May 1990 Vol. I No. 23 MSU's alternative and truly inde endent voice What's shakin' : McWilliams casts more pearls to swine check out his message. p. 6 oOur readers are always write ... o Get Geeked this week, brudder .. . o Find Out what's About, holmes .. . o Roll over for Dog Boy ... oOur reviews tell it all ... O Entertainment abounds ... p.5 p.6 p.8 p.8 p. 11 p. 9-12 Minorities charge that MSU 1s actions are not so affirmative BY STACY LAMMERS uR-1 ISSUES CORRESPONDENT While MSU administrators cook up ideas to improve minority hiring on campus, area minority groups and officials believe that affirmative action simmers on the university's back. burner. Responding to an affirmative action prog ress report recently outlined by the administra tion, minority leaders and officials argue that MSU has not done enough for recruitment and retention of minority students and faculty. "We're not ·satisfied with the results," said Ernest Moore, MSU audiology professor and president of the Black Faculty Administration Association. "Minorities are being hired, but at a low rate. "The administration needs to balance out the hiring." Moore said President John DiBiaggio has contri>uted to the problem of minority hiring on campus He said the BFAA issued a report card on President DiBiaggio's role in increas ing minority academic personnei at MSU. The President's grade? "We gave him an 'F,' "Moore. said. "The· president has made 10 key appointments since 1985 - and not one of thbse was to an Afri can-American. "He indicates support for affirmative action but does not actively support it." DiBiaggio could not be reached for com ment. According to MSU's 1988-89 Affirmative Action Report, the total amount of academic personnel increased by 111 individuals to 4, 101 from fall 1989 to fall 1990. Of those 4, 101 individuals, 438 of them are minorities, which accounts for nearly 12 percent of total academic personnel at MSU .. Within the tenure system, the report shows Total Academic Personnel •4, 101 total •483 minorities (an increase of 10 people from Fall 1988) •Minorities comprise 9 percent of MSU's academic personnel Tenure System •2, 112 total •201 minorities (an increase of 5 people from Fall 1988) •Minorities hold 9.5 percent of MSU's tenured positions that African-American academic personnel increased from 71 to 79, a nearly 4-percent increase. However, hiring figures for other minority groups did not reflect that jump According to the report, the number of Native American academic personnel at MSU remained at three. Hispanics hired·decreased by about 1 percent from 19 to 18. The number of Asiarv'Pacific Islanders hired decreased from 103 to 101, a nearly 5-percent decrease. These figures have left Amy Purvis, presi dent of the Asian-Pacific American Student Organization (APASO), dissatisfied. "More minority faculty members need to be hired because the students need role models, and currently there just aren't enough," Purvis said. But Provost David Scott says the university during the past year has taken extra steps to create a diverse community among MSU academic personnel. In a progress review press release on af firmative action released April 6, Scott said: "MSU has a long history of commitment to creating a diverse community ... But over the last year there are clear signs of a new level of energy and achievement." Scott partially credits the university's progress in hiring minorities to the MSU Institu tional Diversity: Excellence in Action (IDEA), designed to promote diversity, excellence and community. Introduced about a year ago, the 50-point IDEA plan measures the progress of the administration on affirmative action. Some key concerns of IDEA are: recruitment and reten tion of faculty, students, and support staff; instruction, research, and outreach; and the academic climate itself. According to the progress report, since Don't even try missing this week's provocative Dr. Sex or dr.sexative Provocateur... p. 7 uR-1 g-aphic/M.L Eulat, artworkiSmE .IAaoNOSK1, SOI.fee: MSU See ACTION, p. 2 2 • university Reporter-Intelligencer 2 May 1990 From ACTION, p. 2 IDEA was set in motion 12 of the 50 initiatives have been successfully implemented and progress has been made on 16 others: Also, initial action has begun on 15 more points. "The MSU IDEA will give the university some viable targets for achievement of diver sity on campus," said Ralph Bonner, Director of Human Relations at MSU. But to African-American student leader Darius Peyton , the university's programs such as IDEA, and statistics provided in progress reports, only scratch the surface of minority hiring problems facing MSU. Peyton says more needs to be done. "People like neat packages, and that's what (the administration) has been giving us," Peyton said. "They don't want anyone to rock the boat." Despite efforts by the MSU administration to progress in affirmative action, Peyton be lieves administrators are going about things the wrong way. Moore noted that "MSU has the highest black enrollment among Big Ten universities," and said of his criticism of DiBiaggio: "This is not in any way a personal vendetta." However, he added that affirmative action must move ahead. "African-Americans have a long, rich heritage," Moore said. "We have learned both our own and the white history. "Majority students need to learn about (our) background also because education is the key to progress." · MSU by the numbers ••• Minorities In Tenured Positions Asian Americans/PacHic Islanders Fall 1988 - 103 Fall 1989 - 101 Asian/Pacific Islanders hold 4.8 percent of total tenured positions; African Americans Fall 1988 - 71 Fall1989 - 79 African Americans hold 3. 7 percent of total tenured positions; Hispanics Fall 1988 - 19 Fall1989 - 18 Hispanics hold .9 percent of total tenured posi tions; American Indians Fall1988 - 3 Fall 1989 - 3 American Indians hold .1 percent of total tenured positions Minority students at MSU African Americans Fall 1988 - 2,703_ Fall 1989 - 2,865 Asian Americans/PacHic Islanders Fall 1988 - 797 Fall 1989-858 . Hispanics Fall 1988-385 Fall 1989 - 405 Chicano/Mexican Fall 1988 - 227 Fall 1989 - 256 American Indian/Alaskan Native Fall 1988 - 145 Fall 1989 - 160 TOTAL TENURED POSITIONS AT MSU, FALL . 