. Mike · No. redly, hove a 9CJfe trp and come back 900r'I. D-lt hos been a long fime and I hove gown qlite a bit. but I om even cuter than before. h for lunch If I hove tine . l'U consider It. Tell Tiff to look out. Mattie. Congratulations, 1989 pledges! Kristen Abler DebbieAnglin KriatinAyotte Anne Benisek Kimbezly Berger Heather Bolton JuliBorg . 1..eslie-AnneBrower Barbara Oieaney Eli7.abeth Chriaco Darcy Colby Karen Davis Hadley-Anne Dickinson &inEbety JillFrutig LindaOeodelmm Holly Gold Suzy Oorespe Jodi Green Jennifec H8Dlell Pam Hatfield KatieHamingec Stephanie Hussey Beth Johnston Jill Kapolka Andrea Kline Andrea:Kubasiewicz Usa Kusluski U..Lande Nic:oleLulla · Jennifer Mc:Cmron CberiMedeodorp AngieMepla KrillaMnnc:trior Jennifer Rinke s...b.RoWea CberylSaul Terri Schafer TnciShehon Jami Sheperd KrilliSpme CbristineSpems Andy Spinpteen Barb Stem 'Jr.ceyTreiber Maria Valera Tracy Walla Kriltin Wolf Kimberly Wood anieZimmerman BENNY'S PIZZA a DB.I offers a geat deal for you pizza !Own. Cal 332-0534 today. See OU' SHARED PREGNANCY CRISIS CENTER cfterlaborllcn ~-"**forttlOle to cal UI at 482-1882. See OU' ad eltewhwere In 1he u-RI. !ID M w @[Ji} @@l a [Ji} ~® ® [Q) a© lk< UlhJ @U @Ulh1® tr [p)lfil[p)®lf o oo ~ @@ [Q) a © [k{ ®UM © [k{ \YAYl a UlhJ UlhJ @U 01' ~ lf@[f@J W>a U1lU@ooo DON'T BE A·DICK ellewhere In 1he uR-1. DAVIDZUMBERG Is an eperi enced hdrltyllt ready to off• you penond atten11on. Calta David at 337-1114. See his ad ellewhere In the uR-1. TOP DOG IS THE PLACE fa fr nochol on orders over $6 accompaHd by OU' COl.POl'l located elle>#here In the uR-1. ESPRESSO ROY ALE CAFFE · feahles fine cappucc:lno. • cellent MNice and~ urondngl. 226Abbot Rd. See OU' ad elletNhere In theuA-1. GRAB A STAI.LION BURGER with friet ta onv S2. 99 fNfllV 5'.ndavatthe Ladhark. Fa a IChec:Ue of tNs 'N'eek's • iterlair rnent. see cu ad eiw.tlere In the uR-1. GARY'S CAMPUS HAIRSAl.ON is a cut above. yet priced below. Located at 549 E. Grand Riv.. See OU' ad ~ wow ... IT'S A l BEAUTY.' .. ~,._- VEA"', AND T~ERE'.5 LOTS·· OF ROOM ... HEY, WOULDN'T . IT BE NEAT TO SPEND TME NIGMT OUT 1-tERE? YGAN! LET'S GO ASK MV MOM! MIDDLE EASTERN DELI AND GROCER Pita Dread. Fresh Daily Eor In Or Take Our KlllllE£ CMIOMXROW G11APC 1.£4 VES TAOOUU Hours - 91D 9 Monday Thru Friday 9 ID 6 Salurday 12 1D 6 SUnday Un~ Sponon Shopping Cenrer fle.xr To Domino's l'lzza> FAlAFEl HliMOu5 WlANE SPINACH PIE MEAT PIE 04KLAV4 PISTACHIO N11!S OLIVES SPICES CHEE5E elebrallng our 1st run week of bring Ing ISt Lansing the nnest In alternative music, rap, Imports, new age, IL dance entertainment LIVE DJs EVERYDAY 351-2HOT A FEW WEEKS LATER, IN'SAM SA5LOSKV'S YARD .. , ALMOST DONE ... LET'S GET TMl5 LAST BOARD ... MI, MOM ... CAN TONV AND I SPENP TME N IGMT OUT IN OUR NEW FORT? TONV'S MOM SAY'S IT'S O.K. ~--J "41, MOM ... CAN I STAV OVER AT SAM'S iONIGMT? MIS MOM SAV'S IT'S o.r-<. YEAH.' OU I A ND--iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiifr=~1~Q:==i A.§.Q.!J.I.;. F.ad1 week, tho uR.-1 will feature a secticm c:alled 0..tAM Abolll In it you will find liltinp oflocalmWtainmeathappminp ranging from bmds playing •local nigbtduhl to plays on md off cmnpm. We allo will includocancertupdet• IDr themes ----inBlltl.-ina..Ann Arbor a metro Detroit. Considering our relatively "'unhip"ways,ple111econtact• aboutotherb1ppeDingpbal. evmts, etc.. 10 that we may iDcludo them in this section. ..... reed: This is bMic:ally free adv~IO send 111 IOIDO pnlA pd cu. St. Andrew's Hall, Detroit: Oct. 6, Friday: Adrian Belew Nectarine Ballroom, Ann Arbor: Oct. 9, Monday: Bob Mould (Former lam singer of Husker Ou). lllohlganThMlre,AnnArbor: Oct. 5, Thuraday: Bobcal Goldthwait The P.S.C.,AulUn Hiia: Oct. 8, Friday: Jethro Tuff 1111 Auditorium, Ann Arbor: Oct. 11, Wednesday: Jethro Tull 208 Balley St., East l.Malng: Oct. 6, Friday: Laughing Hyenas and Just Say No Reach an alternative market by using an alternative paper. Advertise the uR-1 in or write us: 142 Gunson St. Eat Lansing, MI 48823 of 10 readers say: "I wouldn't line the bottom of my lizard's cage with that other paper!" Keep your lizard happy, ·read the u R--1 'DBM from p. 12 Why not met some spice to the special programming wllh a show like the one featured In "Talk Radio?' Some good old-fashioned tug 'n puU would be a thrill to lilten to. And doni UH the FCC. a rock to hide under. A property produced tormal woni offend anyone. And H thal thought Is too rmilcal for you, how about. world-beat . show? Any pseuddamjfieaj can ten you that some of the world's coolaat music Is .DQl being programmed Into a Syndavler. Artis18 like Baaba Maal and Fela Kuti blow away that Orm Haza chick. You could UM this show to be truly cutting-«tge and play Zwkl Mu, th8l'l't08tlmereaingband1w seen In a long time. WD8M UMS a romtlon of mUlic thal Is similar to thal of.