1989: 2, 112. The number of tenured minorities increased by 2.6 percentin 1989, from 196 to 201 SOUCE: MSU THE TOTAL NUMBER OF MINORlnES AT MSU INCREASED FROM 4,257 IN FALL 1988 to 4,544 IN FALL 1989, AN INCREASE OF .6 PERCENT. . MINORlnES COMPRISED 10.6 PERCENT OF MSU's STUDENT BODY IN FALL 1989. there are many worthy organizations at MSU that ~eed energetic and enthusiastic volunteers to help them achieve their honorable and selfless missions, enriching us all among them Is the uR-1, which Is looking for people to fill positions as: •advertising account executives; •news, issues, and enter tainment correspon dents; •photographers; •artists; •graphic designers (must know pagemaker 3.02); •graphic artists; •distribution personnel; •typists; •accountants; •libel lawyers; •and jes' plain folks. Residence Halls Sign Up For Fall 1990 During Spring Term 1990 SIGN UP LOCATIONS WILL BE ANNOUNCED IN EACH RESIDENCE HALL OFF-CAMPUS STUDENTS AND UNIVERSITY APARTMENTS STUDENTS Sign up for Residence Halls on Wed. May 2 and Thu. May 3. Application must first be made and a housing application fee of $25 paid at the Residence Halls Assignments Office, University Housing Building on Service Road 355-7460 8:30 am-4:30 pm The Housing Contract is in effect for the entire academic year. Returning students must sign the housing contract when making a room reservation. Spring - term graduates are eligible to reserve a space in Owen Graduate Center Roommate requests: On-campus roommate requests must have paperwork completed by May 15. Roommate choices of students currently living off campus or new to the University will be honored if their housing applications are,on file in the Residence Halls Aslsignments Office by May 15. Cancelling a reservation automatically cancels any roommate request. Voluntary triples cannot be reserved during sign-up. Space cannot be reserved in more than one hall. Applicants may make a change after cancelling the first reservation in person. Buying, selling or signing over housing space Is a violation of the haousing contract and the University reserves the right to cancel any reseervatlons made in this manner. Cancellations of fall term reservations and contracts must be made by Aug.1. Students that do not cancel their reservations by that date and enroll for classes will be financially responsible according to the terms of the housing contract. , i / university Reporter-Intelligencer Page Three The Second Front Page Campus Watch keeps an· eye peeled for crime .I - . BY CHRIS KLAVER uR-1 SPECIAL CORRESPONDENT The recent wave of thefts at Michigan State University has some students scared that they will be the next victims. One group of students, how ever, is taking an-active role in ending the crime wave - Prevention/Campus Watch Pro gram. the Loss Campus Watch, modeled after the nationwide Neighborhood Watch, organizes students to help them more effectively protect their own and other persons' property. "The basic object of the group is students helping students," said Steve' salter, captain for Campus Watch at Wilson Hall. Salter, who joined the group in Holden Hall last year after being robbed by his roommate, said all members go through a short tra\n\nc;;l sess\on. Members are taught the important things to look for at the scene of a crime, such as descriptions of people involved , the time_ the incident c1ccurred and mem6ry techniques to avoid forgetting things before the infor mation can be written down. Group members, called offi cers, also are taught how to ask witnesses about what happened to help them get the information correct. Salter said officers also can receive seH-defense training. The group currently is working on providing CPR training. Campus Watch officers are strictly observers, Salter said. They do not have the power to arrest anyone, he said, adding they only can repo~ what they see to the police or the hall manage- ment. year in Holden Hall. ears," he said. "That's all we are, is eyes and · Officers also become part of "Somebody ... took the TV from a (resident ,assistant's) room, and somebody saw it going down the 111111q~~mm1111~ 1agm .:.:.:.)\i?i/f it/~{:::::::::. .. . .· ... :.;.;.;.:-:.:.:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::)~:)~{:::::::::::>·\::::.:.:-:.:-:·······. ·.·.·. . ..... . :-:-:·:-:-:-:-:-:.:·:..:-.·.·..... :<<:>::::::::::::::::::::·:·::::::::::::::::::;.:-:.;-:-:-:-: ·:-:-::::::::::::::::::::::{:??>::::::::::::::::<:>>~:}}~:~:~{·:·:·:·:.:.: ..... ::: ·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.· .. ·.·.·.·.-.:.:_:_:_:_:_:_ :::::::::::::::::::·:·:.:.s.·§~~~§Q::::10·$.$:::.:":.·:-::: .. ::.:::::::::::::::-::::::::--·-:::::::_:::::-_:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::.:::·::::::::::::::::::\.:..\\\ --· ::::::::::::: : : : : : : :·:·:·:·:·:·:<<"' ::: .. .. '. .·.·.:-::::::::::::::::::::::::::-:·.·:. :u:::u:::::::u:_:::n::::::::::::::::::::::::::::-:::::::::n: ::::::-:::::::.:::::::::::::::::::.:·:: ::nu:::::::u:u:::n::::·:::::j:y$.~µf¥.~£bP.$.:t . .·.·. ::·:·:':':':':\:':':' ... .:-· -:. :.;.;.:.::~ ::::::- : :: .·.·.·.·. . . the telephone network within their hall, Salter said. If something happens on the floor, all the officers in the hall, as well as the police and the hall management, can be notified quickly and be on the lookout for the persons in- volved. Salter said the network helped - to thwart at least one theft last stairwell (on) about the fifth floor," he said. "Through the phone tree, _ by the time they got down to the second floor, somebody was down there and intercepted it."- As well .as being eyes and ears, the officers also work to educate their neighbors on how to protect themselves from theft and attack both in and out of the hall. One of the programs the group is working on in Wilson Hall is called Operation Identification. Officers go door to door through out the halLwith engravers to allow - studerits to mark valuables. Salter said all valuables should be marked with a driver's license number so that if they are stolen and recovered, police can quickly identify the owner. The numbers are part of a nationwide computer system, and the owner could be .found by any police agency in the country. The group also is trying to or ganize a buddy system for people walking on campus at night. - The individual officers help by organizing floor meetings to pass on information to the residents. Officer Maureen Hall, the De partment of Public Sat ety commu nity officer for Wiison, Holden, Wonders and Case halls, said the group alsq has helped to reduce the amount of vandalism and damage in the halls. As well as working with fellow students, Campus Watch officers work closely with DPS and the hall management both to learn more about preventing-crime within the - halls and to help identify and solve security problems throughout the campus. Campus Watch was started in 1987 by DPS Sgt. David Trexler. Most of the individual ·groups have been organized by a DPS officer, but there are some groups operat ing independently, Hall said. Anyone_ interested in joining or starting a Campus Watch group should contact DPS. If you mlsse.d last week's - -or any other week's - uR-1, back copies are available free of char9e _fro~ our offices at 142 Gurison street, East l.Qnsing, Ml 4882~. e e the university Reporter-Intel I igencer . 2 -May-1990 · ·· ············ · ··· · · ·· · · ······ ·· ·· ············ · 1-- . I l-OOK! 1 1 hired I arot~ ~~~! I I I I l f I I I ' l ~ · . ;/frrmafve~ ... ~:iy iunaf . .. --- .- ------~°V4 A - - - . - - - - - -1 ~;'Q) ;/Jven~~ '" I I · I I I I I I I - I I I I ~ u I , _________ L ______________ _ ~ uR-1 artwork/STEVE JABLONOSKI Let's put the affirmative back ·. into the term Affrimative Action For years, discrimination has pervaded and undermined American institutions, blocking progress and creating practical and moral dilemmas for hundreds of thousands. In response, programs such as Affirmative Action were constructed and implemented to cure some of the social ills in a country where a man or woman's skin color could lock them into a dead end job - a one-way licket to nowhere, purchased at birth and stamped by a narrow-minded moron with fair skin and unfair ideas. But universities are the exception, are they not? Here, we are more enlightened and receptive to new ideas, right? _ One of our best presidents was black, wasn't he? Well, yes. So why is it that when we see our top administrators in the newspapers and on television that they have one unmistakable trait in common - white skin. · Oh, there is Lee June and Moses Turner, but June is a relative new comer to his position and Turner is far too often pointed to as "Our Black . Administrator." . We have no need for tokens, and are disgusted at the 'cynicism behind the constant use of Individual ex- · am pies to say, "Look, we are helping our poor black brothers by letting one of thsm work with some of us: And, we are alarmed that minority administrators are often chosen to deal with minority or "specialty" affairs - as if those matters were too trivial for a white man to deal with. · Cer tainly, belonging to a specific group gives one a valuable inside perspec tive, but to imply that only a minority can care about ·or comprehend minority -issues is a sad statem~nt about how much effort the administra tion is willing to put into learning about new areas and new experiences. Where do we get the idea that affirmative action is neither affirmative nor very activ·e at MSU? Do we hang around the Admini- stration Fortress drinking sOdas in the wood-paneled offices of MSU's · rulers? l;iave we examined the official photos of MSU's brass? No, unlike the administration, we listened to one of the voices in our own backyard. Ernest Moore, an MSU audiology professor and president of the Black Faculty Administration Association, said his organization was unsatisfied with President John DiBiaggio's . affirmative action efforts. 'We gave him an 'F;' " Moore said. "The president has made 1 o key appointments since 1985 - and not one of those· was to an African American. "He indicates support for affirma tive action but does not actively · support it." This, we f~ar, is true. ·it is time to end tokenism and start taking action - Affirmative Action, that is. . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . ... . . ... ........ . . . . :•:•14?•@@~:$N:@~tM'i.h~ihQ.~:M1:: ••<:•·-··•·•-·••··m••µo.N•r~iJY<•_._:_ .. <···········•• •• ~'P:9.'.ff ,rH6t,fli9.i6~~f :" • / • > • ~J,,:O. <•• )(\()\} ·:~~~~~gill~-~iii!iii .••. /•: ....... : ····~1:ifU:~~·::•••:::-:•:···:•••}··? . :-:·.··.·.•?$~fr@~.····:······•·>·········· •fr~~~B.akic:l~•i••-••- ·.·. ·.·.·.·.·.·.·.-. ·. ·. ·.·.· :-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:.:-: ·-~ij~~~~~«®.~~ij¢~~M@~\ ... -: :-.".: • ... _·.· Ary~1'•$9t~¥3?::Y ::: tt.rn . ·········:@&:~~~~~·®®.r~~~-·-:>•••·: ······: . -. •Rg~¢~it!!Wt•. -.... ·_·. - . . ·· ···.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.· :::;:::::::::::::::::::: ···· ···:::: ··· · - ·•r%···~1.,1 ·--:.•::-•: ~~~~{9)~~~:•~~~M~~~C§#~·:C••··· . _ : ><~9§t(f?Wb'.!9.,!''¥••• • •• <> u:•·•~i~®®«~:-~~~®®.~ti: · · · · · · • MatthewGoebet> --.. · · · ::·:•:•::•:•:::•:::$t'-V.~J_gP19o9~l :-:-: ... .. .. . ...... .... -:-:-:-:-~:~:\:\:\:\:~~~~~~~~~~j:;:~:~:;:;.;.;.;.; ••·tor:~.$t~P.hin•tciJ¢V. '· . · . ·-~.·-· ·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.· :-:-:-:-:-:·:·:·:·:·:·:·:·:·:·:·: . . . . . . . . -·-:-:-:-:.;.:-:::-:.:-:-:<·> . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .·.·.·.· :-:-:.:- . . . ... . ·.· .·. ·.·.·.-.·-·.·.·.· :-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:-:- •:::::.:::::•@.~HR@O~irifu~~~m©t\ ..... ••••-•••·l?r.·•ij4Hti:r·-~Jt6.9m~P.:.•··:·:• ·-:-:-:-:-:-:.·-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:- ::::::::~•11~~··~1~~( .. /)::1::i:ii:::1ffi,~~:~~-l~~1iiii/tjl!li/:::::: r•~•«; . . . . . . . . •••• .t •·• ··~~wmf!t.t. -· . . . >MILElricif :::•<: :>: :: · · · >>>>>>~ -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:-:-: .. _ •• : rr~~~~-~~~fr:@}~ij~~w~ · · · ·_·_· >>~<<<~Y\)M}~ittere:~~~>:. · · · ·.·.· .... . .. :-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:-:-:-:-:.:-:- · · · · · · · · · · - - · · · · · · · · · · · · - · · · · · · :-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:.:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- .... .... . . .. · · .. ... .. .. .. .. •••••"l:.n~RJi~11m"!t!fll14.