~ (Tep Forty) ndo station. A good Idea, but-It only tak8s one mlndlesa jock to meas things up. Eilher Its as obYiou& as playing thralh (trash?) after Phnlnc. or as stupid as playing Bauhal.m, Tones on Tail and Peter Murphy all In the .... hour. Do your homewori(, kiis, doni st,st,stuner. While we're talking about the bend(s). there are other aongs done besides "Ball of Confusion• and "Ziggy Starduaty. ·Lera not forget that Jane's Addiction only has one song, right la.Ha? While we're talking about the alrstaff. plaearnee, If you have nothing better to say .. .then shut the ha upt rd rather hear dead air than conatant berll«aboutsomebody's aprtng break. roommate's girtfriend, etc,_ And doni step on (talk over) lyrtcl of aonga. The other day tn&taad of Joey Ramone, I hENud Kevin C. Ramone. There a8ams to be a lot of music that Is truly original and alternative missing from the repertoire. Next time someone gets ready to put on a Smiths record, how about Bongwater, Spacemen 3 or The Residents instead? If you're worried about losing your geek listeners, fear not. They seem to have mo.the transition from Kool & the Ging to Oepeche Mode, they'H survive this. Then we'll have the management that doeani seem to want to graduate and get out Into the real world. This Is for them, but the station Is sup h posed to be pqrassive, riot regres sive. There are 8118881 three people In manrgement positions who have beer1 al similar pos18 tor more than three years. Go get jobs. guys, stop playing with ourtoys. Let's get some fresh meat In there. So as not to sound like a nit-picky bastard (thought I am), let me com mend the news and sports depart ments. Great job people. You're probably the only redeeming constant at the station. Listen up, WDBM, you have a hell of a lot of potential, you don't have to wony about nasty old ratings, Irate owners or penny-pinching advertisers. But you still have ambitions to com pete In a market as cheezy as Lan sing. Make them play your game, doni play theirs. C'mon, show some balls. If you're gonna assault us, give us something we haveni already haud. Liberate the People! 4 October, 1989 . · · Reporte.r-lntelligencer • 11 Tena Southsid9 Although the group Tena has a name and a sound which could've come straight from the Lone Star State, the band actually halls from Scotland. Their name simply reflects one of the band's primary Influences: Ry Cooder's . soundtrack for the film Paris, T BXBS. On their first album, ce Southalde, the spotlight definitely is centered on this quartet's two principal members, vovalist Shauleen Spit•rl and guitarist Ally llcErlaine, and they definitely deliver. Splterl's voice sounds remlnis clent of Maria McKH, former lead for Lone Justice, on several songs, most notably -Turill Has Gone.· But Splterl's seems much more confi dent and controlled. McErlalne is an original, Despite being almost secon- whether he's playing slide on the album-ending "Future Is Promises,· or revving It up for the heavier sounding "fight The Feeling: " dary to these two talents, this album's songs are also surprisingly strong. The best of the batch is ·1 Don't Want A Lover,• the first single. However, each of the LPs other songs Is almost as good. All in all, Texas impresses as much as any new band of 1989. Their sound is amazing by nature and consistent, especially consider ing that this is their first effort. And in the future, more is certain to be seen of them, and of their two talented leaders. Big Audio Dynamlle: MBgatop Phson« . When tbe aaah emerged from England's punk scene In the late 70s, It was primarily because the band had the talent needed to combine killer melodies with seri ous, Introspective lyrics. So when the group eventually broke up, Clash fans had reason to be hopeful that