~•1.1:r-••· ···:•:#6~f9~8-t#f~~#6##.t:•'M~t!t .·.·.·.·-:-:-:·:····•·•·•1ttJ.d..!(i~:~iJ'illtqijS.~•·•:···•·•:••:····:····· . . . > • • • :$(;: tlit!t~i. >> ::-:::: <:> :: 2 May 1990 university Reporter-Intelligencer • 5 and Judiasm were unfortunately warranted. By not balancing it's coverage and checking its facts, the uR-1, in its April 11th edition, serious insulted the Jews on campus and slandered Hillel, Secor and The State News. A correction is in order. Sincerely, Dr. Mark Finkelstein Executive Director Hillel Jewish Student Center Robinson did assert, incor rectly, that Hillel paid for Secor's trip to Israel. It was, in fact, the 4nti-Defamation League that funded his trip - a fact the uR-1 pointed out this fall. We apologize to Hillel for any inconvenience or anguish Robinson's published comment may have caused. On the other hand, we be lieve that our April 11th story was meticulously fair and gave both sides of the issue equal space and opportunity to state their cases. The question of which group - Hillel or the Anti-Defamation League - paid for Secor to visit Israel was not as crucial as the question of was Secor biased because he accepted a. free trip from a special interest group? We stand by our story and appreci ate Dr. Finke/stein's comments. r••••••••••••••••••••••··-~ ·I Reader Response Card I I I I Something on your mind? Got to say something and say it for I I I 10,000 people to see? Out of stationery? Well, then, this is I the ticket for you . I - . I Yep, Clem, it's the uR-1 reader response card in which you en I I I let us have it or PRAISE us without having to waste any of I your own trees. Think of it as premature recuycling of the ole I I I uR-1. I Please, write us! I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I ~ I -~ .. ,-:itJ!J?:~!;.r;I:~Tul~:i::: I Sincerely, ;:~ .··W:ti/:4)$}} • •·---------------------.1 Yourname . · -ed. Hillel demands apology from uR-1 Dear Ms. Baldas: It is the hateful myth that the Jews control the media. But this is the impr~ssion that the uR-1 reinforced when on April 11th it published "Walkout Rocks State News." Because uR-/failed to check the veracity of MSU NAACP President Jeffrey Robinson's assertion that Hillel sent Editor-In Chief John Secor to Israel, uR-1 gave creedence to Robinson's insinuation that Secor biased his paper's coverage on Farrakhan as a return favor to Hillel. The fact is that Hillel did not send Secor to Israel and that Secor owes us nothing. Secondly we've yet to learn how The State News' coverage on Farrakhan was biased to begin with. Bigotry in whatever form should be uncov ered and repud\a\ed. uR~f's own editorial acknowledged that Farra khan scapegoated Jews during his MSU speech. So any prior cover age that focused on Farrakhan's statements with regards to Jews . :~ . . . . ::; Congratulations are truly in order George - you've become the first Geek to repeat, garnering Geek 'o the Week dishonors for the second time this year! If only the football team could put that kind of winning streak together. But whyfor are you scorned encore? Simple: Even DiB won't have anything to do with you, as we saw when the newspapers printed a letter in which he rejected the olive branch you extended. He doesn't even want bowl watches or sovenirs anymore! Sheesh! Ever feel like a bastard at a fami.ly reunion, Geo? Gues_s what, you're half right. Only this ain't no family reunion. See you in the Toilet Bowl, puddin' head. 6 • university Reporter-Intelligencer '"' 2 May 1990 Sorry, Geo; book idea has to go M.L. Elrick NO WAY, Brudder! That's what I told the former Jets' coach when he approached me about ghostwriting his autobiog raphy after the Green and White Game. You see, it seems the big guy had seen what Mitch Alborn had done for Bo Schembechler -what with his best-selling autobiography and all- and he wanted some green and white for himself. Some of that mean green - but of course not LEAN green. But, I digress. A wise man capitalizes on fleeting fame, or infamy, as the case maybe. So George sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and sat and decided to try a forward pass and sat and sat and sat and forgot about this season's pass and sat and sat and sat and had a thought. A thought?! Sure, he thought, why shouldn't he, Big George, a hero after all, he reasoned, pen his autobiography (with someone else's pen, of course). So I said, "Yep, today coaches get big bucks for other things like shoe contracts, threatening boost ers, television shows, etc., so why not the proceeds of a book about his illustrious career as a man, hus band, father, and coach?" That comment didn't sit well, but the coach soon swallowed his anger (alorig with three pizzas) and was again misty-eyed pitching his book. "What about Geo?" he asked, hoping to capitalize on a name for the tome that would reflect the brief, snappy title of Schembechler's successful scroll. I told him it was good that they both began with a consonant and ended with a vowel, but other than that, I wasn't too keen on the title . . I made my pitch for something more characteristic of the jolly green average-sized man. "How 'bout They Weren't Heavy, They're My Brudders, Brudder," I proposed. George said that title excited him as much as not running up the middle, so we dropped the idea. But the title could wait, this would be no simple task. In addition to telling his story, George thought we might want to include some helpful hints at the back of the book for aspiring athletes and coaches. Now, I told Geo he was on the right track He suggested things like keep ing good family values, maintaining a relationship with God, working hard, finishing school, etc. "Don't forget to mention how to deal with the media and how to smuggle contraband into incarcer ated student-athletes," I reminded . him, conveniently remembering not to note that student-athlete was a textbook example of an oxymoron. On a roll, I quickly followed up with: "Or helpful fashion tips (tan on green is almost as good as tan on tan) and how to show mercy to an inferior opponent by refusing to let one drug-infested miscreant run across their goal line repeatedly." Ignoring the low growling I heard coming from his general direction, I gave the coach a few more ideas for the book: "Why not include chapters on dealing gracefully with criticism; working within an ir:istitution; building successful relationships with admin istrators; and how to gain 30 pounds, lose most of your hair, get zits and get mean in a few short days," I inquired. . Now a little advice for inquiring minds ... George is a fat, middle aged man, but one who still has a little quickness. As soon as I put my head back on, we ended our meeting with little resolved and no publishing contract in any stage of preparedness. Slowly, I left the shrine in Duffy Daugherty, admiring the awards and photos of Spartan glory. Behind me sat a great man. A man who has been through a lot lately. A man with something streaming sadly down his face. Yes, behind me sat a great man who has been through a lot, now drowning in a pool of his own drool. How's this for a title: Yeech. Elrick tries to design the uR-1. That's right kiddies ... it's Pravda! people, as if it were a single entity. This is simply because every person has unique feelings, opinions, and judgments about nearly everything. What is good for me may suck for you. What you consider decent, others may think obscene. It is because of this subjectivity regarding what is good, decent, and fair, that our laws must be based in some original assumptions regarding what is good, decent and fair. The system that America was originally designed around was one of "Natural Law." This is simply the believe that each of us owns ourselves_. This also includes those things which are inseparable from us: our bodies, actions, thoughts, and property. · Government was originally built to make sure that no one, through force, fraud, or intimidation, would interfere with our ability to dispose of, as we wish, our bodies, property or labor. And this meant no one. No justification could exist, under natural law, for the violation of your natural rights. Yet now, Government is the force doing the violating, and a non existent entity, "The People," is the rationale. Consider homosexuality. Having sex with someone of the same sex is everyone's right. If both parties consent, they have the right to do what they want with their bodies. But some politicians have passed laws against this act. Whether you want to have homosexual relations is immaterial. It is your natural right, should you choose to do so. This law hasn't helped "The People." It has violated the rights of everyone. It's just that some people don't mind, since it involves something they ha~n't planned to do in the first place. In the same light, it is your right to not wear a seat belt, or helmet; or to buy what you want with your money; or to own whatever weapon you care to have if /OU are responsible with it. For the Government to make laws . contrary to these truths is illegal and immoral, for it implies that . they own you (and, by implication, your property I money I anc;t labor). ' You can learn what it means to have force used against you for acting as though you own yourself. Just try growing marijuana; not filling out government forms; working without a social security card; refusing the draft; being a prostitute; owning a dog, car or business without a license; owning land or a house without inspections or property tax; putting "drugs" in yourself; having sex except in governmentally approved "moral" ways; hanging around naked; swearing on the radio; or teaching your kids at home. . And this is only the beginning of abuses which the Government has created. Aggressions which the founding fathers tried to prevent by creating our present system of Government are now perpetrated by that same Government. To believe otherwise is to ignore reality. .••.•. _.··. M¢W.i!1@.m$~ f6."®~6f¥.W..ili:·•.• . :f:!llW.=;.~jgj3.~lij~-1:·> •:·:•:·•·•Pl>lf@IJriY. .. :WP.<;;!IJti:::~t-... ·.·.·.·.· .... •:::t;cmfi;I(#: ~WilH.4ffl~~·•4.C) S.e>::::•:•• ••••••·•Pr·W#t.f69Mm· 90hil.:#R:-t~••••••·· ••••··••••·•••••Gunson steef •offiC/fls~ :::~1111n:.11-:t~mr1:•:• ····Jhe :u11;;iat3s. 1~4899•forinorf1 ••• · · · · • • • HniofrriOiionL< ·• < • • • . :.:.:.:_:_:_:_: _:.;,: .·.·.·.·.·-·.·.-.:_:_:_.:::::::::::::::::::::::::::.: ... :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: • * Tom McWilliams lW • So some of you don't believe that our rights are actually endangered. "Government is necessary to· protect The People." It is true that Government exists to provide for so-called National Defense, and to povide a system of justice for contract disputs and aggressors of human rights (killers, rapists, robbers). But thi does not protect "The People." "The People" is an almost meaningless phrase that can .only be interpreted as meaning a group of individuals, usually many millions of individuals. No one can possible judge the feeling and opinions of a group of millions of 2 May 1990 university Reporter-Intelligencer • 7 behavior as an over-extensino of ego boundaries in that the partners enlarge their egos to include the other person's. It is neither positive nor healthy, even in marriage, because it means one partner is using their pesonal power to control the relationship, a situation I call the TYRANNY OF THE WEAK. In the movie, when Glenn Close (superficially) slashed her wrists to make Michael Douglas stay and he held her until she felt better, I leaned ove rand said to Stephanie: "That was a serious error on his part." Of course, people three rows ahead turned around and said, "SHUT UP!" When she began to pull this crap, he had to look her right in th eye and say, "HEY! I don't take this!" and run, not walk, to the nearest exit. Of course, if he had done this, the movie wold have ended right there. Which is exactly my point. The moment anyone allows another person to control their behavior by manipulative shit, the relationsihp is dead. Get out before it begins to stink, it is only going to get worse. Cut your losses, back out, don't try to help because you can't. Anyone who stoops to this level of childish manipulation is operating out of a. feeling of total lack of control and self-esteem. They need immediate professional help and all the support and/or talking you might give them will only make your life worse, plus you aren't doing a damned thing for them. Are