Its leaders would continue to chum out good music~ This faith was somewhat justified when Mick Jones formed B.A.D. Joe Strummer reunited with his former bandmate on B.A.D.'s second album, No.10 Upping Strfft to handle production chores. Overall, the band has churned out three fairly good albums with a unique style, mixing Jones' punkish vocals with hot dance beats and band member Don Letts' strange pop culture volceovers. The group's new album basi cally continues In this vein, while adding a few more reggae-like touches. Jones' lyrics are still up to par, but the music, forthe most part, doesn't keep pace. Jones excels when his lyrics are personal, and this record is no different. Two of his best efforts, "Union, Jeck" and "London Bridge,• relate directly to Jones' feelings about Britain, and his attempts to make sense of It all. He fares worse when attempting other types of songs, such as his pseudo-parody attempt• James Brown• and the Asian-bashing -Oregon Town,• which is remlniscient of the band's eartier•Sony.. . While the music does have Its high points, It is dlssappolntlng. The band sounds as H It Is simply using the same drum beat for fNery song, a practice which gets tiresome very quickly. Only when B.A.D. tries · something different.does the sound really take off. Two such high points are "RewiOO- and the instrumental sample-fest •Mick's a Hpple Burn ing; This album was put together after Jones' long stay in a"hospital. Fittingly, the problem with Megatop Pheonix is, to paraphrase from Jones himself, that although he may be feeling fine, the beats definitely aren't fresh. And while the album isn't terrible, neither Is It anything for Clash fans to write home about. I Entertainment Wayouts: . A groovy -sound 'Sensation' by JENNIE BODDY uR-1 r.tiaic Corraspondenl The fabulous Wayouta hold onto the crown of oooldom, even as they rise to new heights. About five feet high on_ stage at Sensations last Wednesday, that is babum, chal 'What's really the wlerdest about playing Sensations Is the feeling of looking out Into the audience, and because everyone's on the dance fk>or, all you see Is empty chairs and • all these little heads bobbing up and down In front of you: says drummer The Steve. · Truly, the Ideal backdrop for the group Is crowded together In a pool of grunglness, with lots of stinky bop sters tripping the dark fantastic. No matter. When a trio has the sound so many have searched for, ihe British Invasion on 70 cups of oottee, ·any place could kinda, sorta In a way be - the London Palladium, where bassist · Eric Apczynskl would like to roCk. But the moody maverick also says he prefers to play In a basement alone, where no one can hear him. Alas, so many might feel so lost If this was allowed, though. Like Dan Cogswell, MSU landscape architect - junior, who expressed his deeprooted · love for the group. Tm glm the Wayouts are play- ing,· Cogswell says. - So even if guitarist Jim Diamond expresses a yearning to give the whole thing up and concentrate on good clean living, fans are lucky the tragedy In his life just Won't let him stop. And hopefully things are gonna · happen with the trio well-deserving of a Dick Clark special and much, much more. With a new manager, Jim Potter (a swell and aggressive fellow) the cats will, If they don't anger the ~s too m~ continue to play way too fast and way too loud for 811, espe clflly third world countries and any others who haven't heard the Word. Unllkethevery hip Lime Giants manager, muslcaflclonadoJamle Depola, ~said of Wednesday's show, "like, like, like (while hitting the back of her palm for emphasis), I could not get over the hugeness of the guitar, man, but the bass Is pretty rockin', and of course we all know about the drummer.