yoiu a mental health professioanl? Are you charging them an hourly rate? And if.you are, you had better not be sexually involved with them because they are your damned CLIENT! Fatal Attraction is about a person whose life is so empty, they only want to die to end the pain. If Michael Douglas had let her commit suicide (assuming that was her intent with the wrist-s lashing, although I doubt it really was), his family wold have been spared a lot of (her) pain. He could have taken responsibility for hi sown behavio by walking away but·by allowing the manipulation, he became the agent of her Karma. (According to many Eastern ph11osopnies, IT you save someone, you take responsibility for his or her life. He saved he rat that moment so he and his wife could kill her later, only he didn't know it.) It also would have ended the game immediately if he had told his wife what had happened the moment his happy home was threatened. But because he was such a wimp, he prolonged the game and allowed her to act as if she actually deserved his attention (a lot like George Bush and the Savings and Loan fiasco. Watch George and his merry men have to blow this shit out of the water). Back in the olden days, when I was dating around, as it were, even kindly old Dr. Sex occasionally ran into someone who thought they were in love because they never felt such an intense level of sexual response. If I broke a date because I was going toone of our graduate student Mazola parties and did not need a partner, they wyould pull this kind of shit: "I can't live without you," they would so, . "life is empty without you. I'm going to kill myself." If we were talkin on th ephone, I would hang up immediately. If the peson called back, I would hang up again and not answer the phone or ask my.next-door neighbor to come over to take the call. She had a great, sexy phone-voice and would make it clear that we were involved in something really good. "I'm sorry; she would say "his mouth is full right now. He can't come to the phone, if you get my drift." Sort of like that great scene in Deep Throat where Linda Lovelace arrives home from the doctor's office to find her roommate on the kitchen table, smoking a cigarette, being lingually manipulated by the grease-ball grocery delivery boy. (D_id you know that our word lecher comes from the lndo-European root meaning ''to lick?" Keep it in mind guys.) Once, I had someone threaten me right in my own apartment. I couldn't believe it. It was the next morning after the night before. I was leaving to meet another date across town. When she told me she planned to kill herself, I ran into the bathroom to get me pacKage oT single-edged razor blades I kept on hand for just such an emergency, that and snake bites, if you know what I mean. As I pressed them into her hand, I instructed her to bend her hand toward her hand because this movement exposes the radial artery and makes cutting it much easier. As I ran out the door I said, "Please do it in the bathtub because my landlord will keep my damage deposit if you get blood all over the carpet. Blood stains are hell to get out." I never did find out what happened and would you believe she stole my single-edge blades too? I will never understand women. Give them great sex ·one night and they steal your razor blades the next day. But I digress. Tell your friend he needs a new lover right now. Hit the bards, drag the gutters, whatever he has to do to get someone to be with whenever she "drops in." If you happen to be there, answer the phone and pretend she has interrputed serious love-making or come to the bedroom door in a set of garters and edible underwear you keep around for just such an occasion. It is extremely important to show . manipulative ex-lovers that the relationship is overand no amount of manipulation will bring it back again. A weak, uncertain, or ambivalent response only prolongs the agony. Let me also point out this behavior is not a female behavior pattern by any means. Men also try this type of manipulative ploy when they can't get their own way in a relationship. My female informants havementiond experiencing exactly the same type of behavior with cast-off male sex partners. Each of us, though, is responsible for his· or her own behavior. No one is responsible for another's (adult) behavior and I guess that's my real point. Whatever she does in response to his telling her firmly and directly that the relationship is OVER, FINNITO, POR LA VENT ANA is her responsibility and no one else's. Rejection is a normal part of adult life and we have to be prepared for it when it happens. C'mon, nothing. is sacred, you cow! distribute to you admiring peons. But that's okay, there's plenty of guano to go around (in fact, did you know that guano was a leading export of a South American country at one time? And no, there is no Provocia in the sub-equator re- gion). ' I must be getting soft or stupid; imagine, t,Ying to enlighten you cementheads with a little geogra phy! Well, let's see if you can find this: Read on for about 20 inches, take a left, tum on the light (it's just inside the door), step forward four paces, lift the seat, and deliver yourseff over to the glistening porcelin where you will find a nice swirlie! And since we're near the subject of the bowl and what goes there, here goes this ••• At 8~1_ 5 p.m. Sunday night, my big sis and I decided to spend our Earth Evening throwing non-degradable styrofoam bricks at hippies. That got dull, so we headed over to the com puter lab at the union (I just love running up and down the. halls there). But things at the lab sure weren't dull. My sis got dissed by one of the monitors - who, incidentally DO NOT CONSULT, and are very proud of this ignorance-rich adage. She lost her ID card, and like so many others shouted, "I lost my l.D. card, and at the price of over $1,000 per term for books and tuition, I refuse to spend even another $6 of my money to buy a replacement just to prove I actually attend this fine institution - here's my fee receipt card and my driver's license - that's acceptableW I know But the guy from some planet near the Crab Nebula reminded her: "Da signa say l.D.! You canna call computa center Monday!" Then - her face went stern like when she still lived at home and I See BILE, p. 9 Or.Andrew Barclay I I ; Life imitates art in real life Fatal Attraction scenario Dear Dr. Sex: I am friends with a guy who is having a terrible time breaking up with a former girlfirend. She drops over to his apartment whenever she is "in the neighborhooo" any time, day or night, without warning. She has told him if she finds another woman there or if she even hears he is dating someone else, she knows she won't be able to handle it. Honestly, Dr. Barclay, she says she can't live without him and that she is going to commit suicide if he qits seeing her. He is being torn up by worry and quilt over the situation. Do you think she wold really kill herself over a broken college relationship? What if he has another woman over and she does commit suicide because she hears of it? Is he then responsible for her death? It's a terrible situation, what can he do, what should he do? Thanks. Dana Dear Dana: Was his former girlfriend this way before they went to see Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction? I define this • the Welcome back snivelling snot suckers! Another week of reek to OUT and ABOUT eeeeeeeeeeoeeoooeeeeeeee .EAST LANSING 9: Rich & Mo Del Grosso, Howard Armstrong & Robert Jones §Dll'\'iil @(J i;>@J11©1\'iillle@ 2-3 May: Ron Brooks Trio 4-5: Betty Joplin with the Ron Brooks Trio 6: Clark & Reed Jam Session (jazz musicians welcome) 7: The 2-5- 1 Orchestra 8: Keller & Kocher Quartet 9-10: Ron Brooks Trio §ODllil\'iil lrlll@ 2 May: Stir Crazy ~D©lk 8a 2 May: J.D. Lamb 3: Trinidad Tripoli 4-5: First Light 8: Beer on the -Penguin 9: The Hannibals ~W©llil@@lka 3 May: Vudu Hippies 4: Elvis Hitler with Inside Out 5: Junk Monkeys with Happy Tom & Happy Accident ~~~ 3 May: The Jones . . DETROIT ~\'fO!lil ... 2 May: Tacha & Friends 3: Only a Mother with Pluto Gang 4: Firehose $1} .. ~ll'@W. 5 May: Social Distortion with Gang Green and The Almighty Lumberjacks of Death · ' ~©'f/©10 ©>©Ilk IMJlllllill@ Th@©Jflll'@ 8 MOy: Chick Corea Electric Band ~OQIJI}?) illJ@O<§l@OI}?)@~ 4 May: Agitpop with Goober & the Peas 8: The Melvins with Mol Triffid II.Don ... au 4 May: Frank Allison & the Odd Sox 5: Walk the Dogma .. dflkr IMJD©llilD@©Jllil ~e 11 May: Little Feat ~ IMl©J~De , . 5 May: Sweet Alice with Dirty Deeds and Kiss' d ~OWDV, KID.SI I WANT Y'ALL TO MEET L>0680Y.' Ml, RALPl-4 ... WE'LL START WITM TWO PINK FUZZIES ... MMM ... A FUZZY DRINK ... TMAT .SOUND.S GOOD! MEY, CHECK IT OUT! DOG SOY'S SMOWIN' EVERYONE MIS SCARf IP>@@ll ®ll@@llll 2-6 May: Uptown Band 7: Blue Avenue Delegates 8: Capitol City Band 9-13: Uptown Band ~II'~ C@ll\li@ll' l:!ll@C;J@ now-13 May: Images of an Idyllic Past: The photographs of Edward S. Curtis now-13: Masters of Fine Arts Exhibition IJ.im!llliG!cDuulk 4-5 May: Souvenir 8: Born Naked U;ilhHimllll~imcHc now-4 May: photographs by Dan Williams 7: photographs by Stephen Strom GJ F==ii::~S~ Sp..LJi..D . ' ~,- Nil 6~~~ =tJ11~t~~ ~ /;~PrlN~ ~=t-i~· ~-.~et ·cafeteria at the international ~ter tl-\e-< \.Jl\\l~ N.J.AdSI MN. ~1,,,,)D . '<'OU ~ ™'"-'\(OF. \-l>re~ UV' ~~D Ci2.oeJ!! O~ 1b fitO. w~u.. ~,... -rt-feJ\ ta.a .MOMey-ThcnMy ~~! r.JO - lo 7:00 ,_ Mley r.JO - IO 4:00 ,_ •••.•12••••' 1 Coupon Special 1' I I I I I hamburger and • _,__..,.,.. Buy any : $ave 60 cents I _ I on an order of I_,-.....-;:~­ FRIES . I I I I (l!.apirea May n. 1990) I I Nor nlid with ay adar:r I I I I ••••••••• 6991111 llllwubly frlced foMI WIG De& l.l&ale bCra care coupoa Bagel Frageh>eli This Week'• Question: . What's your favorite thing . about The Bagel Fragel? a. The superhip patio for · eating great food in the sun. b. The handy dandy ultra- . groovy uR-1 coupons. c. The prices, man! The prices! d. Last time I was there Elvis ordered 12 doggels ... to go! r ii41b. c;;'~;d-B'e';f1 Sandwich, · : 1 fragel, 1 1 I medium pop,_and I I I bagel chips $3.85 : : JI. I . exp: May 8,1990 --------- \. r- - ----- - --, . 1 2 Fragels, 1 & I I : : Small : Regular Coffee : · $1.00 I I I I J ---------- \. exp. May 8, 1990 .. . BYSTEPHANIERAE uR-1 MUSIC CORRESPONDENT DETROIT - Tom Ellard and Stephen Jones of Severed Heads are not your usual industrial band, not In appearance, performance, ar personality. They demonstrated that recently, when they performed at the Majestic with opening.band MC 900 Ft. Jesus and DJ Zero. "I feel as though I am inside a giant mouth," Ellard said from the inverted stage at the beginning of the Apri I 13 show. His partner nodded from across the stage. They were on opposite sides, with two movie screens flashing videos . behind them. The visual entertainment was in the videos, not the band, as they really didn't leave the spots they started from. Ellard kept the heavy beat going with his drum machine, while performing the spacey melodic sounds. with the eerie vocals that characterize Severed Heads today. Jones ran the video equipment. They were very colorful and 'abstract videos, using more graphic art than straight filming. "We do all the videos ourselves," Ellard said. "MTV is just starting to play them; like "Big Car" is out right now, but we've got over five hours worth of video-more than you can shake a stick at." This style of performing is a more recent development for them. Severed Heads has actually been around for more than a decade. . "Severed Heads Is a band that's been going on since 197,9," said Ellard . "I joined around that time. Two other guys left and another guy joined, then another guy joined and another guy left, and Stephen came . in and this other guy left, and this has been going on for a long while. "If you watch Dallas, there's episode 1,2;3,4,5 ... well, we con sider this the same sort of thing . What you see here is what's been happening since about 1985." . Ellard and Jones must be the right combination. Their popularity is growing stronger and stronger, especially with their latest album, Rotund for Success. It contains two alternative dance hitswith "All Saints Day" and "Greater Reward." The album Is getting heavy play on college radio stations, as well as personal systems. But what really· makes this one stand out In a record store ls Its cover. It's a giant orange pumpkin against a black cosmic background. "Anecdote number 26 