• Playing In cooperation with 89 Fl Imped Radio's .mlo-adlve-type promotk>n Wedne&day nights at Sensations, and s0on to be seen Od. 1 O and 20 at The L.andsh&rk, the boys also will release a tape by Christmas at latest. Plenty of songs for your grand mothers, Diamond says. Locally, though, they continue to please people like Luke Breken, studio art senior, king of the hlpshake ~finely oiled machine, who says, "These cats are highly original and power-packed, not to mention glnchy. • Sooo, put some notches on your dance shoes, cuz the Wayouts love you and you love them, too. (Lime) Giant-Hit Lime Giant lead singer Mark Demming croons -to a houaefull of partygoera at a Gunaon Street bash Saturday night. - - r:_-.. Ted White's ego ·overshadows -his talent Preceding the Wayouta' per formance Wednesday was a warm-up by Ted White and company. While White obviously did not benefit from the same aowd partisan- · ship the Wayouts enjoyed, his per formance still lacked. More or less, White Is just too uptight. - · He can play the guitar. But when paired with the de rlgeur ripped jeans, (they probably cost $80), song selection and the feeling the audience . gets of •rm bad, so watdl me so you can tell your grandkids someday,• Whitedlssappoints. White's song selection left a lot to be desired, too. Too many slow cover songs and not enough funky originals. Hs best songs fealured slap bass combined with a hard edged guitar. The others sounded Hice watered down Chlc11QOCOY81"S. . - White wasni helped, either, , now-forgotten song by INXS. - by several technical glitches during his set, as he and his bass player broke strlngs during the set. . But engineering aside, White's stage presence and overall choice of lnst~mentatlon (whY electronic drums?) enticed most fans Musically-Inclined concertgo- ers stageslde predicted this comblna- · tlOn of flash with little originality coupled with his family ties, (his mom _ Is Aretha Franklin), will be enough to propel him to success on MTV (or at least Star Seardl with Ed McMahon.). · to wait patiently for the headliner& from Bedrock. Forthe most part, White's tremendous ego served to eclipse his - musicianship and the talent& of his back-up band. And they were tal- - ented. While White sat oftstage dragging a cigarette and repairing his broken string, the Other members of the band (the drummer, sax player, bass player and trumpet player) . jammed with no voe:&! Interruption. They actually took off, until White came back onstage tor a cover of a The prediction here Is that White will follow the recent trend of 60's makeovers and hit it big with a cover of Sly-and the Family Stone's "Thank You Falletlnme Be Mloe Elf.• One final note to the emcees - from WDBM. It's understandable that you want to promote the station and the conoapt of r8dio-actlve Wednes- day Is a good one (even though most people woutd opt tor a different venue), ~- tone ~down and save the shades tor a sunny day. . • David Stem'na -. - 'DBM stands for dumb. Al•tar'na-tlva - n. 1. affording a dlolce. Well I guess If you put It that simply, that's what WDBM does. I suppose I should consider myself lucky to be In a market that affords a choice. Detroit doesn't, not even New York does. But I must be an Ingrate because I feel Irritated, not lucky. Oh boy, flnlllly a radio station on which I can listen to The Cure, The Bunneyheads and the stylized moan- _ Ing and groaning of MOrrissey. Sorry guys, you're falling pretty Short in length and width (see Webster's under ela'llch). - Doni misunderstand, these guys are fine, but th~y got their airplay seven years ago on stations like _ WLBS. You might as well play The Who. Oh, I forgot 'DBM (Dumb?) is the only place to hear bands like Nuclear Crisis.and Circus of Power! Well my skateboard must be broken, and I can only pick my no5e to it for about 1 o mlnUtes. Please allow me to speak my mind, 'cause I'm gonna anyway: Let's start with programming; hello - In there, anybody home? You've got a load under your noses and you cani even smell it. I'm talking about the minimal exposure local bands get. I don~tthink you're very accessible to them, unless of couse they're on staff there. Why doesn't someone come up with a feature format show for Midllgan bands both new and _old? Gee Wally. I dunno. Wouldn't it be great to hear The Doe_ Boys back of a dusty old Stoog~ record? Or maybe the MCS back the Lime Giants? As a favono me would you have one of your mixmasters mix Wally Pleasant with Alice Cooper. · Wtckee, wickee, wickee. We've heard some oommendable long-format programming so far like "Total chaos· and "Straightaway .• We've also heard some slop like "HourO' Slobber.·There's nothing worse to study to on a Monday night than nolze by guys who think Vivaldi Is a brand of french tickler. This Is programming forthe pre-pubescent. See 'DBM, p. 10 /