coming up," said Ellard. "What was going on was that the local record company was going 'It's (Rotund for Success) 2 May 1990 , university Reporter-Intelligencer • 1f Reviews Vega's takes a third step on the road to perfection ~Suzanne Vega ~Days of Open Hand Suzanne Vega's new release, Days of Open Hand, has come forth after her long hiatus from recording as yet another step for her on the musical road to perfection. The last time we heard from Vega was with her surprise #3 hit "Luka" off her 1987 album, Solitude Standing, and in '85 she had a hit in the U.K. with her self-titled debut. Now, like with her early albums, she comes out as a breath of fresh creativity amid the likes of Milli Vanilll, Warrant, and tenth generation Rod Stewart. In no way is Days of Open Hand a remake of "Luka" hits, nor is it a late attempt to capitalize on that success. This album combines the finer points of her previous work and adds her new inspirartions together to show a more mature and professional Vega. In this 11 -song album, Vega collaborated with Anton Sanko, her keyboardist and boyfriend, who has had a great effect on her in their co production, their six co-written songs, and his introduction of programming, synthesizers, and strings. The first track, "Tired of Sleeping," is a sorrowful, waltz-like rythm which draws on images of the occult. Next, "Men in a War" begins like a 60's folk song, but when the band breaks the song almost turns into a pop song although it still conveys its strong meaning in her voice. "Book of Dreams,· the first single, stands out due to its catchy hooks and simple chorus. This possible top 40 hit could easily be sung by XTC or Crowded House, two of her contemporary influences. (For a Paul McCartney fans, listen for a similar guitar riff in this song like his "My Brave Face.") Another gem is "Institution Green;" its interesting rim shots and percussion add a strong beat to her vocal delivery style. Moreover, "Roorn Off The Street" echoes her creative '87 tune, "Tom's Diner," in which a complete story is told with intense imagery. One can look at her slow, sad, string-based track, "Fifty-Fifty Chance," for contrasts and similarities to the Beatles classic "Eleanor Rigby." This song helps show off her diversity and beautiful voice, which at times sounds like a child's and at other times reaches erotic mystery. This rich, high-quality recording is due to the fine digital mix and mastering work and because of the tight playing of the backup band, the use of uniq·ue instruments, and the great harmony and background vocals of Vega and Shawn Colvin. It can be seen that Suzanne Vega has learned from her past success and in doing sp she has added more creativity and maturity to her latest release, Days Of Open Hand. Although this album might take more than one casual listen to be able to see the wisdom in it, soon the songs show Vega's talent to new fan or old fan alike. - JAllES C. VLAHAKIS Sandy Duncan city! Glass Eyes album a confused reverie of sound ~Glass Eye ~ Hello Young Lovers On first spin, Glass Eye's latest release, Hello Young Lovers, sounds too disjointed to be listenable, too eclectic to be effective, and most of all, too strange to be enjoyable. But play it again Sam, and the varied sounds and instruments begin to fall into place without blending, and the story-telling provides all the cohesiveness necessary for a provocative listen. Like a junk drawer, where none of the contents belong together, but nonetheless have an aesthetic appeal New Wednesdays Reggae Night All Rum Drinks $1.75 Feature This Week: Ross Bongi Dub Band 101 E. Grand River Home of The Sharkbowll when thrown into a whole, the chaotic nature of the Austin, Texas quartet's sound provides pleasure through its jumbledness. The notes and parts bounce into and off each other, forming peculiar and uneven sounding songs. The . , strange combinations of twangy guitar, and engine revving bass, . offbeat drums, jazzy piano, and a muffled accordian build the most distinctive feature of the 13-song collection. The two male and two female band's strength lies in songwriting, however. The lyrics are never overtly straightforward, they instead use strong imagery to bring across subtle For Reservations Call The HOT TUB HOT LINE 332-6318 (Located corner of Grove & Linden, near Dooley's) r-----------, I $2.00 Off : Your Next Hot Tub Rental 1 I I (with Coupon) . I I Exp. June 2, 1990 ----------- L Limit One D_iscount Per Visit .J Greater Lansing's Best Hot Tub Experience Featuring 3 Indoor & 4 Outdoor Private Tubs • Gift Certificates & Party Rates Available • Tanning Booths & Tanning Accelerators I've stayed the same/ through all these changes in atmosphere.• On the back album cover, three of the four members are pictured drink in hand, and it would be a good bet that alcohol had at least some role in this production. MayQe that'i; why it's disorientated and incoherent, but nonetheless worthwhile. The album is generally too slow to groove to and too punk-driven to satisfy those who see music as a science. But for others who see order in chaos, Glass Eye is worth a look see. -STEVE BYRNE ,,,//aJJz, 4 MeM? Let Us Help You Out-Come To GARY'S CAMPUS HAIR SALON $9.00 Uni-sex Hair Styling "II eut IJ- 'lfei pJUoei!, Bel-.. 351 -6511 • 549 E. Grand Rive (next to Confection Connection) M-F 8am-7 m •Sat 9am-2 m points. For example, in one of the album's better and harder tunes, "Charhead," which seems to be describing the thought processes of a paranoid on LSD, the narrator sings, "I can hit my head/on the bed/ for fun." The ability to deal with one's self and with others is a theme that runs through the album. It ap.pears in 'White Walls," the album's highlight, which uses a hard, jazz/blues fusion peano and a whiny, early Cure-like guitar. In a morbid self-exploration, the soul searcher disbelievingly states, "Nothing has changed/ except the house I'm living in/ it's hard to believe/ EATCBEAP Dirty Dog Deal $1.99 Coney Basket Includes One Coney Dog, Fries and Cole Slaw. Everyday 'till 11 pm r--FREE---, I I Coney Basket I when you buy one basket I I and two pops and when I you say the secret words: I I "Double Dog" I I Everyday 'till 11 p.m. '---~.!'~~~--' WE DELIVER 332-2381